Are escorts acting or are they really authentic when meeting a client?

[+ glutes]

everytime o hire a guy to spend time with I wonder if he really feels comfortable with me or he's just acting a role, some of them can't stop looking at the clock "never again for me to hire them" some are completely nice but makes me confuse because I know it's hard to spend time with someone you don't know and never met before.

 

My opinion, of escorts are constantly acting a role, does it makes them natural actors or liers.

 

Anyway we have no choice when it comes to hire a beautiful man to spend time with and makes us happy with their presence but it can also be risky if we believe they are really into and we create the affection we can't get to feel for them because it's all about business.

 

You may want to look at this thread:

 

https://m4m-forum.org/threads/are-escorts-just-mere-actors.79047/

[+ Funguy]

Sure are a lot of cynical people here . . .

I like to think each and every escort I am with has a good time with me and likes me as a person (or at least, doesn't dislike me because I am just a client.) They don't have to be my best bud but if they have to put on a smile and slip into a new "persona" with each and every client, I think they would not be very happy in their profession. I think I am pretty aware when that happens and I simply chalk it up to chemistry and don't try to delve into the whys and wherefores. It really is not too difficult to figure out and I just don't re-hire. Fortunately, that has not happened for years and, as a few of you can attest, I am a hiring slut!

There are also a few escorts who let me know months in advance of when they will be able to see me - I don't think they just do it to fill time, but to fill time with someone they like to see. I hope.

[+ Lance_Navarro]

Sure are a lot of cynical people here . . .

I like to think each and every escort I am with has a good time with me and likes me as a person (or at least, doesn't dislike me because I am just a client.) They don't have to be my best bud but if they have to put on a smile and slip into a new "persona" with each and every client, I think they would not be very happy in their profession. I think I am pretty aware when that happens and I simply chalk it up to chemistry and don't try to delve into the whys and wherefores. It really is not too difficult to figure out and I just don't re-hire. Fortunately, that has not happened for years and, as a few of you can attest, I am a hiring slut!

There are also a few escorts who let me know months in advance of when they will be able to see me - I don't think they just do it to fill time, but to fill time with someone they like to see. I hope.

 

You got that right hun!

[LatinHunterbttm]

It is usually a win-win situation, don't think about it too much.

Right! I give them what they want and they give me what I want, simple, or are you going to tell me you want to make one of these guys your sugar babe because that's different but also needs to have way lot of money to afford one of these guys, believe me, I used to had my sugar babe 4 years ago and almost got broke so now I rather just to hire since it's way chipper.

[Kevin Slater]

Does your dentist REALLY like you?

 

It's the same question at the end of the day.

 

Drilling. Hehehe. Drilling. hehe.

 

Kevin Slater

[big-n-tall]

I tend to agree with @LaffingBear and @Funguy.

 

I'm sure there are escorts who act/fake encounters with people they are not into... just as there are escorts who find something attractive and fun with most or all of the people they encounter.

 

For the wonderful men I continuously rehire, they must enjoy the encounter on some level, I'm sure. A selection of those rehires sometimes will schedule their visit to my area around my schedule. That more than tells me they aren't acting when they arrange their travel schedules to match my hectic one. A very small selection of those wonderful men have retired and we still see each other (sexually and platonically, on and off the clock). They must be oscar caliber actors if they aren't being genuine and want to hang out and do stuff. LOL!!!

 

The ones who don't seem in to it on some level (which is rare), don't get my business a second time.

 

Enjoy the encounter regardless of if you think the guy would be too hot to be into you. People can (and do) get turned on by all sorts of types and the things those different types can do.

[Good Grief]

Sure are a lot of cynical people here . . .

I like to think each and every escort I am with has a good time with me and likes me as a person (or at least, doesn't dislike me because I am just a client.) They don't have to be my best bud but if they have to put on a smile and slip into a new "persona" with each and every client, I think they would not be very happy in their profession. I think I am pretty aware when that happens and I simply chalk it up to chemistry and don't try to delve into the whys and wherefores. It really is not too difficult to figure out and I just don't re-hire. Fortunately, that has not happened for years and, as a few of you can attest, I am a hiring slut!

There are also a few escorts who let me know months in advance of when they will be able to see me - I don't think they just do it to fill time, but to fill time with someone they like to see. I hope.

