soloyo215

Think of it this way, will you be offended if he buys mugs for his collection when he's in your city, or takes time for himself or takes a tour of the city, or uses the opportunity in any other way? I hope not. People use the opportunities that present for them all the time. For as long as he fulfills his end of the deal, you should let the rest go (IMO). He's free to do as he pleases before and after, including seizing the opportunity for making more money.

Kudos to you, maybe you are just that hot. 😉

Thanks for the replies. My instinct was right that I should have cancelled. I'm on vacation in Mexico, so I should have just cancelled. Thank you for this. Didn't know. Noted and in the future I'll make more informed decisions.

In my marriage, the income difference has changed several times. Soon after we moved in together he was laid off, then I made a few poor career decisions, then he got a job and I was working part-time only, then my career went in steroids and my income quadrupled in the first year, then his union got him a 22% salary increase, then he got an inheritance, then I got an inheritance... I mean, at this point in our relationship it's hard to keep track of who was making more than the other at a given moment. What we had was the attitude that there isn't such thing as "your money is paying for this" or "my money is paying for that". Just because the bills were paid from my bank account doesn't mean that "my money paid for it". If he doesn't do his part, I can't do mine. Without his contribution I'm unable to make mine. It really is a collaboration. Of course, we both have our "me money", but we are very clear and transparent about money and finances. It also helps that we have the same views and attitudes about spending, incurring in debt and buying habits. In fact, it was a little odd, but I remember that in our first date we actually talked about money and spending habits. We trust each other since our commitment is about being responsible in every aspect of ourselves as individuals and in our relationship, and trusting that the other is going to make responsible decisions about everything, including money, sex, career, and everything else. So far, never had any money-related issues.

I scheduled a massage session for today. I scheduled it about 4 days prior. I got sick the day after I booked the guy, but hoped to feel good by the time the appointment arrived. I didn't feel as sick, but my body wasn't exactly feeling up for being caressed by anyone. Since there are many posts here about clients cancelling at the last minute, I decided to go to the appointment, and let the guy know that I am still sick, I don't want him to catch whatever my body is fighting, and quite frankly, I wasn't in the mood. He talked me into proceeding with the massage (I was going to pay for the session even if it didn't happen since I showed up anyway, not ideal, but not a big deal). I fell asleep during the massage and started feeling that my body temperature was rising (and not in the way we like). The guy made minimum contact and he said at the end that the massage he gave me can contribute to healing and recovering faster. I don't know about that, but I appreciate that he was a perfect gentleman and professional and didn't just want the money for nothing. My question to providers: Did I handle the situation correctly? I now am worried about him catching whatever I have, which can make him unavailable for other clients? Did he handle it properly? Is there a right/better way to handle clients who get sick? Being sick is (IMO) a legitimate excuse for cancelling at the last minute. Thoughts?

I wonder if the RM site requires to provide your date of birth or just your age. If it's the latter, he might have entered age 19 three years ago and haven't adjusted it. Does anyone know of the site calculates and adjusts age automatically?

I went to Bangkok in 2016, didn't hire anyone, at that time that wasn't my thing, but I saw the many opportunities. Great to know about this. I read most of this thread and the discussion is quite interesting, but sadly mostly historical. I only know of a place I went recently in Barcelona, Sauna Thermas, that is the facilities of a bathhouse, but with men for hire.

I have to agree with NJF. It's always a gamble, and one bad experience doesn't mean all will be. Best we can do is reduce harm the best way we can.

Yes. No big deal for me since when I choose a provider I have been looking at a list of providers I'm interested in. I've never look at only one provider when I'm looking for a new provider. I just book the next in line. As for the reasons for them to cancel at the last minute, they could be any, and in all honesty, neither reason or excuse matters. Life if too short and there are plenty of providers to choose from.

Just my thoughts: Gift cards are nothing more than someone paying for some good for another person. I have paid a provider for other people, just not in the form of a gift card. I think it's cute, and also a way of getting new clients (if you want more clients, that is). In my humble opinion, it could work if there's a level of trust between you and that client. I could also see how it could be challenging since the provider might not know who the card recipient is, so the logistics of the initial conversation has to be handled too. Additionally, just because I have a great time with a provider, doesn't mean that my friend will too. People have different preferences. A Visa gift card can be spent on anything, but a provider gift card can only be redeemed by the provider. That difference is where I believe it could become challenging. I'd be curious to know how it goes if any provider(s) decide to go with that idea.

