Mocha

Yeah it’s the same franchise. However, just be warned. RentMasseur carries a ton of flakes. Moreso than rentmen. I think @marylander1940 said it, about how people go on there to get escorts for cheap. One guy wasted my time over the weekend, contacting me twice for a session: didn’t follow up the first time, then wanted to try and bargain me for $100, then bargain me for $60 saying he just wanted to suck my dick. I meant to put his fucking ass on my national client warning list for that bullshit. Cause he owes me a time-waste fee. Frankly I’m just getting fucking fed up with the shit already. RentMasseur is a joke sometimes. I think after this I may take my ad down for a little while. Despite me meeting good clients on it overtime, it’s just becoming too much of a headache to use when traveling. Everybody who contacts from there wants an Incall (because they can’t host), and then they bitch about being short on time, or bitch about having to go anywhere outside of their 2 mile radius. I think I may just let it go and only use it when I’m somewhere local and it doesn’t require them to have much thought process. And besides, I have 30 reviews on Rentmen, and only 4 on RentMasseur. It’s not even doing anything for me.

Thanks all for your input: I've been offline as the holiday weekend got hectic. Rather than quote individual posts, I can add some input to the questions. I also did do some changes to my ad to add more details prior to even reading this, as i like to change my ad periodically. Some people mentioned red flags about certain things, but you have to understand I've been in all sorts of scenarios. What is it about setting boundaries in an ad that is a red flag? I find when I don't lay out certain expectations in my ad, things slide and people play ignorance later. So I have to emphasis "SERIOUS CLIENTS ONLY", and cancellation fees, and keeping their session. I also bring up "being late" to a session, because some people call with unrealistic expectations of arrival. I don't want to be in a situation where I'm in an unfamiliar city, and a client calls with 30 minutes notice wanting an outcall. I also don't want to be in a position where I've traveled to a city, got set up in a hotel, only to be cancelled on because the travel time took a few minutes (and I literally mean a few minutes, not 2 hours) longer than expected (its like sod laws, that I get a client wanting to meet the day I arrive into town) some have expectations that I'm already "here". That's when the emphasis on advanced notice is brought up. As for rates, like I said: I'm not saying I'm not a certified masseur. I'm just saying I don't make a living off giving massages. I make a living providing "experiences". Therefore, I don't have interest in charging $50-$100 for a massage, because i don't work in the volume and capacity that a "masseur" would be expected to see. That said, I can always appreciate having some input and tweaks to my ad as well. I do travel a lot, but right now my lifestyle is on the road. That may be changing soon, but for right now I'm basically doing the tour around as I find its a lot better money than staying put in Kansas City and trying to build a client base...a place I've been based over the last few months

Welcome back to the game! I started out in Miami myself. It is unfortunate that there’s fewer sites out there right now. However, the double-edged sword to having fewer websites: more clients have fewer places to browse, so atleast for me: my phone goes off with texts round the clock. However It’s become almost overwhelming to keep up with and weed thru the real from the flake. Also, the former back-page and Craigslist usual flakes who likely just contact people for sex for sport, and don’t intend to actually meet, have been using Rentmen more too. I am still a fan of adam4adam, however to cut down on expended conversation: I just recently posted my number and I have a message saying I don’t read/reply to messages on the site.

So I advertise On RentMasseur and Adam as masseur. Despite me having met many clients from both, both sites seem to be highly fickle when it comes down to the ones asking for a massage session. It’s often the ones who are asking for a massage, who seem to not be able to follow thru and commit to appointments. I’ve seen it on both sites. It’s either last minute requests with short notice, or becoming unresponsive when the time comes to coordinating on planning. I’m wondering if some of it has to do with rates. I pretty much set a starting rate, and then list two other prices as well. Some people may have it in their mind that my massage rates should be something like massage envy or something. But I tell people I’m not a “masseur” nor do I just offer “massages”, but rather an all together experience which just happens to include massage. I’m considering what prices to increase the volume. Considering I do a lot of travel, I feel it’s not just a factor of price, but also making sure I can get by on the number of people who actually show up.

