PROVIDERS: Your Thoughts on Hemorrhoids and Skin Tags

[lonely_john]

QUESTIONS FOR PROVIDERS:

I recommended a provider to a friend and after they met my friend was ecstatic and said that he would definitely book again, but the provider was not so happy. I think when he texted me to follow up on the appointment he was even mad at me when he said that my friend had what it seemed to be a HUGE hemorrhoid that looked more like an STD and that he was 'this' close to rim him (he's a Top) and that when he felt something strange with his fingers, he used his phone's flashlight to confirmed his suspicion. After the encounter he went for testing to make sure it wasn't anything contagious, and even warned me that if he got something from my friend I would also be one to blame.

Luckily for me, all tests came negative and I told him that I was completely unaware that my friend (who's actually very fit, handsome, and in good health) had this problem, to what he replied that the hemorrhoid was so disgusting that he couldn't even get closer because it looked like it was about to explode. In the end, he made a nasty remark saying that both hemorrhoids and skin tags are likely a proof that the client engages in frequent uncontrolled sex sessions, probably does PNP, and does not take good care of their own health because either problem can be solved now with simple medical procedures. Now I'm thinking that my friend will be disappointed when this provider declines his invitation to meet up again. Not being an escort, I thought his attitude was a bit judgmental so I thought of better asking the professionals, as you've probably seen it all in this business.

1. I want to know if this is true for you too, or do you have a more tolerant POV regarding this issue?
2. What are you DO's and DON'Ts when it comes down to hemorrhoids and skin tags back there?
3. What can a client do to ease the mood or test the waters before telling the provider that he has a hemorrhoid or skin tag?

Edited October 15, 2021 by lonely_john

[+ nycman]

Although generally harmless, skin tags might be hard for an untrained eye to distinguish from genital warts.

Your friend should see a dermatologist either way. Both are relatively easy to remove. 

Hemorrhoids are an entirely different beast. In general, they come and go. Occasionally they require surgery to remove. 

Sounds like your provider is a dumb ass. If he was concerned (rightfully or wrongly) about an STD, then he  shouldn’t
have been sticking his dick in it. And had he broached the topic with me, I would have made that clear in no uncertain terms. 

Of course, your "friend" doesn’t come off sounding like a real prince either. One has a certain responsibility for keeping the
playground presentable.

Edited October 15, 2021 by nycman

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

2 hours ago, nycman said:

One has a certain responsibility for keeping the playground presentable.

I believe that in addition to a stirred gin martini, this was one of the many important things Auntie Mame taught young Patrick. 

Edited October 15, 2021 by Benjamin_Nicholas

[Jamie21]

Always do a visual check before you go down there!

I’m intrigued by the provider using his phone light to have a look. I wonder how he did that discreetly? Did he say “that’s such a beautiful asshole I’m just going to take a pic as a reminder to me of it’s beauty?” and then shine the light in there? Hmmm?

It’s why I prefer to keep the lights on, so I can see everything. At least what’s on the outside... Sometimes when a finger is in I’ll feel the scars or tags from former hemorrhoids. It’s a warning sign, and then before going close with my tongue I’ll do a visual check which can be done discreetly as a glute massage move. Obviously also checking for cleanliness (even with the pre session shower, very occasionally clients still seem to be less than Nordic valley fresh 😱).

Then I can answer: To rim or not to rim, that is the question. 
Whether ‘tis nobler in the mind to suffer…the tags and hemorrhoids of outrageous arses…or to take arms against a sea of STD’s…and by opposing, avoid them?

With apologies to Will Shakespeare.

[HotWhiteThirties]

Unless there are some details left out to suggest otherwise, this provider is a total asshole. How is this your problem? Just cause you're gay doesn't mean you inspect the assholes of all your gay friends prior to making a recommendation for who fucks them. Seems it would fall under the category of potential "hazards" of the profession that are sometimes encountered. Further, to discuss the encounter with you in the way it is described puts you in an awkward position and is childish. Grow up and handle your business with the "offending" partners and leave others out of it. Does he expect you to address the issue? Again...awkward. 
 

That said, hemorrhoids suck, and can happen to anyone - in shape and attractive or otherwise. And now thanks to this provider you know this detail about your friend and can have that thought In the back of your mind when you chat with him in the future. 
 

I say this as someone who is not currently suffering a hemorrhoid. 😜

Edited October 15, 2021 by HotWhiteThirties

[lonely_john]

9 hours ago, nycman said:

Sounds like your provider is a dumb ass. If he was concerned (rightfully or wrongly) about an STD, then he  shouldn’t have been sticking his dick in it. And had he broached the topic with me, I would have made that clear in no uncertain terms.

