Mydavid

I knew that you meant longer. I haven't had to increase the frequency with which I trim and/or shave, so my observations do not correlate with yours. The same goes for the hair on my head; I often get a #1 or cut-throat shave back and sides, and I do not need to have my hair cut with greater frequency to maintain the same length.

Junior, I'm sorry you encountered that man, but don't let a year-and-a-half's worth of positive experience be undone by one loser.
 
Sad to say, I'm sure almost all of us -- whatever business we're in -- have lost revenue to dishonest and disrespectful clients. It happens no matter how hard you try, no matter how fair-minded and accommodating you are. The important thing is to never ever let those experiences compromise your own ethics or values. That loser has to live with being him. You can feel good about who you are.
 
It speaks well of you that you are grounded enough to vent and then, pretty quickly thereafter, post again and say, "I think I'm officially over it and officially going to sleep."
 
P.S. I'm glad there's another current thread in which you've been singled out for high praise. It's a nice offset to this bad experience to know that you are seriously appreciated. All the best to you!

Basically in truce mode and holding. No further discussion of the events or what may happen in the future. I'm going counseling alone and it's pretty difficult and painful. At this point my counselor thinks that we both have far too much invested in our time together to call it quits over this. She also thinks mentioning the fact that I'm hiring would further complicate matters. And to my surprise, she completely supports my hiring. She thinks I'm getting both the physical and emotional support missing from my marriage and thinks that it's important to continue that. The trick is to discreetly balance the two and to not become too dependent on an escort for those things.
 
At this point I'm not sure what I'm going to do, and will retreat to my burrow with my bottle of gin to think it out.

If shaving made pubic/body hair grow faster, I would be one big bush by now.

Let me be clear, it sucks what happened to you. You obviously have to do whatever works best for you and protect yourself. However, I would caution that one bad experience does not necessarily dictate changing your business practices and that you should never make such important decisions when you are possibly still emotional from the effects of such a show of disrespect and theft. Consider also that you are likely to lose a lot more than $60 in business from clients who will not hire escorts who demand payment upfront (some from their own experiences of being ripped off) or from lost gratuities. Other methods, such as counting payments from first time clients with payments after service, might be a more workable option.. but again proceed on making changes to what has been working for you for so long based on one bad experience with caution.

What's interesting is that Asians as a whole here in America(just my observation, and CERTAINLY not a racist statement- as I ADORE asians and go out of my way to hit Asia twice a year- they love light hair light eyes and I love dark hair dark eyes too, so it's a good fit...), tend to be very conservative and family oriented. The other business I'm involved in(exotic dancing agency)- has been around 12 years and I have never ONCE had a male dancer applicant who was Asian....twink OR bodybuilder. Had two females who worked for me, and they were outstanding and HARD workers...but for whatever reason no males could come to grips with it? I dunno! It could have been a 'shame/shun' thing from the stigma of being in the adult industry and the fact that most Asian families really stress education and going forward and bettering yourself, and would probably consider this beneath them..?

I don't know many Asians well, but most appear to be very into family. A lot of what whites take for granted in the way of personal autonomy doesn't even seem available to Asians because family obligations are felt so keenly.
 
I know one young Asian guy pretty well from my gym - American-born Chinese. His parents are foreign-born and he lives with them. He's about 20 years old and we talk all the time mostly about working out, but really about anything. He asks me for advice all the time - on fitness and working out, about his career, etc. He could be gay, but I'm not sure. He's working at muscling out - doing lots of squats and deadlifts - it's giving him a nice perky bubble butt which I am fascinated by.

Not surprising. I sent him an e-mail. Told him he got busted. Exposed as a phony. Stealing the on-line photos of a US model. lol.
Oh well.
 
Bozo

I agree. Shaving your pubes, makes me feel like a child molester. It's disgusting. I can't even get hard, it's so unappealing to me. Total turn off.

Shaved. Hardwood floors are cleaner than shag carpet.

