Getting Ripped Off By A Client

[JuniorNYC]

I'll get over this but I am so incredibly saddened about what has just happened to me. A client, who had been texting me for the past 2-3 days to meet up finally decides he wants to meet up tonight. The ETA starts getting later and later, until finally he gets here a little past 11:30PM. Mind you, I'm usually in bed by midnight because I have a full time job which is my main priority. I was very nice and accommodating the entire time. Anyway, he shows up and seems like a nice guy and all. I won't get into details, but I will say the encounter was a little more difficult for me than usual. There were a number of things that turned me off when usually I find more things that turn me on about a client the more we talk and the more intimate we get. He ended up staying a little past the hour, and as he left he put the money on my dresser and said goodbye. This was one of those rare encounters for me where at the end of it, it felt like a lot of work. It wasn't as effortless as practically all my other encounters and I was a bit exhausted from it. A few minutes later, after he had already left, I counted the money and noticed he stiffed me by $60! This has never happened to me before, and I'm really upset by it.

 

I'm not really asking for advice (or maybe I am), probably more just venting here, but I will say two things; (1) I'm so fortunate that after doing this for a little over a year and half, this is the first time this has happened, and (2) I feel incredibly used - I feel like it might be a little over reactive of me to say I even feel like I've been raped in some way, but, yea, it kind of does feel like that. Part of me wants to find some sort of way to seek revenge but really what good would that do? I can't write a bad review or blast his number out in a giant escort newsletter anyway. I have to suck it up and move on. But now I'm wondering if I should change my approach with how I receive money in the future. I avoid having the encounter feel like a transaction, and usually discussions about my rate, etc. last a couple seconds - a simple confirmation - and the subject changes. I confirmed my rate with this guy a couple times via text. I didn't ask for the money upfront because, well, that just not how I do things. But now I'm left with the question, should I let this encounter change my protocol, or should I just suck it up, learn how to screen these guys out and continue with what seems to have been working great up until this point?

 

Luckily the night before I had an amazing encounter with a client, and we connected really well - plus he tipped me generously. Anyway, I don't know what I'm really asking, but if you've gone this far, thanks for reading and sorry for babbling on. If anyone has any advice or a joke to lighten up a bad experience, thank you in advance. I guess the way I've been receiving cash (asking at the end, and not the beginning) does put me at risk for this to happen, and perhaps it was just my time. It also wasn't THAT much money... It still sucks though! Alright, well this has already been helpful and it's way past my bedtime. Goodnight!

Edited February 23, 2017 by JuniorNYC

[BabyBoomer]

Hey guys... I know we're not supposed to review people here - and I almost feel funny reviewing JuniorNYC at all - because - he was THAT good. He was so good that to review him feels like it turns it into a regular escort experience - when it was - not. Everything that you've read here about him is true. And then some. He brought humanity with the heat. If you're looking for more details PM me.

 

Focus on the positive.

 

~ Boomer ~

[JuniorNYC]

Details about how you "got screwed in the end" should be in another forum!

 

Maybe the client didn't realize the shortage, so you shouldn't hesitate to contact them and let it be known. If no reply, you know who to not see again.

 

Since this was a first time incident, don't let it deter you from seeing others. As you pointed out, someone prior was generous so perhaps it evens out.

LOL - thanks. I sent him a couple text messages, and it's been about 2 hours now with not response. You are right about it evening out - but I still feel shitty that someone would do that.

 

Focus on the positive.

 

~ Boomer ~

<3 That brought a big smile to my face. Meh - shit happens. Too many amazing encounters to be grateful for. I think I'm officially over it and officially going to sleep! Thanks!

[mike carey]

Junior, it's sad and disappointing that this has happened to you. As this is the first time anything like it has happened in over a year of escorting, the incident is about this client, not about your business model. I won't say move on, because even one such incident can leave a bad taste in your mouth. As Smurof suggested, the client may not have realised that he shorted you, but that's likely giving him too much credit (and he did screw you around in the lead-up to the meeting). All that, and the fact that the meeting seemed like hard work, seems to be telling you he's not a client you would want to repeat. Accentuate the positive!

[+ Eric Hassan]

Like @mike carey said, this incident is about the client and not you. You don't have to take it personally. I have a friend who says that sometimes, you literally pay for your life lessons. Think of this as a $60 lesson that sometimes you'll get stiffed and that you don't need to see this client again. You don't need to do anything differently moving forward but now you know it could happen. Big hugs to you!

[Andy2]

Junior, what the client did was deeply unjust. If he has not texted you back, it seems likely he shorted you out of spite (he was unhappy with you or the session), but that is no excuse if you look like your pix and made a good effort. (We all have experiences where the chemistry does not work well, but the client should still make full payment, so long as the escort is not misrepresenting himself.)

