Quartz

It’s because your delivery is atrocious (and you know it) 
You enjoy being trite. 
You also enjoy acting surprised when someone calls you out on it. 
 
 

I pulled the trigger and booked him back in December. He was as hot as he looked in photos, amazing muscles to feel, and have an extraordinarily tight ass.
However, my experience was a little negative but that could just be me. He didn’t get hard the entire time, even while I was sucking him off for a bit, which makes me feel unattractive or that he wasn’t into me, which eventually made me lose my own boner. His kisses were just ok and weren’t passionate.
When I eventually climaxed, I wanted to cuddle post-orgasm but he had gotten up immediately to wash up.
I didn’t specifically mention I wanted a BFE, so maybe that’s my fault. It was also my first time hiring a provider so I didn’t know what to expect or knew what I want.
YMMV and you might have a good time. He was an excellent conversationalist in person though and very friendly. I should’ve asked that we chat for a bit early on in the session before we got right down to business, but in a way, that would feel like I’m dictating the entire session blow by blow.

I bet a big percentage of guys chatting with your partner are Asians themselves ! 
Before Grindr etc there was gay.com chat in the 90s. I experimented on some of those channels by creating profiles with identical physical stats, but different races. Guess which profile attracted most chats? 
This is not exclusive to gay dating or escorting. Similar experiments have been done by researchers with professional resumes also and the results are similar.
Yes, it is a fact of life. We have to accept it and move on. There is no one to blame and it's no one's fault. 
It took hundreds of thousands of years for humans to look different after we left our common ancestral land in equatorial Africa. But now we are connected and mixing and matching. It will take an equal amount of time for us to look alike or, at least, to see everyone the same way,  if we are still around.

I can relate to this as an Asian guy. I don’t think I’m bad looking, but I struggle to pull in dates from Grindr and related apps, whereas my friend who’s white has dates lined up literally every day in a single week, sometimes twice in a single day. (He had just undergone a breakup and was diving headfirst into the dating pool.)
My partner who’s also white has more frequent chats with people from Grindr than me. I’ve grown to accept this pecking order in American society and be content with the quality few friends I’ve made through the apps, but it doesn’t mean it doesn’t sting when I see non-Asian friends who have significantly more successes meeting on the apps than I do.
It’s also why I’m starting to explore hiring tbh.

I can relate to this as an Asian guy. I don’t think I’m bad looking, but I struggle to pull in dates from Grindr and related apps, whereas my friend who’s white has dates lined up literally every day in a single week, sometimes twice in a single day. (He had just undergone a breakup and was diving headfirst into the dating pool.)
My partner who’s also white has more frequent chats with people from Grindr than me. I’ve grown to accept this pecking order in American society and be content with the quality few friends I’ve made through the apps, but it doesn’t mean it doesn’t sting when I see non-Asian friends who have significantly more successes meeting on the apps than I do.
It’s also why I’m starting to explore hiring tbh.

I can relate to this as an Asian guy. I don’t think I’m bad looking, but I struggle to pull in dates from Grindr and related apps, whereas my friend who’s white has dates lined up literally every day in a single week, sometimes twice in a single day. (He had just undergone a breakup and was diving headfirst into the dating pool.)
My partner who’s also white has more frequent chats with people from Grindr than me. I’ve grown to accept this pecking order in American society and be content with the quality few friends I’ve made through the apps, but it doesn’t mean it doesn’t sting when I see non-Asian friends who have significantly more successes meeting on the apps than I do.
It’s also why I’m starting to explore hiring tbh.

I can relate to this as an Asian guy. I don’t think I’m bad looking, but I struggle to pull in dates from Grindr and related apps, whereas my friend who’s white has dates lined up literally every day in a single week, sometimes twice in a single day. (He had just undergone a breakup and was diving headfirst into the dating pool.)
My partner who’s also white has more frequent chats with people from Grindr than me. I’ve grown to accept this pecking order in American society and be content with the quality few friends I’ve made through the apps, but it doesn’t mean it doesn’t sting when I see non-Asian friends who have significantly more successes meeting on the apps than I do.
It’s also why I’m starting to explore hiring tbh.

