Grindr Safety Protocol

[jtwalker]

On 9/26/2022 at 6:27 PM, pubic_assistance said:

Ah...ok. Got it.

You should have said so !

You just have a bit of a learning curve ahead of you.  I just went through this recently, mentoring one of my old wrestling buddies from high school who left his wife of 25 years and finally admitted to himself he was gay.  He didn't know where to start, to meet cute young guys, because he's now a 50 year old beefy man.

So....I can say that if you're an older man who likes younger men, you aren't necessarily out of luck. There's someone for everyone, as they say.

We all know that most men are very visual, and so the Instagram hotties look for other Instagram hotties. But not every gay man is wired the same, and there is definitely a community of young pleasant looking guys who want more than a quick hook up / don't feel they can attract Instagram models  either & find "dad bods" sexy.

I had an older client many years ago (gay man) who used to flirt with the waiter when we'd be out at dinner. He was in his 60s ( me in my late 20s) and I always marveled at the number of times he's get the young handsome waiter's digits.  I asked him once how he gets up the nerve...his answer was iconic: "What's the worst that can happen ?...they just say no".  *classic*

He was so right.  NEVER assume you can't attract someone until you try.

 

 

Awesome advice! Thank you

[+ sniper]

On 9/26/2022 at 9:01 AM, pubic_assistance said:

We have to agree to disagree, because I have a very different experience that you do.

My inbox is full every time I log on to Grindr.

 

But you're not a bear, either,if that profile pic is you...we're specifically talking about older guys with a few extra pounds, we are less likely to be pulling as many as you...

[+ Vegas_Millennial]

Grindr safety: use a condom!

Enjoy!

[MikeBiDude]

4 hours ago, sniper said:

But you're not a bear, either,if that profile pic is you...we're specifically talking about older guys with a few extra pounds, we are less likely to be pulling as many as you...

Confidence is the key. I’m a 66 yo bearish type. While my Grindr inbox isn’t “full”, I don’t have problems finding younger guys who are interested.

[+ sniper]

40 minutes ago, MikeBiDude said:

Confidence is the key. I’m a 66 yo bearish type. While my Grindr inbox isn’t “full”, I don’t have problems finding younger guys who are interested.

Not saying you can't find people, just saying you're a lot more likely to have a "full inbox every time you log in" with that guy's profile pic regardless of age.

[Exploritor]

On 9/25/2022 at 10:07 PM, pubic_assistance said:

Then maybe I get more attention because I'm not gay.

My Grindr heading is

Bi Top Dad.

I get dozens of responses each time I sign on.

My age (51) is clearly posted.

I don't agree that you are drastically limited over 50. You may just need to lower your expectations about getting exactly your type.

That's what Rent.men is for .

 

It's also because you're a top.  If you changed that one word to "Bottom", you might be getting the occasional, "Is Daddy ever vers?" question.    Otherwise, I'm guessing your profile would have way fewer hits.

[pubic_assistance]

33 minutes ago, sniper said:

Not saying you can't find people, just saying you're a lot more likely to have a "full inbox every time you log in" with that guy's profile pic regardless of age.

Well...for starters that's not my Grindr photo is it ?

That photo is from years ago when I first started using the forum.

Secondly the fellow who started this conversation did NOT describe himself as a "bear". He said "beefy". Maybe a minor distinction but there is a difference.

[pubic_assistance]

24 minutes ago, Exploritor said:

It's also because you're a top.  If you changed that one word to "Bottom", you might be getting the occasional, "Is Daddy ever vers?" question.    Otherwise, I'm guessing your profile would have way fewer hits.

Well certainly fucking fresh peach is more desirable than jamming your cock in some dried apricot.

When I was in my 20s everyone wanted to fuck me.

When I was in my 40s everyone want me to fuck THEM.

Adapt or admit defeat

[Exploritor]

3 hours ago, pubic_assistance said:

Well certainly fucking fresh peach is more desirable than jamming your cock in some dried apricot.

When I was in my 20s everyone wanted to fuck me.

When I was in my 40s everyone want me to fuck THEM.

Adapt or admit defeat

You're not wrong.  But when you don't discover guys until you're 40, and also discover you're not a top, that straightforward advice isn't as simple to follow.  

[pubic_assistance]

7 hours ago, Exploritor said:

You're not wrong.  But when you don't discover guys until you're 40, and also discover you're not a top, that straightforward advice isn't as simple to follow.  

Life is never simple....adapt or give up.

Thankfully Escorts make things more straightforward for those of us who don't have time for complicated.

[Exploritor]

12 hours ago, pubic_assistance said:

Life is never simple....adapt or give up.

I liked the "...admit defeat", better.  This sounds... a bit extreme.  In any case, enjoy your insights.

