Potential Clients sending pictures, and not following thru

[Jarrod_Uncut]

I’m just curious. I can’t help but ask.

 

But what is up with these people? I never really ask for a picture, usually just some basic primitive details like a name, age and whether they are top or bottom. However, some guys will send a pic...and me thinking they’re more serious, still end up being a flake.

 

I’m thinking of an instance during one of my visits earlier this month: guy sends me a picture with his mask on. Fair enough, but I ask him politely in a few messages later: do you care to send me a pic without your mask on (because why the fuck would you do that, not like going to catch COVID over the phone lol). He then gets his panties in a knot saying he is going to cancel, because he shouldn’t have to be “judged” by his looks...and then sends me a picture without his mask anyway ??‍♂️

 

So now I’m just like, don’t even send me a pic if you’re going to flake. I had a conversation with someone today, telling them that I still can’t have daily conversations with him just because he sent me a couple of pics of himself: at the end of the day I still never met him and he still hasn’t paid his deposit for the future session. So the hell would I even know if it’s him, or him 10 years ago ??‍♂️

 

Not to say all clients who send pics are this way, but it does seen more and more who do so...end up being flakes. Like today someone sent me a pic, and made like we were doing an appointment today. Flaked. So idk, what’s this all about.

[Becket]

"What's up with these people?" ..."end up being a flake." "Panties in a knot..." "more and more end up being flakes..."

This may not be bashing entire communities. But it can't make the clients around here comfortable. (who make up most of the board and have worked for years with Daddy to create a useful website, not a bitch site. And exactly who are you talking to in this post? Other escorts who might confirm your frustrations? It's a difficult business for escorts. I get it. I hear your frustrations. We all do. But our mentor just died. Maybe a little less with the petty stuff for a few days. Seriously, I'm cheering for you and do hope you make it. But I for one am feeling wounded and vulnerable at the moment. I'm sorry, it seems I'm picking on you. Sorry.

[BuffaloKyle]

I’m just curious. I can’t help but ask.

 

But what is up with these people? I never really ask for a picture, usually just some basic primitive details like a name, age and whether they are top or bottom. However, some guys will send a pic...and me thinking they’re more serious, still end up being a flake.

 

I’m thinking of an instance during one of my visits earlier this month: guy sends me a picture with his mask on. Fair enough, but I ask him politely in a few messages later: do you care to send me a pic without your mask on (because why the fuck would you do that, not like going to catch COVID over the phone lol). He then gets his panties in a knot saying he is going to cancel, because he shouldn’t have to be “judged” by his looks...and then sends me a picture without his mask anyway ??‍♂️

 

So now I’m just like, don’t even send me a pic if you’re going to flake. I had a conversation with someone today, telling them that I still can’t have daily conversations with him just because he sent me a couple of pics of himself: at the end of the day I still never met him and he still hasn’t paid his deposit for the future session. So the hell would I even know if it’s him, or him 10 years ago ??‍♂️

 

Not to say all clients who send pics are this way, but it does seen more and more who do so...end up being flakes. Like today someone sent me a pic, and made like we were doing an appointment today. Flaked. So idk, what’s this all about.

 

I think a lot of guys who send you a pic of themselves without you asking probably have low self esteem and want reassurance that they look ok for you. So I could see how they flake then still thinking that they aren't good enough. Kind of sad actually.

 

Although it might not even be really their pic in the first place too and they are just big time game players.

[+ nycman]

h

[Bootybuilder]

I think a lot of guys who send you a pic of themselves without you asking probably have low self esteem and want reassurance that they look ok for you. So I could see how they flake then still thinking that they aren't good enough. Kind of sad actually.

 

Although it might not even be really their pic in the first place too and they are just big time game players.

Yeah when clients send me a pic it doesn’t give me the best impression. I interpret it as their way of flirting.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

And exactly who are you talking to in this post? But I for one am feeling wounded and vulnerable at the moment. I'm sorry, it seems I'm picking on you. Sorry.

 

To start: I sympathize with your vulnerability. I recently lost a friend as well earlier this year. It’s hard to keep a straight persona.

