Thoughts on Meet and Greets before hiring?

[+ freecahill1965]

I was curious as to how providers/escorts feel about meet or greets i.e. being invited to a lunch or dinner before being hired. Do you tend to accept or decline? What are your thoughts on them?

Edited March 5, 2018 by freecahill1965

[FTM Zachary Prince]

Who doesn’t LOVE being invited to work for free??!

[Zapped]

Exactly! Look, I’m a client. I pay for an escort’s time. Usually what I want to do with most of that time ... well, it isn’t talking.

 

There are a lot of people I do business with that I enjoy working with, but you’d have to pay me to have lunch or dinner with them.

 

In any professional relationship, two people may connect and decide to share a meal. Sometimes escorts will accept a meal after a session, and in those cases it would be because the escort actually enjoys being with the client outside of that work zone.

 

A meal off the clock before a first session? Doubt that ever happens, or if it does, only rarely.

[+ tassojunior]

A quick Facetime is a fair request.

 

If refused, some of us have started saying we would prefer meeting outside and reserve the right to cancel with a certain amount fee ($50-$100). The guys who are worth it shouldn't mind as they will pass inspection. Surprisingly they often do though while the fakes accept just to get the cancel fee. Of course someone who is known in these parts and well-mentioned would be ok.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

Who doesn’t LOVE being invited to work for free??!

 

I couldn't have said it any better myself

[bigvalboy]

Who doesn’t LOVE being invited to work for free??!

Curious...Are you suggesting, trust but don't verify?

[phraughy]

I was curious as to how providers/escorts feel about meet or greets i.e. being invited to a lunch or dinner before being hired. Do you tend to accept or decline? What are your thoughts on them?

I can not imagine any escort agreeing to meet for free for lunch or dinner. We are paying them for their time. 5 minutes on the phone is all I need to know if I am comfortable. Besides, I'd much rather schedule an overnight and cook a nice meal.

[maninsoma]

I can not imagine any escort agreeing to meet for free for lunch or dinner. We are paying them for their time. 5 minutes on the phone is all I need to know if I am comfortable. Besides, I'd much rather schedule an overnight and cook a nice meal.

 

I agree. I don't need a meet and greet to determine interest. Also, when meeting if the guy isn't who he purports to be in his ad, I don't feel wrong in turning around and walking away without paying anything. Why should I hand over money to someone who places an obviously false ad? I'm not talking about a subtle difference like maybe he's a bit less toned than the photos in his ad, but if the photos aren't even of the same person or if they are obviously from more than a decade ago, I don't feel obligated to pay the guy for his time in preparing for an appointment that didn't happen. If anything, he should pay me for wasting my time since he is the cause of the failure to complete the agreement.

[FTM Zachary Prince]

Curious...Are you suggesting, trust but don't verify?

 

By all means... please DO verify! Are you suggesting that there’s no way to verify an escort besides asking him to provide his companionship service for FREE?!

 

There are tons of ways to verify me, and all of them involve my potential clients taking the time to research me before booking. NONE of them involve me disrupting my life to provide free companionship services in order to convince someone that I’d be fun to fuck.

[Guest SimonL]

Usually I ask to meet in the lobby of hotel and am very up front in the communication to say that if they don't match their photos, I may elect to not proceed up to my room. I find that those not willing to do that are probably not being completely honest with their description. In regard to Grindr, Adam4Adam etc. I ask for the same neutral meeting place for the same reason --- of course they get the right of refusal too --- all that somewhat filters out the misrepresenters and gives the other guy an out which they deserve too. I always use my own recent pics but unfortunately other professionals and amateurs do not. My avatar is me . Please go easy on any review, I am human

[bigvalboy]

By all means... please DO verify! Are you suggesting that there’s no way to verify an escort besides asking him to provide his companionship service for FREE?!

 

There are tons of ways to verify me, and all of them involve my potential clients taking the time to research me before booking. NONE of them involve me disrupting my life to provide free companionship services in order to convince someone that I’d be fun to fuck.