I pulled the trigger and booked him back in December. He was as hot as he looked in photos, amazing muscles to feel, and have an extraordinarily tight ass.
However, my experience was a little negative but that could just be me. He didn’t get hard the entire time, even while I was sucking him off for a bit, which makes me feel unattractive or that he wasn’t into me, which eventually made me lose my own boner. His kisses were just ok and weren’t passionate.
When I eventually climaxed, I wanted to cuddle post-orgasm but he had gotten up immediately to wash up.
I didn’t specifically mention I wanted a BFE, so maybe that’s my fault. It was also my first time hiring a provider so I didn’t know what to expect or knew what I want.
YMMV and you might have a good time. He was an excellent conversationalist in person though and very friendly. I should’ve asked that we chat for a bit early on in the session before we got right down to business, but in a way, that would feel like I’m dictating the entire session blow by blow.

I agree with most responses. I don’t particularly value a 4-hand massage for myself. It’s not worth the money. It can be distracting or less relaxing at best. I have a hard enough time not criticizing in my head during a 2-hand massage, much less a 4-hand.
My clients, on the other hand, love it. Some say they enjoy an asymmetrical approach because they like not knowing what is going to happen next, and enjoy the feeling of simultaneous differing sensations and muscle manipulation along different parts of the body. You get twice the work done.
To each their own. Every client is different. I recommend masseurs work together with people they know and trust for 4-hand sessions. Does not have to be a partner or lover. Even better when your styles are similar and you talk about how to coordinate the work beforehand. Styles can be different and still successful as long as you coordinate who does what when and make sure it makes sense.

I’ve generally been a top but I’m curious about trying bottoming again. The last time I bottomed a while back was with someone with a small tool, and that was an amazing experience.
I know I’m probably not like many other clients, but I’d be interested in hiring a provider in NYC who has a small or below average dick. Does such a provider exist, and if so, could you recommend them? I know those with big dicks are usually more in demand but I would not interested in them.
Thanks!

I’ve generally been a top but I’m curious about trying bottoming again. The last time I bottomed a while back was with someone with a small tool, and that was an amazing experience.
I know I’m probably not like many other clients, but I’d be interested in hiring a provider in NYC who has a small or below average dick. Does such a provider exist, and if so, could you recommend them? I know those with big dicks are usually more in demand but I would not interested in them.
Thanks!

Thanks everyone for taking the time to respond! Four hands doesn’t seem as appealing to me, based on your responses, so I’ll stick with two hands for now.
And @Jamie21, that 10 hands session sounds like quite a handful (ha)!

Thanks everyone for taking the time to respond! Four hands doesn’t seem as appealing to me, based on your responses, so I’ll stick with two hands for now.
And @Jamie21, that 10 hands session sounds like quite a handful (ha)!

Thanks everyone for taking the time to respond! Four hands doesn’t seem as appealing to me, based on your responses, so I’ll stick with two hands for now.
And @Jamie21, that 10 hands session sounds like quite a handful (ha)!

If you are seeking a lot of skilled work in from two men, you’ll have to ask them questions about training etc, how long they’ve worked as a team. Many 4-handers are provided by one good masseur and a boyfriend who’s pretty new at it. I found the two asymmetric “flows” to be a distraction. My experience is that who’s into you and who’s not will be evident in short order. I imagine others here can provide you with more things to consider to get what you’re hoping for. 

