Asian race play

[+ Tygerscent]

Not a simple topic… I mean we use words every day that given the context and intention can be either supportive and endearing or damaging and critical. Words like babe, boy, Liberal, conservative, you name it… You can take just about anything and what really initiates an impact is the intent and the context… Sometimes people will misunderstand the intent if they are outside of the context. That in itself can be damaging… You never know what another persons past experiences are or how they intend themselves to interpret something they’re seeing or hearing. I could say this word: “bijnibipple ChA~!” 
without really knowing what it means… It could mean anything and be applied to anything depending on how one uses the word and what the intent is for using it. I could call somebody that out of anger and that’s what it would mean. I could call somebody that because I think they’re just the cutest thing in the world and it could mean that… I could call them that in a really cute way but my intention might be to say it out of anger and it would mean that. Part of getting to the reality of the situation is trying to understand things objectively and perhaps not reacting to them so quickly. I’m not saying that race play is either right or wrong, good or evil… It really depends on the circumstance, the context and the intent. It also involves the viewer who may love or take offense at something.  
 There seems a strong likelihood that one has a responsibility for one’s actions and words when then can be misinterpreted by the people around you. Not that a person is, (persons are),  responsible for interpreting things for other people but, understand that they may not understand the intention and they may not see the context which some words, actions, sensual or sexual acts take place… If you know that something is going to be said or done and probably taken the wrong way, how responsible is the delivering party~? I’m wondering if that is the question here…

 Comedians deal with this frequently~ 
 Are they funny or damaging… and to whom and how~? 

Edited November 5, 2021 by Tygerscent

[RandyVue]

On 10/31/2021 at 1:38 PM, Lucky said:

I think having a fetish for Asian men is okay, but it would be great if you had Asian friends too. If not, then it does suggest that they might just be sex objects to you, some form of a lesser human, only suitable for sex.

Having a fetish is one thing, having your fetish be demeaning someone based in their race is an entirely different conversation.

Edited November 30, 2021 by RandyVue

[+ Tygerscent]

On 11/6/2021 at 4:32 PM, RandyVue said:

Having a fetish one thing, having your fetish be demeaning someone based in their race is an entirely different conversation.

Oh, Soothe me sweet dreams of Kor-Indian husbear… I’m physically attracted but, more so attracted  because it’s the blend of cultures that meshes with my own on many levels~ I can get my Jjimjilbang Jain on AND my philosopants off at the same time~  

(“Philosopants you say~?”… why yes, that’s when my dick has a mind of its own and is looking to share ideas).🤔 

  The male bonding in each culture matches my own~ Their smooth personal style and humor charms me~ (Italians too though). Earthy, intellectual, full of heart and kookie in all the right ways~ Where intimacy can mean friendship and not just something sexual~ Music, Food and world views similar to values I grew up with~ 

 I seem to have the best fun with these three cultures~  Although, Argentines and Sevillanos are also cultural clicks~

  Below are friends and family of people I know~ They are not sexual partners~ 
 It’s fun when people play, dance and sing with you… not dirty dancing but, celebration and ritual dancing~

 Mixed heritage here: Indigenous/Alsatian-Acadian, turko-Mongolian Tatar, Northern Italian and Jewish-Greek blend in this tea bag~ Lots of tribal feel that seems to blend in with these cultures~   
 It’s a familiarity that draws me closer… the sexual attraction follows suit~ 

Edited November 29, 2021 by Tygerscent

[marylander1940]

On 10/31/2021 at 2:27 AM, Kxev said:

This is a self harming fetish. And also does real world harm through raceplay social media and porn. White men who are into this, do you have some form of white supremacy and racial issues you need to resolve. 

If money is involved there's some acting going on... specially if the provider is told to play a part and engage in some roleplay. 

On 10/27/2021 at 12:59 PM, Sixpack said:

Well when you pay for pleasure you are engaging in demeaning acts too 

is paying for sex a bad thing? Some guys simply are busy, have money to spend and get what they want whenever they want by someone they find attractive. 

[+ DynamicUno]

22 hours ago, marylander1940 said:

is being attracted to a certain kind of men a fetish? 

