JB_Studio38

I feel like in America, there’s so many scams and scammers…it’s hard to operate sensibly especially in this type of arena. Now, what I’m about to say is different than what this post originally referred to (getting the whole amount on Zelle), but it’s still in the spirit of what’s being discussed (e.g. cash is King) I’m only sticking with seeing NEW or out of town clients in some cases, with not just a deposit: but an initial consultation fee/deposit BEFORE actually getting cash. Meaning, Zelle or other apps. Even though I’ve had lots of clients send without an issue, I will admit it runs some away… At the same time, I think the mentality of the greater Client community needs to change. This is not 2001. It’s not 2005. And it’s not even 2015. We are in 2022. Everybody is doing electronic payments. Uber, PayPal, Cash App, Grub Hub. All the other companies get their money upfront when you order their service. Yet, if I’m only asking a small portion of the session as “legwork” of the actual session, there really shouldn’t be an issue. I think people have gotten so comfortable with escorts/masseurs just “showing up” without getting anything upfront. For example: somebody today ask me for an outcall to the Kansas City airport. I don’t need an Uber to get there, I can make it. But, it’s an HOUR away from me. I send my deposit instructions, and the person didn’t bother to reply back. Which is okay because it probably eliminated someone who isn’t serious, but it’s frustrating considering it was the only seemingly real booking request I’ve had all week. People think they can just text a provider out the blue, and I’m supposed to stop what I’m doing, hop in my car, pay for gas, and be on my way…with nothing more than a lousy text message asking if I’m available tonight? What do I look like? What reason do I really have to believe that after I do all that commuting, the person on the other end is actually going to be there? Or that after spending 30-60 minutes “consulting” details and such, that they aren’t going to pull a “oh sorry my co-workers just came over, I have to cancel”. That’s rookie non-sense. I’m 14 years in the game. I don’t have time to be running around like a headless chicken every-time my phone goes off. There’s nothing scam about getting a nominal amount of cash on a pay service. I’ve seen people PAY CASH and STILL get scammed right in front of their face. Like literally, take the money and not do anything until they pay more money. So, that means nothing in the big scheme of things. Sometimes it’s amazing at the end of the day: The person on the other end may be willing to be a paying client, but they can be cheap and unreasonable on the initial go. I’ve already paid my money upfront: advertising, pictures, commuting, lodging etc. Some of these people want a free service: they want free free free all the way up until AFTER the service and then pay. All that is old formula to me now. The working for free, maybe get paid after on the back end: is no longer efficient.

Who knows…probably fake

I used to take up on some of the hardcore fantasies, which I won’t disclose for personal preferences…but I just don’t get into that as much no more. I’m not really marketing towards making clients into science projects or doing extreme kinks especially if traveling and staying in a hotel. Any such activities would have to be hosted by the client in a more private environment. Being an escort doesn’t have to equate to doing crazy, off the wall shit to get paid. Some guys come with a hope that we can accommodate anything, I’ve had to cut clients off that try to go too far. One guy wanted me to play rape him with a (non loaded pellet) gun. I did it, it was kinda fun…but also a little overboard and strange considering he (used to be) a regular client (before I blocked him for being a flaky idiot one too many times) and I just hate sometimes feeling like gay sex has to equate to odd and crazy fetishes. Plus at the end of the day, I don’t always get paid enough to carry out such tasks. If I’m going to be playing “sneak into your house and rape you”, I better damn well be getting paid like an actor to do the damn thing.

I’m curious: can you provide an actual sample of the conversation. That way we can decipher what may be the issue.

This is a bit of a different situation than what I’m referring to. The circumstances I refer to are the ones who don’t meet after calling in sick last minute, and usually don’t leave anything in compensation. Often times, this occurs in the morning (almost like they just wake up, and suddenly change their minds - or are no longer drunk/horny/high versus a case of being sick) In your case, it wouldn’t of been the worst thing to just meet him, then give something partial and hold until next time. And just a disclaimer: I don’t recommend anyone risking it to not get the provider sick, however…I’m bringing up this topic because in the past couple months, I’ve had like 4-5 clients call in sick at the last minute. Of all of them, I can say I didn’t actually believe any of them were being truthful, especially since they were all text messaged. Which gives me no real evidence of it being true.

If everyone did that accordingly, I probably wouldn’t ever have to question about it lol.

