What’s in a word?

[xyz48B]

“I am a hot, dominant and passionate Latin bi boy.”

“I am open minded and I like to be dominant!”

“I am a versatile and can be very submissive or dominant, and my main goal is to satisfy your needs.”*

”Passionate or I can be very dominant.”

This word, “dominant,” comes up in a lot of RM ads. As you see, one example says he can be both “submissive or dominant.” Another antonymizes it with “passionate.”

What the hell does this word mean? It seems like another empty, overused jargon in the lexicological soup that these guys use to hook and reel in clients. It doesn’t strike me as especially distinguishing like “watersports” or “fisting” do. 
 

*I also call bullshit on the main goal here. The main goal is to score a gig and take my money. 

[xyz48B]

I guess no one cares. 🤷🏼‍♂️ 

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

You cannot be both naturally dominant, but also completely passive.  Human nature really means you lean one way or another.  You can fake it, but people will eventually figure it out.

For a lot of these guys, it's jargon.  Bullshit.  Ad copy meant to sell themselves.

Dominant, for me, means you can control the situation with ease.  You lead.  There's a natural flow to the time, but there's no question that you're definitely the guy in charge.  There's a huge contingent of clients who want that.

But there's nothing worse than booking a guy who says they're one thing and you get another.

 

[jeezifonly]

A lot of ads are written by guys whose first language is not English, and autocorrect spits out the wrong ending of the word. I see dominate and dominant get mixed up, and the past tense (dominated) gets lost completely. A couple of simple questions to the provider can clarify, if he’s visually appealing enough. I prefer give-n-take where we both have time to lead. Just so long as he’s passionant.

[+ purplekow]

1 hour ago, Benjamin_Nicholas said:

You cannot be both naturally dominant, but also completely passive.  Human nature really means you lean one way or another.  You can fake it, but people will eventually figure it out.

For a lot of these guys, it's jargon.  Bullshit.  Ad copy meant to sell themselves.

Dominant, for me, means you can control the situation with ease.  You lead.  There's a natural flow to the time, but there's no question that you're definitely the guy in charge.  There's a huge contingent of clients who want that.

But there's nothing worse than booking a guy who says they're one thing and you get another.

 

I agree with Benjamin.  While it is usual to think dominant  represents aggression and the insertive partner, in fact is one can be dominant while getting their ass pounded.  

The dominant partner is the one who dictates the flow of the activity and he is the one in charge of the pace of the activity and which activities are being highlighted.  An example of this is a bound partner being edged by well paced oral stimulation.  The bound partner may be dominant as he may be controlling how long and how deep the the oral stimulation is either by word or by the thrust of his hips.  On the other hand, the partner doing the oral stimulation may be dominant if he is the one controlling the pace or if he is the one forcing the action on an "unwilling" partner.  

So when I see dominant in an ad, I feel it is best for one to find out what the escort means by dominant.  But in my case, it rarely matters because I know who the dominant one is going to be, no matter his response.  .  

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

2 hours ago, jeezifonly said:

Just so long as he’s passionant.

 

[mike carey]

4 hours ago, Benjamin_Nicholas said:

Dominant, for me, means you can control the situation with ease.  You lead.  There's a natural flow to the time, but there's no question that you're definitely the guy in charge.  There's a huge contingent of clients who want that.

What he said. I relate completely to that description., so sign me up. I've read enough of Benjamin's blog to have seen varied accounts of him guiding and directing a companion though intimate situations. Of course that relies on his accounts being accurate and he could be faking it. Somehow I doubt it.

[xyz48B]

6 hours ago, purplekow said:

So when I see dominant in an ad, I feel it is best for one to find out what the escort means by dominant.

I like to ask them what they mean and they simply say they’re dominant if that’s what I want. And I’m thinking – not helpful. Just like @Benjamin_Nicholassaid. Ad copy to sell themselves.