DznNYC

Maybe he doesn’t appreciate the double standard at play here. The best providers offer the solemn promise of absolute discretion. Meanwhile, intimate details of their sexuality are shared in a public forum without a thought. Even crazier: he expressed his direct displeasure with the public sharing about him. And you said: “I’m gonna make a post about this with a link to his profile.” It’s not a sensitive subject. Sounds perfectly reasonable to me.

Honestly I just had my first condom topping experience ever as an escort last week. Even listing as a vers bottom, I still mostly top as an escort. And this was honestly the first time I’ve ever been asked to wear one.

Hahahah. I had the same experience - minus the lost undies - with a top client who I love dearly, and I believe connected with here. Late night train home was a *very* leaky experience Love a king who can give you multiple loads. 😈

Seems in my experience that most reach out over RM. Occasionally clients do have profiles there, and it’s nice to have some central details to grab onto for a conversation. Many reach out directly on WhatsApp or Telegram. I generally don’t have a preference between that or RM for first contact. Though I do appreciate being able to move a chat to text, if guys are amenable. I do try to avoid SMS texting or iMessage with clients. Partly because the encrypted apps add a small layer of protection for all involved. And partly because it’s a helpful compartmentalization. Nice to be able to keep texts with clients separate from texts with my mom. 🤷🏼‍♂️

I actually really love communicating with potential clients. Learning what makes guys tick is one of the great joys of being a provider. I’m always very happy to engage. I fully believe in a thorough serious chat beforehand. I think it can only make the experience better for both parties. I get more excited to meet guys when I know more about them What I think you’re missing here is the massive population that uses RentMen as a source of free sexting, with zero intention of meeting up. That’s when you get “endless messaging,” which only serves to exhaust and frustrate providers. I think it bears keeping in mind when you reach out to a provider in good faith, they’re often drowning in messages from guys who are not acting in good faith. And thanks for checking my profile! I appreciate you taking the time to clarify. “Which is it?” It’s very both. My willingness to engage makes me an easy target for lots of unserious conversations, which is why I chimed in here. But back to the topic at hand…. Some basic profile info - while not at all a requirement - can be helpful to move conversations along.

Maybe I’m the anomaly here, but I definitely read client profiles. And I appreciate it when they have enough information to skip over the basic questions. Any shortcut through the vortex of endless chat is helpful. Typically, I let potential clients make the first move. But if I see a particular profile visiting mine over and over, I’m not above sending them a hello. If they have a profile, it’s much easier to discern whether or not that’s worthwhile. Even a general reference to your sexual preferences helps me to know if you might enjoy what I have to offer. If you’re looking for Dom top bears, that’s not me. If you’re looking for twinks, also not me! On a practical note, the number one deal breaker I encounter is hosting. I don’t live alone, and as part of that I’ve agreed not to bring clients into the home. Clearly stated in my profile, but 99% overlooked. (SO many times, we’re ALMOST ready to book it, when the client is SHOCKED to learn I can’t host.) If you mention your hosting preference in a profile, that could save a lot of wasted time. A client profile doesn’t need to have a photo! (See literally a hundred other threads here about clients sharing photos.) And if advanced age is an issue for a provider, they’re in the wrong business! Not sure how a provider provides without a genuine love of older men. That should not be a concern More client profiles please! 🙏🏻

Love this topic! I’ll play!

I recommend myself!!! 🙋🏼‍♂️👅👅👅 Nom nom nom nom. It’s a genuine tongue fucking.

Could be as simple as a meetup at a bar.

Very disappointed I couldn't make it to the Palm Springs weekend. It sounds like someone needs to start an East Coast alternative.

VERY this! The massive population of men that have learned that RentMen is where you can go for free sexting with escorts. And that is their hobby, not hiring at all. Many of those folks populate this very forum. There's no overstating the impact of that population - soughing distrust - in all of our interactions.

Provider perspective: Not expecting luxury! A sensible lunch, with a range of dietary options, in a pleasant casual atmosphere is more than enough. When it comes to hotel needs? I would say: clean, private, and in a convenient location. Luxury is never the expectation! But a convenient accessible location is everything!

Hey guys, Just going on record here as a major lover of men over 65. 🙋🏼‍♂️ Connecting with men in that age range has been one of the great joys of being a provider. I would hope guys would never self select out of reaching out to providers on account of age.

Another case to be made for thorough pre conversations! Being clear and thorough with your provider in advance can only serve to make sure everyone involved is on the same page walking in the room. But jeez, this kind of a la carte pricing makes my head spin. The only bonafide surcharges I've asked for have been for photo/video.