Me personally: I am asking for partial donations upfront from new clients. I’ve not gone the route of half, because it is more for the initial consultation. That said, the 🚩 flag isn’t so much that the person asked for half upfront, the flag is that there wasn’t an exchange of numbers and the discussion is taking place on messenger without (as I assume?) no number provided or exchanged. Then, doing gift card stuff is the other give away. Similar to how I don’t book clients from the RM messenger or A4A without a phone number, you would at least want to have a number. And make sure it’s not some phony text mail or other knock off service either. Some client yesterday arranged a booking on text mail with me, which I didn’t realize until I called upon arrival. I blocked him 2 years ago for weird behavior, but he slipped thru and was even more off than the last time 🤦🏽‍♂️ That said: there’s people out there who think everyone who’s asks for payment ahead is a scam. I’m staying committed to my new way of doing things. Many are accustomed to pay upfront in full for Uber, Priceline, and pretty much everything else online. Hiring an escort online really shouldn’t be much different. The business just hasn’t evolve enough to be able to do that, but I’m doing what I need to do for now. There’s a separate escort forum overseas where someone discussed how they used to be in the biz in the early 2000s, and was busy busy. Person retired and then returned and noticed so many calls nowadays aren’t serious. I feel the same. I don’t know what it is, but for me it’s just better to have something to work with upfront, versus just taking randomly inquiries round the clock.

Hmm…I have to counter this slightly. I’ve reached out to many a client after the fact or down the line and it hasn’t been an issue. Unless the person specifically asks you not to, and/or doing it discreetly shouldn’t be an issue. Otherwise, how would traveling guys really ever reach out to regulars? They aren’t always “looking” on the sites, so a brief and non invasive message shouldn’t pose a threat.

You’re a good one 👍🏾

All of the above! But this is also why I’ve moved from deposits to consultation fee now. Because I was doing all that question answering, and then people would go silent or suddenly become ill when asked for deposit. Nope 👎🏾 I rather use that time to focus on other things.

Actually no, It wouldn’t. It would change my perception more if they couldn’t discuss the circumstance, and thought feeding me a fib is more integrity than leaving room to sort out whatever is actually the issue.

Yeah but some of these have been very annoying and inconvenient. Like yesterday I was just talking to the guy and narrowing down a time, I even modified something I was going to do today, because I didn’t want to have too many things going on leading up to the session. Question is: would you give a person a 2nd chance if they did, or have you found they even follow back up at all? I say this because I met a client who even confessed he lied about being ill when he cancelled the morning of. But he eventually kept the session saying that he was just having cold feet. That’s why I think I’m just going have to start start getting 1/2 upfront, before putting anyone down on schedule.

That’s what I’m saying. I guess some figure there’s no way around that, so what can I say. I wouldn’t even say cold feet, as much as probably juggling other contacts. Like how does someone just “conveniently” get sick the day were supposed to meet. Especially the ones with the Covid 3rd and 4th party stuff: a friend of a friend of a friend, tested positive. So now they have to cancel 🤦🏽‍♂️

oh okay, interesting. But what prompted specifically this question? On behalf of someone you know? It seems in many cities, clients want others to host unless they’re situated in a hotel. When I’m out of town I usually prefer to host, because some people have differing living circumstancess going on. Even had one last week who I drove all the way out, and he wouldn’t answer my calls or texts. I was livid. It was a house in a “industrial” area of town, so I didn’t want to get out and knock on the door or be standing there looking like a burglar. So I drove all the way back across town to where I was staying. Then he texts me an hour later, saying he was waiting for me but had phone charging🤦🏽‍♂️ He sent a deposit, but he had to send a cancellation fee to get me to go back out there. Fortunately the 2nd time he picked up and was there. He opened the door and was f-ing hot 🥵 🔥 so I was happy 😊 I can’t wait to get back into my own place. I will be hosting gladly. I never found having clients over to really affect my serenity in a place. However I am considering a 2 bedroom place next time, to have that separate area.

Yeah, that does seem fishy. Two with the same excuse?? In my case, I was just talking with a client last night about what time to meet today. Then this morning texts me about someone from a party he went to last night, saying they tested positive this morning. It just seems mighty quick for that to happen. But considering the person made partial deposit, I can’t say they aren’t telling the truth about it. If this type of stuff continues, I’m eventually going to have to go above and beyond what I’m already doing: start doing like air bnb, and just getting the whole amount upfront before even scheduling anyone. That way if it gets cancelled unexpectedly the next day, that’s on them.

Can I turn the question around: are you in the business and thinking of quitting? I mean, it’ll help if you can give some insight if you may be questioning the decision? To add to the question: I will say, the idea of “quitting” is often thrown around like it’s an “easy” thing to do. It almost seems like some people believe that it’s easier to quit than it is to have alternatives, or different ways of doing things. Fact is, that is not usually the case. Especially if it’s something you enjoy. In my case, yes there are things that make me dislike the business: One of them being the fact of not being able to accommodate bookings because they either come at unpredictable times of the day, or people expect to make things happen on such short notice within a small window of time, that I can’t make it happen. Then add cancellations (even with deposits, it’s still annoying to have because it makes you feel like you can’t truly plan your finances, schedules and expectations arrive bookings, because it’s too likely a chance someone is going to have a reason to not show). What I’ve found better than quitting is restructuring things to suit the circumstances. I don’t work the same way now that I did 2 or 5 years ago. That is a great position to be in. But, I get impression that the original question might not be related to when planning to comfortably retire, but rather: Being in a position of where one is considering to make a hasty exit strategy due to factors centered with the business.