It happened again last night here in Austin. At 7:00 p.m. I get a "Hi" from a Grinder subscriber who purports to be 25. My profile reads that I am 54, so I am intrigued but not fooled. I ask have you read my profile. He responds with something suggesting that he has. I send him a recent photo, still he remains. He sends me a photo, and sure enough, its the photo of a 25 year old. I ask provocative questions, he responds with short answers but no questions of his own. I get blatant about what I like in the sack. Still he remains. He asks if he may come over. Duh. He may. Then...the shoe drops. We talked about the scope and scale of my "generosity". Then he came over, and he was 25-ish and did what we discussed, and it was terrific.

But will you ever be able to walk again normally?
 

resurrecting this thread to give a brief report on my first visit to the Nob Hill in San Francisco......
 
located only two short blocks from the priceless real estate of Nob Hill (what a difference a very short walk down the hill makes), I found the place to be small, clean, and friendly....I asked how it all works and the helpful, casual desk guy told me all about it.....$20 entry for both the theater and downstairs arcade.....$15, I think, for just the arcade....(prices may vary)....the staff also told me I could leave the premises for a drink or whatever and return without an extra charge (check for a stamp or ticket)....it was a Monday eve and the entire place was very quiet.....I asked about the recent death of the "owner" and the desk guy told me he had been "part-owner", implying things would go on as normal.....I had a daypack with me and I was able to keep it with me, but they offered to hold it if I wanted
 
solo dancers perform for 30-minute sets in the small theater, then a new guy comes on.....I was the only person in the theater area and entered to find a well-built guy stroking his hard-on on stage, disco lights ablaze.....ostensibly, the 30-minute sets are meant to be about ten minutes of stage show and about 20 minutes of mingling in the "crowd" for privates and tips.....but the dancers seem to have free rein over how they manage their time.....all was very casual.....the theater being empty except for me, this first guy with the hard-on pretty quickly came down to my seat and showed off, letting me paw all over.....I tipped him about $10 or $15 for several minutes of private time.....the same routine continued for me through several dudes' sets and other customers came and went, as did I......they apparently very much rely on tips and the liberal nudity/privates policy here seems well worth it compared to other North American clubs with the ubiquitous $20/song policy.....if the theater is busy (with patrons), you may have to make solid eye-contact with the dancer as he mingles (if you want a private)...no privacy in the theater, but there are a couple rows with extra legroom so you don't have to have the dancer squeeze uncomfortably between you and the row in front.....guys' attitudes and allowances varied, but all was very fun and exceedingly casual.....tip these guys!!
 
the downstairs arcade, accessible by going back into the "lobby" from the theater to the stairs, is primarily a cruise-y area, it seems....several video booths, glory holes inside some of them, and dudes walking around.....not being a cruising kinda guy, I dutifully averted my eyes!.....there is also a very dark "Underground" area down there (themed after the London Underground) that one is free to walk through and see what's going on.....nothing much was going on at all, though there were more guys here than in the theater....I presume things get pretty hot down there on busy nights.....as always, be polite and respectful....move between the theater and arcade as you wish
 
there is a Naked Night on Tuesdays for customers and other weekly/monthly events....check the website
 
also, there are fairly regular weekend sex shows in the theater (Fri and Sat eves) for a slightly higher fee, often featuring well-known adult-video actors.....the desk staff told me the theater can get fairly full for those (about 80 seats in the theater).....website is not always updated for the regular daily theater performers, but staff said the sex shows are well-marked on the website......
 
http://thenobhilltheatre.com/

Yeah...that IS pretty "old fashioned". I grew up in the sexual revolution, not the 1950s. Fuck first, and ask questions later. ha ! ( No ..not really...but sex is definitely part of getting to know someone, in MY world). Even my mother, apparently sampled the goods, before she married my father.