He's actually a very nice guy with a good number of reviews but he does have low tolerance when it comes to poor sexual health and hygiene. I think he completed the encounter because it was a 2h session and he always uses protection, but I think he was mostly upset because my friend was someone I recommended. I was just completely unaware of what was about to happen.

[lonely_john]

9 hours ago, nycman said:

One has a certain responsibility for keeping the playground presentable.

7 hours ago, Benjamin_Nicholas said:

I believe that in addition to a stirred gin martini, this was one of the many important things Auntie Mame taught young Patrick. 

I completely agree on this, but I would be completely embarrassed to bring this up to my friend. If my friend asks me why the guy doesn't want to meet him again, what should I tell him? I think it's a personal and sensitive topic.

 

[lonely_john]

6 hours ago, Jamie21 said:

Always do a visual check before you go down there!

I’m intrigued by the provider using his phone light to have a look. I wonder how he did that discreetly? Did he say “that’s such a beautiful asshole I’m just going to take a pic as a reminder to me of it’s beauty?” and then shine the light in there? Hmmm?

It’s why I prefer to keep the lights on, so I can see everything. At least what’s on the outside... Sometimes when a finger is in I’ll feel the scars or tags from former hemorrhoids. It’s a warning sign, and then before going close with my tongue I’ll do a visual check which can be done discreetly as a glute massage move. Obviously also checking for cleanliness (even with the pre session shower, very occasionally clients still seem to be less than Nordic valley fresh 😱).

Then I can answer: To rim or not to rim, that is the question. 
Whether ‘tis nobler in the mind to suffer…the tags and hemorrhoids of outrageous arses…or to take arms against a sea of STD’s…and by opposing, avoid them?

With apologies to Will Shakespeare.

He's a pro so he probably knows what he's talking about when he said it was nasty, and found a way to "shed some light on the issue" in a discreet manner despite the fact that it was a massage session with dimmed lights, that would later turn into escorting.

What I'm feeling so far from the providers on this thread, is that hemorrhoids and skin tags are a no go?

[Jamie21]

13 minutes ago, lonely_john said:

What I'm feeling so far from the providers on this thread, is that hemorrhoids and skin tags are a no go?

Not necessarily. Skin tags are fairly common. Sometimes icky things are part of the job. I’d just say “it depends “.

Much worse for me is poor hygiene and lack of preparation. That’s definitely a no go. Those things are entirely within the client’s control so I expect that they attend to them properly otherwise their session will be severely limited. Health conditions that are unsightly but not contra indications for massage are just challenges to overcome.

[Luv2play]

On 10/15/2021 at 4:04 AM, Jamie21 said:

Always do a visual check before you go down there!

I’m intrigued by the provider using his phone light to have a look. I wonder how he did that discreetly? Did he say “that’s such a beautiful asshole I’m just going to take a pic as a reminder to me of it’s beauty?” and then shine the light in there? Hmmm?

It’s why I prefer to keep the lights on, so I can see everything. At least what’s on the outside... Sometimes when a finger is in I’ll feel the scars or tags from former hemorrhoids. It’s a warning sign, and then before going close with my tongue I’ll do a visual check which can be done discreetly as a glute massage move. Obviously also checking for cleanliness (even with the pre session shower, very occasionally clients still seem to be less than Nordic valley fresh 😱).

Then I can answer: To rim or not to rim, that is the question. 
Whether ‘tis nobler in the mind to suffer…the tags and hemorrhoids of outrageous arses…or to take arms against a sea of STD’s…and by opposing, avoid them?

With apologies to Will Shakespeare.

Your middle name must be Hamlet. Lol

[Luv2play]

On 10/15/2021 at 10:20 AM, lonely_john said:

He's actually a very nice guy with a good number of reviews but he does have low tolerance when it comes to poor sexual health and hygiene. I think he completed the encounter because it was a 2h session and he always uses protection, but I think he was mostly upset because my friend was someone I recommended. I was just completely unaware of what was about to happen.

I have often recommended an escort to a friend but never the reverse. See what trouble it can get you into!

[Jarrod_Uncut]

On 10/14/2021 at 10:23 PM, lonely_john said:

.

1. I want to know if this is true for you too, or do you have a more tolerant POV regarding this issue?
2. What are you DO's and DON'Ts when it comes down to hemorrhoids and skin tags back there?
3. What can a client do to ease the mood or test the waters before telling the provider that he has a hemorrhoid or skin tag?

