MrMattBig

Um, how about simply replacing "gay men" with "people"? Last I checked, one either likes to cook or they don't, but it has nothing to do with what gender you sleep with.

There are a lot of gay stereotypes out there, those that have any validity don't apply broadly. I'm gay and I like to cook. That said, it's easy to default to applying them without intending any judgment, it's just a bit lazy. For those who don't want to cook, either at all or once in a while, the government here is telling people to buy take-away food.

[MEDIA=twitter]1248755210673164288[/MEDIA]

As I've mentioned before, one element of the government's wage support is directed at helping those businesses stay open.

I am indifferent about cooking currently. I can cook, just not stove top rice. ?But that side has to be pulled out of me. Definitely can cook a mean breakfast tho, especially after a night full of working up an appetite ?

I'm out in California. We instituted social distancing or lockdown or whatever you want to call it only about 48 hrs after New York did; yet our known rate and our death rate are vastly lower. Earlier infection from China? More spread out lifestyle? The data's not in yet; but I believe (Los Angeles Mayor move yesterday to extend until mid May notwithstanding) that California in general would be safe to move back towards 'normal' by the end of this month (April).

Any knowledge of how Hollywood Blvd was mid March? To my knowledge DC, Chicago, and LA too started talking about closing bars and restaurants at the early start of closures and that idea started to spread. I know NYC followed at least a day or two after DC in dining room/bar closures, as I traveled between both cities at that time. I was shocked seeing Spiderman and a few others still trying to get pictures taken around Times Square while I was there. Makes me wonder about the LA equivalent on the Walk of Fame

Can someone please explain to me what "pandering" is and why it's something that merits an arrest?

It can vary from state to state but essentially it means to facilitate the act of prostitution.

Thank politics whether in the civil election form or office corporation politics. Don't want to get this thread moved but just want to point out shit like this happens all the time, but especially on a 4 year cycle to pad resumes and accolades to move up, get positions, get clout, etc. If there were no pandemic, I am sure there would be many more stories like this across the country.

In California a few years back they finally changed the law or passed another one, not sure about the specifics...but so law enforcement could not use anymore the mere presence of condoms in a woman's (or any gender but specifically brought up as a concern against women) bag as corroborating evidence in a prostitution charge.

Nothing like a combination session but there are extremely few providers. If you look for a masseur who would give a massage then escort, they say look at escort ads. If you look for an escort for a massage and escort session, he says look for a masseur. This isn't about trying to get an escort session at a reduced price; it's about finding a provider willing to offer both.

You would probably be in the minority for the last part....I have had others say they want a erotic massage mutual touch mutual oral and rimming. Then balk when I tell them my rate of 240 for an hour, then when I ask what they were expecting they say 160. If you want more than mutual touch and a handjob better to get someone who will do the more (escort). Some escorts will say look for a masseur for two reasons most likely. One the client opens with asking what are you rates for massage. That implies they are expecting to pay those associated rates. This is how I view that question. If they were to say what are your rates for an hour or 90 minutes? Looking for erotic massage etc. I personally would be less skeptical. Second reason would be they don't want a bad review and disappointment based on their amateur massage skills even though everything else was steamy.

I personally love starting with a massage first and teasing their hole and balls while stroking my cock...but don't expect an hour massage and don't expect therapist level skills.

Since starting this thread another poster above helped inspire a response I will use now on to try and get expectations clear across the board so we can move on to that steamy fun.

But I’m not comparing big risk/little risk. I’m comparing actions as a whole. You just said I shouldn’t be having meets if I’m not having these conversations.

 

I’m saying people are having these conversations, but it means nothing as far as hookups are concerned. I never ask someone if they are negative, last been tested, or “clean”. Means nothing. They could have been tested today, fucked someone on the way to me, and give me something. Instead, I will check them and I will check myself. And I get tested.

Which would be the big risk and which would be the little risk?