 

However, I’m talking to the universe. The universe may include those who happen to be escorts. Even though these questions may feel uncomfortable, I still have a reason to ask them. There’s a lot of stuff that goes on, that I can’t always comprehend. And yes, it gets annoying when it becomes recurring. But 2 minds are better the one, usually. They’re just questions though, not any plot to harp on any individual person. So there should be no hard feelings on anyone’s part.

 

But yes: people send pictures all the time and get laid in the best way. That’s facts. But, I’m talking about a very specific process, that pertains to this line of work.

 

 

I think a lot of guys who send you a pic of themselves without you asking probably have low self esteem and want reassurance that they look ok for you. So I could see how they flake then still thinking that they aren't good enough. Kind of sad actually.

 

Although it might not even be really their pic in the first place too and they are just big time game players.

 

I didn’t want to say it, but you read ? my mind to the T ?? I could see if they sent the picture and DIDN’T flake, but why bother doing it, if they aren’t going to go thru with the visit? Would they not be concerned with a sex worker possibly using their pics in ways that could be, not great?

Not that I have a reason to, but hypothetically speaking.

 

Its just ridiculous. On the one hand it’s a very nice and reassuring gesture WHEN they actually follow thru. On the other hand, it cheapens our correspondence to a Grindr chat session, when they send pics and then ghost midstream.

 

Not to mention my ad phone is not plugged into an unlimited carrier. Those pics ad to my data usage.

Edited April 2, 2021 by Jarrod_Uncut

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

Umm, hey guys...

 

How have we not yet mentioned Jarrod's SEXY AS ALL FUCK new profile photo?

 

https://www.companyofmen.org/members/jarrod_uncut.21862/

[Jarrod_Uncut]

How have we not yet mentioned Jarrod's SEXY AS ALL FUCK new profile photo?

 

Lol thanks luv! ? ...was just one of those random sitting on a couch hotel moments, where I felt like getting my selfie stand out.

[Jamie21]

To start: I sympathize with your vulnerability. I recently lost a friend as well earlier this year. It’s hard to keep a straight persona.

 

However, I’m talking to the universe. The universe may include those who happen to be escorts. Even though these questions may feel uncomfortable, I still have a reason to ask them. There’s a lot of stuff that goes on, that I can’t always comprehend. And yes, it gets annoying when it becomes recurring. But 2 minds are better the one, usually. They’re just questions though, not any plot to harp on any individual person. So there should be no hard feelings on anyone’s part.

 

But yes: people send pictures all the time and get laid in the best way. That’s a true story. But, I’m talking about a very specific process, that pertains to this line of work.

 

 

 

 

I didn’t want to say it, but you read ? my mind to the T ?? I could see if they sent the picture and DIDN’T flake, but why bother doing it, if they aren’t going to go thru with the visit? Would they not be concerned with a sex worker possibly using their pics in ways that could be, not great?

Not that I have a reason to, but hypothetically speaking.

 

Its just ridiculous. On the one hand it’s a very nice and reassuring gesture WHEN they actually follow thru. On the other hand, it cheapens our correspondence to a Grindr chat session, when they send pics and then ghost midstream.

 

Not to mention my ad phone is not plugged into an unlimited carrier. Those pics ad to my data usage.

Seems like more of a gripe against time wasters in general since most of those who just do endless chat also seem to send pics. If a client approaches me with lots of questions that end up like sex chat...such as “tell me what positions you’ll fuck me in etc” then 99% certain they’ll never book. Most of those guys will send me a dick pic, often as the first thing they send.

I think it’s their way of flirting with an escort, it gets them off if I respond likewise (which I don’t do as I recognise the pattern), and it gives them some kind of proximity to a world they’re anxious about exploring.

I’m careful though not to assume because some clients are self conscious about their body or cock and want the reassurance that they’re fit enough or their cock is big enough to meet a masseur /escort. If that’s the case then fine, send a pic. You’ll get my confirmation that you’re perfect to visit because I don’t make any requirements about what you look like. All I say to then is “Come and have a great time sexy”. We all have hang ups about some feature or other and no one needs a provider reinforcing that...my job is to find the sexiness in them (it’s always there) and help them discover and enjoy it.

