ApexNomad

It appears there were no carbon monoxide detectors in the old farmhouse — a senseless and preventable tragedy.

I relate to this juxtaposition and applaud you for finding those moments of vulnerability. My real life is similar: constantly assessing, high-pressure and very guarded. When I’m with a provider, I make a conscious effort to let that go and allow myself to be vulnerable. When it works, it’s very cathartic and, in my opinion, one of the greatest gifts a provider can offer—a space to truly be free.

Respectfully, I find this discussion to be vulgar. Who gives a shit!! Unless you’re considering becoming a provider yourself, this kind of speculation is unnecessary. If you’re curious, you can always consult someone in the field directly offline. Otherwise, it’s really none of anyone’s business—just like no one is asking you how much you make. As I understood Kevin Slater’s chart, it was simply a breakdown of client dynamics (new vs. regulars), not an invitation to calculate hypothetical earnings. When it comes to money, the only part of a provider’s finances that concerns me is what he’s charging me. How he spends it or how much he makes is none of my business.

😘

@Whitman Do you know, by chance, if he’s a porn star? Happy new year, and thank you for all your posts! 😊

Wow, someone’s New Year’s resolution isn’t patience, I see. At least the confetti lasted longer than your tolerance. Cheers to a sparkling 2025!

Sorry for your experience; there were so many red flags here. Your tolerance is much higher than mine.

Ray is a fine man and an all-around great guy. My experiences with him have always been professional and enjoyable. I have a strong appreciation for mature men, and Ray embodies that perfectly. His physique is incredible, and he’s been in the game for a long time—and for all the right reasons. I’m a bottom, and Ray (who is verse) is a passionate and attentive top. I’ve never had any issues with him getting or staying hard, and he never watches the clock—he’s fully present and focused. Truly, a Southern gentleman.

China is the world’s largest manufacturer of fireworks, producing around 90% of the global supply. Not surprising.

According to this article in Deadline, the understudies didn’t have enough time to be brought up to speed; no mention of illness. That’s shocking to me! ‘Gypsy’ Gets Grinched As Illness Shuts Down Lucrative Christmas Week Performances; ‘Wicked’ Soars Beyond $5M – Broadway Box Office DEADLINE.COM Deadline's Broadway box office report for week ending December 29, 2024.

@ShortCutie7 @jeezifonly Kelly Clarkson would indeed be a great choice! Incidentally, her talk show is now taped in NY, so it’s theoretically possible.

1. Emma Stone 2. Megan Hilty 3. Sutton Foster

I completely understand and respect that. For me, tipping is discretionary. There are providers who simply go through the motions, and then there are those who truly go above and beyond, exceeding my expectations. When a provider stays past the agreed-upon time or offers exceptional service, I feel compelled to tip as a gesture of appreciation.

Before I met my late partner, there was a chapter in my life when I explored various desires and kinks, one of which was FinDom. It wasn’t something I dove into impulsively—I initiated it after much thought and with someone I trusted completely. He was a regular provider at the time, someone who had always created a judgment-free, safe space for me to explore my boundaries. We talked extensively before we began. Trust and communication were non-negotiable for both of us. He emphasized the importance of setting boundaries and encouraged me to articulate what I wanted. We even established a safeword, which I never had to use, but it added an extra layer of security and reinforced the trust between us. Financially, I took steps to ensure that I could immerse myself in the experience without compromising my personal agency. I created a separate bank account with a specific allocation of funds tied to a dedicated debit card. This setup gave me the freedom to surrender within the agreed-upon parameters, while still maintaining control over the framework. This wasn’t about blind trust or exploitation—it was about crafting a dynamic that felt safe and empowering for both of us. For me, the experience also had a sexual component, which heightened its intensity. There was a dom/sub element that appealed to me on multiple levels, blending physicality with the psychological thrill of surrendering in a structured way. He didn’t simply make demands; he tailored the experience with creativity and care, using the funds to enhance the dynamic—whether by purchasing items that embodied the fantasy or presenting them in ways that deepened the power exchange. For me, it wasn’t about humiliation or exploitation, because there wasn’t any. There was only trust, respect, and mutual understanding. At the end of each encounter, he checked in each and every time to ensure I was comfortable and that the dynamic continued to align with my expectations. I always knew I had the ability to end it at any time, no questions asked. That sense of security allowed me to fully immerse myself in the experience. The sexual aspect was deeply tied to the power exchange. It wasn’t just about wearing the things I bought for him or fulfilling a fantasy—it was about him owning me in every sense. When he was in control, I wasn’t just surrendering money; I was surrendering myself. The physical and sexual domination intensified this. He would fuck me in the clothes I bought for him and in the clothes he wanted me to wear; or in the back room of a restaurant he’d closed out; or in a car we rented. And so on. It wasn’t just the act—it was about him taking complete command. His alpha energy was undeniable—assertive, confident, and all-encompassing. I was his, entirely.

