ApexNomad

The standard of male attractiveness, particularly within the gay community, has been shaped by a combination of cultural, historical, and media influences. Western media has long emphasized muscular, traditionally masculine looks, often depicted by white men in movies, advertisements, and fitness magazines. This standard became ingrained in societal ideals of beauty and sexuality, which were then reflected in gay culture, particularly through gay porn and platforms like Scruff. While these ideals are still prevalent, there has been a shift in recent years toward embracing a broader range of body types, ethnicities, and expressions of masculinity.

That SMILE!!!!!!!!! Oh how I wish I was that dog. Simply beautiful. ❤️

You’re absolutely correct. While jury nullification is not a formal legal defense and cannot be directly advocated for at trial, it remains an inherent power of the jury to acquit based on their own sense of justice, even in the face of clear evidence. This is likely a strategy Luigi Mangione’s attorneys will consider, especially if they can frame the application of the law in this case as unjust or disproportionate. Though unpredictable, such an approach could resonate with jurors on a moral level, making it a calculated, albeit risky, part of the defense’s overall strategy.

I, too, came of age in a pre-digital and pre-internet world. My work forced me to adapt to rapid changes, often with the help of younger assistants and nephews. I’ve never been on Grindr, though I know many who are, and I can’t imagine putting myself through that. I enjoy the comfort, convenience, and, for the most part, reliability of escorts. Your reflection captures a deeper truth about the evolution of social dynamics, particularly in queer spaces, from a time when mutual respect and a sense of shared community were more apparent. It’s not just about individual rejection—it’s about a cultural shift that, in many ways, feels less human. In the pre-digital world, face-to-face interactions demanded a level of accountability and empathy. Rejection, while still painful, often came with grace or at least an acknowledgment of shared humanity. That’s likely because personal connections weren’t as disposable as they often feel in today’s swipe-and-scroll culture. People understood that, regardless of attraction, there was value in kindness and maintaining a sense of community. It’s worth remembering that digital interactions don’t define your worth or the potential for meaningful connections—professional or otherwise. To return to your original post, and to approach this from a different angle, let’s take your chain of thought to its conclusion. If the providers had responded warmly to you on Grindr, what then would you seek in your professional interaction through a paid encounter? Would you be reaching out to them on RM purely for the service they offer, or would you also hope to cultivate something more intimate, personal, or authentic? What do you hope to gain from reaching out to a provider who was kind on Grindr? When someone engages with you on a personal platform like Grindr, it can feel, I imagine, more organic or reciprocal, which might create the hope of a genuine connection. But when that same person operates in a professional capacity on RM, their focus is on providing a specific service, irrespective of any prior engagement. If you’re hoping that their positive Grindr interaction might carry over into the professional realm—by that I mean mutual attraction or genuine deeper interest—this is where disappointment becomes likely. Do not confuse the two. It’s natural to want the fantasy of mutual attraction to blend seamlessly with the reality of a professional arrangement. However, it’s important to recognize that even a friendly or flirtatious interaction on Grindr doesn’t necessarily translate to deeper personal interest. Escorts, like anyone else, may enjoy friendly banter or casual engagement without intending for it to evolve further. Reaching out on RM with expectations tied to a Grindr interaction could create a mismatch between what you want and what they’re offering. If your goal is a fulfilling, professional interaction, approach providers solely within the context of RM. This helps maintain clear boundaries and avoids letting personal interactions influence your expectations of the professional experience.

You are the perfect example of what an exemplary provider should be—someone who creates a safe space, understands the weight of unspoken insecurities, and facilitates a sense of comfort and freedom. Truly, this is eloquent in its own right.

I loved reading your story - I wish you had more time together. Great memory to have. Thank you for sharing.

You’ll definitely get different answers to this, as you know. Speaking as a bottom, I’ve tried it all—but I stick with sugaring now because I feel it’s the nicest all around. I’m smooth, but I’ve had a few regulars over the years, interestingly enough, mention they wouldn’t mind if I grew it out. At the end of the day, tastes vary. What matters most is working with what you have, feeling confident, and above all, enjoying the connection with your partner. The hair (or lack thereof) is just one detail. It’s the moment you create together that counts.