I know of tops who mock effeminate bottoms... I think they should be grateful bottoms and appreciate them! 

It depends on the nature of the attraction to the guy as a person or as an object, and if there is consent.  The OP in particular called it a fetish for talking to asian guys in a sexually demeaning way.  That begs the question if it's only asians.  If so, why get off on demeanting guys of this ethnicity in particular?  

He may know some asian guys who like that sort of scene, and it's fine if everyone is consenting.  If he gets off on demeaning guys who haven't consented to it, then I think it's very problematic.

 

 

[Isrhunter]

Is this all Asians or just east Asians? 

[NYMassageAddict]

I would never speak to anyone in a demeaning way for my own benefit only. I would have to know that they are into it - and to be honest, I think my joy is more for their benefit than mine. But I do find the dynamic hot. 
 

To answer another, it has been East Asian only thus far.

[+ Lucky]

On 10/6/2021 at 6:36 AM, TumYum said:

ummmhhh.... yeahhhh..... i don't want to be seen as getting on any high horses here.... or come off as self-satisfied or smug, BUT.....

this is kind of problematic to me.

i live part of every year in southeast asia and my academic work is based on ethnographic work in bangkok and manila and i see in all too real terms the consequences of white people acting out their fantasies on asian people

i know this is in the FETISH category, but let me just say that actions (and words) have real consequences, even if done in the spirit of play.

Still true.

[+ Tygerscent]

On 5/12/2022 at 11:06 AM, marylander1940 said:

not me... but some black men are hiring escorts and requesting being called the N word... Race play is a rising fetish, an unusual request but something unthinkable before. Is it even listed on Rentmen? 

I guess some bottoms like to be dominated and used in a safe environment but this might touch other bigger issues about being desired by white men.

Btw I searched race play and I found this thread, that's why I bumped it. 

@NYMassageAddict Do you only do it with escorts or also with dates? What kind of things do you say to them and is there any kind of "safety word" they could say if you're going too far? 

 

Domination play and play that demeans and belittles a partner is relatively common. My past experience has shown me that people in positions of high responsibility and religion tend to like that type of play… They already give orders and carry a world of responsibility… sometimes they want to make no decisions, not be the all perfect authority figure… they want someone else to be that~ The domination and demeaning/slave/power exchange play are the big top and various forms of it play out in other ways in the arena inside: age play, race play, gender play, Adult babies, furries, coach/athlete, doctor/embarrassed patient & other fantasy play~ Various degrees of “depth” can be explored… as with any interpersonal interaction, trust is an issue and there are those who abuse the gift of that trust. So, in the imperfect world we live in, casualties occur but, also there is a lot of mutually satisfying play going on… it may verge on taboo, kink, fetish, the seemingly bizarre but, that doesn’t mean it’s unhealthy for the individuals involved~ They may even benefit from it~   
 I Worked for a bondage studio and did some out of the ordinary play there… there was nothing I did to anyone there who wasn’t seeking that kind of play on their own~ They came to the studio to play our their sexplorations  and fantasies on film while also challenging their own limits as they wanted~ It was always mutually agreed regarding what we were going to be doing there~ I did not push them beyond their physical, emotional, psychological abilities but, also did challenge their boundaries in ways they were enable and prepared for~ 
 Lots of people are racially motivated… sometimes they realize that they are and sometimes it’s part of who they are but, they don’t even know they are doing it. Discrimination isn’t always a conscious thing~ It takes some self reflection and self honesty to know what’s inside of you: how and why~ 
 What seems important to me personally is “the intent”… more so than perfect “non discriminatory behavior”~    
 There is healthy fear that involves discrimination of any given thing and there is unhealthy fear… there is healthy compatibility and unhealthy compatibility~ Same with discrimination: healthy and unhealthy~ an older vulnerable person needs to discriminate between someone they can trust and someone uncaring of their vulnerability and perhaps who is looking to take advantage of that~
 A same sex partnership person may find it healthy in the 50’s to discriminate oneself from those who would have them arrested or locked in a psych ward and placed under heavy medication or given hormone therapy to “cure” their “mental disease”. Maybe that same person loves having a sexual partner now that calls them a fag, cum dump, cock whore, pussy boy etc., where the final result is safety and pleasure rather than physically or psychologically being Ryan white on a fence post~ 
 For me… part of this is all the fine line between accepting of everything and judging of other things, (discrimination): Intent and mutual mind sets can make the world of difference. 
 It’s easy to respond to things… take the time to understand them first before passing judgment~ Understand them within yourself as well others~ 
 Race play may not at all be about race discrimination… but, something more if you look beneath the surface~ Other times can be blatant injustice and hate… but, it’s probably not always one or the other… 

