JB_Studio38
-
Posts
2,578 -
Joined
-
Last visited
Content Type
Forums
Donations
News
Events
Gallery
Posts posted by JB_Studio38
-
-
On 3/9/2024 at 1:29 PM, Rod Hagen said:
I've entirely fallen, largely, out of love with NYC, a place I once felt was ideal. Opinions change, feelings sour...and fester...and ooze...and pop 🙂
That’s how I felt about St. Louis…
I had fun here and there, but the past few months have almost been a waste of time to even stay. I left behind 0 true friends and only a couple true regulars. It’s a lot of fake nice, and last week I reached out to a previous client letting him know I was in town available: he tells me “I knows you’re in town, you don’t have to contact me, I’m not available”. Well he’s right, I won’t be contacting him again because I won’t be back anytime soon ✌
-
On 2/9/2024 at 10:21 AM, GenerousGent said:
Everybody charges whatever they can get away with. Basically sites like OF and JFF have liberated organized sex workers. They have steady streams of income and can pick and choose if they even want to do "in person" sex work anymore.
Gay men, generally speaking, have a lot of discretionary income. The boys know it and charge accordingly. If a guy is hot for you, you have to strike in the initial moment. I'd have totally become a sex worker in my youth if I had the resources available to me that exist now.
Trust and believe also, the more a queen can/will pay, the more obnoxious and demanding they probably are. So per usual in the gay "community" the pretty boys are all fucking each other and loving it and the rich gays get the cream of the crop.
Work a day fellas are basically just out of the online gay hiring game now, except for the random street meat you can still find on the ground occasionally. BUT, not every guy can demand $300 and up and make any money. And there are only so many rich guys tricking at any given time. Many are in steady sugar relationships. I'm definitely always looking for the humble, discreet, more rural provider who likes the game and depends more on volume than anything else.
Fuck LA and NYC, both are just out of control and ridiculous, lol. LIfe is much better in the hinterlands. I'd rather put up with a little cold weather a couple months a year and an affordable cost of living year round than deal with the level of narcissism those environments encourage and allow any day. Also, thank goodness I'm old and my sex drive died so I'm rarely even looking any more.
This is all relevant however, even outside of LA and New York, some of the same scenarios are playing out. I notice for example in the Midwest: many ethnic/minorities tend to marry/get involved with White guys who have money instead of escort. I notice it a lot.
As for gay guys with discretionary income: meh. The problem is, many of those don’t want to spend it on sex. Many will play like they don’t have money to give, but then turn around and spend thousands on trips and other things with friends. I’ve said it elsewhere here, but I’ve started to realize selling *** is hard. Not because they don’t want me, but because getting the rate I want…And at a time that is convenient for both.
Regardless, I’m looking for alternatives to the big cities. I don’t want a rural town necessarily because, that’s the position I’m in now and NOBODY wants to pay for it out here. I’m always having to commute to the city. But they always want same day/short notice meets, and I can’t work like that everyday.
-
8 hours ago, Jamie21 said:
The clients offering advice are often doing so from a position of ignorance about the business. Yes they might have hired, but that’s not a qualification to understand what it’s like to be hired. I’ve eaten fabulous meals in restaurants but I wouldn’t profess that that qualifies me to tell the chef how to run their kitchen.
If offered the advice I receive it with grace, and ignore it. I’ll take advice from those who have walked in my shoes.
That’s a perfect analogy (brought famous by Hell’s Kitchen, kitchens nightmares, Gordon Ramsay lol). Even though one may know how they like their meat 🥩 presented (pun intended lol), try doing it around 20 others in rapid succession. Whole other ball game (I’ve also experienced working in the dining industry myself).
Honestly though when I seen it, I almost wanted to block him because I wasn’t interested in what he had to say, considering how he has been with planning appointments.
I’m almost considering no longer working in the same state/city I live anymore. It’s just too many weirdos. Every time I look around, somebody trying to fight and argue and bring drama. If it has to be that bad, why are they even hiring? Idk who they’re angry with but taking it out on sex workers is just bad karma and is going to get them 86’d from the locals.