The younger generation's way of thinking is the result of parents from our generation telling them that they deserve everything good and nothing bad. That has translated into self-entitlement, self-centeredness, and attention seeking. It's not that cut and dry, but overall, culturally speaking, that's what we can normally expect from them. Additionally, some providers seem to think that because we're the clients and willing to pay them, that we are also willing to wait or put up with whatever nonsense they come up with. Like others have mentioned, be clear about the scheduling and timing, and cancel if he's not willing to honor your schedule. Of course, within reason, meaning, sometimes there are legitimate reasons for being late.

Great point.

I think it's a generational thing. I find it tacky and even dangerous (doesn't he realize that there are people out there trying to know who has money and who doesn't?). However, like BenjaminNicholas pointed out, to them, getting views, likes and social media fame is very important, maybe more important than their own privacy or safety. The action of posting his finances is not a turnoff for me, nor do I care about what people decide to do with the money they make, nor I'm nobody to feel that he should or should not make a given amount of money. That's just none of my business. However, the immaturity about sharing this information about his own money may transfer into other aspects, such as sharing information about his clients, which is a major issue to me. How do I know that he might get the "wonderful" idea of posting information about his clients, just to get views and likes?

That second of the look between them was the climax of the movie (to me). It broke my heart.

Yes, I was caught at a parking garage by security (and I wish he wanted to join, but no luck). I was also caught in the movie theater men's room blowing the hell off a some guy. I got caught by some guy in the men's room of a sports complex blowing a guy, but that one did join, so I blew them both. Then my ex-girlfriend passed in front of a car where I was in the passenger seat blowing another guy in a parking lot (Good God, I have given so many blow jobs in this life!)

Some in the provider line of work maintain what I call a "hustler mentality", which is that they seem to derive pleasure out of taking advantage of people. Time and time again it's been said to discuss some or all specifics in the original communication and/or right before starting the session. Clarity is a good thing and it helps weed out those types of providers (I'm referring to malicious, ill-intended providers with no intentions of fulfilling their end of the bargain). Also, when something bad happens, a place like this forum can not only help others not to be taken advantage of, but it also helps giving the malicious provider a bad reputation, which is bad for his business. Of course, telling about a bad experience is different than slandering. It's not ok if a provider includes erotic massages as part of his service and then is offended when asked about it. We all should know about that. However, be sure that you as a client are doing your due diligence, which can be gathering information from places like this forum or other clients, reviews, etc., and communicating about what you are interested in.

I've been to the Acqua Spa (Constitution St) and the Blue Spa (in Olas Altas). The Acqua Spa has great facilities and masseurs, and it offers other quality services, such as body scrubs, manicure/pedicure, etc. It's not the place for extras, at least in my experience. Never got a hint of extras during my massages at the Acqua Spa, but during the vinchy shower, there's been a clue or two, but I haven't been interested (yes, that happens). The Blue Spa offers similar services but the facilities are more modest, and also has female staff. There's a place named Galini, that offers good massages and negotiable extras, and the facilities are neat, though not like the Aqcua Spa. PVR offers many street, non-advertised massages with extras being negotiable, and of course, since there's no standard, it's something to be negotiated if you want something specific, or if you like to let things go, as they will go at the discretion of the masseur (keep in mind that prostitution is legal in Mexico). Some of those places look nice and well taken care of, some look as seedy as they look in the movies. Your choice. Most are in the Basilio Badillo street. The Blue Spa opened one massage only facility in that street, which I tried, and I guess it's there for them to cater the gay, want-extra crowd that don't cater in their Olas Altas facilities. In the area where the largest gay hotels are, I saw two massage places with guys standing out offering massages to passers by. I tried one, and asked for an erotic massage, and there was nothing erotic about it. Again, things are negotiable so communication is key. In that area, there are one or two parlors with young men standing there, but they didn't come across (to me) as having a good attitude. I saw them rejecting or ignoring prospective customers several times, so it seems like they are there more for their own interest. There's one near the gay clubs area that always has these muscular guys hanging out. I haven't tried that one because to me it looks like the kid of place where you'd leave running naked after being robbed of everything including your clothes. The guys look gorgeous, but they are pushy, to the point that I cross the street to avoid being approached by them. Finally, for the best therapeutic massage (nothing sensual/sexual at all, the guy doesn't even see you naked), I found this place, Felipe's, same street than the Acqua Spa. His massage is great, the type that includes reflexology and even some elements of physical therapy. He's professional, affordable and great quality. He's also very friendly. He also teaches, so I imagine he might have trained a great deal of the masseurs in the area. All-in-all, Puerto Vallarta really offers and entire range of massage options for pretty much every taste, need and desire. All you have to do is walk around, read the local guides and ask.

