Simon Suraci

Cash is king and always will be. It’s the only truly private way to pay. In this biz, privacy and discretion are paramount to a large percentage of our client base. It’s frustrating mainstream business is slowly doing away with cash, like restaurants that only accept digital payments, and some Target locations only provide one self checkout machine (of 8+) that accepts cash. Like it’s some huge bother. While doing some grocery shopping the other day at Trader Joe’s, a Gen Z cashier looked terrified at the sight of cash, like she didn’t know what to do with it. She also did not know what 6x8 was without using a calculator. She asked the bagger, and she (also Gen Z) didn’t know either. Troubling. I gave another Gen Z cashier a $100 bill for a large purchase last year. This bill was printed in the 80s or 90s and had the older style design. He thought it was fake. His manager had to come over and make a scene educating him about how different ways currency looks over the decades. So embarrassing.

Oh! Duh, I should add to the list of items defining my favorite clients: REVIEWS. Not all of my favorite clients write reviews, for many valid reasons I respect. However, reviews certainly make me value my clients even more. Reviews are an important part of almost any successful contemporary business. Clients taking time to leave a thoughtful positive review are worth their weight in gold. For some, that’s a LOT of gold lol! I’m not afraid of less than stellar reviews either because it shows a range of experience. It’s unrealistic to please every client 100% every single time. If I satisfy most of them most of the time, I’m doing pretty darn good. Quality of reviews matters too. It’s one thing to put 5 stars and say “He was good”, or “I had a good time”. Those are welcome and matter for sure, but it’s much better to put a few specifics, however brief they may be, like: “He put me at ease right away, and alleviated my shoulder pain. His space is calm and welcoming. Simon used the perfect pressure.” I just made that one up as an example. One of my clients earlier this year not only wrote a kind, thoughtful, genuine, and thorough review, but he went out of his way to post it to multiple platforms. This client went waaay above and beyond. He’s a rare gem. I really like seeing him. Can’t wait until our next couple of sessions scheduled on my tour this summer. To reciprocate my appreciation, I made a special offer for him. It’s important to me that reviews are genuine i.e. no quid pro quo behind the scenes. I don’t ask for reviews or incentivize them in any way. All of my reviews are genuine, because the client decided he wanted to leave one. That makes for more valuable reviews. I may have fewer reviews than many others, but what I do have is the real deal.

Can you provide some examples on what posts we should be reporting? i.e. personal attacks, off topic discussions, slurs & name calling, trolling, etc. The site guidelines are a great resource, but it would help to have something here in this thread. Linking those guidelines here: Company of Men Guidelines

Here are the basics, for any client: 1. Pay your provider his rate. You’re not obligated to tip, but please don’t attempt to negotiate down. Most people on this forum get it. Not everyone does. 2. Show up on time. When you have something come up, tell him that you can’t make it and then make every effort to reschedule when possible. A heads up when you know you’re running late helps. Ghosting and no-showing are unacceptable behaviors. Occasionally, your time may be cut a bit short when we have something scheduled right afterwards and you’re late. We providers owe clients the same courtesies, by the way. It’s a two way street. 3. Respect your provider. Stick to whatever boundaries he sets, or move on if those boundaries don’t fit what you want. Treat your provider as a human being, in the same way you want to be treated. 4. Communicate what you want. We can’t read minds or be ready for any scenario at any time. For example, we can’t retroactively douche when it’s clear in the moment you want to top but you never said anything about topping before the meeting. If kissing is important to you, ask about it upfront. And so on… 5. Book the services you actually want and develop realistic expectations of cost for those services based on going rates in your market. Do not expect full service for the typical going rates for a massage, for example. Or book an escort and expect him to deliver a top quality professional massage. 6. Maintain good hygiene. Wash your body before an appointment, including your bits and your ass, even if you’re not bottoming. Brush your teeth, and if you can’t do so in the hours before, at least use a bit of mouthwash. Some providers keep mouthwash on hand, so feel free to ask. My favorite clients: A. Tip. This is rewarding and motivating for us. Money trumps a lot of other things on these lists. We overlook a host of other things for good tippers. B. Frequently book. If not in the same city, they book me whenever they are in my city. I know it’s fun to try a new guy every month/week/day or whatever your budget allows for, but having regulars in your rotation gets you truly excellent experiences. Loyalty goes a long way. It motivates us to go the extra mile for you in terms of time and effort. I pick up loyal regulars from the airport or go to dinner with them without charging for my time, or arrange for threesomes with other providers for them, or give them my sexy underwear for their collection, or do extra stuff that takes time and effort and money to do that I don’t charge for. Never these for a new or infrequent client. C. Respect me. D. Maintain boundaries around the relationship. It’s ok to be friendly, be passionate, even have a serious crush. You can get quite personal, over time. But it stops there. I’m not your real boyfriend or husband. I’m there to make you feel amazing for a period of time, for a fee. Never forget that. E. Show appreciation in non monetary ways. A simple, genuine “Thank You” and a hug go a long way. F. Trust me. G. Give as much notice as possible for setting, rescheduling, or canceling appointments. H. Follow through.