In the past 4 weeks, I’ve had to simply go to other cities and meet clients. There was no fussing about deposits, they were easy and agreeable, and I didn’t have to fight them (even though I was trying to convey to one that: I’m 3.5 hours away, if you want the appointment TODAY, I need the confirm by such and such time, otherwise it’ll be late.
-
16 hours ago, BenjaminNicholas said:
Amongst a subset of clients, there are what I call 'the savers.' Guys who offer a lot of unsolicited advice in order to 'save' you from making mistakes, running a better business or because they somehow think you can't keep your shit together.
I had a lot of those when I was younger. It was annoying then. It's annoying now.
In knowing people, you know immediately when it's genuine and well-meaning or if it's a power play.
I'm sorry you're dealing with shit like this.
Bravo 👏🏽
And he’s lucky I even responded as professionally as I did because if it was the other way around and I did the same thing to a client, who I didn’t reply to in almost two weeks, they’d probably say: “No. I don’t need your advice, and don’t ever text me at 3 in the morning again!” lol.
People think just because they are well off or feel they have more money than me, that somehow I need to “listen” to them, who hath not the same experience. I don’t even know what advice he was giving me, but at 3 a.m. it didn’t matter because I was sleep and iPhone’s DND 🎧 didn’t wake me up for it either lol
But I must say, this happened to be in the same city that never fails to bring about the weirdest shit in clients. It is just unbelievable. They stay bugging and high maintenance. Reminds me of a song from back in the day:
”You make me want to throw my pager 📟 out the window” lol.
-
On 2/7/2024 at 11:13 PM, BenjaminNicholas said:
The last thing anyone wants is having their personal info put onto a feed that has 100k followers.
But yet, so many do the exact thing that pushes people to do exactly that smh 🤦🏾♂️, example (me in blue):
I’m just ranting but, this is the type of stuff I come across and what I mentioned about “fragile client ego”. It’s so many things wrong with this conversation:#1: why is he texting me at 1 and 3 a.m. with advice unsolicited anyway?
#2: It’s been almost 2 weeks since he replied to my last message, from when he was emailing me trying to figure out where did I go (I went away b/c I got tired of dealing with dweebs like him that proliferate that city’s client market).The audacity of some. It’s crazy how people expect so much positivity out of us, yet some of the main ones keeping up the most drama and animosity be the clients. I’m at peace in my zone, not even in the same city…and he’s harassing me over something I don’t even know what he’s talking about. I haven’t even seen him since January…2 months? 🤦🏾♂️ And this is somebody who on our first (and last) meet paid for an overnight, but I noticed he was going a bit too heavy on the 🚬 and may explain the late night courage.
There needs to be a client review website, otherwise I’m about to come up with a page myself. And Twitter is a good 🎺, but I notice some people get scared off when I post warnings. However, the ones who are legit know better and do their best not to end up on it in the 1st place.
-
On 3/3/2024 at 2:35 AM, newdad said:
Just say no
Good idea. I said the same thing last week when someone reached out asking if I could drive to a town an hour north of a city I was visiting, to see him. But then I asked for a deposit, and he’s like “no I been burned before.” So I said: well no, I can’t see you then.
But guess what? I’ve been burned before too. We’re both taking similar risks, there’s no reason I can think of that I need to shoulder the heavier burden of it by driving out of my way, or when renting rooms to host. Lot of hotels these days, it costs $150/$200 just to use a room for one night, by the time the added “deposit” that the hotel requires is added.
If a client says they aren’t comfortable/don’t feel like sending deposits, they have to consider the upfront stuff we to have to spend to entertain. Clients aren’t the only ones who can get scammed.
If a provider has a standing in-call spot he also lives in, or works for a company that fronts their travel and hotel cost: maybe clients who show up are just a perk and it might not be a big loss if they don’t show up.
In my case, I’m going full time hotel hosting starting this week until I find my next city to move to…so, it’s hardly an option to do without.