[pubic_assistance]

2 hours ago, Exploritor said:

I liked the "...admit defeat", better.  This sounds... a bit extreme.  In any case, enjoy your insights.

We don't win every battle.

That's not extreme.

It's realistic.

There's a great line from the "Red Green Show" ( A Canadian comedy/ home improvement show ) 

"If you can't find what you fancy, then fancy what you find."

 

[MikeBiDude]

2 hours ago, pubic_assistance said:

"If you can't find what you fancy, then fancy what you find."

Or as Stephen Stills sang “If you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with”

[+ ThroatCummer]

On 9/26/2022 at 6:27 PM, pubic_assistance said:

I asked him once how he gets up the nerve...his answer was iconic: "What's the worst that can happen ?...they just say no".  *classic*

He was so right.  NEVER assume you can't attract someone until you try.

We miss 100% of the chances we don't take. That single philosophy has brought me a lot of success in love and life. I did a business pitch a couple years back and asked for something so freaking outrageous, it actually worked. In reality, I would have punched someone if they had of asked the same of me. But here we are. 

On the old beefy/bear topic that started this thread, I had a full head of grey hair at 40 am not the smallest dude in the world. But somehow every college baseball player with daddy issues can't get enough. Not every one of them -- and not even 90% of them.

But that last 10% are fucking amazing in bed. All you really have to do is not be a creep and show a genuine interest in getting to know someone. It really does work. 

Okay, sorry. This thread was distracting. lol 

 

[pubic_assistance]

18 minutes ago, ThroatCummer said:

Okay, sorry. This thread was distracting. lol 

No reason to be sorry.

Your contribution was very much on topic.  (More than I can say of certain regular commenters who segue every conversation into their own.)

Edited October 1, 2022 by pubic_assistance

[LookingAround]

9 hours ago, pubic_assistance said:

No reason to be sorry.

Your contribution was very much on topic.  (More than I can say of certain regular commenters who segue every conversation into their own.)

Happy for everyone’s amazing success attracting the twinks on Grindr. 
Anyone else notice the irony of guys crowing about their success on an internet chat forum of paying guys for sex? 😂😂😂😂

[pubic_assistance]

1 hour ago, LookingAround said:

Happy for everyone’s amazing success attracting the twinks on Grindr. 
Anyone else notice the irony of guys crowing about their success on an internet chat forum of paying guys for sex? 😂😂😂😂

Not necessarily.

You may hook up on Grindr but still not be attracting the kind of A-list booty that you'd really like to get into.

Rent.men gives ordinary people the chance to fuck someone WAY out of their league.

 

[jtwalker]

On 9/30/2022 at 8:49 PM, ThroatCummer said:

But that last 10% are fucking amazing in bed. All you really have to do is not be a creep and show a genuine interest in getting to know someone. It really does work. 

 

 

How do you get these young guys out of the hey, how you doing, hbu, pics, looking?, into?, where? sequence.  Is it me, or is it really hard to get someone to say something else?

Also, do you bother with ad copy?  If so, what do you say in your title and copy?

Finally, do you bother with the blank or faceless profiles?

 

[+ Vegas_Millennial]

On 10/2/2022 at 8:15 AM, jtwalker said:

How do you get these young guys out of the hey, how you doing, hbu, pics, looking?, into?, where? sequence.  Is it me, or is it really hard to get someone to say something else?

Also, do you bother with ad copy?  If so, what do you say in your title and copy?

Finally, do you bother with the blank or faceless profiles?

 

I meet most of my young 20s men in person, either at a gay bar, strip club, gay hotel, or gay cruise.  And then there's the occasional waiter I hit on.

I remember a 22 year old college graduate with a degree in chemistry, but working as a personal trainer, approached me at a gay strip club in Portland.  I thought he must be a dancer because he was so good looking and was approaching me for money.  Nope, he just wanted to talk with me.  We met the next night for dinner, drinks, and amazing sex.  I think I bought dinner and he bought drinks.

I'm 40, obese, balding.  So while not a senior citizen, I face similar obstacles.  Each year as I get older, fatter, and balder, I need to step up my personality and confidence that much more.  Thankfully, personality and confidence usually come with age, if a person tries to be well rounded.

I really avoid using the dating apps, but I'm on there.  If someone peaks my interest, I tell them I'll be at such-and-such bar at whatever time, if they want to meet me.  Otherwise it can be a waste of time.  And I don't bother with profiles that don't have a face pic as the default unlocked image.

[+ Vegas_Millennial]

On 10/1/2022 at 3:43 AM, LookingAround said:

...Anyone else notice the irony of guys crowing about their success on an internet chat forum of paying guys for sex? 😂😂😂😂

Sometimes I buy premium bottled water.  But most of what I consume comes from the free public fountain.

Men are the same way.  I like to buy, but I also want to swallow from the public tap.