 

Well that's where you and I disagree. Researching someone will only reveal so much about a person. I have invited dozens of escorts to a meet-n-greet at starbucks, and never once has anyone of them asked for compensation for that time, and in almost 40 years of hiring, dinner is almost always included in an evening of fun beforehand, and not once has anyone of them suggested to me that the hire starts at dinner which is on my dime, nor requested that they be paid for their time if I suggest a nice dinner afterwards.

 

Meet-N-Greets can be relieving. It's my money, and I want to make sure that we are going to be a good match, especially over the course of a weekend. Chemistry is often everything in a successful hire.

 

Met a nice kid a couple months back at a bar. After a brief conversation, he suggested that he spend a long weekend with me on the boat. I suggested dinner that night first, to make sure we would be a match. Half way through dinner, some vile racist comments slipped from his lips. I made it through dinner, called for the check, wished him well, and walked away realizing that it was the best hundred bucks I had ever spent. The weekend would have been an unmitigated disaster.

 

Every escort is free to conduct their business any way that suits them the best, and I am free to hire anyway that suits me best. It's my money, I'm the buyer. That might seem cold, but it's how I see it.

 

Sincerely wish you the best...

Edited March 6, 2018 by bigvalboy

[+ tassojunior]

I can understand why an escort does not want to spend extra time for dinner, etc for free. Totally understand. But what is the argument against say a quick Facetime showing face or clothed person from someone who shows they are really serious about a date? Especially with escorts who aren't pretty well-known? It seems like that would be easier than the right to cancel with a smaller fee that some of us are using sometimes.

 

So many people are so hesitant to hire because of the too-large number of scammers. And there's even the personal danger thing too. Thankfully most hotels where you would do an out-call have keycard elevators where the client has to meet the escort in the lobby or out front first. A few years back a client was murdered in the Donovan House here in DC by someone who turned out to be a young woman posing online as a young male in an ad.

 

And especially the many ads that we talk about here as being totally fake pictures of someone else makes clients wonder what the intended outcome is. Who is going to appear and what is their plan ? It really does hurt the market.

Edited March 6, 2018 by tassojunior

[FTM Zachary Prince]

Hey... I never said I don’t eat dinner with anyone for free. But it’s at my invitation, or perhaps at my discretion to accept an invitation if the chemistry is breezy and my schedule allows. Stranger who found me through my escort advertisement inviting me to accompany them to dinner = work. I’m an escort and companionship is how I earn a living. I don’t dress or behave the same with a client over dinner as I do with my friends who I smoke up and talk nonsense with and the companionship fee is there to compensate me for the difference.

 

But we agree on one point which is... to each his own! If the escorts you meet are thrilled to provide you with companionship for free then congratulations and I hope it stays drama-free and continues to work for you.

 

My clients don’t have a problem compensating me for dinner and it seems to be worth their while since they continue to do so again and again. There are things that you cant learn about me from verification that you CAN learn about me from dinner... that’s true... however I CHARGE for the privilege of getting to know me that way.

 

In my case, I am not just pretending to sell something besides sex because of the legality of it all. What I sell is my time and companionship. There is literally no reason for me to give my primary product away for free. I love sex and its a huge part of what I offer but the clock doesn’t start and end with sex.

 

Ultimately you’re gonna find a wide variety of opinions among escorts that fluctuate between mine and the ones of the guys who are happy to do lunches and dinners for free, but I’m guessing that the more experienced and professional escorts understand the value of their companionship too much to bother. There are plenty of clients out there who are ready to compensate us appropriately for our time.

[FTM Zachary Prince]

I can understand why an escort does not want to spend extra time for dinner, etc for free. Totally understand. But what is the argument against say a quick Facetime showing face or clothed person from someone who shows they are really serious about a date?