I was going to bring this other the other day, but was like…whatever. However, this seems to be a common thing now especially with next day appointments. I know there may be some genuine circumstances of it happening, but this is becoming a recurring theme: I’ll get contacted for a booking, with I may not be available for right away. Try to plan for the next day, but then get a text in the morning that they’re either sick or someone been exposed so they might be exposed. Or get the ones who seem perfectly fine the day prior, but then today claim to have this or that ailment all of a sudden. One guy even told me earlier this week, he was in bed all day with strep throat, and it was only noon and he sent it in Adam4Adam. I’m almost sure that was a lie because, you don’t just “wake up” with strep throat. It’s something you have to get tested for, and if it’s that bad, generally it’s something he should have been feeling prior to that. I know people try to be cautious and considerate and not pass anything on (BS, because people out here don’t even be wearing masks when they have a cough or sneeze), but I just have a hard time believing it sometimes. I’m pretty sure at least 3 people in the past couple months have lied about being sick when they really weren’t.

That’s always good practice, sometimes I forget to do that more often, except with very regular regulars. The only caveat: sometimes it just doesn’t work. Sometimes too much time passes, or not enough time. I’ve reached out to regulars from 1 or 2 years ago, and never hear anything back. Or, I may have seen them on the way to a city, but weren’t able to catch them on the way out. Had that earlier this month. I reached out to 3 clients who let me know they had great time last month, but non of them could meet the 2 days I was in town. I probably could of gave a little more notice, but sometimes it’s hard to juggle clients in the current city, the next city, and the city after that. For most trips, it’s easier for me to start with a clean slate; and whoever sees me sees me. If they are a regular, all the better. However, if it’s a small market…I will often hit regulars up, before I even think about booking new clients.

The conversation took place over the phone. So it wasn’t just said, it was heard. And the tone implies nothing different. But I’m past discussing that situation though, because with that particular “client” it was a discussion that should not have taken place to begin with. So I’m more referring in general.

Right. That’s almost like saying: wait a minute, I seen Tom Brady playing football with a group of guys at a park…why should he be getting PAID to play football 🤦🏽‍♂️ It just goes to show the sheer stupidity from some of these dudes. But more power to them because I’m actually considering removing myself from the “apps”. I’m getting jaded from the repeated scenarios of meeting people with no end games from them. Even though I am growing weary of the gay bar scene, and being immersed in alcohol as the activity…it still provides a slightly better window of meeting people with substance. But all this crossbreeding of clients on hookup apps is a weird dichotomy and I feel may be contributing to flakiness in the business. Not saying clients aren’t going to do what they are going to regardless, but the hookup app environment doesn’t improve things. Even when I met a good person from it initially, it usually don’t go far because it lends itself towards a false sense of over abundance.

I personally want to get rid of the travel schedule. People get too confused or focus too much on travel dates. Cut that it out of the equation. To me, that only works if an escort is flying in, likely due to a business conference or other purpose not related to escorting. It doesn’t really allow those who have extended flexibility or in an area an uncertain period of time. It’s already been stated by a couple of clients that some guys don’t even bother posting or announcing travel dates. Maybe they don’t want to be “tied to” a window of dates. I really don’t even like to go anywhere unless I have a couple clients booked ahead. But I can’t do that unless I put a date in my ad, and I have to be within RM’s 250 mile radius of the city to have it as “near travel” without a date. Which most times I’m not. But that’s usually better because then I can explain to a client: NO: I’m not there now. YES, I am willing to come there once YOU and other clients are able to coordinate a visit. So I often had to imply that the travel dates I have listed are meant to be approximate windows of arrival. Then people get uptight when I don’t show up during those dates for reasons out of my control. And then I come off like a flake, when in reality I had needed to get a schedule going in order to proceed. I will say there’s an accuracy in what @BuffaloKyle said about how I feel about travel. There’s some things I’m finding that are becoming more occurrences, and it’s really souring the benefits of travel: #1 clients can’t seem to keep their word as much. Just today I had 2 appointments fall thru, one claiming to woke up sick, the other we had been coordinating for tomorrow, but then had some schedule conflicts. Fortunately I was able to keep the deposit but still: these clients were in small markets, where replacing with a different client isn’t likely in a day. So now, I have to cancel both those destinations. #2 the limitations of people’s schedules mixed with the limitations of when I can utilize a hotel room. I can’t work with people, if they aren’t willing to work with me. Many people try to book something between noon and 3 p.m. that’s not a good time if I’m only staying in a hotel for 1 day. I hear mariott titanium members get 4 p.m. checkout, but I haven’t racked up that many nights, as I spread my hotel nights between 2-3 different hotel chains that offer lower prices/better points-perks. Also I’m finding many hotels aren’t even honoring their word on early/late checkout. One chain touts 2 p.m. checkout for elite members. But every hotel I’ve stayed at, I almost have to beg just to get 1 pm. I usually don’t like people trying to come after 11 a.m. or before 3 p.m., because too many times rooms weren’t ready or the hotel was sold out and couldn’t offer later than a 12:30-1 o’clock checkout. Meanwhile the client is left waiting until I can. Traveling is starting to become more cumbersome than fun…And the main roadblock is caused by the hotels, and client’s limited ability to meet. I’m really starting to hate hotels. They don’t care about anything besides getting the most money for the least amount of time. You can barely a full 24 hours use out of 1 night. And many times, staying for 2 nights isn’t needed or resourceful if it’s only going to be 1 or 2 clients. I’m almost feeling I could be making more being in a less-competitive market and having maximum availability that’s not being dictated by when a client can squeeze in time, and how soon or late I can check into/out a hotel room. Pretty soon (and as it has been lately), it may end up I will only travel if my first client can accommodate an appointment in the evening. And if anyone wants to meet at the peak of the day, they will have to take 2nd place to someone with a little more flexibility.