Just so I understand this story—you’re saying the rate change happened while you were in the middle of having sex with him?

It’s okay to feel deeply—embrace your emotions without judgment. You’re experiencing something unexpected, and that’s a sign of being human. Take some time to reflect on what about this person resonates with you beyond their appearance. Ask yourself what you’re hoping to achieve with this connection—are you seeking a deeper bond, or is this a momentary spark? Understanding your intentions can help guide your next steps. If you decide to share your feelings with this person, approach it with honesty but without putting pressure on them, keeping in mind the professional context of your initial meeting and respecting their boundaries. Be aware that expressing your feelings could potentially end the professional relationship, and you need to be okay with that outcome before moving forward. While it’s natural to wonder how they feel, try not to overanalyze their actions or emotions. Instead, focus on how their presence makes you feel and let the rest unfold organically. Emotions can be powerful, but don’t rush into decisions or assumptions. Give yourself time to see if your feelings deepen or if they’re just a passing infatuation. Lastly, consider talking to someone you trust, whether a friend or counselor, to gain perspective and process your emotions. While emotions are complicated, they’re also a sign that you’re open to connection, and that’s something to cherish.

A fine actress and dedicated advocate. She was marvelous in Broadway Bound.

This is beautifully written—so honest, nuanced, and deeply human. Thank you for sharing such a thoughtful glimpse into your life and the balance you’ve struck.

I’d normally agree about being called “baby.” The first time it happened, it caught me off guard. But the man who said it was a Latin stud (English was not his first language), and for him, it was clearly a term of endearment. He also called me cariño, lindo, tesoro, and amorcito, and would whisper other things in my ear that made me absolutely melt. With him, he could call me whatever he wanted, and I can’t tell you how much he made me smile.

It’s a power dynamic that’s best initiated by the client. Simply listing it as a menu option is more than enough for a client to take note. It’s not typically something that’s widely advertised, to be honest. Clients who are truly into FinDom aren’t focused on small transactions like belts—that’s chump change. FinDom often isn’t something that happens right out of the gate with a provider. There’s usually a test period to determine if there’s a good match, similar to meeting with a provider for a few sessions before deciding on something more extensive, like an overnight. I’ve noticed a trend of providers in their early 20s listing FinDom in their ad copy, which often comes across as incoherent and paired with sloppy photos. Perhaps unfairly, I tend to dismiss it entirely as a joke.

I’m also loving the champagne glasses for new years. 👍🏻

As the older guy and his gay friend to his young, straight/bi-curious friend, I think it’s important to keep things grounded and not steer the vibe toward anything that could feel awkward for him. He mentioned feeling uncomfortable taking his shirt off, and that should have been respected as the end of it. It sounds like he really trusts and values you for the encouragement you’ve given him about his body and confidence. To keep that trust intact, focus on the great connection you already have. There’s no need to coax him into anything beyond what he’s comfortable with. Being a real friend and valuing him for who he is will mean so much more in the long run.