-
-
Here’s more deposit literature from another industry:
How to protect your business from no-shows and late cancels | Glowday
WWW.GLOWDAY.COM
Deposits and charging for consultations. These are two aspects of owning and running an aesthetics... -
I’d even go a step further and say: I’m not super familiar with the current state of the restaurant industry but: it def seems they are some of the few places that can get by on this supposed “tight” economy. Most places around town are buzzing for Sunday brunch, dinner, etc.
Meanwhile I feel escort stuff is lagging. Even if there’s clients hiring, there’s still a lot of guys to choose from: and me and a client advisor were just having a discussion tonight, it’s more than what seems sustainable.
I’m considering setting my sights on culinary, but I seen the nitty gritty working at restaurants (watching stuff like Hell’s Kitchen and kitchen nightmares are good examples lol). It seems safer to be an escort than a flight attendant, and less abuse than working at a restaurant. My clients would never get away with the language Gordon Ramsay uses 👋🏽 😂
-
1 minute ago, samhexum said:
Separately or together? If it's together, is that considered a kink? Who would be hiring? Do they target their ad to that specific clientele? Is there enough of a market?
Never having had the $ to afford to hire, there is so much I do not know about the industry...
Wait, you’ve never been able to hire a provider before? I mean I guess sex work does cover both in person and cam work but…okay.
And by grandmother, I mean “many”, obviously not their actual grandmother 😂
-
1 hour ago, samhexum said:
I think you'd find that everywhere.
If you move because you can't make $ where you are, it's a shame you wouldn't be able to deduct your moving expenses if you pay taxes.
Well in my case, there is no moving expenses because from the start I kept it light. All I brung fits in my vehicle, everything else is just the furnishings that were already at the place.
As for it being everywhere, that is true but: considering it’s the highest in the nation is alarming. Just goes to show because almost every time I name a rate, it’s a discussion about affordability. Some places can be obliterated by price increases. I’ve said it before about Denver: I used to make a decent bank in the 2010s era, when prices went up steeply: business got slower and slower and eventually died out. Now, every dude and his grandmother is trying to do escorting and it’s no longer viable to me. Seen the same thing in Nashville, except Nashville is almost surpassing Denver in terms of wealth and development due to its becoming the next “Beverly hills of the South” (move over Atlanta lol)
This is why I’m leaning towards becoming either a $500+ provider or stick with $150 as a baseline because: $250/$300 may be doable for some but still out of range for most. So at the lower price, it’s no guarantee volume is going to go up.
My last two bookings have been $500, and even though things have been slow coming out of February (from my research, is a slow month for some in the industry, especially if you’re not in snowbird central e.g. Palm Springs, Florida or Arizona).. At least with each booking I was able to get what I needed to have done. If I did the same bookings for just $150 or even $200, it would not be the same.
-
And then here’s an article that further elaborates..
St. Louis and Missouri have some of the largest rent increases in the nation
WWW.STLPR.ORG
New data from a rental company shows Missouri had the biggest increase in the median price of rent. Other...They charging more for everything out here, but biz has gotten less and less. I feel this area is rigged to keep sex workers poor lol. People expect you to always have a place ready to host, but then don’t want to pay the rate asked. Almost like having to be confined to only charge $200 or less 🤦🏾♂️
-
4 hours ago, BenjaminNicholas said:
I have so many questions.
Is there a Red Lobster crustacean lounge somewhere for you high elites?
Are you invited to see them catch, process and freeze their stone crab?
During the Darden days, would you look down on Olive Garden diners who didn't have an elite program?
Do you get the least-sad looking live lobster in the tank?
I kid, I kid.
But seriously, Midwesterners love seafood, but often have spotty access to it which is why RL does well in middle America. It's not great fish, but it's often times all a city/town has.
RL was very, very savvy in where they built their locations.
Craziest place I went to a RL was Bismarck, ND. It was also packed lol. I almost didn’t think it would be real anything but, pretty much all seafood no matter where you go, is frozen to a degree. I know there’s some places that fly theirs in fresh, but that may only be certain items and like once a week.
