MscleLovr

I’ve no wish to be unkind but there were numerous warnings posted by several men (including me) on the various occasions that you gushed about your new (now ex-)boyfriend. Certainly, there are younger men who are interested in a relationship with an older man. The drivers may be socio-economic and cultural. Over the years, I’ve met and had relationships with young Italians (2x), Spaniards (2x) Brazilians (3x) Argentine (1x) and Englishmen (3x) - and none were escorts. Some young men prize stability and maturity; they seek a mentor or just someone who will listen to them and take them and their problems seriously. Of course @Unicorn you may have to accept that the relationship won’t last for ever, and the young man may value you for the size of your wallet rather than the size of your cock. But you may have more luck if you accept that these relationships can be lots of fun as well as deeply satisfying if you go into them without thinking you’ve found the “one”. FWIW I’m now more than 5 years into an intense relationship with my much-younger boyfriend. I was certainly wary in the beginning: I worried about the age-gap for the first year we were together, and then I relaxed, as I’ve never really cared what others think. Also I was careful and gradual about financial matters, but after 2 years I offered him a platinum AmEx card that I would pay - he refused it. He enjoys making his own way in the world. Of course, I pay for our vacations etc but he enjoys taking me out to dinner (and paying) regularly. I am very lucky that - after a lot of looking - I found a thoroughly nice young man who likes me. I’ve no idea how long it will last. I simply try to enjoy the time we have together.

+1

Definitely only a bromance. Matt (the guy in gray shorts on the left) is gay-friendly but recently married a woman and they just had a Baby. What a terrible waste of a body!

You mean that fit, ripped muscleboys when they’re almost naked in the gym and locker-room don’t take selfies in NYC? I’m shocked @BaronArtz, truly shocked. How can Instagram survive?

I very much doubt that you would. Back then, you were so head-over-heels in lust/love that you might well have ignored any warning. And your handyman would have put himself in an impossible position if he had voiced his suspicion. Hindsight is a wonderful thing. We can only hope to live and learn from our experiences.

Very well put @MikeBiDude. I agree: hoteliers have seen it all.

I’m so glad you enjoyed it @edjames. Have the reviews been published yet?

I know this must be a very emotional time for you @Unicorn but I’d like to feel you were viewing the outcome positively and looking to the future. I also hope you’ve had that syphilis test you talked about. I don’t think he’s a sociopath. The truth is much simpler: he’s a young man in an expensive city in a foreign country, trying to better himself. He saw you and X as well-off older men who would and did take good care of him and helped pay his bills Yes, you must accept this. You had a great time together and the sex/lust turned your head. It was foolish of you to gush to your co-workers and show them photos of him. Stop thinking about him and move on. This sets off alarm bells for me. FWIW I have a friend in London, a successful banker, who was physically abused by his (5 years younger) friend. Remarkably the younger man went to the Police with some spurious allegations, but they soon uncovered the truth. The Police were extremely kind and helpful to my friend in urging him to move on. They also gave him a lot of practical advice, including to get rid of all the younger man’s possessions - set a time/date for him to collect everything and warn they will be put outside if he doesn’t show up; in no circumstances allow him back into the house; and get rid of anything (purchases on trips together, photos etc) that remind you of him. I urge you to have a similar clear-out @Unicorn. You can and will rebuild your life, and I hope you will meet a nice man.

Well, it’s a man’s duty to make sure he feeds his guy regularly. A millennial needs a good daily intake of healthy protein.

I agree @tennisjock. He’s a nice, fit-looking young man, and with his ears slightly protruding you’d have something to grip while he’s orally pleasuring you.

Thrifty. I have some dietary constraints and I prefer to eat smaller, more frequent meals, so I do the same when travelling.

You may have to wait a little while @Bucky as @Unicorn last related that he planned to speak to the ex next Monday and to take Tuesday as vacation hoping that the ex leaves that day.

As a former client, I’ve had two occasions where the young escort insisted on picking up the check for dinner. In each case I’d had several dates with the young man before this happened. I appreciated the gesture, and perhaps it was to signal that a continuing relationship would be welcome.

Of course, the manager will check first that the two guys are happy to work together, and you may have to spell out what you want. It occurs to me, however, that one or both of the guys may be reluctant to do certain things in the presence of the other, whereas if it’s one-on-one and seemingly ‘private’ each may do those acts readily.