We all know what happened to Veruca…

Anita Bryant’s legacy is a complex one—she caused real harm to LGBTQ people by campaigning against their basic rights, so it’s not surprising that many view her downfall as a form of poetic justice. But framing this as gays hating Christianity feels reductive. I would argue that the LGBTQ community doesn’t oppose Christianity itself; they oppose the weaponization of faith to justify discrimination. Christianity, like any belief system, can be practiced in ways that are inclusive and compassionate, or in ways that marginalize others. The backlash is against the latter—not the faith itself.

His tuxedo was literally on fire from all the flaming, and Kris was attending a chambers concert with his mother—that’s how they knew they were gay!!

Barbra’s memoir was overly curated, focusing on control and perfection, while Cher’s was raw, unapologetic, and full of vibrant anecdotes that captured her larger-than-life personality. Looking forward to part two.

My bottom ass enjoys watching two tops fight. 🔥😘

In another time, Barbara Stanwyck would have been a fascinating choice for Mame. While Mame is often portrayed with a certain whimsical flair, Stanwyck’s ability to balance humor with deeper emotional resonance could have infused Mame with a unique blend of warmth, strength, and depth, making her not only vivacious but also more grounded and poignant. She would have created a version of Mame that was both fiercely independent and deeply caring, with a complexity that reflected the resilience of the character, while still embracing Mame’s spirited joy and defiance.

I agree with the sentiment that it’s best not to be the one to initiate this conversation. If your masseur’s husband wants a threesome, it should come from him—it’s his relationship, and he knows how to navigate those dynamics better than anyone else. Another thing to consider is that you’ve already been with your masseur’s husband, presumably, without his knowledge. Even in an open relationship, that dynamic can get tricky. It’s one thing for them not to share details about what they do separately, but if you initiate the threesome conversation without that being disclosed, it could feel like you’re keeping a secret, and that might create unnecessary tension. This is why I’d suggest letting the husband take the lead if this is something he wants to pursue. It keeps you out of the middle and avoids any potential fallout that could harm your relationship with your masseur. Sometimes, leaving well enough alone really is the smartest move.

That really sucks, and I’m sorry that happened. You’re human, and you’re doing your best. In my opinion, it’s always so much better to give yourself the space to recharge and take a moment, especially in a field where intimacy—on any level—is being exchanged. Taking that time ensures you can show up fully present, and that’s what truly matters.

Sounds like quite the missed opportunity for National Geographic—and a loss for the rest of us. Clearly, some appendages deserve their own feature spread! 😉

Interesting profile. Handsome guy. Claims he doesn’t want time wasters, yet leaves three “Ask Me” boxes blank. It’s frustrating to have to ask questions that should already be included. No kissing. No boyfriend experience. Makes me wonder if he’s straight, but I hate making assumptions.

@Whitman you kill me with your finds! ❤️

Five languages, but somehow, the one most needed to communicate with the public remains a mystery.

This is the takeaway for me, and it’s so important. Patience really is a virtue. I’d rather a provider respond when they’re clear-headed than rush a response. There’s nothing more off-putting than reading a message that feels rushed, with misspelled words or signs of distraction—it’s clear they’re juggling multiple things. I can wait. When I’m working, people know they might need to wait for me, but I always make sure to respond in a timely manner, and when I do, they have my full attention.

@Whitman @Just Sayin Is this the guy? Andrew Wibbels on Tumblr WWW.TUMBLR.COM See a recent post on Tumblr from @atlantes96 about Andrew Wibbels. Discover more posts about Andrew...

I really appreciate hearing this—it’s reassuring. I was very young when I first sought out the services of a provider. At the time, I was very naive, but I had a purpose and a reason for doing it. Now, at my age, with most providers being younger than me by a few decades, I’d be lying if I said the thought never crossed my mind: “I wonder if this man thinks I’m a loser or desperate for hiring sex.” “What’s wrong with you?” It’s a brief moment, and the thought passes, but it’s there sometimes. Judgment and shame are powerful forces, especially for men, who are often taught to suppress vulnerability and emotional needs. These feelings can create a sense of isolation and self-doubt, as if seeking intimacy or help makes us inadequate. But the truth is, there’s nothing wrong with being human, with seeking connection or whatever it is we need. What you said really resonates—breaking free from that judgment and shame is essential for healing, emotional growth, and genuine connection.

I can only speak for myself too, and can say I don’t either. In fact, I’m very grateful for you.

This raises an interesting issue about internalized biases toward transactional intimacy and how societal attitudes differ regarding it. Reversing the perspective—do you think some providers look down on their clients because they’re paying to have sex?