I think you have a point, read on... Exactly! Despite me not being at all an advocate of flake and fake behavior, I have to say this was unfortunately an accident waiting to happen. Inviting someone you don’t know well, escort or non escort to a wedding is hard enough of its own. That should have never happened, for one. Hollywood portrays it like something that people are totally comfortable with doing. It’s not. I’ve literally been to 1 wedding my entire life. And the person I went with, we broke up...but our picture at his mother’s wedding remains forever. Then you also said weddings aren’t your thing. Well it’s not the thing for probably 50% of all gay men lol, and you might have just happened to pick the 1 who wasn’t. Plus he’s a “young guy”. You didn’t specify how young. This might of be an awkward situation diverted. You never know how someone is going to behave in public. I just don’t see how it could have been beneficial to bring along an escort who you’ve not met before, along to a wedding. Weddings can be gossipy and highly social, and that can just put anyone out of their comfort zone. Plus the whole context reeks of love, commitment, and romance, and for some people that just conjures up all types of feelings that might be too intense for a 1st “date”. I find a lot of guy’s parents are divorced, and to watch someone get married could be too much for them if they aren’t around people they know. Better to fuck on the 1st date, than to go to a wedding on a first date. Too many gushy vibes at stake, and a sex worker probably shouldn’t be your first pick. Not saying that we can’t be all of the above, but not in that context. Why would he do it? Some people play along right up to the moment. I don’t think it was some fantastic better offer that came along. I just think it’s more of a case where the person lost their confidence in attending the event, and ghosting was preferable to looking like a wimp.

I actually had a client once who was friends with a guy I was dating. And we were all having drinks together. But I think at that point, me and the guy just became on “lets be friends” mode, so there was no tension there. I didn’t end up telling the guy I who I was dating what the deal was, but I did have the conversation later with my client.

Sounds good in theory, but the problem is....many of the guys advertising on Rentmen are flakes. It’s really dismaying what I’ve heard. I had a lil young client who was just under 30...had the whole thuggish White boy look to him (which just so happens to be my perfect type) but he was a real client and very professional. He would invite me up to his town about 50 miles from where I lived, get a hotel after work for me to host and let me keep it. But on our first meet, he waited for me to get there first, saying in the past he has gotten hotel for guys off RentMen who said they were coming, and they never showed up. So when these guys are arranging stuff and people don’t come thru, they start trusting the site less...and then it’s like, how do they differentiate the flakes of rentmen from the flakes of Grindr? But generally, I don’t worry about younger guys being demanding, I’m usually the dom top in those situations anyway Also...the ones who hire escorts may do so for any number of reasons, not just simply a hot fuck. I know in any city I’m in, I can easily get a hot fuck, at most any time of day or night, so ain’t no need to be paying for it. Then again, I generally end up hooking up with white and Latino bottoms which is a large makeup of the general gay community. Easy, peasy. However, some people want specific things. I’m sure me and @hypothetically know, it can be hard to find a big dick black top once you get outside of the big player cities (Atlanta, Chicago, Washington DC, New York) especially considering some of the “preferences” people can have.

Well...I know the OP didn’t specify, but I would also assume (especially in New York) it would be a safety and liability risk for a dancer to just up and leave and go with a stranger. Just watching a few episodes of Forensic Files will tell you that lol. I don’t know a whole bunch about the dancing/go-go circuit, but off topic a bit: I’ve never gotten into it. I know friends and even a hookup buddy of mine who got into the Dallas dance scene: Zippers, and another one I can’t quite remember. I do know that, not all go-go dancers are escorts. I’ve known a few here and there, and there are some who are almost anti-sex work. So...it may be in best interest to gauge. Personally: I have respect for male dancers, but I had an experience in Orlando where I befriended a guy who was obsessed with male dancers. He would spend his whole night trying to get with them, tipping them, feeling up on them...instead of just meeting regular people who were already at the club. I try to avoid strip bars when I can. I think it’s sleazy to go after a dancer with the intentions of taking them home. If I tip a dancer, it’s with no expectations. It also cheats a person out of possibly meeting someone who isn’t working. Some people get hooked on chasing strippers, but they could be missing out on receptive patrons of the club. On the other hand, if the dancer offers private sessions or whatever, that’s different. Like I said, based on my experiences with go go dancer friends, it’s not the same type of sex work. And remember: they are getting paid to not do much but have confidence to dance on a stage in front of strangers. Therefore, actual sex is going to likely be something different. In quote: After paying $350 for a private dance at a gentlemen’s club, a Montana man called police to complain that the stripper did not have sex with him…. [W]hen he did not get the expected sex, he dialed 911 to register a consumer complaint. https://abovethelaw.com/2014/08/wherein-we-explore-the-legal-difference-between-a-stripper-and-a-prostitute/

Oh nice... They all know me here...but I’ll send you a private message with the link.

