pubic_assistance

I'm gonna tackle this question after also reading all the other commentary that's been shared. I will precede my "analysis" with an explanation. Although shared before on C.o.M., you may not know where I am coming from. When I was in my early 30's, I identified as a gay man. I started dating men after many years of exclusively dating women.(Although sexually active with both). I am sharing this information, to say that I also found dating gay men to be difficult. Although the initial connections felt "right", every situation felt transactional in the sense that I was somehow there to entertain my partner and once I no longer brought fresh excitement to the meet ups, the interest waned. I also noticed that gay men rarely have the ability to give up their hook up lifestyle even for a few months while they focus on a relationship. (I dont believe in long-term sexual monogamy, but I do feel its important as a method of imprinting during a period of focused dating with one partner). My opinion over all, is that dating gay men in NYC is problematic because there are SO many emotional distractions. Loads of parties, venues, and available dick that makes these guys dopamine-junkies. This may likely be why so many end up meth addicted, when they run out of external stimuli to keep the brain-chemical party going. The overall unpleasant result of trying to date a dopamine junkie, is ABANDONMENT. Your feelings of being "seen" by your provider were an unexpected reward in an environment where the power-of-the-purse had you in control of the moment. The comment: "why do you need to pay" was an ego burst of "you are special" commentary that your mom might have given you at five years old. So familiar patterns of feeling cherished, understood and satisfied ensued. Overall, you've managed to pick well, and have scored a true professional escort. Because these are all the feelings that a lonely person, who is frequently feeling abandoned would seek. He sounds like a keeper. When you date, you are both going to be looking for the OTHER person, to be making the effort to provide a lot of familar sensory experiences. When either of you gets lazy, (or exhausted), the magic is gone. When you HIRE an experienced professional, you are guaranteed a magic show without needing to pull a rabbit put of the hat yourself, just pull out your wallet to say thanks for a wonderful time. To be clear...ALL relationships are difficult. I ended up marrying one of my college friends (female). I never did meet a guy who I felt wouldn't ultimately abandon me when he got bored. The trick is to find someone who doesn't mind being bored with you.

Time for a new therapist.

The problem here is that this is a shifting reality. Every few years you get someone running for local office who "wants to clean up" their district. Prostitution is always a favorite target because it will fly with people from either side of the aisle,(for the most part.)

Well...I get laid plenty without hiring. So..there's THAT. As far as the frankness of my opinions being "gross"..I am aware that some may find it as such. You are free to join in that opinion. I am not everyone's cup of tea..and I dont try to be. But when I DO have a personal relationship with someone ..you will find I am actually far more kind than you may think.

I dont know about the "steroids" but totally agree this is very much typical millennial behavior. Thing is...hes over 30 ..so should be more understanding of the concept of being on time. Im guessing its more of a brain-cloud from being depressed and/or substance abuse to self medicate. Either way, my opinion stands...a little empathy required when dealing with people. Maybe 45 minutes exceeds some limits. Thats fine we all have tolerance levels. But I find the whole attitude of coming here to bash the fellow's business etiquette, while KNOWING hes going though a rough patch to be more than a little selfish and frankly gross. As @BaronArtz said. It speaks as to why some people NEED to hire to get laid.

Personally I dont have a problem with being late by 45 minutes. But ..I work in a business where I subcontract a LOT of different people and I live in NYC. So the idea of always being on time isn't realistic for a variety of reasons. If I was such a prick to people about being a little late, I wouldn't have anyone left who liked working with me.

I wasn't telling you to take HIM to dinner. I was sharing that when MY regulars are going through a rough patch, I take care of them. Same way I would any other friend. I am merely pointing out that providers are people and people have problems. Clearly this guy may be struggling to balance work with personal struggles...or maybe be dipping into the chems for comfort. In YOUR case, you are claiming he "stood you up", when in-fact he was merely asking to push back the schedule. So its not like he didnt show up at all. He explained his situation and was asking for a change of 45 minutes to the schedule. Hardly the most awful thing that's happened to your day. I would have cut the guy some slack, agreed to the later time and taken it from there. Shit happens and we all need to adjust a bit to make schedules work. If I got pissed every time a subcontractor's schedule didn't work out in MY business, I'd be locked up in an asylum by now for raging anger issues.

