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What does HE (happy ending) really entail when hiring a Masseur?


newdad

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If I want a massage and more than a handjob, I don't look on the massage ad sites, I look on rent.men and check "Erotic Massage" under the Services tab and then click "Oral" under the Preferences tab. 

Another clue is when I see someone advertise on both an escort site and a massage site.  Sometimes they even use the same screen name and photos between both sites.

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Personally, I don't really know if I WANT to have a sexual encounter with someone until I've met them first.

So I ALWAYS book a massage, ( preferably a mix of therapeutic and erotic ) Let the provider do his thing as he would normally do, and if I like the fellow, I leave a nice tip and inquire about other services and "shared interests" available for another session. 

I find this a comfortable formula for both client and provider.

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15 hours ago, pubic_assistance said:

Theres an exception to every rule. 

As this discussion (and many, many similar discussions in the past) demonstrate, there simply is no rule when it comes to sensual/erotic massages.  As someone uncomfortable in situations where expectations are not clear,  it took me a while to accommodate to the ambiguities.  But I now relish not knowing in advance exactly how things are going to develop.

I never bring up explicit sexual expectations in a first conversation, although I do ask whether the masseur works in the nude.   Over the years I have experienced pretty much everything at one time or another during a massage, only once with an upcharge.  In that case, the masseur took advantage of my aroused condition to offer something for an additional fee; I agreed and regretted it afterwards...it was a distinctly lackluster experience.  

Bottom line: no matter how much advice you get here, you will not know exactly what's going to happen in advance.  Just jump in with some recommended guys.  After your first few experiences, you'll get the hang of it.  Good luck and have fun!

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5 hours ago, newatthis said:

As this discussion (and many, many similar discussions in the past) demonstrate, there simply is no rule when it comes to sensual/erotic massages.  As someone uncomfortable in situations where expectations are not clear,  it took me a while to accommodate to the ambiguities.  But I now relish not knowing in advance exactly how things are going to develop.

I never bring up explicit sexual expectations in a first conversation, although I do ask whether the masseur works in the nude.   Over the years I have experienced pretty much everything at one time or another during a massage, only once with an upcharge.  In that case, the masseur took advantage of my aroused condition to offer something for an additional fee; I agreed and regretted it afterwards...it was a distinctly lackluster experience.  

Bottom line: no matter how much advice you get here, you will not know exactly what's going to happen in advance.  Just jump in with some recommended guys.  After your first few experiences, you'll get the hang of it.  Good luck and have fun!

I agree. My best experiences have been with legit massage therapists that did not advertise or discuss anything beyond purely therapeutic work that simply escalated and the masseur took control. Sometimes they ask if they can, but the ones that just go for it on a whim are usually the best experiences. 

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I’m so glad I work in a country where it’s legal to do sex work. It’s simply so much easier for me to discuss with clients what they want, and for them to ask.

There’s none of this trying to decipher whether I’ll go further than a hand job from clues in my advert or asking coy questions and trying to guess! My clients can ask for exactly what they want, without worry that there’s any legal lines crossed or that I’ll get offended. 

Also, I really don’t think up-selling during the massage is a good idea because it interrupts the flow and is awkward. So I prefer to agree what’s included beforehand, and basically anything can be included.

I don’t think there should be a hard line between massage work and escorting because it’s just different degrees of basically the same thing. The price will usually be the best indicator of where the service will be on the continuum from therapeutic only massage all the way through to escorting with full bareback sex. In my massage work I’ve worked along that whole range. 

 

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I’m my experience, so much of what “happens” is a matter of the chemistry between masseur and client which can change from day to day and client to client.  I always ask what is included in the rate and don’t expect any thing else. I especially think that it’s important to respect the masseur’s dignity and boundaries.  For the client they are the only masseur they are seeing that day.  For the masseur they may have several of clients, which is hard work and they may not be able to give the same energy to all clients. All of the really good masseurs I have been too want to be respected for being a good masseur not something else.  I know this because i have talked to many (not all) about how they feel and what they hope to get out of the session. It’s instructive to hear their side of this discussion.  Thankful for masseurs on this site who do just that. 

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33 minutes ago, newatthis said:

But do they always ask, especially the newbies?  Or are there some who tiptoe around what they really want, perhaps out of shyness?

Yes they do tiptoe. It’s often due to shyness I think, but also I think it’s because they’re trying to be respectful, which I appreciate and is a nice disposition to have. However I’d say that there’s no need to be worried about causing offence by asking for something. You generally won’t cause offence to someone offering sensual or erotic massage because they’ll appreciate the clarity in most instances. 

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I ordinarily select certified masseurs on RentMasseur who have provocative photos and advertise Therapeutic, Sensual and Erotic massages, and have a posted rate from around $160 to $200. That has 90% of the time resulted in a good to great massage and lots of mutual play, a hand job, and orgasm. Many will let me suck them. Mutual sucking has only come with repeated visits, and sometimes not at all. I have one boy who cums but only for the last customer of the day. I have sometimes been fucked by the masseur. One was a masseur who advertises on both RentMasseur and Rent.Men. I paid the RentMasseur rate. Another who advertised only on RentMasseur asked for a tip as I was paying...I was going to tip anyway for the fucking. He subsequently advertises both on RentMasseur and Rent.Men. 

