What's a question you absolutely hate being asked?

[jjkrkwood]

That question brings out SATAN from within the depths of my soul!!!

 

I think when asked in the context of Grindr, its a FAIR question to be asked. Afterall, you are not on the app looking to talk about the weather, and people are not mindreaders and cant know what you want, SEXUALLY.... It goes along with the following question "Are you a top" ? Gay sex has many options, so finding a "match" seems to be the goal.?

[Guest]

What’s up? Or Sup? . Not sure if it’s because English is not my first language, but it’s such a vague question (specially in Grindr).

It's just a greeting/open invitation to bring up what you wish, not an inquiry as to what you keep in your attic. Just like "How do you do?" is not really an inquisition into your health history. I do understand that it China, one would not usually greet someone with "你好吗？(Nǐ hǎo ma?}", which literally translates to "How are you?"/ "Are you well?" but would genuinely be interpreted as to an inquiry into one's well being. In China, one simply greets others by saying "你好 (Nǐ hǎo)," which just translates to "You're well."

[Guest]

I guess for me the question that irks me is "When are you going to hire a housekeeper?"

[Xavitv]

It's just a greeting/open invitation to bring up what you wish, not an inquiry as to what you keep in your attic. Just like "How do you do?" is not really an inquisition into your health history. I do understand that it China, one would not usually greet someone with "你好吗？(Nǐ hǎo ma?}", which literally translates to "How are you?"/ "Are you well?" but would genuinely be interpreted as to an inquiry into one's well being. In China, one simply greets others by saying "你好 (Nǐ hǎo)," which just translates to "You're well."

You took what I said and went to

It's just a greeting/open invitation to bring up what you wish, not an inquiry as to what you keep in your attic. Just like "How do you do?" is not really an inquisition into your health history. I do understand that it China, one would not usually greet someone with "你好吗？(Nǐ hǎo ma?}", which literally translates to "How are you?"/ "Are you well?" but would genuinely be interpreted as to an inquiry into one's well being. In China, one simply greets others by saying "你好 (Nǐ hǎo)," which just translates to "You're well."

Then why not just say “how are you?”. Seems like you overthought my post.

[samhexum]

are you sure you want to delete this?

 

I have added/altered many sounds on my PC and whenever it asks me that question Clint Eastwood says "Are you sure you wanna do that?".

[Guest]

I have added/altered many sounds on my PC and whenever it asks me that question Clint Eastwood says "Are you sure you wanna do that?".

Edited February 23, 2021 by Unicorn

[MscleLovr]

To answer the OP: Is he your son?

 

To which I always answer (with a smile) No he’s my husband

 

And I watch them closely to see how they handle the information

[Monarchy79]

I think when asked in the context of Grindr, its a FAIR question to be asked. Afterall, you are not on the app looking to talk about the weather, and people are not mindreaders and cant know what you want, SEXUALLY.... It goes along with the following question "Are you a top" ? Gay sex has many options, so finding a "match" seems to be the goal.?

 

This is why I respectfully disagree with you....

 

1.) Most people’s profiles on apps already answer those basic questions, regarding to sexual preferences.

 

2.) The “what are you looking for”, question is deceptive in nature, as it releives the asker of truly “putting himself out there” authentically.

If the said person then tell him what he’s looking for, the asker then has the advantage of then attempting to obtaining (faking), those traits, just to get the person.

 

3.) In the end, that question actually cheats the asker, and causes him to lose quite a few missed opportunities, as some people don’t specifically know what they’re looking for, and it could have been him, if he just found a more authentic way of breaking the ice, rather than putting the person up against the wall, with such a cornering question.

 

Further, whether it’s an app or any other form of interactions.... we are dealing with PEOPLE. And the idea that dating/hookup apps should give one the mindset, that they are ordering off of the Dollar Menu, is why so many sexual experiences for many these days, are dry, transactional, lacking in depth and full satisfaction.

 

My best sexual experiences involved flirtation, innuendo, suggestion, and the excitement, anticipation, and element of surprise as to what’s next. The metaphysical chemistry.

 

My worst, were from apps, where some thirsty tramp online asked me “what I’m looking for”, and asked me a battery of robotic questions, with the expectation of a “microwave” hookup, ending with his lubed ass spread on the edge of a half-made bed.

lame, unsatisfying, and I could have had a V-8.