It would be nice if Rentmen did a lot of things to better assist clients and providers. Like I mentioned, $1 for each time someone views our number, because I’m tired of my phone going off with thousands of texts per week, many which are vague, and say nothing about the person contacting me. Atleast RIP men4rent would make people include their email, city, phone number and name in their emails. But there were rumors some of those seemed synthetic. I asked one person to include some details, he responds, “I’m not doing all that shit”. Well then, how am I supposed to know anything based on, “hi, I seen you on rentmen, wanted to know if you’re available tonight”. And his area code wasn’t local and I generally have ads in 4-5 different cities ??‍♂️ But I suppose it helps to weed out synthetic reviews by asking for a email conversation. There have been people complaining about faux reviews in the past. Rentmen is trying, but I think they’re being savvy in not making any drastic changes without testing out possible results.

They are friendly, but...the “legal weed” tends to affect other things: namely people’s focus on coordinating sexual advances and taking anything seriously. When expecting an appointment and one guy after the next says, “I fell asleep”, or “I partied too hard last night”...it’s best to avoid texts in Denver after certain times. Or all times to be exact. Thanks. But thing is, I’m not cocky. I just don’t stand for BS and nonsense. However, I’m kind of stepping back from things and being more “in the clouds” but sans the hashish...

I’ve decided, I’m not going to fight anymore. I’m just going to let everything Rest In Peace. As the serenity prayer goes: http://cdn.shoplightspeed.com/shops/602983/files/4895893/serenity-prayer-journal.jpg

I just feel America as a whole is just overdone. @hypothetically was right when he said awhile back that the whole escort thing is like in “fashion” right now. I wholeheartedly believe there’s more sex workers in the US than there are clients to keep up. Yet, we’re so limited on where we can advertise. Where did America go wrong? Why was things so open back in 2003, 2004, 2007..,and now we’re in some puritan type of society where everything is censored and you can’t have slightly nude photos on model mayhem or adam4adam front cover anymore. Let alone advertise as an OMG...escort. Even outside of the biz, your average city is going to have 10 guys who look similar or better doing the same hustle. That’s why I’m really trying to find a lower competitive market. At the same time, it can’t be someplace isolated, where there isn’t but 1 or 2 rent guys advertising. It looks good on paper, being the only escort in the state, but then you get there and realize why. I thought about moving to New Mexico for that reason, but that area goes thru some random dry spells that can’t be explained.

I'm just curious, what are the factors that make NYC more intense and aggressive than other markets. Is it the callers or the competition or a mix of both? I recently emailed Rentmen, and I told them that they should consider dividing up Rentmen of the day and video of the day into more categories than east and west. Literally just about every day, the people who have purchased Rentmen of the day are generally those from New York or LA. I suggested they ad more regions/areas so whoever chooses Rentmen of the day can concentrate on viewers in their general region. Not just 1 whole side of the country or another. I was told they are considering it...so if it happens, thank me later.

THANKYou! And difference is, escorts don’t have waiting rooms (maybe), receptionists, and triage nurses. You usually don’t see the doctor until much later. And they aren’t rushing around for you, even if it is a medical emergency. Therefore if something gets delayed, the client is going to walk into our personal space, when we may not be ready for them. I’ve discussed the topic before myself. That’s why I don’t do last minute appointments usually, especially outcalls.

I guess the takeaway was, another client who does a dick move when the escort doesn’t lay down his life to be available at and when it conveniences him. I won’t say the escort wasn’t being exactly prompt either (especially considering the escort was the one who was hosting)...but one dick move doesn’t excuse another dick move. When a client decides to be a dick, in response to possible dick behavior...it becomes a match between who can be the bigger dick. And in this case, I think @bashful was the bigger dick because not only did he cancel, but he alluded to being able to reschedule and never did, in a passive aggressive attempt to tell the escort he didn’t like time being changed. And worst yet, never expressed his concerns, thus the escort never knew why. He likely filed the client as good client gone bad, and moved on. @bashful should have expressed his concerns something like, “hey...I can’t do at 7 or I would appreciate if you try to stick to the time next time, please...so don’t keep me waiting”. Instead, this happened: one became the bigger dick than the other.