BTW, if the RentMasseur ad quotes the rate is "Ask" I figure that is for a la carte escort services.

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On 1/31/2023 at 6:26 PM, Trick said:

Do you think a client will refuse a blowjob?

Yes, there are guys who are skiddish about getting their dick sucked by just anybody.  They've come for a theraputic massage and nothing more.  I've heard guys who are in a relationship say that they consider that as cheating on their partner.  Now they may be in the minority but it does happen.

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On 2/2/2023 at 11:06 AM, Jamie21 said:

Yes they do tiptoe. It’s often due to shyness I think, but also I think it’s because they’re trying to be respectful, which I appreciate and is a nice disposition to have. However I’d say that there’s no need to be worried about causing offence by asking for something. You generally won’t cause offence to someone offering sensual or erotic massage because they’ll appreciate the clarity in most instances. 

That's because you are our special masseur Jamie21 and no one compares to you. 

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6 hours ago, Redwine56 said:

Yes, there are guys who are skiddish about getting their dick sucked by just anybody.  They've come for a theraputic massage and nothing more.  I've heard guys who are in a relationship say that they consider that as cheating on their partner.  Now they may be in the minority but it does happen.

I’ve a client who I’ve seen a few times who asks me to keep my shorts on during the massage, and he asks that his groin / bum stay draped.

I was surprised at the request first time I saw him. I said “you know this is sensual massage? It can include genitals, and climax if you want?”. I thought perhaps he’d misunderstood the nature of my massage (despite having seen my website which I think is quite clear about what can happen 😂). 

But he said “no I totally understand Jamie, and I’d love to have all of that but my religion says I must not. I just want a great massage. You can touch me there through the towel and if you’re ok I might feel you through your shorts but please don’t take them off or remove the towel”. I had to check with him if he was 100% sure because sometimes clients start with one intention and then during the massage they ask me to go further. 

But no, he was adamant that nothing beyond touching through fabric would happen. And so it turned out. I kind of found it a little challenging to end the massage…there being no natural climax and slow down so to speak but otherwise it was incredibly erotic. I could see he was hard, and so was I, but nothing happened. Afterwards he was so grateful for the session. 

Even more extraordinary was that he subsequently booked a 4 hands session with me and another masseur (a friend of mine who I absolutely adore and who I’ve filmed with). I had to tell my friend about the rules for the session; massage, touching, shorts stay on, no climax.

On the day of the 4 hands the client again briefed us on what he wanted (and didn’t want!) and I could see the surprise on my friend’s face. I asked the client if he was ok if we, the masseurs, got naked and interacted during the session. Often a 4 hands develops into a sex session and I was kind of hoping he’d say he was happy to watch me and my friend play.

But the client said that the religious rules meant he could not see another guys cock so we could kiss etc but must not remove our shorts. He was very insistent on this so I had to put some underwear on beneath my shorts because otherwise my cock would have poked out the leg hole (these were short shorts 😉).

At this point the client went to shower before we started and my friend said to me “is this for real or is it a role play scenario and he’ll want to get DP’d after 15 minutes?”. I should add at this point the client has a wonderful bubble bum, which my friend had clearly noticed as the client walked in his underwear to the shower. 

“Wishful thinking” I replied “he’s definite about staying covered and no climax or anything, for him or for us”. Make it as sexy as possible but there’s a red line we must not cross”. 

So we proceeded to give our client the most erotic and intimate 4 hands no climax massage I’ve ever been part of. The sexual tension that could not be released made it all the more heightened. It’s fantastic to explore parts of the body in an erotic way without ever going to the genitals directly. I had to admire the client’s discipline, and appreciate the different perspective on erotic massage it gave me, even though I can’t understand the religious beliefs that he held. 

I should add that he paid us the normal rate for a sensual 4 hands session, and he was absolutely satisfied and happy with the massage because we’d respected his restrictions. It made me appreciate how having boundaries can enable what happens within them to be explored to its maximum potential. 

Sorry for the long response but I think it worth sharing because it was one of the most interesting massages I’ve ever done. 


 


 

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18 hours ago, Redwine56 said:

Yes, there are guys who are skiddish about getting their dick sucked by just anybody.  They've come for a theraputic massage and nothing more.  I've heard guys who are in a relationship say that they consider that as cheating on their partner.  Now they may be in the minority but it does happen.

Agree with you here. Early in my agreement with my other half there was to be no oral simply to reduce the worry about STIs etc and because that was ‘cheating’. We’ve moved past this but it may be a consideration for many clients - not wanting to have to explain things to anyone. Thus, the HE is hands only until a subsequent visit or more open communication. 

Further, the above advice from @Whippoorwill is very good for the OP! Learn your rules and how to navigate choices amongst providers, as well as how to appropriately and effectively communicate your interests/expectations in line with what they can or will deliver — and all for what cost! 😉 

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In both cases I mentioned, I had booked a massage through RentMasseur with a masseur who advertised "Therapeutic, Sensual, Erotic" with no discussion of what it actually entailed or extras. In one the case, the masseur started to ask for a tip as I was counting out his money, and said "Oh OK" when he saw I added a 20% tip, and he was happy. So yes he expected a tip. I was a little irritated only because he wasn't that considerate a top. With the Hawaii boy, I think it just evolved out of what we were both into, fucking was the natural next step, and neither of us expected there would be a tip. We were both happy enough with the sex. 

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