 

[LookingAround]

Sure are a lot of cynical people here . . .

I like to think each and every escort I am with has a good time with me and likes me as a person (or at least, doesn't dislike me because I am just a client.)

.

 

Of course. Just like your car salesperson really wants you to have the best deal, right?!

 

Of course you paying them would have nothing to do with it. I'm sure they love you just the same.

[Pepper Young]

I've had that same discussion in my head: Oh, he just pretends to like me because I'm paying him. It's silly and useless to think this way and is more a reflection on me than the escort. Like, I'm somehow unlikable. We're all human and have moments of doubt, cast motives on other people that aren't there, parse conversations looking for criticisms where there are none. It takes some time but I just move on to other, more pressing thoughts and problems and leave it behind.

[Cyd_StVincent]

If someone is hiring me to spend time with them I go into that encounter excited and friendly. If they are respectful and kind then I am thrilled to spend time with them and a real connection is formed. Sex work provides a container in which intimacy can be built quickly between two people who might never have another opportunity to get to know each other in the same way.

 

If a client is rude and has no interest in being considerate of my body, space, or time then yes I have to put on a more positive attitude than I would with someone who wasn't paying me, but that is the minority of the time. Unless you are a total jerk, I would take the sweetness that escorts share with you at face value.

[+ Lance_Navarro]

.

 

Of course. Just like your car salesperson really wants you to have the best deal, right?!

 

Of course you paying them would have nothing to do with it. I'm sure they love you just the same.

It seems that I, and the majority of guys with whom I share blissful moments have a very different outlook on life, pleasure, and erotic bliss. It's not a judgement, just observation.

[+ Lance_Navarro]

If someone is hiring me to spend time with them I go into that encounter excited and friendly. If they are respectful and kind then I am thrilled to spend time with them and a real connection is formed. Sex work provides a container in which intimacy can be built quickly between two people who might never have another opportunity to get to know each other in the same way.

 

If a client is rude and has no interest in being considerate of my body, space, or time then yes I have to put on a more positive attitude than I would with someone who wasn't paying me, but that is the minority of the time. Unless you are a total jerk, I would take the sweetness that escorts share with you at face value.

 

My feeling exactly! 99% of my experiences are absolutely blissful and authentic. There are however those 1% with whom I simply can't authentically connect, because their wall of insecurity is too high for me to scale. With them I just do my best to connect as deeply as I can, and share as much love and nurturing as they can handle. I embrace these rare moments as learning experiences.

[polichemos]

Right! I give them what they want and they give me what I want, simple, or are you going to tell me you want to make one of these guys your sugar babe because that's different but also needs to have way lot of money to afford one of these guys, believe me, I used to had my sugar babe 4 years ago and almost got broke so now I rather just to hire since it's way chipper.

I proposed it once to become a sugar daddy, 2 month dealIng with a sugar baby it's kind of hard specially if I don't satisfy the babe's needs, I think it's better to just hire and try a different selection of what NYC can offer.

[KennF]

Now... Hold on a moment...

 

First, why are "acting" and "authentic" mutually exclusive? They can be genuine, and authentic, and friendly, and intimate, and vulnerable, and get paid.. all at the same time. Let me ask you, do you think that football player don't enjoy the game? Don't you think they can be happy and authentic, while getting pummeled for pay?

 

If by "acting" you mean "pretending", then you're probably projecting your own issues onto an escort.

 

Escorts, like all professionals have parts of their job that a good, parts that are bad, parts that are routine, parts that exciting, and parts that difficult. Some enjoy meeting and getting to know new people. Some enjoy helping others to relax. Some are caregivers and find giving companionship is very fulfilling. Etc...

 

They are definitely satisfying themselves in their work, or, they don't continue in the profession.

[KennF]

Another way to think about it might be,

 

Do you like to hear people's stories? Would you like it less if you were paid to listen?

Do you like to have sex? Would you like it less if you were paid?

Do you like to get attention? Would you like it less if you were paid?

Do you like bringing pleasure to a man? Would you like it less if you were paid?

 

I presume the answer is probably no.

 

So then, you should ask yourself why do you picture spending time with you, and being paid, as something they don't enjoy?

[LivingnLA]

Intriguing answers. This is a fun thread!