Edited February 23, 2021 by Monarchy79

[Guest]

This is why I respectfully disagree with you....

...

2.) The “what are you looking for”, question is deceptive in nature, as it releives the asker of truly “putting himself out there” authentically.

If the said person then tell him what he’s looking for, the asker then has the advantage of then attempting to obtaining (faking), those traits, just to get the person....

My best sexual experiences involved flirtation, innuendo, suggestion, and the excitement, anticipation, and element of surprise as to what’s next....

Yikes. That seems like a pretty open-ended question. If you don't want to "put yourself out there," don't go into specifics. If someone doesn't want to hook with someone who's into flirtation, innuendo, and surprise, neither of you will waste your time. I now have a steady dude, but when I was looking for someone on Seeking Arrangements, I would always look at the section of what the man was looking for. If he didn't have anything specific, I would give him one chance to answer the question, and if he didn't want to answer I would move on to someone who would. I personally was not interested in spending money on men who didn't know what they wanted, and just wanted to "flirt," or whatever. Why waste both time and money?

[Monarchy79]

Yikes. That seems like a pretty open-ended question. If you don't want to "put yourself out there," don't go into specifics. If someone doesn't want to hook with someone who's into flirtation, innuendo, and surprise, neither of you will waste your time. I now have a steady dude, but when I was looking for someone on Seeking Arrangements, I would always look at the section of what the man was looking for. If he didn't have anything specific, I would give him one chance to answer the question, and if he didn't want to answer I would move on to someone who would. I personally was not interested in spending money on men who didn't know what they wanted, and just wanted to "flirt," or whatever. Why waste both time and money?

 

Would you walk up to a guy in a bar, and before even introducing yourself, just say to a complete stranger: “What are you looking for?”

 

Because that’s what guys regularly do online.

 

People “window shop” online, just like a shopper would in a store. No specific intention, but when they find that right item, they know it, and they purchase it.

 

Now imagine walking into a store, and as soon as you get in, the sales person is asking “what are you looking for?”

 

See how bad it comes off?

[jjkrkwood]

This is why I respectfully disagree with you....

 

1.) Most people’s profiles on apps already answer those basic questions, regarding to sexual preferences.

 

2.) The “what are you looking for”, question is deceptive in nature, as it releives the asker of truly “putting himself out there” authentically.

If the said person then tell him what he’s looking for, the asker then has the advantage of then attempting to obtaining (faking), those traits, just to get the person.

 

3.) In the end, that question actually cheats the asker, and causes him to lose quite a few missed opportunities, as some people don’t specifically know what they’re looking for, and it could have been him, if he just found a more authentic way of breaking the ice, rather than putting the person up against the wall, with such a cornering question.

 

Further, whether it’s an app or any other form of interactions.... we are dealing with PEOPLE. And the idea that dating/hookup apps should give one the mindset, that they are ordering off of the Dollar Menu, is why so many sexual experiences for many these days, are dry, transactional, lacking in depth and full satisfaction.

 

My best sexual experiences involved flirtation, innuendo, suggestion, and the excitement, anticipation, and element of surprise as to what’s next. The metaphysical chemistry.

 

My worst, were from apps, where some thirsty tramp online asked me “what I’m looking for”, and asked me a battery of robotic questions, with the expectation of a “microwave” hookup, ending with his lubed ass spread on the edge of a half-made bed.

lame, unsatisfying, and I could have had a V-8.

 

Those are some "weighty" expectations for a "dating app".... Not sure most people on these apps have the same mindset as you ? When you contact someone in the middle of the night for a booty call, the last thing you want is inuendo, subtlety and flirtation. You want to fuck and suck NOW, and alot of people are not as specific, explanatory or revealing in their profiles.... But your respectful disagreement is heard and received, although i still think the original question you cite as hated is Valid. .

Edited February 23, 2021 by jjkrkwood

[+ ButchAtl]

So tell me about yourself? I hate being asked this on interviews.

I was told a long time ago that this was a question you should not only expect and b e prepared for, but see it as a "golden opportunity !'

It allows you free range to sell yourself, provide info the interviewer didn't ask about, and generally emphasize those qualities you have that would benefit the position and/or organization for which you are interviewing. Don't dread it...use it to your benefit!!