I’m top/versatile. I have only a few pics featuring my ass and I don’t post them to every profile, or they are in a private album. Those usually aren’t the first pics I send when a client inquires for more pics. It’s been a challenge at times getting something together for a top client to peruse when he asks. I probably lose a few top clients by not featuring my ass more prominently, but I often wonder how many more bottom clients I would lose by featuring more of my ass. It’s a challenge appealing to tops and bottoms. Bottoms often want you to be a “total top”, and sometimes the opposite for tops, but it varies. The idea of topping a top can be exciting for some. Remember: sex is about power exchange. This tension between appealing to a wide audience vs appeasing a narrow slice is one of the many reasons why sex workers sometimes list “ask me” in the position category. It’s why we display photos of one aspect of our bodies and not the other. Some of us are truly top only or bottom only, but most of us fall somewhere between those two, even if it’s a small percentage of one vs the other. I can’t tell you how many clients identify as total tops but after seeing me they enjoy bottoming (at least for me). Labels are just labels. Sometimes life experience happens and what you thought was fixed isn’t anymore, and you’re better off because of it. Plenty of members here disagree with me on that point, and they will die on a hill over being only ever a top til death, amen. Fine. Agree to disagree. My experience tells me that the key to a fulfilling sex life is openness and a willingness to try different things with different people. This week in Dallas I did a photo shoot with my favorite photographer. Should be at least a few weeks away, but y’all can look forward to some more juicy pics on my ads soon, including more cock and more ass. Plus all the regular shots that play into my “brand” (if you want to call it that). Some say I’m a guy next door. Or guy next floor (in cities). Others say I’m a wholesome hooker. Hopefully we captured it. 🤞

It varies for me. It takes more time, focus and attention on my cock to get/stay hard when I am getting fucked. Depends on the top too, how well we know each other, how he goes about his business, his patience, and if he is attentive to my pleasure too (that last one is not always a given). A lot of times I am totally flaccid, leaking precum, and enjoying it! My erection comes and goes, unrelated to level of pleasure and arousal. Other times I am rock hard and keeping his hands away while he thrusts because I will explode prematurely with even a small bit of stimulation. Simultaneous orgasm is more common with my clients and I than others here suggest. Varies quite a bit but certainly in the realm of possibility, especially if I can edge while fucking him, kind of in a holding pattern until he is ready to shoot, then I go for it, assuming that’s what he wants. Recently I gave a client multiple anal orgasms and when I asked if he wanted to cum he said he was exhausted and satisfied and didn’t want/need to cum i.e. “ejaculate” in the traditional way. He said the experience was even better than cumming. Did you know you can have non-ejaculatory orgasms? And multiple of those, and minutes long orgasms? It takes a long time to develop this skill, but it’s possible. Life changing. Some clients hire me for coaching on this topic.

I wish she would own up to her horrible behavior, apologize, and take steps to be better. She doesn’t think she’s done anything wrong, like she’s the victim. She’s so out of touch.

I’m your man, right here. Based in SoCal. I advertise as a masseur and an escort and I am good at both. It’s not just one service lumped into the other as an afterthought as is so commonly the case. As far as pricing goes, I would not mind the client rimming me, and I would not charge extra for it. I would, however, expect the client to communicate his needs when booking so that I can allocate adequate time beforehand to make sure I am fresh and ready to be rimmed. I would also expect the client to tip more generously because the service the client is asking for goes well above the call of duty for a masseur. There may be no penetration, but it’s still some level of escort service. Not everyone who hires escort service wants penetration, but that doesn’t mean it’s not escort service. Clients who don’t tip for going the extra mile I’m less inclined to go said mile the next time around. I don’t distinguish my pricing between therapeutic and erotic since almost all my clients want and expect at least a minimal amount of erotic contact during their sessions. How far they want that erotic level to go is up to them. Regardless of the erotic elements, the client still gets a focused, therapeutic massage in a reasonable range of $150/hr. The rest is a value-added bonus. The lines can get blurry at times, but I do draw some limits. I can’t offer oral and/or penetration to everyone for a regular massage fee. It’s simply unsustainable to operate this way. It might be other things like someone wanting a lot of spanking, fetish play, kissing, or what have you. There are no codified limits as to what the boundaries are. When I sense the client wants and needs a lot more than I can provide for a massage fee, I suggest after the session is over that they book a combo massage / escort session, or an escort session the next time. That way I don’t need to hold back at all. We just go for it. Everyone is happy.