From the profile, it appears that the service is still an erotic massage. His "interests" include NO sexual terms (oral, anal, etc). Some providers have no problem with a happy ending but draw the line at full-on sex for sale. I can think of a few people who provide extremely erotic sessions, yet have always made it clear that oral and anal sex are not options in their repertoire.

Agreed. I feel bad for these women. Sex and the City television show was mostly a fun view and I enjoyed the show throughout most of its seasons. The "Just Like That" films are just dreadful. SJP and her husband are neighbors of mine. I would occasionally bump into Matthew while we were both walking our dogs. He's quite "normal" and friendly when you treat him as "just a neighbor". I can confirm he isn't a fan of the films himself. Says they should have left the series in memory alone.

I've met more than a few masseurs over the years who had some objections to full escorting, even though they provided erotic massage sessions. Eventually the number of regular clients asking for more is a temptation that gets them past their moral objection to the business of pounding for pay.

Delicious. Get me a spoon....I want to eat him up.

🤔 Was he supposed to get over his personal problems faster so you could get off at your scheduled time ? 🤔🤔🤔 Sometimes certain people forget that escorting is a very personal and emotional business. A little sympathy and understanding for providers when they've hit a rough patch in life would be expected. Personally, if a regular provider told me he'd been going through some bad times, I would have offered to take him to dinner, let him vent and paid him for his time without expecting "service" in return.

Exactly. Mine is low. So I dont discuss paying for sex with someone I haven't yet fucked. MY usual repertoire is to hire for "erotic massage". Explain what "interests" we have in common and let them do their thing. If I feel there's a nice vibe and the guy has some skill...THEN I ask about S*E*X for hire. At that point if you're sitting there with a cop who just jerked you off and licked your ass..hes got some serious 'splainin to do back at the precinct.

My advice (like a broken record). NEVER discuss sex for money. Tell them you are interested in their profile. Tell them you thought they were attractive. Tell them you have several "interests" in common. (If they list sexual interests) ..and tell them you would love to meet. Its NOT illegal to pay people for their company. It IS illegal to pay them to suck your dick or fuck you up the ass. So as long as you don't ask for that business arrangement directly, you cant be arrested. (And even if you are for some bizarre reason... they dont have a valid case. )

🤔 Why ? I wouldn't pay this guy to mow my lawn, let alone, suck my 'd'

I have visited all the mansions. My personal favorite was "The Elms". The Breakers is incredible...but also so over the top its obnoxious. The Elms is a more elegant (but also impressive) mansion from the period. You can buy a day pass from the historical society that lets you visit several of the mansions. Many include guided tours and some allow you to wander around and see the spaces at your own pace. The oldest synagogue in the country is in Newport. There are several museums of art, and numerous historic landmarks. The port area is full of great seafood restaurants, live music venues and shops (and good icecream).

If you enjoy history, then you will love Newport. SO many interesting sites to visit.

We go every year. I dont share this opinion with @Charlie As far as it being a place to hook up with hot gays. I can't say that I would recommend. Ive checked my Grindr (mostly out of curiosity) and the selection is weak) The nearby gay-romp village of Provincetown probably draws off all the local talent. Nevertheless, Im not there to hook up, but to relax and enjoy the beauty of this little sea side town. "The Cliffside Inn" is a fantastic five star Bed & Breakfast in a quiet residential part of town. Walking distance from the hustle and bustle of the Port's nighttime entertainment. The cliff walk is a beautiful way to see the many turn of the century mansions from the outside or you can tour any of the nine properties run by the Preservation Society. All of this is accessible by foot (recommnded) as you stroll through some of the most beautiful neighborhoods of private mansions, or take the free shuttle bus. Loads of museums great restaurants, live music, pubs and shops surround the old port. We love it there. Have visited many times.

Cute guy. Nice smile. Body seems to have a fluctuation from fit to a bit more fatty. So...yet another profile with photos from a range of time periods. (Look how hot... I USED TO BE).

Its always amusing when people compare their hometown rent to those of NYC. "I only pay $2K"...ok...but you live in BALTIMORE. Location*Location*Location

I get $5700/mo. for my one bedroom/one bath walk ups. So I am gonna assume this 2br/2bath with a washer dryer for only $7k is in an outer borough section of NYC.

Site says he joined in Nov.'24 and hasn't logged in since February'25