This is VERY true, and in my mind, it’s one of the things you’re paying for when you opt to hire a provider rather than going the Grindr route. The burden of EVALUATION is entirely taken on by your provider. You evaluate their profile and whether or not you want to reach out. You evaluate their correspondence, whether they seem like a good fit. You rate their performance after the fact with a number of stars. You evaluate them publicly in The Deli for other potential clients. The same imbalance goes for discretion! Clients regularly post about who they hire and discuss all the private things about them here. Meanwhile I’ll fully take my client list to the grave. If you can’t get onboard with - and even fully embrace - these imbalanced structural dynamics, you shouldn’t be a sex worker. Old age is the great universal! We’ll all be there eventually if we’re lucky. Empathy for that is empathy for your future self I see no better way to embrace that universal truth than to do it sexually. Wrap your lips around it and get to work. 😏

Yeah, as a BFE provider, I would never ask a prospective client to send a photo. And - if I’m being honest - I prefer that they don’t. I never want a client to feel like they’re up for evaluation by me. I prefer that they enter a session unburdened by such concerns. There’s plenty of warning signs that you pick up on that might cause you to not meet a particular client. Sometimes they wave the crazy flag. Sometimes they’re asking for a scene that would be better fulfilled by a different provider. (That one happens from time to time, but I try to be honest when I sense that I’m not the guy for you.) But none of the above involves the external superficials: age, race, body type, or general appearance. None of which would be reasons to not meet a client. Sometimes the client wants to share a photo for his own peace of mind. I suspect to ease his own fears of how a provider might respond to meeting him in person. I welcome it if it puts the client at ease. But I usually feel bad when they feel the need.

Local providers will do all-weekend appointments in NYC!! Just sayin'... 😏

Yeah, I feel like there’s not a lot to be gained from endurance for endurance‘s sake. Like … “Look how long I can continue to pound on repeat!” I’ve got plenty of endurance as a bottom but continuing to pound over and over for hours can be problematic. You want to feel like you’re on a journey with your top, and sometimes endless repetitive fucking just feels like a long road to nowhere. It’s fully case by case though. Long sessions can be dynamic and exciting and highly connective. But I’ve certainly had tops who wore out - not my endurance - but my attention span.

Certainly there are men in NYC who would enjoy a scene like this. 😈

Not gonna lie, this is a major fantasy for this particular provider. 🙋🏼‍♂️ I’ve been asked for this kind of thing a number of times. But each time, the conversation has fizzled, and the person asking has disappeared, along with their profile. So my cynical self says: these scenes aren’t real. Just someone’s one-handed-typing fantasy. But at least it’s a compatible fantasy to mine. Would love to be proven wrong!

This is true. Rock Center in NYC was getting a lot of canceled memberships for inappropriate behavior. But also most of that was based on reckless behavior. There's a lot of hidden corners there that feel tempting but aren't safe. If you're getting into someone's shower, and the shower has a translucent door, you're visible to anyone walking by. You're going to get caught.

I love this question! I'm a big fan of the Equinox locker room in NYC. It's a financial splurge that I twist myself in knots to justify, but I do love it. Equinox is great if you're like me and you enjoy casual non-sexualized nudity among men. Agreed that Rockefeller Center is the best I know of for that vibe. You do get a lot of straight guys doing what I call the high-school-swim-team-change, where you fully wrap a towel before changing. But a lot of guys - myself included - are comfortable carrying a towel rather than wrapping it. Heavily mixed gay/straight population, which can sometimes be hard to navigate in terms of knowing who's who. In terms of mischief, Rock Center is still the best location. (You can find it at Columbus Circle in the steam room, but you have to be willing to hang long term in hopes lightning strikes. Liable to be a big waste of time.) The advice I'd give at Rock Center is: don't be fooled by all the nooks and crannies. Most of it is NOT a safe space. The cleaning staff is on the lookout, and the will bust guys for sharing a shower. So don't try that. The sauna may also seem safe, but it is not. The steam room - while the steam is on, with an eye on the door - is the only real opportunity. If you're careful and patient, you can have some super hot experiences there! Though the rule for me is... the hottest guys always want to suck me off when I'm on my way to a client. It's like they know!

I have searched for those! But to no avail. It seems our female counterparts have been using Twitter for this for years, and now migrating to Bluesky. Their starter packs are bountiful! Non gender specific so I added myself. But major waste of time. They gay market has committed itself to a single monolith website.

I don’t get the sense that my regulars are aware I also see other clients. 🤣 Or if they know, they prefer to pretend they don’t.

I would encourage you to never worry about ‘stalking’ escorts by visiting their page too often. Speaking for myself, I’m happy to be ‘stalked’ in that way! It shows that guys are interested in your profile. I tend to be proactive when it comes to profile visits. If I see someone viewing my profile often - or if I see something in someone’s profile when they view me indicating I might be a good fit for them - I tend to reach out with a photo and say hi. Still navigating whether or not this is the best way to operate. Not sure if guys are put off by it or if it comes across as too aggressive, but so far it’s yielded some excellent connections. But short answer: This escort is happy to be stalked that way! I wouldn’t give it a second thought.