Typically-Safe Pro Tops: if Client invites you to go bare...

[SometimesBi]

Preface to this question: Yes, we all understand that even with all sorts of vaccines and PrEP-arations, bareback does have risks. Thus I'm asking that this thread NOT become JUST a safety discussion. Treat this question as theoretical if that helps. 😏

Ok, here's the question/scenario. Primarily this is aimed at professional Tops who most frequently use protection (but not 100%). Though, others I'm sure will chime in.

A bottom client hires you, and expects you to top him. However, when you arrive, you see this guy is [ugly/fat/glasses/very_old/etc... whatever fits for you]. For this case, let's say that he is at least clean (not stinky).

You realize that it's going to be tough to get hard, stay aroused, perform because of his appearance. 

But then, this guy invites you to go bare. 

Would such an offer help? Would you find it easier to perform with the guy? Or, is there no overcoming unattractiveness? 

[sincitymix]

12 hours ago, SometimesBi said:

Preface to this question: Yes, we all understand that even with all sorts of vaccines and PrEP-arations, bareback does have risks. Thus I'm asking that this thread NOT become JUST a safety discussion. Treat this question as theoretical if that helps. 😏

Ok, here's the question/scenario. Primarily this is aimed at professional Tops who most frequently use protection (but not 100%). Though, others I'm sure will chime in.

A bottom client hires you, and expects you to top him. However, when you arrive, you see this guy is [ugly/fat/glasses/very_old/etc... whatever fits for you]. For this case, let's say that he is at least clean (not stinky).

You realize that it's going to be tough to get hard, stay aroused, perform because of his appearance. 

But then, this guy invites you to go bare. 

Would such an offer help? Would you find it easier to perform with the guy? Or, is there no overcoming unattractiveness? 

A master class escort would not care what a client looks like. They would treat the client as if he was the entire universe, at least that should be the impression the client gets. The escort would never reveal the internal feelings. 

[Simon Suraci]

Agree with @sincitymix and I know many other forum members feel similarly.

Wrapped or not, you do what you gotta do for any client that hires you.

Still, going bare helps a lot, at least for me. As a top, which is the case the majority of the time, I prefer it. And that’s not a function of client attractiveness. It helps with any client, no matter what they look like. The mechanics are just easier, especially when you’re initially entering your bottom client.

Aside - rimming helps a lot to prepare your bottom client to take it well (read my rimming guide 😍)

Going bare makes a big difference for me being able to perform at my best. Even if the client is hot, it still helps. The majority of clients are conventionally unattractive, and that’s just how this business works. That’s not important though. The person and the connection matter the most. Anything to make the mechanics easier make it easier, in turn, to focus on connecting with the client. 

 

[+ Jamie21]

Most clients who want to bottom seem to prefer or expect me to go bare. It’s the default now and isn’t even discussed. Similarly if they want to top me they go bare. 

I prefer it, because the feel of a condom isn’t great and the mechanics of putting it on detract from the moment (especially tearing the damn packet open when your hands are oily or covered in lube is annoyingly difficult). 

The consideration isn’t anything to do with the looks of the client: as others have said you can’t do the job properly if you’re bothered about whether someone might be physically unattractive. Usually if there’s challenges in getting or staying hard it’s because there’s other distractions in the room or the client doesn’t seem to be enjoying it.
 

 

[liubit]

3 hours ago, Simon Suraci said:

Aside - rimming helps a lot to prepare your bottom client to take it well (read my rimming guide 😍)

@Simon Suraci’ s rimming guide is a definite must-read. Beautifully written, it provides excellent tips and advice. Search the forum for it and don’t t miss it, guys!

[+ Just966]

Can you give a link to the guide. Tried search function and did not come up. Thanks!

[muscmtl]

On 8/18/2023 at 12:02 AM, sincitymix said:

A master class escort would not care what a client looks like

Names and adresses please, should be quick, I don't expect more than five or six on Rentmen

[muscmtl]

Geez, still this issue, 25 yrs later (YES prep and undetectable date back to the late 90's, not 2005). HIV is done deal, move on.

If u wanna be scared to bare then be scared of gonorrhea syphilis clamydia. So if STDs is your fear then a) don't escort or b) don't rim, don't suck, don't kiss, don't fuck (like 50% of rentmeners)

Diseases: get them, get treated, get over them

[KeepItReal]

2 minutes ago, muscmtl said:

Geez, still this issue, 25 yrs later (YES prep and undetectable date back to the late 90's, not 2005). HIV is done deal, move on.

If u wanna be scared to bare then be scared of gonorrhea syphilis clamydia. So if STDs is your fear then a) don't escort or b) don't rim, don't suck, don't kiss, don't fuck (like 50% of rentmeners)

Diseases: get them, get treated, get over them

Your dates are way off. PreP was approved in 2012.  Geez, when will barebackers stop sneering at those of us who wear condoms because we care about our health and the health of our partners?? 

[muscmtl]

On 8/19/2023 at 3:58 AM, Simon Suraci said:

 @sincitymix aside - rimming helps a lot to prepare your bottom client to take it well (read my rimming guid 

And getting rimmed by your bottom escort is a must to get hard for top clients😏

[ICTJOCK]

I concur with much of the discussion.   The client can't control the perceptions of his looks,  but he can his cleanliness.     If he is presentable,  I think professionalism should rule and do what has been requested.     

[muscmtl]

On 8/20/2023 at 8:32 AM, KeepItReal said:

Your dates are way off. PreP was approved in 2012.  Geez, when will barebackers stop sneering at those of us who wear condoms because we care about our health and the health of our partners?? 