Edited May 23, 2022 by Tygerscent

[+ Pensant]

11 hours ago, Tygerscent said:

it may verge on taboo, kink, fetish, the seemingly bizarre but, that doesn’t mean it’s unhealthy for the individuals involved~ They may even benefit from it~   

100% agree.

[+ Tygerscent]

On 5/20/2022 at 8:06 AM, Lucky said:

Still true.

Again… a matter of intent in the way words, phrases and actions are used~ Additionally, it’s not just a “white” condition~ Other ethnic groups/races oppress others and each other even within their own groups. Generalizing so broadly in itself lends to inaccuracies and an oppression of its own~   
 ie. I don’t personally use the “n” word or casually call someone a fag but, I know people who do use both of those words in groups or personal company and it not only isn’t oppressive to them but, empowering for them~  
 There is a place for judgment but, also something to be said for being objective~
 

[marylander1940]

On 10/6/2021 at 9:36 AM, TumYum said:

ummmhhh.... yeahhhh..... i don't want to be seen as getting on any high horses here.... or come off as self-satisfied or smug, BUT.....

this is kind of problematic to me.

i live part of every year in southeast asia and my academic work is based on ethnographic work in bangkok and manila and i see in all too real terms the consequences of white people acting out their fantasies on asian people

i know this is in the FETISH category, but let me just say that actions (and words) have real consequences, even if done in the spirit of play.

and the fact that belonging to a certain group by birth and not by choice or taste is part of this "playful fantasy". 

I've never heard or Irish Catholics like me having the fantasy of being called drunk, loser, brawler, dumb, etc. I can't imagine someone in Dublin hiring a Northern Irish protestant escort and asking him to dress in orange, sing "God save the Queen"  while praising the division of Ireland, etc.... but I'm sure some might have that fantasy because they want to be talked down, etc. 

[+ Lucky]

Demeaning people for their race is bad whether done in a sexual context or in the real world. It is not a "fetish." It is a sickness.

Edited May 25, 2022 by Lucky

[+ nycman]

1 hour ago, Lucky said:

It is a sickness.

Just remember, it wasn’t that long ago that they used the exact same reasoning and words to describe gay men.

“Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.” - George Santayana

 

[Kxev]

This is kind of hot.

https://www.boyfriendtv.com/videos/772441/asian-boy-loves-taking-9inch-thick-cock/

[+ DynamicUno]

5 hours ago, Kxev said:

This is kind of hot.

https://www.boyfriendtv.com/videos/772441/asian-boy-loves-taking-9inch-thick-cock/

It says the video has been taken down because of DMCA ..

[+ The Big Guy]

2 hours ago, DynamicUno said:

It says the video has been taken down because of DMCA ..

Sorry I don’t mean to be ignorant but what does that mean?

[+ DynamicUno]

8 minutes ago, The Big Guy said:

Sorry I don’t mean to be ignorant but what does that mean?

DMCA is A US copyright law, especially covering posting content online.  A site has to take content down if someone claims it is their copyrighted content posted without permission.  If you follow the link it says the video is removed because of DMCA.

[+ The Big Guy]

7 minutes ago, DynamicUno said:

DMCA is A US copyright law, especially covering posting content online.  A site has to take content down if someone claims it is their copyrighted content posted without permission.  If you follow the link it says the video is removed because of DMCA.

Thanks for the response!

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

1 hour ago, The Big Guy said:

Sorry I don’t mean to be ignorant but what does that mean?

It was what The Village People originally wrote, but later edited when they figured out how fucking difficult it was to make a letter 'D' and 'M' with your hands.