 

The argument is: there are literally guys who get off on just contacting us and wasting our time while they jerk off. The jerk-offs are the most likely ones to ask for live visuals like FaceTime. Suddenly we find ourselves non-consensually involved in someone else’s jerk-off session which we had to interrupt breakfast with our grandma, brush our teeth, and fix our hair to accommodate. How many times do you think a newbie escort puts up with that scenario before he learns that most serious clients are willing to book without such measures? Is it worth interrupting our lives, grooming ourselves, and giving uncompensated live performances on a regular basis to strangers who claim they MIGHT book us but are just jerking off 80% of the time to accommodate the 20% who might be serious? Depends on how desperate we are for business I guess. Or how naive. Or how patient. It’s all a matter of perspective... but surely you should be able to understand why someone would choose not to put up with this.

[+ tassojunior]

I certainly understand.

 

What one guy of mine has done is post a short video of himself on RM with a newspaper and shows the date of it and then him without a shirt. Works great.

[Rudynate]

I was curious as to how providers/escorts feel about meet or greets i.e. being invited to a lunch or dinner before being hired. Do you tend to accept or decline? What are your thoughts on them?

 

 

As a client, I wouldn't want to take the time for a meet and greet. And I wouldn't want to waste the escort's time. Years ago, when I was still in the labor market, if I was looking for a job, and a potential employer called to schedule an interview, I would always ask "Will I be meeting with the hiring authority?" If HR just wanted to talk to me for a screening interview, I would try to get them to agree to a telephone interview. If they wouldn't go for the phone interview, I would go in if I thought I really wanted the job. But if it was iffy, I just thanked them for their interest and told them that I didn't have time for an in-person screening interview.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

Ultimately you’re gonna find a wide variety of opinions among escorts that fluctuate between mine and the ones of the guys who are happy to do lunches and dinners for free, but I’m guessing that the more experienced and professional escorts understand the value of their companionship too much to bother. There are plenty of clients out there who are ready to compensate us appropriately for our time.

 

This.

 

You keep on hitting the mark. Very nicely stated

[bigvalboy]

but surely you should be able to understand why someone would choose not to put up with this.

 

Oh absolutely, and no one should be faulting you for operating your business model like that, certainly not I. We just disagree on the approach. There was another very successful escort who used to post here, Juan Vancouver, but unfortunately he seems to have vanished. Juan Vancouver who had tremendous insight, and wisdom into the escort side of things, and would often help guide new escorts. He got a lot of push back for expressing the same thoughts that you do, and I was among those who disagreed with him, and actually did not hire him based on his perspective, but I always supported his right to do whatever it was that worked for him.

 

During my working years, you could say that the tables were turned. I was selling a product, essentially myself, since there were any number of agents who could and would provide the identical service for the same amount of money. My goal was to convince a client that I was worth the money they were going to be paying me in the form of commissions. I was the seller, they the buyer. I spent countless free hours, talking with clients over lunch, dinner, out socially, trying to sell my services Sometimes I was successful, sometimes not. For me it was simply the cost of doing business. At the end of the day, Real estate, like many businesses is a numbers game, put yourself out there enough, "knock on enough doors", and eventually the positives outweigh the negatives. There were agents that would do absolutely nothing without being compensated, not a bit of information would be given for free. I was the opposite, I was extremely generous with my time and information...when all was said and done, that worked best for me.

Edited March 6, 2018 by bigvalboy

[Guest Listen for the pop]

WOW it’s interesting to hear that clients would even think to have a live meet and greet without compensation. I was shocked as Hell when one asked ME for a phone call.. Maybe it was because it was to be a travel overnight for the first meeting. I have also compensated without request, for too much time ( an arbitrary amount of time) spent emailing and/or texting that did not result in an actual hire. I have also done so AFTER the session if I felt like I was taking too much time out of their day. I like to remember ESCORTS ARE PEOPLE TOO! Perhaps this is a bad example, but lawyers will bill an hour for 10 minutes on the phone. Doctors bill insurance companies an hour for 15 minute appointments. I have only hired twice, and maybe I have just gotten lucky, but escorts are professionals. They/you deserve a “time-clock” just like everyone else. Even Walmart employees are not supposed to talk to patrons on their way to and from their break rooms! If you are willing to pay $X# for a little slap and tickle, pay them for finding out who they are! Think about how much time and money you would spend in a bar trying to pick someone up for a one nighter. That is easily $100 or more. Loosen the purse strings guys!