I know for sure lobster and crab always has to either be immediately frozen or immediately boiled, and they usually come from Maine, The Gulf/Keys or Alaska anyway. Wisconsin has some local owned places that specialize in Walleye, but even that is frozen at some point.
As for the elite status lol, it’s not necessarily out of this world but…I been getting a lot of free appetizers and desserts and it takes less time to get it.
The other grab about RL is their margaritas and drink promos. A nice glass of Chardonnay for $5 isn’t bad, but I got hit with $19 for a glass of Kendall Jackson at one seafood place. I was 😳 that’s MORE than the cost of the actual bottle.
As much as I love eating out, the sticker shock at some of these places is off the charts. So places like RL I can at least go in knowing what to expect.
-
I just have to clarify (brief discussion elsewhere) that the above text exchange was not a conversation I had lol. This was from another website from another person who had that exchange.
It was more just to highlight the fact that: sometimes people throw the word “scam” around loosely, but there’s always 2 sides to a story. No one got scammed in the situation, it sounded like a miscommunication and unwillingness to compromise on the client’s part. However many times people will bring up having been scammed/burned before without actually elaborating how.
I know IF it were me in that exchange, I would not be thrilled if someone showed up 45 minutes early.
-
Specifically referring to Saint Louis area. The person I’ve been staying part time when I’m not in Kansas City is “downsizing” and handing the townhouse back to the owner: but I’ve decided I don’t want to remain because biz has taken a nose dive 🛬 over the past few months. On top of that, most every place in the city and surrounding has raised rents. It’s disgusting. It’s barely any biz going around, yet the hotels and apartments are wanting much more than they were asking just a few years ago.
I actually had more from using apps this week, than I have from RentMen. But those were done at much lower prices and, I had to entice them offline…
I like that it’s central to many cities in the east (eastern time is only 2.5 hours away) and the south (Nashville/Memphis) and north (Chicago/Milwaukee) and not too far from the west (two crossroads that lead to the west).
Only thing is: when I’m here lately, I’m finding myself always wanting to go to a different city. I remember years ago, I used to travel thru St. Louis whenever I went between Denver and everywhere else East, and I never got much hits even then. It was always something where somebody wanted me to host, and before I was asking for deposits: I have on a couple occasions gotten hotel rooms and their person I expected: didn’t show up. So the idea of staying doesn’t seem appealing.
That said: I’m looking to start touring again going into Spring by returning to visit cities where I did good in last year and the year prior. I’m just unsure whether rates may be a factor, but I know in the area I reside: RentMasseur in particular here, people seem to only want to do $150/$200. And idk what the hell with RentMen but, the month of February I only had 2 actual clients from the site between 3 cities.
Seems like all they want to do on there is ask to unlock private pics and send messages on messenger to engage, instead of just following thru. I’m hoping an updated auto reply with more detailed info, will help cut down on the BS.
- soloyo215 and pubic_assistance
-
1
-
1
-
Self professed fan of red lobster 🦞 here 👍🏾 lol. I’m already platinum this year, though I think it’s more year to date.
I know some don’t like it but, I will say: not all locations are the same and it depends what you get. I’ve been to red lobster everywhere from the east to west coast. Some have been great, others: like in areas that aren’t really prime on tourism, or the people don’t seem to be into sea/lake food: aren’t.
There’s also a $20 snow crab platter that I found to actually be quite good. Went with some friends up north over the holidays. Pound of crab legs over potatos. Also there’s a few items on the “classic” menu including rainbow trout that are very delectable.
Now as someone from Florida who has lived close to many a seafood restaurant: I understand it’s not the Ocean Prime or Oceanaire. But, unfortunately unless it’s restaurant week…it’s not something I can always make room for my wallet. I’ve also gone to Landrys, McCormicks, Pappadeux and legal seafood, all great places. But when you want a broad menu of seafood in the Midwest under $35, red lobster just hits the spot. Just like Pizza Hut, Fast food, and Starbucks does for some.
