Rudynate

Venmo is so easy - I love it. A lot of providers like Cashapp, but it feels sketchy to me.

I had a FB who was polyamorous. He was an unbelievable kisser. We would get so into kissing each other that we would run out of time for anything else, but it was a great time nevertheless.

How does being polyamorous make you immune to unsuitable attachments? I don't see myself as polyamorous. I don't develop unsuitable attachments to sex workers because I'm able to compartmentalize. And I'm very clear that I'm not looking for love where it's not to be found.

That's me, also. I'm so clear that I'm hiring for sex and not for romance that I have never experienced more than a brief infatuation with an escort. I recently hired a Brazilian dream boat who was just very nice to be around in addition to being great sex. He might be my hottest hire of all time. Still, the extent of my attachment is that I want to hire him again. I believe that most of my hires have genuinely liked me, which is nice. And a few have contacted me afterward, but, still, their motivation was mostly to stay in contact with a desirable client.

A4A is the only hookup site I frequent and it is rife with scammers and frauds. Best not to believe much of what people say on there.

I've been doing it for 20 years or so. It doesn't turn you into a horny 18-year old or anything like that, but it does boost your libido and definitely improves erections. To me, the effect is noticeable, but not dramatic.

I learned to be polite as a little kid and I really learned the value of being polite and service-oriented when I was in high school and working in restaurants after school. Before I came to San Francisco, I worked in a retail business in an area where parking was really difficult. Right across the street was one of the few parking lots in the area and it filled up quickly. A nice old guy ran the lot and occasionally saved me a spot when he could. I started tucking a $10 bill into an envelope for him with a thank you card every couple of weeks and I never had to worry about a parking spot. One of the guys in management couldn't understand what magic I had worked with the parking guy to get him to save me a spot every day. He was from Morocco and from a wealthy background and had a HUGE sense of entitlement, so it had never occurred to him to just be nice and tip the guy now and then.

And my experience recently with hookup sites is that they are rife with scammers - guys who want you to give them gas money to come to your place, or they've experienced a health crisis and need $100 right away to avert a disaster. I'm used to the ones that want to teach you to trade crypto, but this is a new variety of scammer.

Congratulations on having looked reality in the face and surviving. It makes me crazy when someone comes on here and posts that they "have to hire." What is actually true is that someone has plenty of options, they just don't like any of them. By staring an unappealing truth in the face and surviving you have become stronger, bigger man. I know, it isnt a flashy satisfaction but then, a lot of life isn't that flashy.

He was in a lot of pain from a failed spine surgery.

That's actually not completely true. Once, I had a provider quote me a rate of $350, now that I think about it. I could imagine paying the right guy $350, but not this guy.

What I've been seeing is typically $300 for an hour and $500 for 2 hours. $300 for a single hour is more than I like to pay but $500 for 2 hours is right in my sweet spot.

I pay whatever is asked. i have never had a guy quote me a rate that I found unreasonable.

I just wrapped up a weird situation with an escort. This guy approached me on A4A - a very attractive guy, 28 yo. Initially, he didn't identify himself as a pro, but when I expressed interest, he revealed that he was a pro. I didn't like the deception, but, I thought, "I don't like it, but I can live with it." We started interacting by text to get better acquainted, and to talk about cost. But his initial pretense remained an issue for me, even though I didn't say anything. And then he kept doing little deceptive things, that I didn't like. Another thing that I didn't like is that he wanted full payment up front, no cash. But paying him turned out to be this huge chore because the payment apps kept refusing the transaction. Every time one of these things happened, I would think, "This just doesn't smell right," and I would bail. But he would plead with me not to bail, and I would change my mind, because he was "just my type." Finally, he told me he would take payment in gift cards, which solved the problem of paying him and we, finally, made an appointment. But my instinct was telling me that this guy was bad news, and I needed to walk away and I decided, "OK, I'm walking and I won't change my mind." I texted him to say that I was done, and of course, he tried to talk me out of it. I told him "I'm a bad client for you. You don't want a client that is as suspicious of you as I am." That did the trick. But I'm not sure that I have seen the last of him. You couldn't really say that he was an escort more like a con. It's a jungle out there.

So Equinox is now gay? Years ago, when they first opened in San Francisco in the FiDi, it was mixed, I would say more straight than gay - populated with FiDi types of either sex. I considered joining for the snob appeal but I really like bodybuilding gyms the most.

Yep. For me, the visual stimulus of a guy being just the right type is so important that compromising on the quality of the sex makes perfect sense, if he is that type.

I remember reading years ago that they were common in Japan. The idea was that they would extend across generations.

Who is suggesting that these would be good ways to end the relationship? It does happen though. One office I worked in, the owner's wife sort of ran things and wasn't a particularly nice person. One of her oldest friends was the executive director and she fired her by text the day she was supposed to return from vacation. I would definitely not recommend you follow this approach with your buddy.

That's not an insignificant consideration.

I went to high school in Rochester NY. It is one of those kind of towns that a lot of people don't leave after they finish their education. Whenever I went back to visit family, I was always surprised at the guys that I knew in high school who turned up in the gay bars. One of them was a wrestler who had a jaw-dropping physique. He also had an unusual face that made you think of a bulldog or a pug with striking blue eyes. I wasn't that attracted to him in HS but years later - when I saw him in a gay bar, I just thought "Wow!!"

I wish we had them. When I first moved to SF, gay gyms were all shirtless. Even some mixed gyms were shirtless - when I lived in the East Bay, I trained at a 24-hour fitness in San Leandro that was shirtless - in the mid-90's. When I first started going to the gym regularly, in about 1975, YMCA's were generally shirtless, but that started to change as more women started frequenting gyms. The women just weren't comfortable with a bunch of shirtless men.

I have worked with personal trainers and coaches a lot. I almost completely stopped training for over 2 years when I developed RA. I've been back at it for several months. Initially, when I started back, I hired a coach, but I realized I was tired of coaches and trainers and wanted to be more self-directed. I'm using programming from a British guy, Christian Finn, and modifying it here and there to work for me. It's going pretty well - I look like somebody who works out again.

I've had great luck - never had it happen. I hardly ever take chances when I'm choosing a guy to spend time with - I go for experience and maturity. Recently, though, I have spent time with a couple guys in their mid-20's - totally new thing for me. Both were just great - and I found that a a young partner with a strong libido jolts my libido. I'll probably be seeing more of these mid-20 guys.

He's a stunner, no doubt; but I have seen builds at least as good as his on guys who charge half his rate.

Since I have never encountered an escort being managed by a pimp before, I queried him closely about the relationship. He said he was the guy's employee and that the guy handled payments and scheduling, keeping a cut of everything the escort made. As I think about it, more and more about the arrangement was peculiar. I was going to do an incall and he told me he lived in Pacific Heights. Unless he actually meant lower Pacific Heights, it seems unlikely that he actually lived in Pacific Heights.