 

You might be tempted to demand payment upfront, but please avoid that: Clients (like me) consider that a big red flag, and many legitimate clients will avoid you. It is also awkward to count the money in front of the client, but if you can do so discreetly (client is washing up) or right after he leaves that gives you some protection, yes?

 

Sympathetically, Andy2

[down_to_business]

Let me be clear, it sucks what happened to you. You obviously have to do whatever works best for you and protect yourself. However, I would caution that one bad experience does not necessarily dictate changing your business practices and that you should never make such important decisions when you are possibly still emotional from the effects of such a show of disrespect and theft. Consider also that you are likely to lose a lot more than $60 in business from clients who will not hire escorts who demand payment upfront (some from their own experiences of being ripped off) or from lost gratuities. Other methods, such as counting payments from first time clients with payments after service, might be a more workable option.. but again proceed on making changes to what has been working for you for so long based on one bad experience with caution.

Edited February 23, 2017 by down_to_business

[Whitman]

Junior, I'm sorry you encountered that man, but don't let a year-and-a-half's worth of positive experience be undone by one loser.

 

Sad to say, I'm sure almost all of us -- whatever business we're in -- have lost revenue to dishonest and disrespectful clients. It happens no matter how hard you try, no matter how fair-minded and accommodating you are. The important thing is to never ever let those experiences compromise your own ethics or values. That loser has to live with being him. You can feel good about who you are.

 

It speaks well of you that you are grounded enough to vent and then, pretty quickly thereafter, post again and say, "I think I'm officially over it and officially going to sleep."

 

P.S. I'm glad there's another current thread in which you've been singled out for high praise. It's a nice offset to this bad experience to know that you are seriously appreciated. All the best to you!

[+ Kufrol]

At the risk of sounding cavalier, karma will eventually catch up to him. Venting is healthy, especially in a forum such as this one.

[TopTierTop]

I totally agree with what is being said about not adjusting your business model based on one (or even a few) bad apples. I would be upset at first too, if it happened to me. But I try to look at the net benefit I enjoy from this enterprise, and if I am getting what I want out of it or seeing the overall results I am hoping for, I would consider that type of occurance just a cost of doing business.

[MassageDrew]

Well that sucks. Sorry that you got stiffed. When I hire a masseur or an escort I usually make sure they count the money or I count the money in front of them. It is somewhat awkward but I want to make sure he's paid his dues and then some ;-)

 

I think for future appointments you should tell clients that you can only take them an hour past the original one if he's running late. Just say you have another appointment in a couple of hours after you appt with him. Then don't book him again. LOL

[MartyB]

You sound like a great escort. That client is an "asshole". He knew what he was doing. I think that most clients are respectful and appreciate his escort. Like anything else in life you will meet jerks. I can say that not all of my experiences with escorts have been great. Some have been shit. But I learned and moved on. My one recommendation in this business trust your instincts with clients. That's what I use for choosing an escort after years of doing this. It works.

[AdamSmith]

Focus, like NORAD does, on your Distant Early Warning Line, and cut Trouble off at the source!

 

That is NOT to say tamp risk down to zero before you even get out of bed. We all navigate oceans of worthwhile risk every day.

 

But tune your sensors to pick up on users and pathological personalities immediately, and tell them Good-bye.

[+ José Soplanucas]

I'll get over this but I am so incredibly saddened about what has just happened to me. A client, who had been texting me for the past 2-3 days to meet up finally decides he wants to meet up tonight. The ETA starts getting later and later, until finally he gets here a little past 11:30PM. Mind you, I'm usually in bed by midnight because I have a full time job which is my main priority. I was very nice and accommodating the entire time. Anyway, he shows up and seems like a nice guy and all. I won't get into details, but I will say the encounter was a little more difficult for me than usual. There were a number of things that turned me off when usually I find more things that turn me on about a client the more we talk and the more intimate we get. He ended up staying a little past the hour, and as he left he put the money on my dresser and said goodbye. This was one of those rare encounters for me where at the end of it, it felt like a lot of work. It wasn't as effortless as practically all my other encounters and I was a bit exhausted from it. A few minutes later, after he had already left, I counted the money and noticed he stiffed me by $60! This has never happened to me before, and I'm really upset by it.