Last red lobster I’ve went to last week: The place was packed full of people. This is despite one location in town having closed. So you wouldn’t think people in the Midwest liked seafood so much. However, I’m not so much a fan of busy times at restaurants and will actively avoid those periods of 6-8 a.m. I used to work at Shells seafood in Tampa years ago…it gets hectic.
- cany10011, MikeBiDude, Luv2play and 1 other
-
4
-
1 hour ago, marylander1940 said:
this should be a drama free hobby.
In a perfect world right? But…when is it ever? I’ve posted many a text conversation and it’s plain to see: dealing with men who might not be single, or even gay…ALWAYS leads to drama. It’s either their wife, their work, their money, etc etc. it’s never drama free. That’s both sides of the equation. Just have to act accordingly or move on when necessary.
1 hour ago, keroscenefire said:His excuse is that he was in a remote part of Colorado and didn't have cell service. There are some parts like that, but that doesn't explain him not contating me during the week when he got caught up in "work stuff."
I agree, the moving on is happening......
I always thought even the ski resorts have WiFi, but there have been times I’ve gone to remote areas of Montana and had no service when hiking…but by the time I got to the little town, I was able to check messages.And just a reminder: Denver is very flaky, I told myself I will not go to book visits there again. It used to be great, until the pot industry took over. There’s still some good apples but, lots of weeding thru flakes.
- Johnrom and + keroscenefire
-
1
-
1
-
Hmm, meh 🫤 just sounds like typical iffy hookup app behavior. It shouldn’t be an issue to plan in advance with some notice.
However, you’d be right to say that same day meets do seem like the new planning ahead. In fact, I’m almost considering…in an effort to be a little more flexible, reserve deposits only for same day bookings. But then, that leaves advanced bookings open to cancel (which could even have a bigger negative effect if I’m out of town or planning to travel somewhere) so, I can’t think of enough reason that one or the other is more or less reliable than that other.
As much as I want to move to a “no same day appointments” that would in theory making scheduling as easy as knowing what your work schedule is: I already know that’s mostly Fantasy. Pretty much every new client wants same day bookings.
Fortunently I try to adjust my life and schedule to accommodate such requests, but for the most part: I’m usually only doing 1 same day booking in a day…so nobody get comfortable thinking that’s the solution. Many same day appointments, I have to say no to.
-
On 2/29/2024 at 2:02 PM, Jamie21 said:
Some clients are just notoriously vague. I think it comes with the work. I don’t like it, it’s frustrating, I agree with @Jarrod_Uncut . Some clients are just window shopping or indulging themselves in an ‘I might hire’ fantasy.
I tend to work from a studio in central London. I don’t live there but I’m often in the vicinity and I see clients there or at their hotel or home if it’s reasonable travel distance. Many times I finish my day, make my way home or to do something else and a potential client will message “hi, are you available this evening?”. Too late…I left the studio. Had they asked earlier I’d have probably seen them.
Others message about availability in coming week. I provide days / times and hear nothing back. Then they message on the day and ask to book. Too late! I made other plans or took another booking because they didn’t take their opportunity when it was there.
What do these potential clients think I’m doing? Sitting around all day waiting for them to make their mind up? I’m sorry to have to decline them of course, but I do think that if you want a good experience with someone decent then it’s highly unlikely they’ll be available for you at the drop of a hat.
Good point made. This is where I also wish the RM platforms were a bit more expressive about availabilities and such. “Available now” is just not always doable, even though “online now” I suppose is a compromise.
I know the auto reply on messenger is about the best it gets when it comes to being able to explain availability.
But fast forward: I dealt with this EXACT same scenario again couple days ago. I went to a city for 1 night only, but I was giving myself until about 6 pm the next day for any other clients to book. So in the meantime, I went to Starbucks, shopping and to the gym.
Sure enough, one client was dragging things on for a bit…eventually couldn’t even end up meeting himself. Another was going to be an hour away. Granted, this was all on A4A: the same site where people take their sweet time anyway. Some people, you can only deal with in a capacity where you have nowhere else to be.