That’ll mean as much as an application between 2 men about to have bareback sex:

 

When have you last been tested?

Do you wear condoms often?

Are you Negative?

 

Great, based on your response, you’ve been approved! Let’s fuck ?

Again, that comparison is not valid because of the lack of existence of a medication to fight off Covid.?‍♂️

I was really hearing you out, up until this part...it still insinuates a guy having sex lacks self restraint and is careless. It still puts them as being “at fault” and labels them “sex addicts”. Do you know that my last 2 clients haven’t had sex in a long time?

 

Going back to the bartender and drunk driver. Bartender serves a drink, someone ends up dead. But it’s not because of the bartender serving a drink. The same bartender may have sold drinks to many people who arrived home just fine. He can’t be to blame for the one who ran a red light.

 

In this case, it’s not the gay guy wanting to have sex who’s the blame. It’s the ones who manifested this....I’ll stop there because it’s going to get political and I don’t want to quote nothing that I can’t back up with references. But, I will reference this article which I think is helpful in defining the whole social distancing issue:

 

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/conditions-and-diseases/coronavirus/coronavirus-social-distancing-and-self-quarantine?amp=true

 

I am going to try and stream line my pint of view again for both sides. Yes, two consenting adults.

Yes, abundance of sanitary/disinfecting precautions. Yes, we all need to stay the fuck home. Yes, it's part of our moral responsibility to slow the spread. Yes, your intimate connection could potentially kill the other person in days to weeks.

contrary to the STD/hiv comparison, there is no current medication to prevent infection leading to death, and may even be compounded by a lack of ventilators soon.

Here's the thing. At this point of time, conversation logistics to meet should be way more than available, rate, location, eta. All parties should be having conversations about how often the go out, when they last traveled out of town etc. Unless all parties can have a responsible detailed conversation about social distancing and isolation habits....you have no business trying to have sex/massage with someone else right now.

Admittedly, I have speed read your post recent posts. So I might be mistaken, but the closest I have seen you be to stating you are having these conversations with someone is when you acknowledged knowing the other person hasn't had sex in a while. You can take all the precautions and make all the validations. But I hope you are analyzing the social distancing behavior of others in some way to help eliminate some risky clients, just the same as your use cancelation fees to help eliminate game playing clients.

So what you’re saying is, all the people out of work right now...should have had an exit strategy or back up plan as well?

 

Every person I know is out of work right now, except for factory/industrial type workers. I met a guy the other day who is a wedding planner. He saved over $300,000 in 10 years. He’s out of work and all his biz is being moved.

 

People I know who have had 2 and 3 jobs are also out of work. I don’t consider myself “stuck” in the business. I consider myself grateful to be able to still have a demand that’s not determined by an employer or an order pertaining to large groups of people.

 

It’s nothing about being stuck, it’s just any other day for me. I have dues, I have responsibilities, and I can’t allow myself to get into bind by closing shop.

 

Society right now has not taken into consideration the fact that there’s many people who were quasi-homeless prior to this situation. Where do people think all the people who lived in their car, or lived on the road traveling most of the month, or had no “permanent” address? Did they just vanish into thin air? Or are hotels opening their doors with free rooms and food to help those who are in need? Not so.

 

People need to realize you can’t plan for everything. Hind-sighting at guys who use escorting as their sole and reliable income, is a false sense of security. When I was in the hospital for 5 days last month, the only people who helped me out were 3 clients. 1 came to visit, 2 sent deposits for future sessions. If I were working a “side” job, I may or may not have even gotten sick pay, since this has been an issue even prior to COVID.

 

I don’t consider relying on escorting to be a disadvantage. I feel it’s a valuable resource I’d like to hang on to for as long as I’m able to.

I think stuck refers most to only having a certain field as a job prospect, and not having a secondary option when for whatever reason that option is involuntarily taken away. I have lamented before during your absence that the lack of accrued paid time off and a structured raise system across numerous jobs, especially entry level, is atrocious. There are system problems and overlooking of issues for sure. Those things an individual does not have direct control over. What we can have the most control over individually is fundamentally what we do for work.