 

I'm curious if any of y'all read my post and thought it was cynical? It may surprise some to hear but it wasn't cynical to me. It was based on my personal understanding of human interaction and the nature of authenticity.

 

https://philosophynow.org/issues/92/The_Limits_of_Authenticity

 

http://www.academia.edu/449955/The_Authenticity_of_Self_Conceptualization_Personal_Experience_and_Practice

 

These are two great reads about authenticity and why I talk about people wearing "masks" or "acting." We all vary our authentic presentations of self based on a myriad of factors. It seems to be incredibly difficult if not even impossible to be completely absolutely honest with ourselves about ourselves all the time, let alone to everyone else in our lives. We self-deceive and deceive others in varying degrees about all kinds of things for a whole host of reasons. Studying our reactions and behaviors and reflecting on them is part of a person's journey of self in my opinion and without such awareness, we cannot properly inspect and understand our "masks" and "roles."

[MartyB]

Hiring of an escort should be fun hot sexy and pleasure. I try to bring to it each time. I don't analyse it. I hope for chemistry and heat and when it happens it's the best. The truly great escorts that I have experienced would never date me but who cares? Enjoy yourself.

[MassageDrew]

Don't dwell on this thought more than you already have. Unless you're hoping to date him then I say just move on.

[+ nycman]

But although I'm sure you're not always acting, aren't you sometimes, just a little bit?

 

Aren't we all?

Sometimes?

Just a little bit?

 

Even with men with whom I have been deeply and truly in love....

Sometimes?

Just a little bit?

.....yes.

[AquaNYC]

Not being judgmental, but it's interesting that when someone expresses natural respect and interest in another person, our minds go to a place of second guessing it's authenticity. Must be a sign of our changing culture, as I thought that used to be the default. We all have a shared humanity, and I focus on being genuine and respectful in how I treat the other person. It usually works well, and I don't leave with doubts when I'm authentic with myself in such situations.

[+ poolboy48220]

Not to mention that any escort who says "I'm acting" will probably see a big drop in their business.

[LivingnLA]

Not to mention that any escort who says "I'm acting" will probably see a big drop in their business.

 

Right! Which basically exposes the inherent hypocrisy of those asking for "authenticity" and then punishing someone when they're being honest. Honesty is only one facet of "authenticity" but many conflate them. This and many other reasons are why it's important to understand that we're all acting to some degree every time we interact with another person. It's basically impossible to be completely honest and truthful all the time, especially since many people would find such behavior as rude, blunt, and off-putting. Recognizing our own "masks" and "roles" is a critical step in personal development and awareness. For me, it didn't make me cynical, it made me more aware and appreciative of myself and those in my life as I became aware of the layers we all wear. We're like onions, made-up of layers; peeling them takes work and sometimes you'll cry.

[big-n-tall]

Right! Which basically exposes the inherent hypocrisy of those asking for "authenticity" and then punishing someone when they're being honest. Honesty is only one facet of "authenticity" but many conflate them. This and many other reasons are why it's important to understand that we're all acting to some degree every time we interact with another person. It's basically impossible to be completely honest and truthful all the time, especially since many people would find such behavior as rude, blunt, and off-putting. Recognizing our own "masks" and "roles" is a critical step in personal development and awareness. For me, it didn't make me cynical, it made me more aware and appreciative of myself and those in my life as I became aware of the layers we all wear. We're like onions, made-up of layers; peeling them takes work and sometimes you'll cry.

 

I prefer parfaits, myself. LOL!

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7d6ZsRM36RU

[KennF]

it's interesting that when someone expresses natural respect and interest in another person, our minds go to a place of second guessing it's authenticity. Must be a sign of our changing culture, as I thought that used to be the default.

 

*chuckle* It isn't changing culture. It is each person's growing perception and experience.

 

When we're younger, we're more ready to believe that people are honest and straightforward. As we age and experience things, we learn that people are more complex. We think back and remember not feeling that people were disingenuous. But people were and we weren't aware of it.

 

Ask your parents and grandparents and so on. They all dealt with people who didn't trust the motives of their peers, but in their youth, they did.

[Mo Mason]

Any man I hire has his work cut out for him, I'll tell you that. He can't possibly like me any less than I like myself. So in my case... it's acting. 100%