Me: Been to any concerts lately? Client: Well, I want to see Willie Nelson, but he’s on the road Me: Again?! Client: Yeah, seems he’s always touring outside of Austin… Me: *dying inside…*

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Yes, geography unfortunately limits who can see whom. I keep running lists of clients in different cities, both regular and prospective. I have quite a few interested CoM members in the NYC area, for example, even though I’ve yet to make a work trip there yet. My prospective client list in NYC influences me to travel there in the future. Same for other places. I encourage clients to reach out privately to providers they like. You never know when they will be near your area. Having enough interest in a given area brings us to places we might not otherwise visit. I’ve been to cities because a CoM member wanted to see me there and now I have regular contacts in those cities that keep bringing me back.

I’m sure it will be much easier and more popular to view info on providers, including those active on the site, once the review features go live. You will have to ask the site developer for status. Posting relevant links below: Until the review features go live, anyone interested in me can find more about me on CoM including one linked review here: We’re not in cahoots with the site. If anything, us being here holds clients accountable because we can correct misinformation and clarify the facts. It’s easy to write a trite, nasty, anonymous review right after having an appointment or interaction that didn’t go as you wanted it to go (for whatever reasons). It’s more difficult to justify your behavior when a provider clarifies the facts and puts what you say into context. We’re human too. We won’t be perfect with every client or every time. Being here is an opportunity to own up to our shortcomings and publicly make things right, which inspires trust. Personally I view my involvement here as part fun, and part marketing. I receive quite a lot of business directly or indirectly due to my being active here. A professional in another field might attend a conference, write an article in a journal, or go to a cocktail party with industry insiders as some different ways to approach business development. This site is some version of the same type of thing, but for our field.

What I hear is the client asking an escort for typical escort services, and the escort saying he is uncomfortable providing said escort services because it violates his personal code of ethics. That is why I find this question so puzzling. I’ll let this be my last post on the matter too.

@ICTJOCK you do you, whatever you are comfortable doing. I am an escort. That kind of thing is escorting. It find it acceptable for me to escort. Maybe we are confusing “sex work” with “escorting”. Oftentimes we use these terms and their respective nouns interchangeably, but they aren’t the same, at least not traditionally. An escort can also be a sex worker (and frequently is). Some sex workers are not escorts in the traditional sense of offering companionship services like accompanying their clients to events and doing activities together in public. Escorts are comfortable being whoever their clients want them to be in public. That aspect of the job delivers value to the client because not everyone will be comfortable with it or do it successfully. I might suggest you are a sex worker, and not an escort, at least not in the traditional sense of the term escort. And that’s ok. You don’t have to be both. Other members please do chime in if you disagree, particularly on the underlined point. I find the differences in thought about this topic fascinating.

Whether the client presents you as a casual date or an intimate, what the client is asking for here is truly traditional escort service. I am puzzled that an escort would be uncomfortable…escorting. That’s the beauty of hiring. Get whatever fantasy you want. Sometimes that fantasy is being at a party feeling like a million bucks because you have a guy you like on your arm, or you on his. All it takes is a little role play and tact. Lots of “Yes-and”. Not so different in that respect than role play you might do naked in a bedroom. It’s on the client to prepare a backstory and details to help keep the narrative consistent. If anything goes south on account of these finer points, the client needs to take responsibility for it. Usually he is introducing you to acquaintances rather than close friends or family, so it’s unlikely you will get the third degree interrogation you might expect from people closer to the client. As far as ethics…I would question whether deceiving others in this scene is any different than facilitating someone cheating on their spouse. In that case, we may as well hire private investigators to screen out all would-be married/attached Johns. Then we would be out of a job because the PI costs so much, and so few legitimately single guys would be left in the pool to hire us. It’s a slippery slope. Let the client make their own ethical decisions. We can’t make those on behalf of our clients, just like we can’t be responsible for their health or how they spend their money. At the end of the day, they will hire someone to fulfill their fantasy. Whether you choose to benefit financially by engaging them is your decision. Passing them by doesn’t change their actions. It just changes who they hire. We can’t be a client’s moral compass.

I have pretty much the same experience as @Jamie21 above. After a few rounds of nonsense, perhaps over months or years, I call them out directly and it makes the problem go away for good.

Will you be accepting gifts?

One rather enthusiastic client reviewed me several times. 4x in the screencap below plus two more at later dates. What can I say? He was really happy with my service! So far I have received no other duplicate reviews. One recent client was very kind to post the same review across multiple platforms. You all are right to have your fraud detectors on high alert, but once in a while a legit client leaves multiple genuine reviews. It’s not always fraud.