When I first started escorting, I turned to the Google™ to get tips and whatnot. The websites I came across were for female escorts and suggested all levels of precautions and session management (video cameras, work address for client, background checks, even an alarm clock!).
 
Of course, being a complete n00b, I didn't realize there's a difference between escorting in the straight world vs. gay world until I found this forum. It's like night and day. Some of the tips that were emphasized as essential for female escorts were complete deal breakers for male clients. I felt so bad for my first client once I realized the error in my ways. Luckily, I found this forum right after my first session, and apparently my client didn't know better either because he hired me a few days later. I'm glad because the second time around, I made up for my first time fumble and even spent extra time with him.

First, I would like to say that I am extremely grateful for all of the advice, guidance and support I've received from many of you in this forum. It has been helpful, and appreciated more than I can express. I now find myself in a very distressing situation and really need some thoughts on what to do and where to go from here. I truly agonized over posting this for fear of being eaten alive in a public forum, but I have absolutely no other outlet to discuss this particular problem. My posts are now under a new screen name since I discovered Google links back to posts on this forum
 
I've been in a relationship with a man for the past 36 years, married for the past 6. There was a very healthy and active sex life until 7 years ago. It stopped dead, with all discussions ending with, "we're too old..." and the tongue in cheek suggestion of "go find a boy to play with." For 6 of those years, I resisted the hookup sites and apps. It didn't feel right getting into a relationship of any sort with someone I might find on them. I have used them to chat with people about movies, music and photography, but drew the line at that. Last year I discovered hiring. In my mind hiring didn't present a problem or, at least to me, constitute cheating - there are ground rules and the relationship doesn't progress beyond them when hiring.
 
Last month I took the plunge and booked a weekend with someone. Two weeks prior, I went through STI testing and received the results (negative) through my online patient portal. Little did I know that the HMO would also mail the results to my home. As bad luck would have it, they were intercepted. Based on that there was an inspection of my "weekend away" suitcase, where several well hidden items (condoms, douche, etc.) were discovered. Nothing was mentioned until a few nights ago when it all came to a boil. He believes I spent the weekend with someone I met on Grindr. He would be absolutely livid if he knew the truth about my companion.
 
I've been asked to leave, relinquish ownership of my dogs, and there's a promise of a very acrimonious divorce which will leave me with very little at the end. The thought of having to start a brand new life at my age is absolutely terrifying.
 
I believe I have 2 to 3 choices. One is to try to make amends and live a life devoid of sex. One is to make amends and continue to hire on the extreme down low. The last is to walk away and try my best to make a new life - under this choice, my ability to hire, among other things, would most likely be negatively impacted. There is another choice, but it involves a bridge and the icy Hudson - I haven't quite hit that point yet.
 
I'd appreciate any thoughts, advice, words of wisdom, anything really. Please spare me any negative comments or public flaying. It's embarrassing enough for me to post this, and it wouldn't be helpful and would only make me feel worse than I already do.
 
Thanks, and Happy Holidays

I wouldn't be interested in someone long term if there was ZERO sexual connection. So I slept with everyone who I've met on SeekingArrangement.com after our first date.

CLEARLY ! The only dates I've ever been on, that did not end in sex were in High School and with girls...and even with most of them, I got laid. I would point out that any beautiful woman, who's dating a successful business man is putting out on a regular basis in an effort to win the grand prize. No one brings home an escort to meet their mom.

Rule of thumb: Trim the bushes out front, and completely remove anything out back.

Once place that I danced wanted us shaved including the legs. I hated that! If it felt nice for a day (debatable) it was miserable when it grew back. I challenged it and trimmed close and got away with it. This was a long time ago. I still like to trim close all over. That reminds me I want to do my chest.

The older I get the more I like a little hair. Even on the young skinny guys I think it looks better. I personally think pubic hair helps accentuate the penis. Maybe a special bear night at the strip club?

Trimmed close. I like this both on myself and whoever I'm with.

I like to get razor burn on my face, so just enough stubble to get me in trouble.