You’re right. I had to just take a breather. After writing that post, I had to find a good article on letting things go, and I think I have a clear head now. Just like I said earlier in this topic, it’s time for me to just stop entertaining all these texts. I’ve got to stop. After that guy sent me the message saying he couldn’t make it, I should have just said nothing...and just went on about my day. I’ve been practicing with it lately. Today I’ve not returned 2 messages: mainly because they’re asking if I’m in a certain city when it’s clear on my ad the travel dates I have up. And on A4A I already blocked 2 potential clients because they weren’t following the instructions like I asked, and felt my blood pressure going up. I’m really not being a dick, but it’s just going to have to stop. It has nothing to do with me not liking escorting or being in the wrong business like @EZEtoGRU seems to believe, I just cant be imprisoned by round the clock messages, which aren’t going anywhere. So...I’m just going to respond less. I don’t know if it comes off as desperate or pushy, but whatever case...all the times of me trying to communicate with people and get them to stick with plans, I’m cutting down on all that. If they follow up great, if not I just can’t be bothered. It’s easy for someone to sit on the sideline and make it seem like I’m the problem, but if they actually had insight into what I handle on a weekly basis, they would understand. So I’m not worried about what someone else says, because I don’t expect them to understand. They also wouldn’t understand when someone is trying to operate in a bad market, the issues are intensified because you’re not just dealing with the regular issues of the business. I’m in an area that I know is bad for escorting (at the same time, reasons have it that it’s what I have to work with for right now). I’m working in a market (Midwest town) that is known to have racist incidents, has a frugality economy across the board, high levels of poverty (and some of the attitude of clients who pay, treat it like we’re looking for handouts, not as someone on business...and that’s why they don’t keep their appointments) the Black locals here don’t support my business (I’ve had 1 black local client in the 7 months I’ve resided in this market, and it was a 3 som with his White partner). So it’s easy for people like @EZEtoGRU to run his mouth and talk about business being bad. But what he doesn’t see, is my regular client I’ve known for years in Phoenix who just offered me 1,000 next month. What he doesn’t see is the client I have in Florida who paid for my rentmen ad for half of the year. What he doesn’t see is the 27 year old construction worker who gives me 300 everytime he scheduled an appointment with me. Yet has a body like an MMA fighter. People want to talk a lot of crap, but have nothing to back it up.

I’ll tell you what I have learned: I need to ignore you and you need to do the same. I don’t care about your opinion. Guess what? You told me years ago and I’m still here, still banking, and since years ago: I’ve bought 2 cars already, and met LOTS of clients. I pretty much have clients in every state. Because I love what I do and do it very well, regardless of what you think or feel. Your opinion is not my problem. Never was, never will be. I have plenty of new and regular people who are more than happy to see me and keep me in biz. If you don’t like what I have to talk about, you can keep it moving. What are you doing with your life besides coming on here and trying to put me down and criticize what I do? Worry about yourself, because I’m not worried about you. You don’t even have a picture of yourself on here. Why am I going to let some Mr. nobody tell me how to run my life? Bye!

This is another example of exactly why this website must go forward. This is the typical annoying bullshit that certain people who see us do, and then they act as if they don’t have anyone to answer to: A client who I met once before, contacted me Thursday asking if I was in town. No “are you available for an appointment”, no greeting or anything. So I returned his message Friday, saying that I had arrived back to town. He’s asking if I can host. I told him I’m not able to host. He tells me he could get a hotel for me, but he’s asking if I can meet on the Friday I had just arrived. I told him, I would like to meet today...but I had just returned from being out of town and had a long ride the day before. I asked what other days he would be open to meet during. He gave me Sunday (today) was the best day he could meet, but mentioned possibly a couple of other days. The night before, I text to confirm time. No response. He texts me the next day after noon, to say the text just came in, but that he can’t meet today because it’s storming. The storm was last night, it’s clear today. Now: he could have easily texted me that earlier before getting my message. He waits until getting my message from the night before saying anything about canceling. When I ask him for cancellation fee or he can rebook within next couple days, he says “really” then gives me some rundown on how HE wanted to meet Friday but I wasn’t available (once again, someone trying to boss me around by being non-negotiable, and then suggesting other dates and not making due on it). Then he tells me to “take care”. I don’t know if it’s a power trip or a Midwest thing or what. But I’ve had another client I met before in the same city, do something similar: he hit me back the moment I got back home and asked to see me. I would have had to stop and drive an hour up, despite me having just spent the whole day traveling the day prior. When I tell them for good reason I can’t take the session that day, but can do another...they lie and say they can, and then fail to follow thru on it. Then they want to bitch and act like they aren’t responsible for scheduling anything, but they expect me to drop everything and see them...yet when I’m available to actually meet, they don’t want to drop everything to see me. I don’t know why they think our meeting relies only on when THEY are available. No, no, no. It doesn’t work that way. A session doesn’t happen simply because THEY are available. We BOTH have to be available. And I shouldn’t have to contort my schedule and sacrifice my comfort and convenience, just because they wake up and feel like meeting out the blue, with not much time to make it happen. I think some of it may even be a slave/master or older/younger age mentality. Considering the type of guys generally playing these bullshit games. It’s got to be deeper than just what it seems. Some people still operate under the premise that I have to run around for them, but have no respect when it comes down to my process and what I require and expect.

