KensingtonHomo

I don't mind if a guy shaves a couple of years here and there, especially if they look the part. But 17-18 years is a bit much.

I'm not interested in perfect chiseled physiques, so if we were seeing a provider who increased their rate by $80, we'd decline. If he said it was because he was much fitter, it wouldn't change our decision.

What a nightmare @RadioRob. Thanks for your hard work and perseverance.

Are you sure you're a millennial?

LOL - When I asked him about it, he said he was aiming to refer to Tom of Finland. He is of Irish descent if you're into that sort of thing. I meant "super hot." He has a partner, and also lives up in the Bronx. He wasn't charging $600 when we saw him. This is a side hustle for him and I've noticed some guys who have another gig charge more since it's not their main income.

This was also the mentality among many white ethnic immigrants before and during WWII. The concept of two men forming an equal partnership due to mutual attraction and love is a relatively recent historical phenomenon. While some interesting historical moments predate WWII - mainly in Europe - what we think of as a gay relationship is largely a post-WWII middle-class phenomenon. George Chauncey's Gay New York is a fascinating historical analysis of how the concept of gay identity emerged from the 1890s through the 1940s.

It depends. Usually, guys who refer to themselves as "total tops" or "Dom tops" are less likely to give oral. Guys who are "vers tops" or just "tops" tend to be orally inclined. But we also live in a world where bottoms eat ass, so if it's not indicated, you're better off asking than being disappointed.

There are some in NYC for sure if you ever head this way.

As I've mentioned before, I will do a nominal deposit - no more than $50 - with a new guy. 6 years into this hobby, I've only had one guy fuck me over. So I don't plead. The guy who fucked me over kept wanting to negotiate for more time, which equaled more money. I know myself and I don't want to spend 3 hours with someone I don't know. That said, I wouldn't say that someone telling you they're busy this weekend equals a lack of interest. It's the summer and people are going on vacation, have family and friends visiting, or are taking breaks from work. The guy we're seeing today is leaving on Wednesday for two weeks. We've seen him a few times so we're friendly enough that he will share that. We had a similar thing a few months ago with another guy; but we're still in contact and likely to see him soon.

Since we hire primarily as a couple, we occasionally encounter this issue. For the most part, I don't see how having two people is more work than having one - arguably, it's less. So, generally, if a provider wants to double their fee for a couple, we move on. And I agree with @JamesB that your friend's prior occupation is irrelevant.

Overall, I think you're an attractive guy. That said, I feel like you have to pick a lane. In photos you're giving a pretty masculine aura, but then you have a pink bra on. Sissies, feminine dress, etc., is a definite niche that some gay men love. But it is a niche and not broadly popular. I recommend that you explore what makes YOU feel the most desirable or sexually powerful. Because that will make you attractive to the people who want what you authentically are. If you adopt a persona because you think it's cool now, it will likely read as phony, and that's not attractive.

I think I subscribed to two guys. And, honestly, it was boring AF.

I mentioned this on that other thread. But the one porn “Star” I’ve hired was great and didn’t charge a premium. One of the forest providers we hired has since become a pretty big OF/porn guy. I’m not sure if he sees clients anymore. There are guys I find attractive but I also know that porn is not the same thing as real life. So if I hired Cade Maddox, I doubt he’d live up to his onscreen performances.

I agree with you that some people assume personal limits on luxuries or recreational spending equal an inability to afford them. I've hired guys who were close to $1,000 and haven't felt the experience justified paying more than double the NYC rate (which is already high). I also don't watch a lot of porn and find OnlyFans to be a complete waste of money. So there are maybe two or three guys who do porn that I might pay a premium for. I met with one last fall, a very well-known performer, and he charged me $350 for an hour, which was closer to 90 minutes. I had a fantastic time. What I notice is that a lot of guys are willing to pay a lot of money to be with a porn or OF star. And that doesn't interest me. Now, I would pay more for a premium cabin or a more comfortable seat on a flight. I also haven't seen most of the big music tours lately because though I love Beyonce, I'm not paying $600 for a mediocre seat.