Wow. Funny topic indeed, though with unintended consequences. And definitely short sighted on his part to assume a hemorrhoid is an STDs. Like, who said hemorrhoids are contagious?

Now: if it was an HPV polyps that is a whole different thing. But sounds like there was just 1 bump versus several. In which case sounds like a hemorrhoid that should probably receive doctor attention. 

This reminds me of an advice given during this “HIV/STD” training course I was attending awhile ago. The instructor said every gay man, especially bottoms should have a designated “hole checker”. As in, have someone once a month/year to visually check your butt for abnormal stuff. HPV is an STD and if left untreated can lead to rectal and anal cancer. And if it ever has to be surgically removed, doing anal will be an unpleasant experience (just stuff I’ve learned from clients over years)

However, there’s also something out there called “penile papules”. It’s a harmless non contagious thing that almost resembles HPV. But it’s not. So proper identification is important.

That said, I don’t mind hemorrhoids, in some cases some guys look like they have a pussy with a labia 😆 not the worse thing. However I have twice met clients with excess skin tags right around the lower ass/thigh area. In cases like that, I generally have to cancel the session of any anal, because I’m easily grossed out about certain things (stuff like dirty, discolored linoleum floors give me the heebie jebbies). 
 

As far as the slagging of the sex worker: I get it that maybe he was a bit dramatic BUT I say this all the time: escorts are NOT doctors. We’re not in the biz to expose ourselves to deformities or extreme medical situations. That’s why I have my limits on what I’ll do and which clients I’ll see. You don’t have to be a beauty model but, I also reserve the right to not meet people if I see they have a condition I’m not comfortable with.

[Luv2play]

7 hours ago, Luv2play said:

I have often recommended an escort to a friend but never the reverse. See what trouble it can get you into!

Confused? We'll, you see I have sex with providers but not with my friends. So I know whereof I speak when it comes to the former but don't have a clue about the latter, including whether they have hemorrhoids.

[+ Coolwave35]

9 hours ago, Jarrod_Uncut said:

The instructor said every gay man, especially bottoms should have a designated “hole checker”. As in, have someone once a month/year to visually check your butt for abnormal stuff. 

I used this as my foot in the door on Grindr to get with two really hot guys. I offered to trim their body hair to make it aesthetically pleasing. I explained that I didn’t want to hook up, I just like helping hot guys look even better by doing some trimming. As we met and they got comfy and liked the results, I proposed checking their holes under these same pretenses. Both times they said go for it, and it has become a part of our monthly groom sessions. It has now (several years later) progressed to rimming and mutual release once the inspection is over.  

[lonely_john]

14 hours ago, Luv2play said:

I have often recommended an escort to a friend but never the reverse. See what trouble it can get you into!

This is actually what I did. I recommended the escort to my friend, but for the purpose I asked them both in advance. There was no foreseen problem because I knew both personally and I thought that their personalities would match and they would have good chemistry. I only knew one of them sexually, the escort obviously; but I never knew my friend in that way so I was completely unaware of the massive hemorrhoid he had (according to my guy). So, I don't think I made any mistake intentionally but of course for the escort it felt like I did. I know that he's finicky about cleanliness and presentation and will keep it in mind moving forward. I hope that his perception about me didn't change and I can keep seeing him in the future.

[lonely_john]

11 hours ago, Jarrod_Uncut said:

short sighted on his part to assume a hemorrhoid is an STDs. Like, who said hemorrhoids are contagious?

Ok, I think at this point I have to tell what my escort said: "It was a HUGE hemorrhoid but definitely there was something else in there", which I'm not going to argue with because he's the Pro. I'm texting with him and he's being very friendly and open to discuss a possible new appointment with me. This is not the first time I've recommended him to friends but it's the first time one referral gives him trouble so I think he told me those things in the heat of the moment. I know he's a good guy because he's done a great job with every person, including the guy with the hemorrhoid, he just doesn't know that whenever he wants to book again, my guy might not be available. Hopefully he will become self-conscious about his problem and address it with a doctor/surgeon before booking with any provider again.

[+ nycman]

1 hour ago, lonely_john said:

"It was a HUGE hemorrhoid but definitely there was something else in there"

Hopefully your "provider friend" or you, were man enough to tell your friend, 
"Dude, you need to see a doctor. There’s something wrong with your asshole."
He can’t see what you’re talking about and believe it or not may not even be
aware of it’s presence. We’re all speculating on hemorrhoids, but “something 
else in there" brings in the full spectrum of possible diseases including cancer. 

