Scared straight mom's style in the 2015 Baltimore riots.

[marylander1940]

 

I just searched Baltimore but the only thing I saw were the postings about Colby Keller, LOL

 

We need more mothers like this.

[+ sync]

Can't go along with this one. This is reinforcing the concept that violence is the better way to communicate. Not uncommon, very disappointing.

[bigvalboy]

Tough love....sometimes it's appropriate. Far too many kids in west Baltimore have parents who don't care, or who are not there, or can't be there, to do proper parenting. What's going on in West Baltimore is no longer about Freddie Gray, if it ever was.

 

[sincitymix]

Can't go along with this one. This is reinforcing the concept that violence is the better way to communicate. Not uncommon, very disappointing.

 

I think the mother did just fine. What do you think is going through her mind? My son is looting. my son is in a riot. my son could get arrested. my son could get SHOT.

how many times do you see on tv the parent saying.. my baby is an angel, he could never harm anyone? my baby is not in a gang. my baby etc etc.. only to find out the baby has a rap sheet a mile long.. baby is in a gang etc etc.

Parents should never turn a blind eye to a child (no matter the age of the child), stop using the tv to babysit and educate a child. get involved in your childs life, and yes.. some times you do need a swift smack on the ass. People are so afraid nowadays to discipline their children, no doubt because the child says..punish me again and im calling 911 and reporting you for abuse etc etc.

 

BTW.. if that was my mom. yes, she would be kicking and slapping my ass up and down the street. I would be lucky to have any ears or hair left.

[+ FreshFluff]

Tough love....sometimes it's appropriate. Far too many kids in west Baltimore have parents who don't care, or who are not there, or can't be there, to do proper parenting. What's going on in West Baltimore is no longer about Freddie Gray, if it ever was.

 

Exactly. The local ABC station said that she "recognized her masked son throwing rocks at police on television." So she got the message across in a way he would understand.

 

Freddie Gray's mother said said the same thing about the riots not being about him.

[thickornotatall]

that was the ass kicking seen around the world....a fair warning that the mother's love of her child trumps any allegation of abuse....he is very fortunate to have someone that cares enough to brave the tumult to drag his thug ass home....Brava!....

[+ purplekow]

I am of mixed emotions about this. One the one hand, the kind of slapping the mother did here smacks of mother slaps in which they do not really hurt, they more express the anger and desperation and exasperation the mother has for her child. I received a few of those in my life and they never hurt anything more than my pride and my heart, knowing I had gotten my mother that angry. The hands over the ears defense limits the possible damage even further and that was the move the young man made here and it was well executed. This particular section of the video does not show the defense.

 

On the other hand, the plaudits being sent this woman's way do seem to send the message that beating a child, no matter what the age of the child, is an acceptable recourse. So, as I stated initially mixed emotions.

[instudiocity]

Tough love....sometimes it's appropriate. Far too many kids in west Baltimore have parents who don't care, or who are not there, or can't be there, to do proper parenting. What's going on in West Baltimore is no longer about Freddie Gray, if it ever was.

 

Damn, there ain't no TRIPLE LIKE button.

[rvwnsd]

Way to go, mom.

[+ sync]

We need more mothers like this.

 

I think the mother did just fine.

 

So she got the message across in a way he would understand.

 

a fair warning that the mother's love of her child trumps any allegation of abuse.

 

Way to go, mom.

 

The responses here and elsewhere in social media supporting the mother's actions have made the memory of my mother more precious. My mother would have found me and ordered me home, and there would have been hell-to-pay with verbal tirades, sermons, loss of privileges, etc. But, my mother would never have disgraced herself, and me, in public with a violent attack. She was good for an occasional swat, but nothing of this degree. Thanks mom, I owe you, again.

[marylander1940]

Let's see why she says she did it?

 

"That's my only son, and at the end of the day I don't want him to be a Freddy Gray"

 

I've always believe people should think in their own interest and be the change they want, in this case she didn't want her son to die and try to save him. I'm sure she already had "the talk" with him and told him to be as nice as possible with police officer by age 11.

 

 

Hopefully she's talking the same way to her 6 children about using condoms to avoid unwanted pregnancies and getting infected with HIV and other diseases and she wishes someone had talked to her that way... 6 children... I don't know anybody who has that many kids.

 

Tough love in the inner city poor neighbors and our trailer parks sometimes is necessary.

 

http://wp.newrepublic.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/Screen-Shot-2015-01-26-at-7.36.03-PM.png

 

http://epicinspirationalquotes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/you-must-be-the-change-you-wish-to-see-in-the-world.jpg

[Kenny]

Tough love....sometimes it's appropriate. Far too many kids in west Baltimore have parents who don't care, or who are not there, or can't be there, to do proper parenting. What's going on in West Baltimore is no longer about Freddie Gray, if it ever was.

 

 

No, that is not what " tough love" is. (You should look it up; controversial in it's own right, tough love practitioners counsel against hitting.) what's in the video is violence, plain and simple. If you want to make a case that violence is essential, especially in chaotic situations such as this one, good luck. But sugar-coating it with a buzz word that includes "love" just doesn't wash.

[jimboivyo]

I support mom here. you gotta do what you gotta do.

 

the riots them selves? I'll just say that you don't see the gay community pulling shit like this to get equal rights

[+ carlos45]

I have mixed emotions about this incident, as well. There's no question the young man in the video deserved to be disciplined, but why does it have to be about violence??

[marylander1940]

I have mixed emotions about this incident, as well. There's no question the young man in the video deserved to be disciplined, but why does it have to be about violence??