People are just:eek:

The following event is why I don't necessarily pass judgement on those who want to still meet up, if a conversation can happen first, somewhat like dating, about the risks and precautions etc first while not being disillusioned of the facts (I am still on a break myself tho)

So, I have my window open, enjoying the nice vegas weather, listening to music and going through traveling expenses for filing taxes, my desk right under the window and my two gorgeous kitties are sun bathing in the window...and what happens? This male human is walking his dog on the sidewalk right in front of my window and hawks back a loogey and spits right in front of my window! Luckily my window to the sidewalk is about 6 feet away, but I closed my window immediately and typed this.

?!?!$%#%!#^#! people sometimes are just:eek:

I wish we weren't in quarantine times so I could better suss out how this version of BP will turn out

One of my favorite providers is still advertising and listing upcoming travel to various cities. He is not seeing anyone but is advising people who contact him to stay safe and saving their contact information so he can reach out to them in the future when he hopes to resume travel and work.

This is exactly why RM should adopt more of what Backpage used to do. You would pay for your ad to be visible per city. I have thought of doing just what you stated above, but fearful some would blacklist me for posting travel dates as @lonely_john mentioned. Designating myself as available while in safe mode and posting a travel date related to my home city on here I feel is an already big risk of misconception about currently taking appointments.

Like the Earth's magnetic field every half million years or so...

 

Apologies - wannabe science nerd here

Give yourself credit upwards to amateur at least, most wouldn't even know that fact?

Based on the title of the thread: “Is Coronavirus impacting your business”, it would only be expected to get varied replies. If everyone said, “I’m quitting and not seeing anyone”, it would be no point in having the thread on going.

 

I gave a pretty concise narrative of my experience and cited other articles as well. All I’m saying is, the mass hysteria on-going doesn’t erase what’s already been happening all along. Awhile back, before this outbreak even surfaced, I posted on social media about how I carry sanitizing wipes, sprays and bleach when I travel. I had gotten tired of getting sick almost everytime I traveled and stayed in a hotel.

It's all about tone. Your tone, despite the complete validation of your sanitary precautions and already constant risks in grocery stores, paints the picture of slight desperation of continuing on because you have to. That's obviously the reality, and quite frankly the reality for myself as well and other sex workers who do not have regular civilian jobs that they can continue with. But the verbalizing of that won't sit well with most. One would argue go digital and offer digital content. I myself am self conscious on cam/video, and don't have a following on those platforms or on social media to make that really viable. So what did I do? I have had a few Skype shows with those that have asked that I have already done before and felt comfortable doing so.

And then I posted a travel post on here, advertising special rates for prepaying a meeting in the future, as well as put it on my website. Admittedly, only regulars really have responded to that. But I have covered my expenses this month by doing all that.

Without a shred of negative ire.

Truth of the matter is, there always have and always will be diseases and viruses manifesting themselves, as this list from 2003 shows (which was around the height of the gay hookup and escort sites debuting such as rentboy, adam4adam and men4rent:

 

 

 

It’s nothing new. I don’t think now is the time to point the finger at anyone, who is doing what they can to get thru this. Part of the reason I came into this profession, is because I didn’t have to be concerned with being let go like other jobs I’ve had in the past. And as we can see now, a lot of people have been let go thru no doing of their own.