[Rudynate]

There's a certain kind of question that people ask who want to short-circuit the organic process of getting acquainted where they want to know what your motivation is - like "Why do you like that," or "Why do you do that," - those sort of pseudo-therapy questions. I really hate them.

[+ 7829V]

How much do you make ($)?

How much do you pay in rent?

Do you own or rent?

 

I always lie

I tell them I rent

That I have a roommate

And that I make much more less than I really make

[Rudynate]

Would you walk up to a guy in a bar, and before even introducing yourself, just say to a complete stranger: “What are you looking for?”

 

Because that’s what guys regularly do online.

 

People “window shop” online, just like a shopper would in a store. No specific intention, but when they find that right item, they know it, and they purchase it.

 

Now imagine walking into a store, and as soon as you get in, the sales person is asking “what are you looking for?”

 

See how bad it comes off?

 

 

Context is everything. In the right context, that is perfectly appropriate. On a hookup app, I would think it was appropriate.

[Monarchy79]

There's a certain kind of question that people ask who want to short-circuit the organic process of getting acquainted where they want to know what your motivation is - like "Why do you like that," or "Why do you do that," - those sort of pseudo-therapy questions. I really hate them.

I wish I could “thumbs up”, your comment 1,000 times!!!

[Monarchy79]

I also hate intrusive “introductory” questions in social settings by complete strangers:

 

“what do you do”?

“Where do you live?”

“where did you go to school?”.

 

I always lie, and give the worst possible answers to these questions... as I feel like such things should be revealed organically in a conversation that’s actually an exchange of thoughts, and ideas.

 

I’ve always found people who ask these questions are trying to piece together an “idea”, of what kind of person you are, based on superficial factors that have nothing to do with depth, or character.

 

Very vapid

Edited February 24, 2021 by Monarchy79

[MscleLovr]

@Monarchy79 you only have to add to your list

 

”what do you drive?”

”do you own or lease it?”

 

and you’d have the typical initial conversational exchange in LA

[MikeBiDude]

When (not anymore) I had another family member in my business, when I would call in the first words out of their mouth were “where are you?”. This irritated me because my job schedule was extremely flexible (and mine to decide) over multiple locations. The “where are you” showed up to me as a challenge to how well I was doing my job.

[marylander1940]

@Monarchy79 you only have to add to your list

 

”what do you drive?”

”do you own or lease it?”

 

and you’d have the typical initial conversational exchange in LA

 

Are you a vegetarian?

 

Actually most vegetarians will just introduce themselves as such...

[Rudynate]

In the 70s it became OK to ask anybody anything about themselves. Those days are long past. I've returned to the conversational guidelines I learned growing up -- there is a host of things that are nobody's business and it is impolite to ask/talk about them:

 

personal finances: how much do you make....., how much did you pay....;

intimate details of family life;

religion;

things like brushes with the law, lawsuits, etc.

invasive questions about somebody's health;

etc. etc.

[marylander1940]

In the 70s it became OK to ask anybody anything about themselves. Those days are long past. I've returned to the conversational guidelines I learned growing up -- there is a host of things that are nobody's business and it is impolite to ask/talk about them:

 

personal finances: how much do you make....., how much did you pay....;

intimate details of family life;

religion;

things like brushes with the law, lawsuits, etc.

invasive questions about somebody's health;

etc. etc.

 

Does "are you a top or a bottom?" count as too personal?

well, depends on the situation but I'm sure in person sounds more personal.

[Monarchy79]

Does "are you a top or a bottom?" count as too personal?

well, depends on the situation but I'm sure in person sounds more personal.

 

I personally hate those guestions regarding “what you do” sexually.

 

Why?

 

Just because I may like to do those things, doesn’t indicate that I’m going to do those things TO YOU...

 

☺️

[Rudynate]

Does "are you a top or a bottom?" count as too personal?

well, depends on the situation but I'm sure in person sounds more personal.

 

 

Again, what is the context? If you are sizing each other up as potential sexual partners on social media, for example, it's a fair question. If you're passing the time of day with somebody while you're waiting for the bus, it's invasive.

[Rudynate]

I personally hate those guestions regarding “what you do” sexually.

 

Why?

 

Just because I may like to do those things, doesn’t indicate that I’m going to do those things TO YOU...

 

☺

 

 

I usually answer "just about anything," which is more or less true.