 

I'm not really asking for advice (or maybe I am), probably more just venting here, but I will say two things; (1) I'm so fortunate that after doing this for a little over a year and half, this is the first time this has happened, and (2) I feel incredibly used - I feel like it might be a little over reactive of me to say I even feel like I've been raped in some way, but, yea, it kind of does feel like that. Part of me wants to find some sort of way to seek revenge but really what good would that do? I can't write a bad review or blast his number out in a giant escort newsletter anyway. I have to suck it up and move on. But now I'm wondering if I should change my approach with how I receive money in the future. I avoid having the encounter feel like a transaction, and usually discussions about my rate, etc. last a couple seconds - a simple confirmation - and the subject changes. I confirmed my rate with this guy a couple times via text. I didn't ask for the money upfront because, well, that just not how I do things. But now I'm left with the question, should I let this encounter change my protocol, or should I just suck it up, learn how to screen these guys out and continue with what seems to have been working great up until this point?

 

Luckily the night before I had an amazing encounter with a client, and we connected really well - plus he tipped me generously. Anyway, I don't know what I'm really asking, but if you've gone this far, thanks for reading and sorry for babbling on. If anyone has any advice or a joke to lighten up a bad experience, thank you in advance. I guess the way I've been receiving cash (asking at the end, and not the beginning) does put me at risk for this to happen, and perhaps it was just my time. It also wasn't THAT much money... It still sucks though! Alright, well this has already been helpful and it's way past my bedtime. Goodnight!

 

I'm very sorry you had to go through that.

Said that, now that I know you do not count the cash, I would like to make an appointment.

[marylander1940]

I'll get over this but I am so incredibly saddened about what has just happened to me. A client, who had been texting me for the past 2-3 days to meet up finally decides he wants to meet up tonight. The ETA starts getting later and later, until finally he gets here a little past 11:30PM. Mind you, I'm usually in bed by midnight because I have a full time job which is my main priority. I was very nice and accommodating the entire time. Anyway, he shows up and seems like a nice guy and all. I won't get into details, but I will say the encounter was a little more difficult for me than usual. There were a number of things that turned me off when usually I find more things that turn me on about a client the more we talk and the more intimate we get. He ended up staying a little past the hour, and as he left he put the money on my dresser and said goodbye. This was one of those rare encounters for me where at the end of it, it felt like a lot of work. It wasn't as effortless as practically all my other encounters and I was a bit exhausted from it. A few minutes later, after he had already left, I counted the money and noticed he stiffed me by $60! This has never happened to me before, and I'm really upset by it.

 

I'm not really asking for advice (or maybe I am), probably more just venting here, but I will say two things; (1) I'm so fortunate that after doing this for a little over a year and half, this is the first time this has happened, and (2) I feel incredibly used - I feel like it might be a little over reactive of me to say I even feel like I've been raped in some way, but, yea, it kind of does feel like that. Part of me wants to find some sort of way to seek revenge but really what good would that do? I can't write a bad review or blast his number out in a giant escort newsletter anyway. I have to suck it up and move on. But now I'm wondering if I should change my approach with how I receive money in the future. I avoid having the encounter feel like a transaction, and usually discussions about my rate, etc. last a couple seconds - a simple confirmation - and the subject changes. I confirmed my rate with this guy a couple times via text. I didn't ask for the money upfront because, well, that just not how I do things. But now I'm left with the question, should I let this encounter change my protocol, or should I just suck it up, learn how to screen these guys out and continue with what seems to have been working great up until this point?

 

Luckily the night before I had an amazing encounter with a client, and we connected really well - plus he tipped me generously. Anyway, I don't know what I'm really asking, but if you've gone this far, thanks for reading and sorry for babbling on. If anyone has any advice or a joke to lighten up a bad experience, thank you in advance. I guess the way I've been receiving cash (asking at the end, and not the beginning) does put me at risk for this to happen, and perhaps it was just my time. It also wasn't THAT much money... It still sucks though! Alright, well this has already been helpful and it's way past my bedtime. Goodnight!

 

I sent you a PM about this.

[AdamSmith]

I sent you a PM about this.

One is, after all these years on the analyst's couch, curious why one would feel a need to publicly post about a private message exchange.

[marylander1940]

One is, after all these years on the analyst's couch, curious why one would feel a need to publicly post about a private message exchange.

 

and why do you advertise it even more...?

 

I'm glad you're finally brave enough to point such a socially awkward behavior.

Edited February 24, 2017 by marylander1940

[BSR]

If he has not texted you back, it seems likely he shorted you out of spite (he was unhappy with you or the session)

Or maybe this (ex-)client is just a cheap selfish f*ckface. My theory is that assholes sh*t on other people if they think they can get away with it. Would this client go into a convenience store and try to steal $60 from the register? Probably not because with the witness plus security cameras, there's a good chance he'd get caught. But he had no problem stealing $60 from you (shorting your fee by $60 is flat-out theft in my book) because he knew he could walk out the door before you realized you'd been shorted. Even if you counted the money right away, he could just pretend to be mortified about his "innocent" mistake, no big deal.