I am mindful and respectful to people, period. Yes, especially now, rudeness and nastiness seem to be the way of living for many people, including providers and clients. I agree that it is a give an take in the interpersonal too. Even in my bad experiences I've remained calm and collected, and have ended a session politely. When things don't work out, they just don't work out. Getting or giving attitude about it doesn't do anything if making things unsavory when they don't need to be. When some of the logistics don't work out, patience.

I can speak only based on my experience. I've never hired a provider for a BF experience, so I have no clue as to how second sessions are with those. My experience is that in the second round I already have an idea of what to expect since all the novelty of getting to know the provider is gone. I counter that when I have a provider that I really like, by not doing or knowing everything in the first session. It has worked in some cases. For example, right now I am in PVR on vacation, and I went to a provider that I saw last year. The session was as great as the first, but it wasn't as thrilling since I already know the basics of what I can expect. This time I spoke up and asked for a little extra of the previous extras. It was great and I had a great time. It helps that we have good chemistry, he's not one of those who feel mechanical and detached. At the end of the session I actually told him that next time I might want something else/different, and he replied with a smile that he's looking forward to knowing what I'll be wanting to do. In other instances, the second time has been downright boring, some to the point that I haven't gone back. Like others have mentioned, there are different reasons for it, from the client's or provider's mood, to being adventurous, to just being about the novelty of someone new. I don't see anything wrong with any of the reasons for that to be. Then there are the ones who are my regulars. I love going to them mostly for the sense of comfort. Sometimes I just want something without too much thinking, hassle, asking, negotiating or guessing. They are perfect gentlemen where they need to be, and I have a great experience every time I see them.

Just like with body types, race, ethnicities and other aspects of being human, I feel the same way about age. I find both beauty and ugliness in all of them, so I've been with both much younger (of legal age) and much older men through my entire adulthood. I don't buy into the notions that many of the media portrays in terms of isms. In my experience, many gay men just love men, especially when it comes to sexual expression.

Not lubricated. Some come with flavors (mint, strawberry, etc.). You don't want to have the taste of KY Jelly in your mouth. Latex preferred, if allergic to latex, then polyurethane. Not sheep-skin (if they still make them), those are the ones with holes, as those defeat the purpose. Of course, the decision is solely yours, based on your level of comfort and risk. You are the one living with your choices, so the decision of using/not using them belongs to you.

Client here, no, that information is not relevant to me. As a client, I'm just going to tell my perspective and opinion, just my opinion and nothing more. The first thing that came to mind was why does it bother you. What exactly about that one particular subject rubs you the wrong way? Not saying that is right or wrong to feel either way about it, but more in terms of what is the source of discomfort around that topic. The second thing that came to mind is that part of the provider's job is to provide some kind of fantasy, and maybe the marital status of the provider feeds to the client's fantasy. This of course, is pure speculation on my part. But considering that there is an entire line of pornography around "married men", maybe that's what they are looking for when inquiring. Personally I can't care less about the marital status of the provider, but that might be excitement-important to some clients. The third thing that came to mind was, reflecting on some of my providers, many have actually shared quite a lot of personal information, such as incarceration, medications they take for mental health issues, and being parents. They have volunteered that information without me asking. Same thing, it doesn't impact me or what I am looking for in a provider. I hope your clients are respectful and not creepy when they inquire.

Well, I "casually noticed that detail".

That's unfortunate. Unifrtunately, there is no way to avoid providers doing that to clients or clients doing that to providers. That's just the way it is.

My two cents: there are no specific rules. Providers go as far as they feel comfortable going, unless it is discussed prior to the session, which many times is unlikely since it's a "massage". Something that has given me the idea of expectations is when I see that the providers has a profile in both the massage site and the escort site. I go for a massage with the intent of getting a massage, with no expectations (or so I keep telling myself). I do like getting a quality massage because first, that's what it's supposed to be provided and what I look for primarily, and second, because I prefer not to be with a person who can hurt my body for not knowing what they are doing. I have posted good, bad and surprising experiences with massage providers. In my case, the one that turned out quite sexual was the one where I was the least expecting it (since it was in a mainstream hotel with spa services). Also, some providers advertise in the massage website, but in the booking conversation, some have made offers to upsale some extras. In my experience it has been a mixed of factors, involving what the provider offers, what he's willing to do, the hints we give to each other, the chemistry between us, and the level of experience that we both have. I can't speak for others, so I do not know how "kinky" the get. I hope this helps.