 

She was trying to save her son... Maybe she couldn't convince him just by talking in front of his friends and she had to grab him.

[bigvalboy]

Thanks Marylander for starting this thread, it has allowed for a spirited discussion, with two opposing thoughts/philosophy on how this mother did or should have handled the situation. I find it fascinating how this mother now has become the 'bad guy' in all of this. In the end, I stand by my original post. There are many definitions of 'tough love' and perhaps those definitions have evolved over the original premise, but in my eyes, it is not all or nothing. I personally don't see what this mother did as being particularly violent. She slapped him with an open hand and tried to pull his hoodie off.

 

Her words, "That's my only son".... "At the end of the day, I just didn't want him to be another Freddie Gray".....

 

I'm trying to put myself in her position for a moment. Seeing her son in the middle of this rioting, hiding his identity, throwing rocks and being confrontational to law enforcement, who by the way showed great restraint, I'm sure her fear of having him be another victim like Freddie Gray, and having to bury him at such a young age, trumps everything. There are alot of parents who wouldn't have cared or even might have encouraged their child. I see her as doing the right thing, but that's just me...

[mmk123]

I am not a parent so I have no idea what kind of fear or love or denial or regret or pride a parent feels towards a child so I cannot say I am speaking form experience.

I will say however that even though this mother was slapping this child around and her behavior was abusive, I do not look at this as abuse. The child was 16 years old-he knows right from wrong. If he was protesting something then he should not have had a mask or hood on-he should have proudly showed his face. This mother was angry at what her son (and probably people in her community were doing) and she sought out her son to stop. This was not a person shaking a newborn for crying or slapping around a 4 year old because they spilled a glass of milk or a person beating their spouse or partner because the dinner was not on the table. That is abuse. This was a woman who was trying to stop her son from making a mistake. There should have been more parents out there getting their children out of those riots. I hope that what this woman did sends a message to other parents that it is time to start to seriously parent your children and not to let society do it.

[Kenny]

I support mom here. you gotta do what you gotta do.

 

the riots them selves? I'll just say that you don't see the gay community pulling shit like this to get equal rights

 

You don't see the gay community pulling "shit like this" to get equal rights? Actually, you do. It was called Stonewall, a riot against police harassment led by drag queens and other patrons of a gay bar. Gay people really ought to know their own history.

[mike carey]

You don't see the gay community pulling "shit like this" to get equal rights? Actually, you do. It was called Stonewall, a riot against police harassment led by drag queens and other patrons of a gay bar. Gay people really ought to know their own history.

 

Yes there were riots then, as there were when Harvey Milk was assassinated. At the time LGBT people saw the rest of society as posing an existential threat to them. We are harrassed and demeaned now but it does not seem to be an existential threat, much as some RWNJs might wish it were. Non-white people still see that they face an existential threat so they still react publicly to their perceived threat. Hence Baltimore. [Noting the people out lining up in front of the police lines to ward off the rioters.] They could and should be more restrained, and the rest of us shouldn't condone what happened but we should at least understand it.

[AdamSmith]

David Simon: 'There are now two Americas. My country is a horror show'

 

http://www.theguardian.com/world/2013/dec/08/david-simon-capitalism-marx-two-americas-wire

[anotherjohnindupont]

Yes there were riots then, as there were when Harvey Milk was assassinated. At the time LGBT people saw the rest of society as posing an existential threat to them. We are harrassed and demeaned now but it does not seem to be an existential threat, much as some RWNJs might wish it were. Non-white people still see that they face an existential threat so they still react publicly to their perceived threat. Hence Baltimore. [Noting the people out lining up in front of the police lines to ward off the rioters.] They could and should be more restrained, and the rest of us shouldn't condone what happened but we should at least understand it.

 

I remember Stonewall. The cops got their asses kicked by drag queens after they demanded a bribe. and that was well deserved

[wisconsinguy]

Can't go along with this one. This is reinforcing the concept that violence is the better way to communicate. Not uncommon, very disappointing.

 

I so go along your thoughts! Many decades ago I ran into an article that stated the only reason to support corporal punishment, (hitting, slapping) was to spare a child from harm. My first child, out of 5, had a affinity to run into the street for no particular reason. I gave him a couple "swats" on the behind, and then we both cried. I never did it again. There are so many situations in a home that occur at a given time, that we, on the outside, have no idea what causes behavior.

[shadowcatzxxx]

I support mom here. you gotta do what you gotta do.

 

the riots them selves? I'll just say that you don't see the gay community pulling shit like this to get equal rights

 

Ummmm ... Count de C ... I saw after posting that someone else had already mentioned this, but are you too young to remember Stonewall? For a variety of reasons, there are major differences (as well as similarities) between our struggle for civil rights and the struggles of people of color in urban ghettos. When the level of discrimination and untoward police activity reached a certain point, in one of those rare places and situations where the gay community existed in sufficient numbers and density to act as a group, our community DID erupt ... and demonstrated that some drag queens and transvestites (don't think there were any transgender folks involved back then) had more balls than most of the rest of us.

[rvwnsd]

The responses here and elsewhere in social media supporting the mother's actions have made the memory of my mother more precious. My mother would have found me and ordered me home, and there would have been hell-to-pay with verbal tirades, sermons, loss of privileges, etc. But, my mother would never have disgraced herself, and me, in public with a violent attack. She was good for an occasional swat, but nothing of this degree. Thanks mom, I owe you, again.

 

My mother did not discipline my brother and me in public. However, I would bet my condo that she would have done the same as this mother if one of us would have done something like this.