 

I know a lot of people going thru tough times, but when those unemployment checks come out, lot of people will be handling their bills. And not everybody is out of work. People are also still going to stores to buy essentials. Think about it: how much of a risk am I posing to see 2 or 3 clients a week, than to go to a store and cross a couple dozen people, who are also crossing a couple dozen people, who are also crossing a couple dozen people? After all, new research seems to point that one can spread it by talking or just coughing and the virus stays in the air for 6 minutes:

 

https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.cnn.com/cnn/2020/04/02/health/aerosol-coronavirus-spread-white-house-letter/index.html

 

 

In my case, I can’t allow myself get down to $0. I have 2 vehicles that regularly need maintenance, and I can’t allow my insurance to lapse. That’s illegal. And I don’t live walking distance to anything nor are their buses/public transportation in the town I’m in an hour outside of Kansas City. I also am not living in my own place, so to stay in and allow myself to be depleted financially would essentially put a strain (no pun intended) on my housemates, because then I’d be bugging them for money in the process.

 

I know the government is doing what they can now, but it’s not going to be a permanent solution. At some point, it’s going to have to give.

 

I also am not being medically defiant either and am no stranger to a hospital bed: I have asthma, and I spent 5 days in the hospital earlier this month due to non-COVID related issues. I stayed Inside in a room for 5 days, and when I finished my treatment, I left. So I’ve already been thru it. I know what it’s like to have respiratory issues. If someone I meet contracts COVID, they could have likely got it from elsewhere.

That's a simplistic and totally naïve EXCUSE, and I don't buy it.... You have no care or compassion for others. It seems that this is ONLY about you ? With over 200,000 projected deaths in the US, you are shameful, and I hope someone reports you, sorry !

I made a case in another thread about a scenario of two people hooking up and responsibly quarantining both before and after, and having a mature conversation about accepting the constant risk and consequences of making the other I'll and potentially those close around them. One thing I hope to be able to practice more in the future as a career of advising escorts on PR issues and client interactions, because the thing is this:

After having such a controversial history on this forum, is it really the best practice to come back on here and announce, to summarize, "hey I am still seeing clients and won't stop doing so because I need to, even during this health crisis where we are advised to stay and home and limit interactions with others, for our own safety and theirs"?

We can debate forever the decision to actually do so, like I have said before, your risks are your risks, but they should be informed and take into the account the morality of the impact of those around you. But from a PR aspect this is a shitty decision to announce it on here.

EDC finally postponed till Oct 2-4

What I'm about to present is simply an observation. It is NOT in ANYWAY a political statement or a value judgment.

 

Over the last fifteen to twenty years here in California our governors and our state legislators have made a very strong, and successful, effort to eliminate the use of free plastic grocery bags given out by the markets. The intent was to protect the environment from all the waste plastic. I have unfortunately noticed that during this period, of increased use of re-usable grocery bags, the conditions of those bags has deteriorated badly -- they have become more and more frequently soiled and dirty. Now we are being told NOT to use our re-usable grocery bags as they may be contaminated with the virus. Some markets chains will not even allow customers to enter their stores with these re-usable bags. Just returned from one of my local markets where I encountered a woman who was furious because she had to return to her car to leave her re-usable bag.

 

I also find it interesting that the elected Lord Mayor of London asked all those, who could, to avoid using the city’s tube system. He wanted the ridership to be limited to those who absolutely had to come into central London. A number of years ago the London city government, to limit the congestion and parking problem in central London, placed a rather pricy tax on all car owners using their cars to come into the central city. The tax was quite successful in decreasing the number of cars coming into the city while greatly increasing the ridership on the city’s tube system. When people followed his plea to avoid using the tube system and the trains became half empty he cut the number of trains operating. This decreased in the number of trains caused major delay in the system and created crowding again on the trains. His response was to blame construction workers who were using the system even though the government had recommended the continuation of construction projection in the city.

 

Damn life is interesting even in these difficult times.

Here in Vegas we don't have a bank on plastic bags yet. I don't know about others, but as it's just myself I used the plastic grocery bags as garbage bags, and haven't bought regular garage bags in over a year. In regards to the plastic straw ban in California, I have only seen one fast food place use paper straws once. So plastic straws are continuously put into the public under unregulated disposal (littering), while at bars one would pay for an expensive drink only to potentially have the flavor impacted by the paper straw, while all garbage would be disposed of still properly by staff and garbage collection services.