I’ve done 4 hands for clients many times, even a couple of 6 hands. First thing to say is it’s expensive because you’ve hired two masseurs. 
I do it with a few other masseurs who I trust and who I like working with. It’s a better experience for the client if you work with someone you’re compatible with so if you’re a client booking a 4 hands choose a masseur you like and then ask him to pick the other guy (or masseuse depending on what you like!). 
I did a 2 hour 4 hands session recently for a guy. It was with a masseur I know (we have similar styles) and we worked head / feet ends and side by side at various times. Overall I think it worked fine and the client loved it but in general most 4 hands last an hour and progress quickly because the client tends to not want much massage. They want fun with two guys so it usually develops into more of an escort session very quickly. 
I’d recommend that better value for money is had by getting a 2 hand massage. There’s too much going on with a 4 hands, it’s difficult to relax into it and unless the 2 masseurs are super coordinated it can feel disjointed. 
I once did a 10 hands, not for a paying client - it was with friends. The guy on the table was anxious about it. I think my friend who had arranged it was keen to do it and had talked the body (the recipient) into it, but he found it difficult to lay there and get massaged by 5 guys. 

There simply wasn’t enough room around the table and everyone was doing different things in different ways. You couldn’t call it a massage, it was a group grope session. The poor guy couldn’t get hard and had to stop after half hour. He got dressed and left!
More hands definitely doesn’t make a better massage. I think the law of diminishing returns comes in after two hands. 
 

 
 

I've had a few of these in the past. In general there are two different styles. Style one is where the two providers work on either side in unison. As long as the providers are equally proficient, this can feel really good but if one is weaker than the other, it is a bit of a bummer.
The other style which I prefer is where one partner takes care of the lower half and the other takes care of the upper half. They may even switch from time to time. This gives you the opportunity to blow the provider while still getting massaged. If one person is less capable in massage, you won't notice it.
In general, unless they will be having a "3-way" with you at the end, a single masseur is a better use of your fuck dollar if you just want to have a decent massage.

I would imagine that for most everyone the first time isn't going to be on script.
Navigating any human interaction takes experience and there's always unexpected events.
 You either take the session as your provider wishes, or you spell out a "blow by blow".
After a few meets you will find someone who checks all the boxes. This sounds like a good start, even if it wasn't perfection. Better luck next time !

I pulled the trigger and booked him back in December. He was as hot as he looked in photos, amazing muscles to feel, and have an extraordinarily tight ass.
However, my experience was a little negative but that could just be me. He didn’t get hard the entire time, even while I was sucking him off for a bit, which makes me feel unattractive or that he wasn’t into me, which eventually made me lose my own boner. His kisses were just ok and weren’t passionate.
When I eventually climaxed, I wanted to cuddle post-orgasm but he had gotten up immediately to wash up.
I didn’t specifically mention I wanted a BFE, so maybe that’s my fault. It was also my first time hiring a provider so I didn’t know what to expect or knew what I want.
YMMV and you might have a good time. He was an excellent conversationalist in person though and very friendly. I should’ve asked that we chat for a bit early on in the session before we got right down to business, but in a way, that would feel like I’m dictating the entire session blow by blow.

I pulled the trigger and booked him back in December. He was as hot as he looked in photos, amazing muscles to feel, and have an extraordinarily tight ass.
However, my experience was a little negative but that could just be me. He didn’t get hard the entire time, even while I was sucking him off for a bit, which makes me feel unattractive or that he wasn’t into me, which eventually made me lose my own boner. His kisses were just ok and weren’t passionate.
When I eventually climaxed, I wanted to cuddle post-orgasm but he had gotten up immediately to wash up.
I didn’t specifically mention I wanted a BFE, so maybe that’s my fault. It was also my first time hiring a provider so I didn’t know what to expect or knew what I want.
YMMV and you might have a good time. He was an excellent conversationalist in person though and very friendly. I should’ve asked that we chat for a bit early on in the session before we got right down to business, but in a way, that would feel like I’m dictating the entire session blow by blow.

Does anyone have any experience with this provider? https://rent.men/Jared_Cross
I’d be curious to hear more about your experience!

I pulled the trigger and booked him back in December. He was as hot as he looked in photos, amazing muscles to feel, and have an extraordinarily tight ass.
However, my experience was a little negative but that could just be me. He didn’t get hard the entire time, even while I was sucking him off for a bit, which makes me feel unattractive or that he wasn’t into me, which eventually made me lose my own boner. His kisses were just ok and weren’t passionate.
When I eventually climaxed, I wanted to cuddle post-orgasm but he had gotten up immediately to wash up.
I didn’t specifically mention I wanted a BFE, so maybe that’s my fault. It was also my first time hiring a provider so I didn’t know what to expect or knew what I want.
YMMV and you might have a good time. He was an excellent conversationalist in person though and very friendly. I should’ve asked that we chat for a bit early on in the session before we got right down to business, but in a way, that would feel like I’m dictating the entire session blow by blow.