[KennF]

I think it is just the way the whole question is worded that makes me wonder.

 

Asking someone for a meet and greet for a short, or one time, encounter, is rude. Versus, asking someone for a meet and greet before an extended companionship (weekend, travel, etc.) that we've already started working out the details, doesn't seem totally out of line.

 

Asking someone for a meet and greet at a coffee shop at the escort's convenience because they are in the same area of town and we're already set up for an encounter later, not a big issue to me. Versus asking someone for a meet and greet at my convenience regardless of their schedule or before vetting, that's being a serious inconsiderate SOB.

 

In all cases, the escort is free to decline and the drinks/food is my dime.

 

For example, going on a week long cruise with someone new, already worked out the scheduling and some of the details, as well as when they're on the clock or off the clock, etc... and I ask, do you have time to grab a quick coffee this week, and we can firm up on some details... That doesn't seem totally out of line, or something that need a time card punched on.

 

Just my tuppence.

[RadioRob]

There are a couple of scenarios pointed out here.

 

1. Verification of the escort -- Do they look like the pictures? A 2-minute Facetime/Skype or recent pre-recorded video should be able to accurately show what the person looks like.

 

2. Figuring out if you will get along with a companion for a longer term engagement -- Book a couple of smaller sessions before hand to figure out if you click or not.

 

If I'm planning a longer getaway/trip and want someone by my side, I'm going to personally need more than just a "meet and greet" or dinner. I'll need to have had at least an overnight with the person. (Can they deal with my snoring? Does the escort fart in the middle of the night to the point of chasing me out of the room?) Before we get to the overnight, I'll typically have spent a couple of 1-2 hour sessions with them to see if we can click short-term.

 

In either scenario, I should not need an hour plus of someone's uncompensated time. Skype/Facetime will show if they look like they describe. If we're going to spend longer periods of time together, I'm already booking them on a smaller scale to figure out if we are going to fit as two peas in a pod.

[+ José Soplanucas]

If you are a client that would hire me for a whole week end and I were an escort, I would consider giving away my lunch/diner time for free. Specially if it is a first time and the meeting is some kind of job interview. Even if it is not a first time, even if he is a regular client, I would have no problem giving away some time now and then to keep him happy, given the fact I am getting thousands every time I am hired.

 

But I am a one hour client, maybe a couple of hours. I would never ever consider the possibility of asking for off the clock time. I have been fortunate and blessed by the generosity of some providers, but it was not because of my request. I am paying for hot action, not for company. I do not need to know much about my partner other than I am attracted to him. I do require a very short FaceTime or any videoconferencing mean, and that is enough to know whether or not there is chemistry.

[+ Pensant]

I always text first and then, if it looks promising, follow up with a phone call. I’ve never asked for a pre-meet, which I agree is a waste of the provider’s time. Since I prefer longer engagements, I consider the initial two hour session to be the compensated “interview”.

[Deadlift1]

I think it is just the way the whole question is worded that makes me wonder.

 

Asking someone for a meet and greet for a short, or one time, encounter, is rude. Versus, asking someone for a meet and greet before an extended companionship (weekend, travel, etc.) that we've already started working out the details, doesn't seem totally out of line.

 

Asking someone for a meet and greet at a coffee shop at the escort's convenience because they are in the same area of town and we're already set up for an encounter later, not a big issue to me. Versus asking someone for a meet and greet at my convenience regardless of their schedule or before vetting, that's being a serious inconsiderate SOB.

 

In all cases, the escort is free to decline and the drinks/food is my dime.

 

For example, going on a week long cruise with someone new, already worked out the scheduling and some of the details, as well as when they're on the clock or off the clock, etc... and I ask, do you have time to grab a quick coffee this week, and we can firm up on some details... That doesn't seem totally out of line, or something that need a time card punched on.

 

Just my tuppence.

[Deadlift1]