Time wasters are part of the job, recognise them early and just say “let me know if you want to book” and then disengage if they keep flirting.

[Jamie21]

To start: I sympathize with your vulnerability. I recently lost a friend as well earlier this year. It’s hard to keep a straight persona.

 

However, I’m talking to the universe. The universe may include those who happen to be escorts. Even though these questions may feel uncomfortable, I still have a reason to ask them. There’s a lot of stuff that goes on, that I can’t always comprehend. And yes, it gets annoying when it becomes recurring. But 2 minds are better the one, usually. They’re just questions though, not any plot to harp on any individual person. So there should be no hard feelings on anyone’s part.

 

But yes: people send pictures all the time and get laid in the best way. That’s facts. But, I’m talking about a very specific process, that pertains to this line of work.

 

 

 

 

I didn’t want to say it, but you read ? my mind to the T ?? I could see if they sent the picture and DIDN’T flake, but why bother doing it, if they aren’t going to go thru with the visit? Would they not be concerned with a sex worker possibly using their pics in ways that could be, not great?

Not that I have a reason to, but hypothetically speaking.

 

Its just ridiculous. On the one hand it’s a very nice and reassuring gesture WHEN they actually follow thru. On the other hand, it cheapens our correspondence to a Grindr chat session, when they send pics and then ghost midstream.

 

Not to mention my ad phone is not plugged into an unlimited carrier. Those pics ad to my data usage.

 

“There’s lots of stuff going on that I can’t comprehend” I agree!!! It’s difficult to get beneath some of the messages I get from potential clients. Definitely need to unload some of it to the universe to unpick sometimes.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

Time wasters are part of the job, recognise them early and just say “let me know if you want to book” and then disengage if they keep flirting.

 

Right, and in some areas much more than others. I went thru my iPhone blocked list, and it’s long...but it should be 3 times as long as it is lol. I haven’t been blocking enough.

 

But now, I’m going to even go so far as to just block anyone who’s texts and “ghosts” the 1st time. Because I been finding they more likely come back around and do it again at a later time, and I forget how they handled things last time. This week alone I’ve already blocked 3 numbers, all in the same area. It’s exactly why I initially wanted to just freeze my ad until I was ready to go on tour again. Why have an ad up, just to be irritated ??‍♂️ That’s not what I paid for.

 

But I spoke to RentMen, they assured me that soon they may be considering taking my suggestion to add a “portal” that only escorts can access, that will allow us to share contacts of problematic people...that way we can avoid running into the same jokers over and over again. Because those same jokers are likely running the same game on multiple escorts, and we should have some way of knowing to use judgement or avoid seeing a particular person, if another provider said he stood him up as well.

Edited April 2, 2021 by Jarrod_Uncut

[The_Impeccable_G]

You always complain. I would never hire you even if you were the last escort on earth.

[Jamie21]

Right, and in some areas much more than others. I went thru my iPhone blocked list, and it’s long...but it should be 3 times as long as it is lol. I haven’t been blocking enough.

 

But now, I’m going to even go so far as to just block anyone who’s texts and “ghosts” the 1st time. Because I been finding they more likely come back around and do it again at a later time, and I forget how they handled things last time. This week alone I’ve already blocked 3 numbers, all in the same area. It’s exactly why I initially wanted to just freeze my ad until I was ready to go on tour again. Why have an ad up, just to be irritated ??‍♂️ That’s not what I paid for.

 

But I spoke to RentMen, they assured me that soon they may be considering taking my suggestion to add a “portal” that only escorts can access, that will allow us to share contacts of problematic people...that way we can avoid running into the same jokers over and over again. Because those same jokers are likely running the same game on multiple escorts, and we should have some way of knowing to use judgement or avoid seeing a particular person, if another provider said he stood him up as well.

 

Such an escorts only portal exists here in the UK. It is a sort of help resource for escorts & masseurs to share support around things like finding property, health checks, advertising etc.

We also share information on known troublemakers (for example the clients who purposely book you for out calls a long way away with no intention of actually meeting and those who refuse to pay or become abusive). It’s not used for the everyday ‘time wasters’ or just difficult clients because that wouldn’t be practical, but the intention is that persistent serious trouble makers are identified and we can block them or report them to the police if they refuse to pay or are physically threatening. I find it quite a useful resource.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

You always complain. I would never hire you even if you were the last escort on earth.

