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Posted

Today was the first day I saw this, which I found to be rather alarming. How can one advertise as HIV +, undetectable and on ART, to then listing HIV - with a laundry list of exact dates of all kinds of shots received?

Am I behind the times and it's now possible to no longer be HIV + permanently? I find the man attractive, and his health status, while appreciating (initially) being forward with his status to be a nice piece of information to learn, he only goes one way position-wise, which is my reason for looking elsewhere more so than his changing HIV information.

I did not take a snapshot of the older ad, but I make a mental note of those who attract me physically who share their HIV + status, so while I'm not perfect, I'm sure that this was a status change on this guy and not imagination running wild. 

Posted

Even if they’ve always said they’re negative, I’d still take it with a grain of salt and look out for yourself.

I’ve seen people go from positive to undetectable, then no mention of anything, then back to undetectable, then on PrEP. It can be all over the place.

At the end of the day, I’m on PrEP, doxy PEP, and I use condoms sometimes. I just make sure I’m in charge of my own protection. And I’m the one who decides the level of risky I’m taking 🙂 

Posted

I've never met with anyone myself, but I have seen this in ads too, and it only reinforces the fact that nobody should take what's written in an ad as the gospel truth.  Even if it isn't meant to mislead, a person may not be fully aware of what their status is.  Only you can protect yourself, and this is never something you should blindly trust to anyone else.  

Posted

One New Orleans guy did not have status noted on the profile.  When I asked he said “I do everything to be sure I’m regularly tested and healthy”   I now know the coded response for undetectable   

After our first encounter, he told me he was HIV+ Undetectable.  I was not on PreP at the time and, as I researched it, I confirmed that the risk was tiny BUT that should have been MY decision, not his.   He subsequently proved to be dishonest and delusional in other ways too.

As a top, on prep with regular testing, undetectable should be exceptionally safe.  But, one guy in Biloxi advertised + undetectable and then removed it from his ad… it’s bad for business because it’s misunderstood….but disclosure is appropriate. 

Posted

you can never fully trust anything about someones status - that is why you must be responsible for your own health and be taking prep or using condoms. 

I have had scares when fucking women who assured me they were on the pill, and I trusted that.  With prep, I like that I do not have to worry about whether my partner is taking it or being honest about their status - all that matters is that I am taking my prep every day.  

 I can understand why some providers are not honest about their status due to miseducation and the massive fear campaign around HIV that we (rightly) grew up with.   Be responsible and use protection when you are with anyone - whether that be condoms or prep. 

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