I do not usually have a difficult time coping. Life is hard and mine has been easier than most. But today, I have just hit the wall. Working in a New Jersey Hospital is not nearly as difficult right now as working in a NYC Hospital. We have most equipment. We have beds. We have staff. We have patients and each day we have more and more patients. Right now the numbers are not overwhelming but they are increasing and more and more compromises are being made. Most of the staff are just doing their job. But there is an air of anxiety and trepidation hanging around every corner. There are hollowed shells walking the halls. Fear and uncertainty is everywhere. There are no laughs not even at jokes with a dark humor,

I went into work today and started the day as part of a physician conference call. The conference call was to inform us that the governor has given physicians immunity. This is not being widely publicized. Essentially, within the scope of good medical practice, we cannot be be sued for actions that previously would have been not only malpractice but quite possibly criminal. That is, we were informed of the plans for the upcoming ventilator shortage. It is not first come first served as it is in the toilet paper aisle. There is no hoarding or buying for a friend, When the respirators are 90% in use, which is the case in several hospitals in New Jersey, then patients are assigned a color code. Green patients are those that get to keep the respirators. Yellow are the patients about whom clinical status and general condition are favorable. Red are the patients that are first in line to have their respirators removed should others in higher categories need them. Blue, well blue never get the respirator from the onset.

I could barely contain my anger, fear, frustration, and utter disappointment. We knew this was coming, I knew it was coming but now it is here and it is a palpable real pain, physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. We were given guidelines as to what to tell family members when it is time to take their loved one off the ventilator. They do no have the final word. There is an appeals process, but that process can only last 30 minutes while the patient waiting for the ventilator is manually ventilated, Two more hours will be needed to clean the ventilator and reequip it. Three people will take turns manually ventilating the patient, Oh did I mention that once you are assigned a color, the person coming off the respirator would have had to be on the respirator for 5 days, so theoretically long enough to turn the corner and get themselves into a higher color group. However, the decision as to who comes off the respirator is made by random computer selection of those in the lowest category.

This is not to say that the assignment of the color group is random. Patient's are stratified by a variety of factors, age NOT being one of them.

Today, I had a new patient with possible Covid admitted to my service. She is 87 with a touch of dementia and lives at her daughter's home with a loving family. I spoke with her daughter on the phone to get information about her mother. She told me to try and do everything to help her mother but that if it was clear that there was no hope of her returning to her previous level of functioning, or close to it, that her mother had decided long ago that she did not want to live that kind of life.

When I went into see the patient, I gowned and gloved and on the way in , I noticed her lunch tray and decided to give a hand to the other staff by bringing it in. PPE (personal protection equipment ) is still sufficient but not plentiful so my act saved one set. I brought her lunch tray in with me and saw a pleasant looking woman who appeared about 15 years younger than her age. She had eyes closed and did not respond when I called her name. I put down her lunch tray next to her untouched breakfast tray and did my exam. She appeared to be comfortable and was definitely someone who was doing much better than her numbers (lab values vital signs and other measurable qualities). I went to leave and the empty breakfast tray and the new lunch tray just haunted me. I opened the packet for her utensils and the vanilla pudding put a bit on the spoon and placed it by her lips. She opened her lips and took a taste. Then another. Some of her fruit cup and then most of her mashed potatoes followed. A bit of meatloaf and then the rest of her pudding. She said nothing. She did not open her eyes, even as I tried to coax her to do so. Finally, on a bit of the meatloaf. She refused to open. Another offer and another refusal and so I knew after 30 minutes of being fed, she was not taking any more. I said out loud to her, I guess that is it for now and as I left I heard her faintly say: Thank you. I turned and her eyes were open and then, a second later, they closed again. For that second they were so clear and blue and aware and I imagined her quite the beauty in her youth. After that second, she was back in that space where she was when I walked in, but she had let me know she was there.