 

They say that we are so quick to see in others what is true of ourselves. If so, then this ex-client trusts no one because he's a lying, cheating sack of sh*t and assumes the same of everybody around him. Karma has already caught up to this asshole because any person who trusts absolutely nobody lives an awfully lonely life.

[AdamSmith]

and why do you advertise it even more...?

 

You have a line in front of me to be analyzed by you.

 

one more thing I wonder why someone hijacks a thread just for the fun of it.

Are you agreeing, or telling me to go to hell?

 

Forgive my genuine incomprehension.

Edited February 24, 2017 by AdamSmith

[marylander1940]

Focus, like NORAD does, on your Distant Early Warning Line, and cut Trouble off at the source!

 

That is NOT to say tamp risk down to zero before you even get out of bed. We all navigate oceans of worthwhile risk every day.

 

But tune your sensors to pick up on users and pathological personalities immediately, and tell them Good-bye.

 

Escorts aren't clairvoyant to know if a guy will be happy after the encounter or if they're "bad hombres".

 

You have to take chances in life.

 

There was a similar thread about this subject a long time ago.

 

https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/the-case-of-the-missing-money.98009/

[marylander1940]

Are you agreeing, or telling me to go to hell?

 

Forgive my genuine incomprehensciensce.

 

I won't cooperate moving this thread out of subject, after all I already told @JuniorNYC what to do by PM...

 

Oops I did it again.

[+ Kufrol]

Or maybe this (ex-)client is just a cheap selfish f*ckface. My theory is that assholes sh*t on other people if they think they can get away with it. Would this client go into a convenience store and try to steal $60 from the register? Probably not because with the witness plus security cameras, there's a good chance he'd get caught. But he had no problem stealing $60 from you (shorting your fee by $60 is flat-out theft in my book) because he knew he could walk out the door before you realized you'd been shorted. Even if you counted the money right away, he could just pretend to be mortified about his "innocent" mistake, no big deal.

 

They say that we are so quick to see in others what is true of ourselves. If so, then this ex-client trusts no one because he's a lying, cheating sack of sh*t and assumes the same of everybody around him. Karma has already caught up to this asshole because any person who trusts absolutely nobody lives an awfully lonely life.

Wow!

[MikeyGMin]

Or maybe this (ex-)client is just a cheap selfish f*ckface. My theory is that assholes sh*t on other people if they think they can get away with it. Would this client go into a convenience store and try to steal $60 from the register? Probably not because with the witness plus security cameras, there's a good chance he'd get caught. But he had no problem stealing $60 from you (shorting your fee by $60 is flat-out theft in my book) because he knew he could walk out the door before you realized you'd been shorted. Even if you counted the money right away, he could just pretend to be mortified about his "innocent" mistake, no big deal.

 

They say that we are so quick to see in others what is true of ourselves. If so, then this ex-client trusts no one because he's a lying, cheating sack of sh*t and assumes the same of everybody around him. Karma has already caught up to this asshole because any person who trusts absolutely nobody lives an awfully lonely life.

I always get a chuckle about how much I agree with you outside of the politics forum. Over there, virtually everything you say is wrong but over here, I think we could actually get along. I guess beautiful men will eclipse politics every time.

[mike carey]

'They say that we are so quick to see in others what is true of ourselves.'

A perceptive comment indeed!

[+ OliverSaks]

Re: Karma: from a blog of one of my favorite Buddhist "masters" - Brad Warner, whose book "Hardcore Zen" I would highly recommend. (He spends some time on karma in the book, but here is a bit from his blog below"

 

"I've been seeing a lot of nonsense about karma regarding the recent disasters in Japan. There's a webpage going around that supposedly lists dozens of Facebook status updates saying the earthquake and tsunami were karmic retribution for the attack on Pearl Harbor. Now

is saying it was some kind of message from God. Pat Robertson has apparently learned his lesson and is keeping mum about what he thinks.

 

The people who post these things about karma haven't got a clue in the world. I've said it before and I'll say it again, you cannot ever know someone else's karma. You can't even figure out your own.

 

I've often talked about how I can see karma operating in my own life. When I say that I am not referencing things like natural disasters and so-called "acts of God." I'm talking about how, when I act out of anger, angry action seems to come back to me, often from sources other than the object of my original anger. Same with greed, jealousy and all the rest. I am not talking about things like, I dunno, a bucket of soup falling on my head from a third floor window after I stole a copy of Penthouse from the newsstand or whatever. Get those kinds of ideas out of your heads, people!"

 

Annoying to get shorted, sorry it happened to you Junior, but I think ya'll could maybe think about karma in a more personally productive and less "violent" way.

 

-0S