Findom

[musclelicker]

Not sure if this topic belongs here or in another section, but I recently learned about Findom.  Have any of you heard about it?  What all can you tell me about Findom?

[+ FrankR]

2 minutes ago, musclelicker said:

Not sure if this topic belongs here or in another section, but I recently learned about Findom.  Have any of you heard about it?  What all can you tell me about Findom?

I suppose it can be considered a fetish. Financial domination (aka handing your wallet to a man who goes on a spending spree) sounds like a good way to put a dent in your net worth without much reward. I dont recommend it, but you do you…if it is your thing. Just be very sure to understand and agree with your dom what you will get out of it and set firm limits on spending. 

[Venite]

Honestly, one ought to have a natural urge for it, if you want to engage in the practice (as a fin-sub).
 

If you’re looking to develop some taste for having your pockets drained, being financially pilfered (and possibly stolen from)- it’s not for you. It should already be an innate desire.

I really don’t recommend it

[+ ApexNomad]

36 minutes ago, musclelicker said:

Not sure if this topic belongs here or in another section, but I recently learned about Findom.  Have any of you heard about it?  What all can you tell me about Findom?

Findom, or financial domination, is a type of consensual power exchange dynamic where one person, often called the “financial sub,” willingly gives money or gifts to a “dom” as a way of expressing submission or loyalty. It’s usually part of BDSM culture and emphasizes consent and boundaries. There can be a non-sexual or sexual component added to the dynamic, but that’s entirely up to you and the participant to decide based on your preferences and boundaries. Clear communication and mutual agreement are key to ensuring a healthy and consensual experience.

[+ poolboy48220]

there was a discussion about findom in this thread about a year ago.  https://www.companyofmen.org/topic/148608-descriptions-in-an-ad-other-than-age-size-fibbing-most-off-putting/

Edited December 28, 2024 by poolboy48220

[TorontoDrew]

I was chatting with a provider recently and he asked if I was into findom.  I nearly laughed.  Lost interest in the provider as well.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

3 hours ago, ApexNomad said:

Findom, or financial domination, is a type of consensual power exchange dynamic where one person, often called the “financial sub,” willingly gives money or gifts to a “dom” as a way of expressing submission or loyalty. It’s usually part of BDSM culture and emphasizes consent and boundaries. There can be a non-sexual or sexual component added to the dynamic, but that’s entirely up to you and the participant to decide based on your preferences and boundaries. Clear communication and mutual agreement are key to ensuring a healthy and consensual experience.

This is the correct reply.

[SirBillybob]

I already get Discovery included in a jawsome package deal. It even sometimes includes sperm whales.

Edited December 28, 2024 by SirBillybob

[+ keroscenefire]

What ApexNomad said is completely valid. Some people are into this form of BDSM. However if an escort asks me if I am into FinDom, I consider that a huge red flag. To me that means the escort is trying to make a lot of money without doing much work.

That said, if this is something you're into and there are escorts that list FinDom as a fetish. Certainly you can definitely contact them and arrange something. But usually it's a bad sign when the escort is asking that of a client. The one time I kind of got into a situation like that I really didn't enjoy it. He literally wanted access to my Venmo so I could send him like money for every 15 minutes with him. 

Some guys might have that money to burn, but I'm not one of them at all and I think if you don't know about FinDom, you're probably not into it. 

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

2 hours ago, keroscenefire said:

What ApexNomad said is completely valid. Some people are into this form of BDSM. However if an escort asks me if I am into FinDom, I consider that a huge red flag. To me that means the escort is trying to make a lot of money without doing much work.

Findom, if you're doing it correctly and it's profitable, is a LOT of work.  Don't fool yourself into thinking it's just magic money that grows on trees.

You have to be super present, super responsible and incredibly creative.

[+ keroscenefire]

3 minutes ago, BenjaminNicholas said:

Findom, if you're doing it correctly and it's profitable, is a LOT of work.  Don't fool yourself into thinking it's just magic money that grows on trees.

You have to be super present, super responsible and incredibly creative.

I don't doubt there's some guys that do it well and do it responsibly. But I think the majority of guys who are messaging clients asking if they are into FinDom are not that.  My one experience with it was very bad.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

Just now, keroscenefire said:

I don't doubt there's some guys that do it well and do it responsibly. But I think the majority of guys who are messaging clients asking if they are into FinDom are not that.  My one experience with it was very bad.