Next week, her condition may worsen and she will be a blue. She won't get a chance at a life saving machine, She will likely pass alone in a hospital with a loving daughter sitting at home hoping for all the world for her mother to get better. Even if I could do more medically, which I cannot, I could not alter her course. Even now, the most I could do for her he be present, give her some pudding and hope that time and some combination of medications we are giving her make a difference,

I do not usually have difficulty coping, but today I hit the wall and next week this day will be the good old days when I had 30 minutes to spend with one patient.

Thank you for your work and other medical staff all over. Your interaction with the woman mentioned had an impact far beyond anything measurable or understandable. Tough times and decisions are ahead, but don't forget all the immeasurable positive impacts you are able to have on patients and their families, even simply by care and dedication in the face of travesty. Keep strong and keep being that human warrior that we all need.

A girl in my office is making masks. But are the cloth ones very effective?

Think about it this way:

It's the same as covering your mouth when you cough or sneeze.

In past wildfire seasons in Northern California, people wore masks everywhere as the smoke enveloped San Francisco. While I am sure cloth masks stopped many from breathing in smoke directly, they still had to be inhaling a fair amount while outside. There is also the potential consequence of unnecessary touching your face more as a result.

But why are they only doing it in the US? They aren't a US based site.

I would venture to say the US market is where they make the most money. I am not sure of all the legal steps of the government to restrict a site based outside of the US., and just as frustrated or more so even:confused:

Did 6 sets of 20 53 lb kettlebell swings and 6 sets of 15 ring pull ups yesterday preceded by 18 pull ups and 15 50 pound shoulder presses. Not bad for a sexagenarian

The vocabulary ?

There is finally some rumblings about the cancellation of EDC as some music acts take it off their schedules. No official word yet though.

Has this thread topic already been posted?

 

Anyway, casual observation. I have never been approached by so many men before that really wanted to get fucked. Is this because:

 

1. boredom and not knowing what else to do

2. boredom and left alone with an obsession acting out is to be expected

3. I can see the end times from here

4. My daily work out is really paying off

5. Too much time on our hands

6. Too much/too little cottage cheese

7. Other

8. All of the above

Boredom, coupled with two things.

The ignorance to assume that because they dont have symptoms they are not infected with coronavirus. And secondly, the false over confidence that if they get infected, they will develop minimal symptoms and get better and not fall critically ill.

I follow this line of thinking. Since total time since the start of self quarantine actions started a week to two weeks ago for a big part of the country will now extend to a total of 30-45 days with the president's guidelines extended till April 30th, it's one thing to responsibly take that personal risk and have a conversation about it. For example, two individuals who have self quarantined for 2 weeks, have an intimate time with each other, and then again self quarantine for 2 weeks. All while acknowledging that constant risk is there, and you may end up responsible for making the other person sick and or people close to that other person sick. In my opinion that a similar risk as going to the grocery store once a week during this pandemic and shoppers possibly making other shoppers ill.

The problem is, the likelihood that both parties will be that level of responsible and hold accountability for their actions is highly unlikely for two strangers meeting for the first time.

More troubling is the ignorance that seems to persist as well as the disregard to the others health and viewpoints. Inspirationally, this crisis has shown the incredible level of sense of community and civil responsibility in some. On the other hand, I am fearful and disappointed how it highlights the narrow self serving motives in others.

Why did rentmen remove rates for US listings? Whenever I'm in another country rates are visable. If an escort's rates are too high and are listed saves us both wasted time from me contacting them and in some places I can't host and only want to hire an escort who can do incalls.

To 'attempt' to protect themselves legally.

In my humble experience, most of time they don't, at all.

The one that gets me is when people say "great profile...what are your rates?" When, (not now since I edited it but before this week) I have put my rate in the headline as 2.4.0.= 1 hr and have the link to my website with my rates in the body of my ad.?‍♂️