 

I’m flattered. If I was the last escort on earth, it certainly would be of least concern as to whether you wanted to meet me...considering I’d likely be so busy with other clients who have no other escorts to see ?

 

 

Such an escorts only portal exists here in the UK. It is a sort of help resource for escorts & masseurs to share support around things like finding property, health checks, advertising etc.

We also share information on known troublemakers (for example the clients who purposely book you for out calls a long way away with no intention of actually meeting and those who refuse to pay or become abusive). It’s not used for the everyday ‘time wasters’ or just difficult clients because that wouldn’t be practical, but the intention is that persistent serious trouble makers are identified and we can block them or report them to the police if they refuse to pay or are physically threatening. I find it quite a useful resource.

 

Well that does sound like a good way to go about things. Is it male escort based? I know of a female based site that does that.

 

The suggestion I make is from back when Men4Rent used to have such a feature. It was called review clients feature. Whenever I had an issue with a client, I could see that another provider marked them. Occasionally I’d reach out to the provider and ask them what happened, and they would confirm perhaps something similar

[Jarrod_Uncut]

You always complain. I would never hire you even if you were the last escort on earth.

 

I’m flattered. If I was the last escort on earth, it certainly would be of least concern as to whether you wanted to meet me...considering I’d likely be so busy with other clients who have no other escorts to see ?

 

 

Such an escorts only portal exists here in the UK. It is a sort of help resource for escorts & masseurs to share support around things like finding property, health checks, advertising etc.

We also share information on known troublemakers (for example the clients who purposely book you for out calls a long way away with no intention of actually meeting and those who refuse to pay or become abusive). It’s not used for the everyday ‘time wasters’ or just difficult clients because that wouldn’t be practical, but the intention is that persistent serious trouble makers are identified and we can block them or report them to the police if they refuse to pay or are physically threatening. I find it quite a useful resource.

 

Well that does sound like a good way to go about things. Is it male escort based? I know of a female based site that does that.

 

The suggestion I make is from back when Men4Rent used to have such a feature. It was called review clients feature. Whenever I had an issue with a client, I could see that another provider marked them. Occasionally I’d reach out to the provider and ask them what happened, and they would confirm perhaps something similar

[Jamie21]

I’m flattered. If I was the last escort on earth, it certainly would be of least concern as to whether you wanted to meet me...considering I’d likely be so busy with other clients who have no other escorts to see ?

 

Yes it’s male escort based. It doesn’t review clients as such but it does allow you to share the phone number of any client who regularly books but doesn’t show up, or who is abusive in their session or who doesn’t pay. So it basically allows you to screen out the bad troublemakers.

 

 

 

Well that does sound like a good way to go about things. Is it male escort based? I know of a female based site that does that.

 

The suggestion I make is from back when Men4Rent used to have such a feature. It was called review clients feature. Whenever I had an issue with a client, I could see that another provider marked them. Occasionally I’d reach out to the provider and ask them what happened, and they would confirm perhaps something similar

[Jamie21]

I’m flattered. If I was the last escort on earth, it certainly would be of least concern as to whether you wanted to meet me...considering I’d likely be so busy with other clients who have no other escorts to see ?

 

Yes it’s male escort based. It doesn’t review clients as such but it does allow you to share the phone number of any client who regularly books but doesn’t show up, or who is abusive in their session or who doesn’t pay. So it basically allows you to screen out the bad troublemakers.

 

 

 

Well that does sound like a good way to go about things. Is it male escort based? I know of a female based site that does that.

 

The suggestion I make is from back when Men4Rent used to have such a feature. It was called review clients feature. Whenever I had an issue with a client, I could see that another provider marked them. Occasionally I’d reach out to the provider and ask them what happened, and they would confirm perhaps something similar

[CalTec]

I had one client back out after I replied something along the lines of, "oh, this will be fun! " when I received his photos. Shortly thereafter he replied, "Well if it's fun to you why should I pay? We can just hook up and leave the $$$ out of it then". Like come on...seriously? That's the only time a client sent photos and then backed out.