Well, that’s easy to address. Maybe said guy goes to said cities often enough to have that regular base book him up. In my case: San Francisco tends to be more of a biennial trip for me: But I’ve not been since 2016 so…everybody I met, had been new clients. And…as been said, maybe “fully booked” means 1 or 2 clients a day, or per trip: if assessing all the variables. Like for example: I’m “fully booked” in Kansas City during some weekends. But that means I have my 1 regular steady client and maybe 1 newbie if I’m lucky, who keeps me all night+ a couple bbqs to attend. Otherwise, it’s usually pretty void of actually bookings. I can see the benefit of being fully booked by regulars when traveling to a location, but it’s not always the case. Like I said, I was taken aback last week when I went to a city that I did awesome last month, then I went again and it was completely dead. Not a soul to be found. However, that particular city isn’t keen on regulars, but rather: the closeted straight guy who wants NSA.

That’s a good way to do it. And to reiterate, even though I may discuss things in a way that relates to escorting when referring to cities, I just have a whole appreciation for travel, photography, and scenery. I was into travel long before escorting. It just became a natural transition into it, without having to be a truck driver to do it. I don’t want people to get me wrong. Maybe I don’t express myself the best on every post. I’m not mad or regretful about anything. When I refer to specific setbacks, that’s only like a few minutes of screen time and only in the context of the subject I speak on. All the other 23 hours of the day, I’m living my best life 🤘🏾 Matter of fact, while I’m at it: I’ll go ahead and throw in some pics/vids from my latest tour: IMG_5378.MOV The beach in San Francisco: View from hotel in Reno Ocean beach, SF the famous Castro view from Macys, SF Cool lobby of an outcall, Seattle Me cooking and having 🍷 in my air bnb Mt. Rainier, Seattle space needle Seattle Colorado Rockies Denver downtown at night

I just want to add something to this, without having to create a new topic… Despite everyone giving input, it’s not possible without the response of said person. It takes 2 to make a meeting. If a person isn’t man enough to respond, or if another isn’t man enough to send another response…then F it. I know someone (won’t name who) right now, on the forum…who hasn’t bothered to return my message in over a MONTH. And I know he got it. Does it feel a little dubious? Yes. But am I losing sleep over it? Not. Life moves on. If someone is busy acting fake and phony, it’s just a sign that there’s other people out there who can appreciate my time more. Part of the dichotomy in being a provider, is I don’t do fake and phoniness. Yet we deal with it all the time. Escorts can be fake, clients can be fake. It’s so much fakery. And by being fake, I mean…not being transparent. Being evasive, saying one thing and doing something completely contrary, not being reliable in situations, etc. I did 2 “gay events” over the past few months, and even though they were fun and lucrative experiences, there was so much fakery. Everyone from the event coordinators to the performers to the audience. At the same time, it’s a revelation to realize: some environments, some “personas”, some connections were never designed to be real in the first place. Being “imaginary” is what made Disney World so popular after all. The faker, the better. You avoid the burden of reality and being real. Only thing I can say is, perhaps a provider may have their own things to contend with, so perhaps not responding it’s their way of dealing with it (again, assuming #1 the message was even received. Which is why I said earlier, another person has to be man enough to message AGAIN) However, if it’s clear the person can’t be bothered, be done with it.

Hmm, no it ain’t a placebo lol. Last night I took my natural herb supplements in the evening because I forgot to earlier in the day, had a bedtime boner that just wouldn’t go away for a awhile. But I didn’t want to “handle it” because I need to save it for the real thing. Some of these things have been used traditionally by tribes.