I can understand that.  And i'm sorry for it.

[Oakman]

41 minutes ago, BenjaminNicholas said:

Findom, if you're doing it correctly and it's profitable, is a LOT of work.  Don't fool yourself into thinking it's just magic money that grows on trees.

You have to be super present, super responsible and incredibly creative.

Is this something you have personal experience with? I don’t generally believe in being judgmental about the sort of things that get other guys off, so I am pretty open minded about this kind of relationship (or hire). Lots of people spend their money in ways that some others may find perplexing. In fact, I think most people find the idea of hiring for sexual experiences in general to be objectionable, so I don’t really see the need for being judgmental toward findom/cashpigs in this forum. I am really curious about what is satisfying for the cashpig, and what the hustle actually entails for the provider.

[+ ApexNomad]

1 hour ago, keroscenefire said:

I don't doubt there's some guys that do it well and do it responsibly. But I think the majority of guys who are messaging clients asking if they are into FinDom are not that.  My one experience with it was very bad.

I completely agree. FinDom is such a niche kink that bringing it up unsolicited to a client feels out of place to me. If it’s something a provider offers, listing it in an ad or profile should be more than enough—which I have seen many times. That way, it gives clients the option to engage if they’re interested without it feeling forced or awkward.

[StableMentalDefective]

The thought of handing over my card so that a provider who cannot correctly use reflexive pronouns can buy a Ferragamo belt doesn't work for myself...

 

[SirBillybob]

3 hours ago, StableMentalDefective said:

The thought of handing over my card so that a provider who cannot correctly use reflexive pronouns can buy a Ferragamo belt doesn't work for myself...

 

Also we’d be strapped themselves. 

[Walt]

I wish all the providers I liked were financial subs.

If they were I'd be seeing a lot more providers.

[Simon Suraci]

5 hours ago, ApexNomad said:

listing it in an ad or profile should be more than enough

Not really. a provider listing FinDom is advertising to the 99% of their base that he offers something the 99% are turned off by or afraid of. A lot of clients fail to see it for what it is: an offer to provide one of many sexual services. Rather, they see it as a requirement, a preference, or an exclusive offering (not true most of the time).

At best, the 99% do not take the provider seriously. At middle, they are turned off. At worst, they are scared, like it’s a threat to steal all their money at gunpoint. That’s not what FinDom is, or how it works. It takes effort, commitment, and creativity to do it well. FinDom subs want providers who can do it well.

The uber small minority of clients actually interested in FinDom would just as easily find providers on niche sites, or ask providers if they offer it. Sure, it would be nice to read it as a preselected option on a profile, as something a provider has experience with and offers as a service, as mundane as fisting or roleplay. But the typical client does not see it that way. Fight or flight takes hold, judgement washes over their brains, and they absolutely lose their minds.

So yeah, I view listing FinDom on a profile as a liability rather than an asset. Unless the profile is on a niche site catering to a specific client audience. Most clients are not mature enough to see it for what it is - simply a menu option, one they are neither encouraged nor compelled to choose.

Re: providers suggesting FinDom services out of the blue to a new client. This is weird. I see no reason to bring it up unless the client asked or indicated in some way that he is interested in FinDom services. This is a red flag. I would be concerned about the provider suggesting or pushing FinDom, but not at all concerned with the provider listing it a menu option.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

5 hours ago, StableMentalDefective said:

The thought of handing over my card so that a provider who cannot correctly use reflexive pronouns can buy a Ferragamo belt doesn't work for myself...

 

If this is what he's spending money on, you have the wrong guy.

A belt?  That's amatuer hour.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

7 hours ago, Oakman said:

Is this something you have personal experience with?

Yep.  It is.  

And yes, I take it with a great deal of responsibility for those I see who are into it.

That said, I wouldn't consider it my primary wheelhouse.

 

[BuffaloKyle]

I'm all for findom if I'm the one getting the money! 😆

Otherwise I hire providers to find dem in my bed. 😉

[LD19847]

14 hours ago, keroscenefire said:

However if an escort asks me if I am into FinDom, I consider that a huge red flag. To me that means the escort is trying to make a lot of money without doing much work.