[HoleTrainer]

I don't care what my clients look like, so when someone sends me pics, I assume that they lack an understanding of the nature of our service relationship. Sometimes this is simply due to being blinded by insecurity and needing to feel assured that they won't experience rejection for their body upon arrival. This is understandable. I don't therefore, simply write everyone off who sends me photos as a time waster. However, many inquiries begin with a confident showoffy photo that is offered as a sort of 'bargaining chip', almost, as mentioned above, like the person messaging me is trying to flirt with me and putting his physical appearance forward as the first indicator of what he has to offer. Again this feels like someone misunderstanding the fundamental nature of our service relationship. I can't pay my bills with your good looks. And although I enjoy my work immensely, that is ultimately what I am making my service publicly available in order to do- pay the bills, save for my future- not to meet attractive men. I tend to see the sending of pics in this type of vibe/context as a clear sign that someone is not a good match for me and usually don't engage much further or try to redirect someone into booking an appointment, which generally kills the inquiry since that's not what they actually want.

[Jamie21]

I don't care what my clients look like, so when someone sends me pics, I assume that they lack an understanding of the nature of our service relationship. Sometimes this is simply due to being blinded by insecurity and needing to feel assured that they won't experience rejection for their body upon arrival. This is understandable. I don't therefore, simply write everyone off who sends me photos as a time waster. However, many inquiries begin with a confident showoffy photo that is offered as a sort of 'bargaining chip', almost, as mentioned above, like the person messaging me is trying to flirt with me and putting his physical appearance forward as the first indicator of what he has to offer. Again this feels like someone misunderstanding the fundamental nature of our service relationship. I can't pay my bills with your good looks. And although I enjoy my work immensely, that is ultimately what I am making my service publicly available in order to do- pay the bills, save for my future- not to meet attractive men. I tend to see the sending of pics in this type of vibe/context as a clear sign that someone is not a good match for me and usually don't engage much further or try to redirect someone into booking an appointment, which generally kills the inquiry since that's not what they actually want.

Well put. I totally agree. In fact I strongly prefer not to see pics before I meet a new client. What they look like is immaterial to my service and doesn’t affect how I am with them when we meet.

 

I do enjoy the surprise of seeing what they look like when they turn up...the person I imagine is often quite different from the person who arrives. It’s fun and exciting to guess what they might be like.

 

I agree it tends to be clients inexperienced at hiring a sex worker who send pics. Maybe they do think they’ll get it free if they’re hot. But I think it’s more often that they’ve got insecurities about their body and so want some affirmation that they’re ok. That’s understandable, and of course they get that positive feedback. But guys; you’re hiring someone for sexual services, they’re a professional, if they’re a good sex worker you’ll never know if they weren’t attracted to you.

[mike carey]

That’s understandable, and of course they get that positive feedback. But guys; you’re hiring someone for sexual services, they’re a professional, if they’re a good sex worker you’ll never know if they weren’t attracted to you.

I don't send photos but I do have an RM account with one non-explicit photo. I do almost invariably make my first approach using the RM chat function, but I don't ask anyone to view my profile, and some I've hired didn't look. At an intellectual level, I know that the ground rules are, or should be as you and @HoleTrainer set out, but from reading these forums it seems that it's not unknown for escorts to operate differently, so I err on the side of telling a prospective hire more rather than less about myself.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

I don't therefore, simply write everyone off who sends me photos as a time waster. However, many inquiries begin with a confident showoffy photo that is offered as a sort of 'bargaining chip', almost, as mentioned above, like the person messaging me is trying to flirt with me and putting his physical appearance forward as the first indicator of what he has to offer.

 

Facts, my man! You really put it in the right perspective. Somehow I hadn’t caught onto how the gesture of sending a pic can be a maneuvering tactic, but it makes clear sense.

 

However, what I can say is even more disenchanting...is the off chance that a “client” browsing a rate-less RentMen could be “imagining” that we are everything but what you specified as it relates to the nature of what we do. I’ve had the occasional person claim (via phone...God forbid, not during or after a meeting) they didn’t know I was for hire. So some of these guys may be disillusioned to believe that we are simply a high end Grindr (and doesn’t help some escorts are using these obvious selfie photos as main profile pics. I’m of the old school that a PROFESSIONAL site should not be plastered with selfie shots.)