And do you also try to get guys who insist on using condoms to disregard their health and forego the condom with you? If you really have to ask why someone wears a mask in this line of work, you are seriously delusional.

He actually had 20+ positive reviews on RM (I used a VPN so I saw some of the positive comments alongside the ratings), though I did read some mixed reviews on here. It might have been an error in judgment on my part to proceed, but I thought that it's impossible for anyone to have 100% perfect reviews, so the occasional mixed review, balanced with the 20+ positive ones on RM, makes sense. But perhaps the RM reviews could be fake?
And thank you! Now that I had my first experience hiring a provider, I do know now what I want or find enjoyment out of and not just the actual sex, even though that's fun too.
I'm wondering how I could screen for guys who enjoy giving pleasure and being with a variety of men. Are there certain keywords that providers would use on their profile, or something I could ask?
Thank you so much for sharing your perspective! I'd have liked to be made to feel special haha. But you're right, an hour is probably not enough, though I couldn't afford more than that at the moment.
Interestingly, I've heard that the fantasy leading up to the actual event is often hotter than the deed, but I guess it's often luck of the draw on the actual experience we'd get.
And thanks for the kind words. I'm actually in NYC as well.  I guess I can't force chemistry, but thanks for the tip about slowing things down for a few minutes to get to know each other a little. I'll keep that in mind.
Thank you for the kind sentiments! I wasn't planning on hiring frequently, maybe just once or twice a year, so I guess I was expecting too much as a newbie. This is a learning experience nonetheless!
The provider was in his late 20s, but I'll see if I can find someone else a little older in the future who would be more experienced.
I actually did ask him before meeting up if he would be into getting facefucked, and he said yes. But perhaps that had set the tone of having the entire session as sex-focused and nothing else.
Now that I know what I'm looking for, or what I think would be an enjoyable experience for me, I'll make it clearer in the future.

I recently hired someone for the first time, and I left feeling a little disappointed.
I had mentioned to him via chat that I wanted to explore face fucking him, and topping him after. In retrospect, I guess I didn’t know what I want and wanted more of the boyfriend experience that eventually leads to sex.
We started off the session almost immediately with sex. What ended up happening was him simply lying in bed while I did the majority of the work. I kissed him, but his kisses were not passionate. I sucked him off, but he was soft the entire time. Eventually I lost my hard-on when I realized (at least in my view at the time) that he probably wasn’t attracted to me, based on how foreplay went, but the least he could do was pretend to be interested.
The sex ended in 30 minutes after I came, and he then immediately got up to use the bathroom and wear his underwear. I would’ve liked to stay in the bedroom and do some post-coital chats and cuddles, but instead, we ended up in his living room not cuddling, and sat side by side talking. He had made indirect hints as if the session was over, but I told him I’d like to chat since there was still 30 minutes left.
That chat was nice! I felt like I enjoyed the chat more as it was more intimate than the sex. And I guess what I desired was also intimacy.
I just needed to get this off my chest. I know he can’t read my mind, but I wish that he could’ve guessed or even asked what I like. Should I have planned out the whole hour in a detailed fashion? I had wanted it to be a little more organic.
That feeling or perception from me that he didn’t find me attractive didn’t make me feel very good, judging by how soft he was during the entire half an hour of sex. Is that normal for a provider that bottoms? I’d have liked him to cum.
I’m just wondering how I could ensure I’ll have a better experience next time if I were to hire someone again. Would you have any tips for me?
If it matters at all, I’m Asian. I’ve read studies and heard that Asian men aren’t typically desired in Western countries, and that probably contributes to the occasional hit in self-esteem.