If you go to the Twitter link, it goes to a seemingly new account of a guy named Nikola who also appears on the site. Seems like one guy trying to give the impression that he's a "pimp."

They have some precise language on the site, which states it's not about sex, it's about sensuality massages with licensed therapists. It may be a way to get around the law; e.g. by being this explicit about what is and ISN'T offered, they're keeping to the letter of the law.

Like NYC, Chicago probably has lots of people who think X place "isn't a great neighborhood after dark." They're usually expressing local prejudices, not reality. Assuming you have money for a taxi (and it wouldn't be exorbitant), I kinda think you should have met him.

I haven't seen this much. I suspect it's guys trying to look tough or edgy. It wouldn't bother me if it's just a single photo. I find myself put off by profiles that have no smiling pictures, where every facial expression is like "tough guy" - also ones that have multiple hardcore sex videos. I prefer to leave some stuff to my imagination.

Haven't you guys heard of Viagra? I'm assuming "excitement" means erections here. If so, there's a pill for that. Of course, even viagra requires there to be some desire. If @SometimesBi and his buddy don't have desire for each other, viagra won't work. Now @Thelatin, I see it differently. If closeted men are staying with their wives, I feel bad for the wives who are being lied to and cheated on. I sincerely hope they're not having sex with their husbands as they are potentially being exposed to STIs without their knowledge. That's grotesque and should be the thing that makes you shudder.

I don’t care what an escort does in his private life as long as he fulfills what I want. Also, me and my husband (who is a top) hire together so guys who can really top and bottom in a session are *chef’s kiss.” I’ve seen members here question the masculinity of providers as if there’s some authentic masculinity. There isn’t. It’s all a performance that we learn growing up and some of us then lean more into what feels “natural” to us.

Can we hire you?

I would confirm with him again on Saturday and reiterate what you're looking to do. That way you'll know you're on the same page. With an in-call, you'll be in his space, so that may make you a bit more nervous. Be calm. Politely ask for any reasonable thing you need: water, the bathroom, etc., before you get started. If you have a super specific lube or something, bring it with you. And HAVE FUN!

Did you read what he posted? No, it’s not just eat less; move more. It’s actually very difficult for people who lose significant amounts of weight to keep it off because evolution has primed us to retain fat.

Not only were gay men thinner in the 70s and 80s, the entire country was thinner. Between 1976 and 1980, only 14 percent of Americans were obese. That number was 45 percent by 2018 and is now closer to 50%. Gay men cannot magically avoid a national trend, which is also unique to the US. That change has not been caused by everyone suddenly losing their willpower to diet. Rather, it is the result of agricultural policy (subsidizing corn, the explosion of processed food and sugar-filled drinks) and shifts in work from industrial to service-oriented labor. Further, most Americans, including children, take less exercise and have less free time than we did 40 years ago. As I stated earlier, on average, the percentage of obese gay men is lower, but it's still significant (30-35%), closer to that of heterosexual women, while lesbians and heterosexual men tend to be more obese. So the gap between what the average gay man looks like and the pornified ideal is much wider than it used to be. As with any enormous demographic shift, culture is following it and "bears" and chubby guys appear in much more porn then they used to - and they are more accepted as part of the diverse community that includes muscle guys, jocks, nerds, twinks, daddies, etc. The pressure to look like that ideal has led to a considerable increase in eating disorders among gay men (15% of us versus 3% of straight men). And that's before we get into surgical interventions. I personally have a pretty wide palette (from athletic to runner's build to dadbod to chubby guys) but I generally do not find extremely muscular, 3 percent body fat men attractive; nor do I find morbidly obese men attractive. But understanding the facts of obesity in our country, I do believe everyone deserves respect and kindness regardless of their weight. And that would include not constantly going on about how unattractive they are, nor claiming that an attribute that impacts 30% of a population is a fetish.

I'm not sure what @Rgsnva is referring to. Is it the thread about the scammer? For me, I use a burner number (and recommend others do too). But I've never been threatened and certainly never felt unsafe.