Agreed.  Most providers I see advertising findom are straight bodybuilders.  From the outside, it just seems like pure exploitation.

[SirBillybob]

7 hours ago, Simon Suraci said:

Not really. a provider listing FinDom is advertising to the 99% of their base that he offers something the 99% are turned off by or afraid of. A lot of clients fail to see it for what it is: an offer to provide one of many sexual services. Rather, they see it as a requirement, a preference, or an exclusive offering (not true most of the time).

At best, the 99% do not take the provider seriously. At middle, they are turned off. At worst, they are scared, like it’s a threat to steal all their money at gunpoint. That’s not what FinDom is, or how it works. It takes effort, commitment, and creativity to do it well. FinDom subs want providers who can do it well.

The uber small minority of clients actually interested in FinDom would just as easily find providers on niche sites, or ask providers if they offer it. Sure, it would be nice to read it as a preselected option on a profile, as something a provider has experience with and offers as a service, as mundane as fisting or roleplay. But the typical client does not see it that way. Fight or flight takes hold, judgement washes over their brains, and they absolutely lose their minds.

So yeah, I view listing FinDom on a profile as a liability rather than an asset. Unless the profile is on a niche site catering to a specific client audience. Most clients are not mature enough to see it for what it is - simply a menu option, one they are neither encouraged nor compelled to choose.

Re: providers suggesting FinDom services out of the blue to a new client. This is weird. I see no reason to bring it up unless the client asked or indicated in some way that he is interested in FinDom services. This is a red flag. I would be concerned about the provider suggesting or pushing FinDom, but not at all concerned with the provider listing it a menu option.

They may do well to be less on the nose and to list for example methods of payment as Cash, Visa, Mastercard, AMEX, Venmo, PayPal, and PayPig. 

[SirBillybob]

7 hours ago, BenjaminNicholas said:

If this is what he's spending money on, you have the wrong guy.

A belt?  That's amatuer hour.

But new backup maintenance fan belts for the Porsche and Maserati collection, now we’re talking. 

[+ ApexNomad]

8 hours ago, Simon Suraci said:

Not really. a provider listing FinDom is advertising to the 99% of their base that he offers something the 99% are turned off by or afraid of. A lot of clients fail to see it for what it is: an offer to provide one of many sexual services. Rather, they see it as a requirement, a preference, or an exclusive offering (not true most of the time).

At best, the 99% do not take the provider seriously. At middle, they are turned off. At worst, they are scared, like it’s a threat to steal all their money at gunpoint. That’s not what FinDom is, or how it works. It takes effort, commitment, and creativity to do it well. FinDom subs want providers who can do it well.

The uber small minority of clients actually interested in FinDom would just as easily find providers on niche sites, or ask providers if they offer it. Sure, it would be nice to read it as a preselected option on a profile, as something a provider has experience with and offers as a service, as mundane as fisting or roleplay. But the typical client does not see it that way. Fight or flight takes hold, judgement washes over their brains, and they absolutely lose their minds.

So yeah, I view listing FinDom on a profile as a liability rather than an asset. Unless the profile is on a niche site catering to a specific client audience. Most clients are not mature enough to see it for what it is - simply a menu option, one they are neither encouraged nor compelled to choose.

Re: providers suggesting FinDom services out of the blue to a new client. This is weird. I see no reason to bring it up unless the client asked or indicated in some way that he is interested in FinDom services. This is a red flag. I would be concerned about the provider suggesting or pushing FinDom, but not at all concerned with the provider listing it a menu option.

It’s a power dynamic that’s best initiated by the client. Simply listing it as a menu option is more than enough for a client to take note. It’s not typically something that’s widely advertised, to be honest. Clients who are truly into FinDom aren’t focused on small transactions like belts—that’s chump change.

FinDom often isn’t something that happens right out of the gate with a provider. There’s usually a test period to determine if there’s a good match, similar to meeting with a provider for a few sessions before deciding on something more extensive, like an overnight.

I’ve noticed a trend of providers in their early 20s listing FinDom in their ad copy, which often comes across as incoherent and paired with sloppy photos. Perhaps unfairly, I tend to dismiss it entirely as a joke.