Nooooo your dates are way off. You think prep and undetectable just happened in 2012. It is those of us, the barebackers of the 80s and 90s, who discovered it. It took a decade for medicine to catch on

[KeepItReal]

1 hour ago, muscmtl said:

Nooooo your dates are way off. You think prep and undetectable just happened in 2012. It is those of us, the barebackers of the 80s and 90s, who discovered it. It took a decade for medicine to catch on

From the CDC's website confirming Prep was first approved in 2012. 

https://www.cdc.gov/nchhstp/newsroom/fact-sheets/hiv/PrEP-for-hiv-prevention-in-the-US-factsheet.html

Here is a link to the first study published discussing the potential that viral loads could be undetectable and not be transmitted to partners. Published 2011. 

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/HPTN_052

 

[marylander1940]

On 8/17/2023 at 8:21 AM, SometimesBi said:

Preface to this question: Yes, we all understand that even with all sorts of vaccines and PrEP-arations, bareback does have risks. Thus I'm asking that this thread NOT become JUST a safety discussion. Treat this question as theoretical if that helps. 😏

Ok, here's the question/scenario. Primarily this is aimed at professional Tops who most frequently use protection (but not 100%). Though, others I'm sure will chime in.

A bottom client hires you, and expects you to top him. However, when you arrive, you see this guy is [ugly/fat/glasses/very_old/etc... whatever fits for you]. For this case, let's say that he is at least clean (not stinky).

You realize that it's going to be tough to get hard, stay aroused, perform because of his appearance. 

But then, this guy invites you to go bare. 

Would such an offer help? Would you find it easier to perform with the guy? Or, is there no overcoming unattractiveness? 

Great point!

Without a doubt it's easier to keep it hard without a condom especially if the client is out of shape!

I also know many escorts who make up their mind about BB or not when they see the client. One of them told me "I simply want to make sure it's not a crack house to minimize risks".

[marylander1940]

On 8/20/2023 at 5:51 AM, ICTJOCK said:

I concur with much of the discussion.   The client can't control the perceptions of his looks,  but he can his cleanliness.     If he is presentable,  I think professionalism should rule and do what has been requested.     

Without a doubt. Unfortunately they're the last ones to know they stink...

 

 

Edited August 21, 2023 by marylander1940

[+ SirBillybob]

3 hours ago, marylander1940 said:

Without a doubt. Unfortunately they're the last ones to know they stink...

 

 

Just follow Mary Katherine’s lead.

[+ SirBillybob]

On 8/19/2023 at 4:31 AM, Jamie21 said:

I prefer it, because the feel of a condom isn’t great and the mechanics of putting it on detract from the moment (especially tearing the damn packet open when your hands are oily or covered in lube is annoyingly difficult). 
 

Why I rip open the ketchup packet(s) ahead of time, prior to wrapping my hands around a greasy whopper. 

Edited August 21, 2023 by SirBillybob

[Guest]

On 8/17/2023 at 8:21 AM, SometimesBi said:

A bottom client hires you, and expects you to top him. However, when you arrive, you see this guy is [ugly/fat/glasses/very_old/etc... whatever fits for you]. For this case, let's say that he is at least clean (not stinky).

You realize that it's going to be tough to get hard, stay aroused, perform because of his appearance. 

But then, this guy invites you to go bare. 

Would such an offer help? Would you find it easier to perform with the guy? Or, is there no overcoming unattractiveness? 

 

On 8/17/2023 at 9:02 PM, sincitymix said:

A master class escort would not care what a client looks like. They would treat the client as if he was the entire universe, at least that should be the impression the client gets.

The idea that there are providers out there that the ability to "erect" is predicated on what a client looks like is so wildly bizarre to me. We are supposed to be able to perform and it's EXPECTED and rightfully so if this is one's chosen profession. I've seen A LOT of people and there's never been a time where I didn't produce a boner, in fact I can't think of too many times where I didn't at least cum once or twice. 😂 For me personally there's no overcoming the bare. Condoms don't kill my boners in the slightest... Of course prep is great for the prevention of HIV but I still fear loads of other bugs and pathogens 🦠 and possibly passing them on. I'm not engaging in a debate involving condoms vs going raw dog ( bare back ) but once again I see all types, ages, sizes, colors with equal enthusiasm 😄

Edited August 22, 2023 by V_Marco

[mike carey]

7 hours ago, SirBillybob said:

Why I rip open the ketchup packet(s) ahead of time, prior to wrapping my hands around a greasy whopper. 

Do you think you might be doing it wrong if you're using ketchup packets?

[+ SirBillybob]

For best behinds best be Heinz. Just ask a young Joey Tribbiani fresh off his Spartacus cover.

[NyGold]

I’m glad this is being discussed. I’ve seen in prior threads a naïveté either real or feigned that suggests many still assume condoms to be the norm in the world that providers at least play in. This ignores a massive shift in behavior over the past decade (and I’m not making any judgement on that here).
 

I have experienced at least two providers trying to “stealth” (saying they would use protection but then secretly removing it) and more than one refusing the appointment before even meeting if safe was a requirement (so not based on however grotesque they may find me 😊). And I’ve heard of many similar experiences.

Doesn’t make sense to me - if a provider finds a client so unattractive that he is unable to perform, why would going bare mean he could forget all that he found unattractive? 

While I am on prep I’ll add that many who see providers probably aren’t - for whatever reason - so they have risks that “mainstream” provider culture may not understand or empathize with. And as discussed on here a few times, there are several known instances of providers lying about their health status in their ads - while it’s the clients ultimate responsibility to behave as he feels safest doing, there’s also a false security that can come from a (naive and foolish) belief that risks are as low as the best case scenarios may predict.