LA is good for photo shoots, meeting clients who came in for elsewhere, or specific arrangements. Unless you just happen to already be established there. Or like you say, doing it as a side hustle. I just don’t see how guys in New York are affording it out there. Considering a large amount of clients want us to host nowadays, I just don’t see how anyone is pulling off having an apartment/hotel in high rent, extreme competition markets. Guess I wouldn’t know unless I’m actually there. On the other hand, cheaper cities like Kansas City ain’t doing shit either. It’s like every other time a local books an appointment, it’s always some reason why they can’t keep the plans. So unreliable. No respect for sex worker’s time. To them we’re doing this as some optional side hustle, they don’t even treat it as anything to follow thru on. Ask for a cancellation fee, they look thru the phone like they just seen 2 heads.

Honestly: I don’t put too much emphasis on it. Pride events neither inspire or annoy me anymore. Some years I go, some years I don’t. Last year I was at Washington DC, Saint Pete Florida and Milwaukee Pride. This year I only did Denver (in a full on Miami outfit lol). I think it’s good that Pride has gotten away from some of the melodramatic, past events, I really don’t like expressing or seeing people expressing tears and sadness in that type of “environment”. Gay Pride and being around large crowds, it’s better to keep emotions low. I know after the Orlando “shooting”, many Pride events were doing vigils to remember the victims. That’s nice, but it’s just too sappy for a large audience. I remember after that happened, I went to a Elvis ? impersonation show, and he did a tribute song to the Orlando shooting. It had got me all teared up and I couldn’t stop because the song was so sad lol. Nowadays (I’m certain cities at least) it is more fun and more commercial and inclusive. That’s why nowadays it’s rarely called gay pride, it’s just called Pride. And it’s cute that companies like H&M have provided sections for gay pride attire. When I went to Denver pride, it’s just a day to get outside, get some exercise, get my mind off the routine of sex work, and just have fun. Granted, if people go to Pride expecting more than what it is, or under estimating the potential for real drama to happen, it’s not going to be as fun as intended. Just go with low expectations, at the same time make sure if you go with someone that the boundaries are in place. Too many people lose their sense during pride.

I won’t post pics, but there was a particular famous porn/escort walking around Folsom with his big ole 10” (or maybe it’s 11” or 12” idk) Uncut dick in broad daylight. Perhaps one could get business indirectly by being “spotted” out. I know for me...even though I notice many Pride events are becoming more of a fashion show, nudist arts festival and showing off one’s body (even straight people are getting in on the action) than about gay “rights”, I’m just a bit reserved about even having my shirt off in an open public space lol.

That is true, now that I think about it. One of the most frequent question I get is from clients and friends are, “what’s your best City” for biz. I tell them, I don’t have one. That’s why I include whole regions because, there is no 1 best city. Because I could go there one month and do fine, and the next month nada. I’ve known people go to Chicago and Washington DC and do big things, and then on the next trip or subsequent trip, don’t get anything. There’s some small farm towns I’ve made more coin in, than most trips to Los Angeles.

That may be true. It’s just in the past of previously advertising in New York (though I have met many clients from New York in other cities), I’ve not seen the response level as in other areas. I can imagine with NYC it’s also about maintaining top visibility. New York and LA is one of the main reasons rentboy of the day is always sold out, weeks in advance. I’m going to reach out to Rentmen and ask if they can consider that...because it’s like why is it that everytime there’s a rentboy of the day, they’re in LA or New York. Go to rentmen right now today, I can bet that the RentMen of the day is someone advertising in New York or Los Angeles, depending on what region of the country you’re in. I think rentmen needs to include more regions in fact. So far they only divide it up into 2 regions. I’m going to email them today...