 

 

I don't send photos but I do have an RM account with one non-explicit photo. I do almost invariably make my first approach using the RM chat function, but I don't ask anyone to view my profile, and some I've hired didn't look. At an intellectual level, I know that the ground rules are, or should be as you and @HoleTrainer set out, but from reading these forums it seems that it's not unknown for escorts to operate differently, so I err on the side of telling a prospective hire more rather than less about myself.

 

And there’s no harm or foul with that. I actually like to know more about the client, and I also like receiving pics. Just to be clear.

 

But what I am not too hot about, is someone contacting and including a pic of themselves, having a good chat about my sessions and what hotel they’re or I’m at...and then they retreat to, “okay, I’ll let you know”. Which never happens. And then when I call them on it, they come with the tired old “I never made an appointment” line. Well then why the FUNK did you bother sending me pics of you, if you didn’t funking have any intent to make an appointment ??‍♂️.

 

I’ve had more than enough guys do that, and now hearing @HoleTrainer giving his 2 cents...I’m definitely going to not give as much of a time of day thinking, “oh great they sent me a pic, so this is definitely a serious client” ??‍♂️

 

However, I will say exception to every rule: I did have a client send me a couple of pics of himself, one which included his jizz shot. We did end up meeting later that day and....all was exactly as pictured in the end ? So like I say, sending a pic won’t be met with hostility, but if someone is going to do it, do it with genuine intent.

 

Unfortunately, today’s app society makes this hard to do. People are so busy playing gigapet on their iPhones with other men, gay sex has become a gaming app for many. That’s why it’s important to just have a biz setup at the door. Some guys get caught into the rat race of answering every call and text and being “available now” round the clock. It’s just a waste of time. I want quality, not quantity.

[Jamie21]

I don't send photos but I do have an RM account with one non-explicit photo. I do almost invariably make my first approach using the RM chat function, but I don't ask anyone to view my profile, and some I've hired didn't look. At an intellectual level, I know that the ground rules are, or should be as you and @HoleTrainer set out, but from reading these forums it seems that it's not unknown for escorts to operate differently, so I err on the side of telling a prospective hire more rather than less about myself.

Actually you’re right there with putting a non explicit photo of yourself on a profile (or sending it) because I appreciate clients who send a face pic if they’re comfortable with that. I share mine with them if they ask. It humanises things. So that’s the exception...I’ll happily accept a face pic but not a cock close up, a pic of their hole or a nude because those are just not necessary.

Some escorts do want to see them but as I said previously, those guys are doing the work more for their own sexual gratification than to please their clients so the service you’ll get will reflect that motivation.

[DamianQuantas]

Normally when a potential client send me a picture I know they are expecting to get my picture back and it will be just a few more messages until they ask for it. I never send pictures to people that I never met before. I found my pictures in other fake profiles so I only share my pictures with my clients.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

Normally when a potential client send me a picture I know they are expecting to get my picture back and it will be just a few more messages until they ask for it. I never send pictures to people that I never met before. I found my pictures in other fake profiles so I only share my pictures with my clients.

 

Good points.

 

And just a follow up I posted in another thread about "don't waste my time" that someone posted.

 

A "client" who sent me a couple of pics of himself including one of a hard one (and upon further inspection, looks like they could have been 10 years old for all I know). Turned out to be a complete fraud. I played along with his game for a little while, but when I told him I'm parting ways because he #1 hadn't called or answered my calls from his number which seemed odd, he kept wanting me to call his hotel room #2 never cash apped me to confirm the session, and #3 didn't follow up to our supposed appointment yesterday.

 

He got angry and came with a long alibi about this, that and the 3rd. Followed by "fuck you". I didn't even bother. There's some sick mother fuckers out here that live for nothing more than to give illusions. That's exactly why I signed back up for a site that verifies phone numbers. Majority of the time if that number pulls up empty info, it's a phony on the other end. Unless they have a good explanation of why they are using a burner number to schedule me.