It might be nothing, but you owe it to your friend to man up and speak up. 

"If you see something….say something."

I’m just worried because you seem to be more concerned about wether or 
not this escort is willing to see you again than you are with what’s wrong with
your "friend’".

Priorities. 

Edited October 17, 2021 by nycman

[lonely_john]

7 minutes ago, nycman said:

Hopefully your "provider friend" or you, were man enough to tell your friend, 
"Dude, you need to see a doctor. There’s something wrong with your asshole."
He can’t see what you’re talking about and believe it or not may not even be
aware of it’s presence. We’re all speculating on hemorrhoids, but “something 
else in there" brings in the full spectrum of possible diseases including cancer. 

It might be nothing, but you owe it to your friend to man up and speak up. 

"If you see something….say something."

I’m just worried because you seem to be more concerned about wether or 
not this escort is willing to see you again than you are with what’s wrong with
your "friend’".

Priorities. 

I'm not sure telling him "Dude, you need to see a doctor. There’s something wrong with your asshole." is something I could say to my friend. It's just too rude. I will think of a way of talking to him but rather will suggest the escort to tell him because in theory I'm completely unaware of his issue. The escort is the one who did a "closer" inspection. I will tell him to politely suggest that he goes to see a doctor when/if my friend asks for another appointment.

[jtwalker]

22 minutes ago, lonely_john said:

I'm not sure telling him "Dude, you need to see a doctor. There’s something wrong with your asshole." is something I could say to my friend. It's just too rude. I will think of a way of talking to him but rather will suggest the escort to tell him because in theory I'm completely unaware of his issue. The escort is the one who did a "closer" inspection. I will tell him to politely suggest that he goes to see a doctor when/if my friend asks for another appointment.

An uncomfortable conversation, but if there is something "more" going on you could be saving your friends life.  Were it my friend, I would definitely figure out a way to say something.  Sure, it'd probably come out like, "Hey man, I found a great Proctologist" and it would be weird... but if I care about my friend, then its worth the awkward conversation.

[+ nycman]

8 hours ago, lonely_john said:

It's just too rude.

Saving lives is never rude….no matter how crude. 

 

[lonely_john]

2 hours ago, nycman said:

Saving lives is never rude….no matter how crude. 

 

Ok you need to chill the f*ck down. This thread is about hemorrhoids and skin tags ASKING PROVIDERS. So far you've been the only one talking about cancer and death. You can stop the drama now. Thanks.

[tenderloin]

At the risk of sharing too much, I will offer this -- I recently underwent a hemmorhoidectomy, and it was BY FAR the most physically painful and unpleasant experience I have ever been through.    Ever.   Picture a medieval torture dude in a mask with lots of scary implements.   I did it for primarily for cosmetic reasons and had I understood what the experience would be I would not have done it.  As this is a family site I'll not detail, but PM if you are curious and have a strong stomach. 

[jtwalker]

What about skin tags in other places, like armpits and whatnot?  Are they always a concern, or is it because of their similarity to warts near genitalia?

[Rod Hagen]

On 10/29/2021 at 1:45 PM, tenderloin said:

At the risk of sharing too much, I will offer this -- I recently underwent a hemmorhoidectomy, and it was BY FAR the most physically painful and unpleasant experience I have ever been through.    Ever.   Picture a medieval torture dude in a mask with lots of scary implements.   I did it for primarily for cosmetic reasons and had I understood what the experience would be I would not have done it.  As this is a family site I'll not detail, but PM if you are curious and have a strong stomach. 

 

Very sorry to hear that.  Years ago a friend of mine had that procedure and was in LOTS of pain afterward, so much so that he regretted it.

[lonely_john]

On 10/29/2021 at 4:45 PM, tenderloin said:

At the risk of sharing too much, I will offer this -- I recently underwent a hemmorhoidectomy, and it was BY FAR the most physically painful and unpleasant experience I have ever been through.    Ever.   Picture a medieval torture dude in a mask with lots of scary implements.   I did it for primarily for cosmetic reasons and had I understood what the experience would be I would not have done it.  As this is a family site I'll not detail, but PM if you are curious and have a strong stomach. 

44 minutes ago, Rod Hagen said:

Very sorry to hear that.  Years ago a friend of mine had that procedure and was in LOTS of pain afterward, so much so that he regretted it.

Does the pain go away eventually? If so, how long does it usually take to go away? I would assume that strong pain management medications are used during recovery? Hopefully the pain doesn't stay with the patient forever ...