I wonder which came first: that he has “blowjob lips” or that he’s given so many blowjobs ;-)

Maybe I’m misinterpreting what you wrote but I disagree @marylander1940. I think it’s assumed that any older single man, heterosexual or gay, will pay for dinner etc. on a first date. Maybe people will split the check on later occasions, but it’s still a date. When I was single, I had many first dates with guys in their 20s (actors/models), 30s (professional jobs) and 40s (business owners/professional jobs). I always paid the check but I noticed the occasions were rare when a guy offered to pay half. Not all of my first dates ended in the bedroom. FWIW I had 2 strange experiences while dating. 1. The first was a tall model, very easy on the eye, whom I took to dinner 3x. Our third date was convivial and he told me of a recent date he’d had (with a second-tier movie star who was “lousy in bed”). So after dinner I suggested he come home with me to finish the evening well - he declined, made an excuse and I never contacted him again. 2. The second was a very attractive trainee-doctor with whom I had a great first date. As I reached for the check, he grabbed it and offered to pay. I insisted that I pay as I’d invited him, but said he could pay next time. He called the next day to fix the second date; we had another good time together and he paid for dinner. And now it’s more than 5 years that we’ve been together.

What a great torso! I wonder why he felt he had to hide his face. Had some nice older man taken him on vacation to a coastal resort?

If you’re in a big city - I’m thinking of Manhattan or London - in the early stages of dating, you’d be spending at least $2500 a month on entertainment (dinners, drinks, theatre, movies etc). Weekend trips and vacations would obviously cost extra. If the relationship develops, it helps enormously if you can house the guy in an extra bedroom and bathroom in your apartment/house. Otherwise, you'd have to reckon on an extra $2500-3000 a month to help with housing costs and some allowance for clothes etc. Overall, I guess you’d need at least $5000-6000 a month free (from after-tax income or capital) to spend on your Prince Charming (or the equivalent of @bigjoey’s Matthew) I enjoy the company of fit-bodied, goodlooking young men so I never minded spending this sort of money. I viewed it as helping them make their way in the world, and of course it provided me with a great social life and entertainment.

Sorry to learn of your experience @Aaron James. For my part, I like the site for the simple reason that I had great success with SA and found my ideal guy in London. I do feel that any man who’s looking for his counterpart has to be persistent and use the site for longer than a “couple (of) months”. I think I kissed quite a lot of frogs for almost a year before I met my guy.

Thanks for the update @Unicorn. The one part that I take issue with is where you state I think it would be a major mistake to leave him in your home while you’re away for so long. You are assuming that the other man X is also finished with your ex and will keep quiet. If X is jealous of you or isn’t finished with him, X may inform him of your intended action so that he gets “sole custody”. Or if X is finished with him but feeling vengeful, he may have told your ex that he’s informed you and his ‘good life’ will end soon. You also wrote about your ex that “ he never stole anything from my house”. That’s unsurprising: you paid all his expenses. People do strange things when their lies and deceptions are exposed. Once your ex senses or knows that the end is coming, he may be inclined to take some valuable things away with him. I strongly urge you to change your plans to be away and to act at once. Then at least, this will be over and done with; you will be able to move on.

I’m sorry to read this @Unicorn. It’s always painful when love goes sour and you discover you’ve been used by your lover. If I may offer you some gratuitous advice: 1. You say you’re away at a conference in Chicago. Don’t say anything to him yet. Cut short your attendance and fly home unexpectedly to throw him out of your house. If there are uninvited guests in your home, call the police. 2. Make sure you are present while he is packing and clearing out. Ensure any valuables, especially small and portable ones, do not end up in his cases. 3. If he knows where you keep your important possessions or the combination to any safe in the house, check your possessions first and change the combination immediately. 4. Get a locksmith immediately afterwards to change all your locks and change the security alarm codes. 5. Yes, get tested just in case. That way, you will be sure you’re healthy. 6. Consider ‘getting back in the saddle’ soon...perhaps with a paid companion. FWIW I don’t think he’s “a sociopath”. You were kind and generous, and he simply took advantage of you. You’re not wrong to be open and loving; you just need to find a guy that deserves you. Please don’t listen to any excuses he makes nor to any promises that he’ll be “good” in the future. In a way, you’re lucky you found out his true nature before the wedding

I guess you must like very tall men @GTMike. I’ve seen him out and about. The photos are consistent with how he looks IRL. I’ve no knowledge of his companionship skills.

Have you tried learning to fly a glider instead?

As I get older, it all takes longer... 1. I eat very well (no fast food), drink lots of water daily (no sugary beverages) and drink wine moderately, and exercise each day. 2. I enjoy time in the sun but moisturise well before and after exposure to the sun 3. I emphasise personal grooming and I dress smartly in formal clothes, even to go grocery shopping

Very true @SirBIllybob The last (male strippers for men) club I knew of in London closed about 18 years ago.