[marylander1940]

On 5/24/2022 at 3:05 PM, nycman said:

Just remember, it wasn’t that long ago that they used the exact same reasoning and words to describe gay men.

“Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.” - George Santayana

 

some folks still do, they still have it as card up the sleeve ready to be used. Even some folks in this forum have expressed being "uncomfortable" with gay marriage.

 

On 11/6/2021 at 7:32 PM, RandyVue said:

Having a fetish is one thing, having your fetish be demeaning someone based in their race is an entirely different conversation.

Some escorts have received requests by their clients to call them the N word. I doubt is a new thing though. 

[RandyVue]

On 6/2/2022 at 7:24 AM, marylander1940 said:

some folks still do, they still have it as card up the sleeve ready to be used. Even some folks in this forum have expressed being "uncomfortable" with gay marriage.

 

Some escorts have received requests by their clients to call them the N word. I doubt is a new thing though. 

I never said it was new. Im a former escort myself, so I know first hand that it isn’t new. I’ve had a handful of white clients ask me to participate in “race play”. The answer was “absolutely not”. Race play is  racism. It’s degrading someone or being degraded based on race, which is where I draw the line. 

Edited June 26, 2022 by RandyVue

[rn901]

On 11/6/2021 at 7:32 PM, RandyVue said:

Having a fetish is one thing, having your fetish be demeaning someone based in their race is an entirely different conversation.

Is it different than demeaning someone based on their gender or sexual identity? Degrading sexist, homophobic, transphobic language and role play are all over in BDSM. There was a time when second wave feminists contended such activity perpetuated sexism and sexual violence in the wider society. Fortunately, they lost that argument. If such BDSM is different than racially degrading role play, then explain how so. If one is acceptable and the other is not, explain how that's consistent. Where are you drawing the line in deeming what's acceptable and unacceptable for consenting adults to practice in the privacy of their own bedrooms? If such activity that is consenting and mutually enjoyable for all parties involved is deemed wrong, then how do you plan on remedying it? The law? Censorship?

In movies or theater, we usually are able to differentiate between the actor and the character being played on stage or on screen. But when it comes to sex and raceplay, that ability seems to evaporate. This says more about how acts of sex invoke emotionally driven reactions and positions not so thought out with the scrutiny of logic. There's something about sex that makes people want to control what others do in their own bedroom. It doesn't matter if it makes you uncomfortable or if it offends you, it's none of your business if you're not engaging in it. Adults have the right to engage in whatever consenting sexual activity they want to with other consenting adults. When determining what sex acts are moral and immoral, we should not let our own knee-jerk discomfort and our own feelings of offense restrict the freedom of consenting adults engaging in mutually enjoyable private behavior. No one has that right over the rights of others, no matter how offensive their kinks and fetishes are to you personally. 

Edited July 17, 2022 by rn901

[pubic_assistance]

On 5/22/2022 at 8:55 PM, Tygerscent said:

 It’s easy to respond to things… take the time to understand them first before passing judgment~

Wouldn't THAT be a refreshing change ?

 

[nycmassageme]

Let me preface this response with a blanket statement: this is my own point-of-view as a cis-gendered, upper-middle class, gay, Asian-American man. Please don't infer that my opinions/preferences apply to anyone other than myself.

I have had sex that involved race-play of varying intensities with a few different sexual partners. My experiences were all positive, meaning I enjoyed myself, and I'm pretty sure that my partners did as well. For context, these were men with whom I'd had repeated sexual encounters, many of which did not have a racial component. There was an established relationship (platonic or romantic) with a high level of mutual respect and trust. I felt safe with these men, and they with me, so we were able to engage in this particular type of play without fear of offense or injury.

I can't speak to why other people enjoy this type of roleplay, or if it's problematic; I can only explain why I find it exciting. Like many people, I have dealt with some form of "just a preference" most of my adult life (side bar: being "really into blondes and redheads" is not fooling anyone). So, for me, it can be validating to be desired because I'm Asian, with the understanding that this usually comes with preconceptions. In a sexual context, I can get off on playing into those preconceptions, however it would be foolish for anyone to think that they apply to my real life.