-
-
6 hours ago, nycman said:
Boise? What choice do I have? You could look like my Uncle Phil and I’d probably still fuck you.
You’d be surprised by 2 things:
#1, Boise actually has a developing gay scene, I would almost consider moving there myself because it’s one city that’s not become over saturated live Denver and Phoenix western cities have become. And it’s a scenic trip to Seattle and the PNW. It’s still a bit “frontier-ish” but, I actually went on a nice date with a black brotha last time I was out there. Who woulda thought, in Boise of all places lol.
#2, from my experience, I would almost assume Uncle Phil has a big dick. I know a guy who looks like the younger version of him…and even my biggest bottom friend, can’t handle his 🍆 😆
- marylander1940 and BonVivant
-
1
-
1
-
12 hours ago, keroscenefire said:
At a certain point, you can't be too paranoid to do this hobby.
Exactly, because what if the tables were turned:
Escort doesn’t show face
Doesn’t provide phone number
Doesn’t host
Only takes cash (meaning all the guys who don’t have access to ATM need to leave and get atm money late at night)
Basically doesn’t even include a picture of himself at all, just a promise to show up (sound familiar?)
I’m thinking of doing an alternative to deposits by just asking for a picture. But some people I know, won’t even do that. But of course that barely matters either because I’m pretty sure either they won’t or, it’ll be something explicit with no face.
-
11 hours ago, BostonDadType said:
@Jarrod_UncutOne again the way you are ranting and raving over this subject, points to why you're struggling in this business. I've said it before and I'll say it again, if your posts on here in any way reflect the way you communicate and treat potential clients, then it's no wonder clients ghost you or stand you up.
I would rather address the other guys who replied, but I’m going to still address you:
You seem to ignore or are just ignorant to the fact that: some of the things I discuss are a cause and effect situation.
I know it sounds easy and convenient to use my posts as a reason for everything…but you have to think bigger than that. Just like I said about deposits, I wasn’t asking for them because things were always going great, I started asking only when weird things kept happening.
What I post on here has nothing to do with someone contacting me trying to book a visit in a different city, and him beating around the bush despite me letting him know: I need to know soon.
Now alternatively the other day: a client reached out and even though it was a same day delivery booking in a city 3.5 hours from me(faster than Amazon lol), he reached out early in the day and sent deposit as soon as possible. We met and had a great time.
The other guy coulda worked out to, but then when he’s already showing distrust over my deposit which proves he hasn’t read my ad: my patience automatically got shorter.
-
So, looking around the “universe”, I think it’s stuff like this that makes some clients say stuff like, “I been burned before”. Same thing a potential client said to me yesterday, but he asked me to drive an hour north of town to see him on an outcall, but didn’t want to send a deposit. I was like nah, I’m not about to do that. Anyhow, popcorn 🍿 (not me, from another post elsewhere in the world)
and then…
followed by…
And then these be the same guys claiming they got scammed, SMH 🤦🏾♂️
Do you follow or ignore Auto-Reply directions on RentMen messenger?
in Questions About Hiring
Posted · Edited by Jarrod_Uncut
So this is the response that goes out each time I get a response on RM messenger. But what do some do? Start having a mini conversation with the auto responder, and don’t text as instructed. I’m asking for a very specific way to contact, and leaving my number and link to my website at the end.
Someone did the exact same thing yesterday, and I didn’t even notice it until the next day because I was busy anyway with plans. But the kicker was, the time he offered was simply: “asap” in a city that’s listed in my nearby travels and is 3.5 hours away; which I don’t offer same day appointments in generally.
I’m finding it seems RM messenger guys might be hesitant or avoidant to give out their number. Idk why but, I would not meet anyone off solely the app unless they arranged a deposit and picture and even then, they would likely have to exchange their number unless it’s email only.
I feel if someone is going to treat the booking process like it’s un-important, how are they going to turn out during the actual meet 🤔