Me: guilty as charged… Now please get out the handcuffs.

But would you have hired him in the first place had you seen more current photos? The world may never know…

That’s horrible providers respond to you this way. Pervasive ignorance around disabilities makes life much harder. I see clients with disabilities, both physical and neurodivergent. One of my regulars has cerebral palsy. Another is on the autism spectrum. One has parkinson’s disease. Some others use a wheelchair, cane, or other assistive devices for various conditions. My studio is not 100% accessible by California standards, but I chose it in part because it has accessibility features. Everyone benefits because it makes things easier to use, whether you have a disability or not. My architect background informs so much of what I do! I like my disabled clients and want them to feel comfortable and welcome. Any provider worth your time will do the same. Disabled clients want escort services and massages the same as everyone else. I see accommodating them no differently than accommodating other needs and preferences. I help them on and off the table, transferring to the shower, and getting dressed. Many times they don’t want help with things like getting dressed, as this is a way for them to maintain their autonomy. In that case I allow more time for them to do what they need to do, and remain patient while a client does tasks a little slower than others. Andrew Gurza puts out a lot of interesting content around being gay and disabled. He talks frankly about sexuality and openly about hiring. Anyone interested in these topics might check out his podcast Disability After Dark. Disabilities manifest in so many different ways. You don’t always know by looking at someone that they are disabled. My partner, for instance, suffers from many chronic conditions. I won’t get into it all of the medical specifics here, but basically he has physical limitations, like he can’t sit, stand, walk, or drive for long periods. No step ladders or anything requiring balance or significant coordination. No heavy lifting. He works half time from home because that’s the most he is able to do. He spends a lot of his time recovering from physical exertion, even from basic daily life activities when he pushes himself too hard. You would never tell by meeting him for a few minutes or passing by him in a grocery store. He started using a cane recently, so maybe you would see that, but he is embarrassed to use it outside our home. He’s only 43 years old. We need more compassion and understanding toward one another. This work requires empathy, respect, and adaptability. We serve everyone. Online we focus so much on how different we are on the surface. At the end of the day, we’re all just people. People with people needs. I may not be saving the world, but approaching this work the way I do gives me a strong sense of purpose. Good providers will not shun clients with disabilities. Try to shake off cruel commentary as best you can. Keep looking. We exist, and we care.

Overnights are different for everyone. You, the client, communicate what you want and what you expect. Your provider will propose a fee, a timeframe, and you go from there to land on a mutually agreeable arrangement. Typical overnights are around 12 hours, sometimes a bit less, sometimes a bit more. Baseline: 9pm-9am. Maybe start earlier or end later. You negotiate and agree on expectations ahead of time in terms of duration, activities in bed, activities outside of bed, how much (if any) sleep you expect to get, sleeping arrangements, and the fee. You might start early evening with dinner, maybe cocktails, or whatever relaxation activity floats your boat. See a movie, visit an art show, go to the beach, dance at a club, play video games, go shopping, whatever the client wants based on his interests. A lot of times it looks like a traditional nice dinner date. You talk, you flirt, you connect. Some of my clients like me to give them a massage, body scrub, and manscaping in addition to, or instead of, meals or other going out activities. It can look however you want. Then the really fun part. Usually one or more rounds of sexual activities you like, often going into the wee hours. It could last from 2-4 hours, maybe more, depending on a few factors. You might break these romps up with snacks, laying in one another’s arms, talking, watching a show, or what have you. For some of you kinky bitches, these can be pretty long, drawn out, and elaborate sessions. Maybe others join (arranged ahead), but usually just 1:1. Then some sleep. Perhaps only a few hours. Maybe 6-8 if the client is satisfied with plenty of action the night before and the morning after. You might like to sleep cuddled up with your provider. Or in an adjacent hotel bed, or in completely separate rooms at your home, or whatever works best for you both. Some clients want and expect their provider to stay up all night. That’s ok too, but please do communicate your expectations up front. Most of us can’t go for 5-10 hours at a time just having sex, and not everyone will be good company staying up that late. There’s a natural limit. Drugs are another matter, however. If you want to party, be sure to find a compatible provider and be upfront with your expectations. After some nap time, you might wake up to your man initiating another round of sex. Morning wood is raging. Things happen. Then coffee/tea, breakfast, more chatter, showering, and getting dressed. Maybe you skip breakfast and go out for brunch. Pay your provider, and he’s on his way!

He advertises with a pro profile on A4A, although does not indicate massage, more like RentMen services. Lists his age there as 37, also: Bi, Vers, HIV-, BB, on PreP. He’s also an EmScuplt tech (a type of body contouring).