ICTJOCK

I am definitely a multi faceted person.   Fitness ranks,  but beyond,  I'm certainly into landscaping of all kinds.   I designed my landscaping with my new home,  including the landscape pond I have off my patio,  gardening,   growing flowers of all kinds.   I taught horsemanship starting in 9th grade and through the end of graduate school,  showed horses,  so very much into horses,  rodeo and anything horse driven.   Astronomy,  travel, art. I'm a huge Civil War fan and a history buff and much of that comes from my Dad.  Spent a lot of time plotting and decorating my home,   it goes on.    

The sign looks fine.   Sounds like drama over nothing.    I enjoy eating there and checking out the items they sell up front.     I'm a rewards member as well.

The sign looks fine.   Sounds like drama over nothing.    I enjoy eating there and checking out the items they sell up front.     I'm a rewards member as well.

I don't understand why people just don't block all contact via phone, text or any social media at the first sign of trouble.  That way, a situation like this would not be able to develop into a black mail scheme.

I'm not sure what type of threats or extortion you're referring to (or if you mean it figuratively), but if it's the threat of exposure regarding sexual activity I would encourage you (or anyone in similar circumstances) to refer your extortionist to a case in 2003 in which the head basketball coach at Louisville, Rick Pitino, after a brief ("15 seconds" - which made Pitino the butt of numerous jokes), consensual sexual encounter with a woman at a local restaurant. This female extortionist was convicted of blackmail and spent SEVEN YEARS in a federal prison - and two years probation afterwards. I would remind any wannabe extortionist that most cases are easy to convict (save ALL communications!) and often carry lengthy prison time. And, you are correct that extortionists never go away - Rick gave this woman money for six years before he finally went to the authorities.  An extortionist who has been paid cannot be trusted to hold up his end of the bargain - they'll just keep coming back. NEVER, EVER PAY A BLACKMAILER or EXTORTIONIST A NICKEL !!!

I was careless last week and put myself in a position to receive “the” blackmail/extortion threat to be outed.
He gave me 10 minutes and I told him to save himself the trouble and go ahead and not wait.   Then I told him to go f himself and that I’m not concerned with rewarding the dregs of the cesspool with unjust enrichment.  I may have even used some words he had to look up.  But then, I’m willing and to be outed.  Only two people in the world matter to me and one knows. 

This site is certainly an education.   I keep learning things I've never heard of.     I appreciate the information and getting clued in!

I was hired to mow a client's lawn shirtless.   Happy to do it.   I'm very much into landscaping and mowing shirtless is very comfortable.   There was a reason to his "madness" , however.    It wasn't really about having his yard mowed.     He wanted a video and photos of me doing it and displayed them to friends.    Kind of funny.

I concur on the fingernail (or toenail)  polish.  I have a client is who bisexual,   and puts bright pink polish on his toenails.    I always kind of chuckle,  but to each his own I suppose!

I understand and appreciate your feelings, I've been there.  When I garnered the inspiration to begin posting, I experienced the gambit of troll negativity, from the pedantic condescendence to the unfounded, indecorous personal attacks, which initially dampened my spirits. 
After a time, it became apparent to me that this site, like most social media sites, is an extension of society in general where there is a mix of the good/bad/indifferent.
For me, it has been a positive journey.  I've found the "ignore button" within myself, which I believe you can do as well and just dismiss the troll attacks with a chuckle and perhaps some sympathy for troubled individuals. 
The trolls at this site are far outweighed by the nuggets of genuine information, encouragement, empathy, and humor.
"Keep on keeping on!"
 

An old gay friend who sold his $2 million dollar apt and left NYC after Covid recently telephoned to say, "You know what, I've decided I hate gay men. They're nothing but bitchy cunts." I had a bit of a chuckle. If you knew the gentle, loving gay guy who made this comment, you'd be as shocked as I was.
I probably don't post here enough to know what others are talking about. It seems to me, Mods step in fairly regularly. The mere scent of political interpretation presents a disappearing act like no magician I've ever seen.

I was hired to mow a client's lawn shirtless.   Happy to do it.   I'm very much into landscaping and mowing shirtless is very comfortable.   There was a reason to his "madness" , however.    It wasn't really about having his yard mowed.     He wanted a video and photos of me doing it and displayed them to friends.    Kind of funny.

I have seen this in practice here.   Probably for a variety of reasons.    First and above all,  things in writing can misconstrued  very easily,  especially if not clear in the first place.   Probably wise to consider all comments and response carefully when placing to make sure all clear.
Secondly,  with differing points of view,  experience and focus,  very easily to misunderstand what a poster is trying to say.     Added to that,  people are people,  we all come with our own challenges.    Some may be resentful  or jealous based on perception.     I try never to take criticism  personally,  but I will say I have seen it at play here.

It shows nothing except someone who wants to create an issue  when in this instance there isn’t one.

You remind me of an opposing counsel  trying to argue his client's position in court.   You certainly have your opinion and I have mine.    I provide the service,  One needs to be aware of emotional attachments and be candid and straightforward about  undue personal attachments.     In my business it isn't a problem.    Enough said.

There is certainly differing dynamics to this term.   Bottoms may be "all in"  on being submissive.    They may be submissive in general and feel more complete acting out their want or desire to be treated in a submissive manner.     Others may not be submissive at all.   In fact,  some may be type A dominant personalities,  but really get off on taking the role of a sub to another in the bedroom.     Other men who bottom simply roleplay.   They may be a power bottom and lead the top or switch it up and be submissive  depending on what their partner  (or client)  has requested or simply wants.
One challenge that remains is that many top men perceive a "submissive bottom"  as being a "submissive man"  in general.    That may or may not be the case.

There is certainly differing dynamics to this term.   Bottoms may be "all in"  on being submissive.    They may be submissive in general and feel more complete acting out their want or desire to be treated in a submissive manner.     Others may not be submissive at all.   In fact,  some may be type A dominant personalities,  but really get off on taking the role of a sub to another in the bedroom.     Other men who bottom simply roleplay.   They may be a power bottom and lead the top or switch it up and be submissive  depending on what their partner  (or client)  has requested or simply wants.
One challenge that remains is that many top men perceive a "submissive bottom"  as being a "submissive man"  in general.    That may or may not be the case.

I think most of the answers here are helpful.   To be  a "tip" is at the discretion of the client.   As a provider,  if I see a regular client and know I'm doing a good job,  a tip is certainly appreciated,  but not absolutely required.   I have different situations.   One client has to reschedule quite a bit and always gives me a tip as his way of thanking me for extra effort toward making that booking happen.  He's told me so.    I have other regular clients that tip me simply because they know I do my very best to see they are satisfied.    That's important to me.      I am not offended if a client doesn't tip me and know it's more a financial decision.

I am not on here quite as often as last year,  but I missed it.   Always nice to check in.

We’ve all seen it happen: A benign thread on this site that gets derailed by haughty and venomous users who seemingly delight in belittling and bullying others. Sometimes their comments reflect an inability, or maybe an unwillingness, to accept that others simply disagree with them. Perhaps more disturbing are the times when their spite and snark emerge with no clear provocation, leaving the rest of us to wonder whether participating on this site is worth the hassle. Either way, this mean girl dynamic — the bullying of fellow users into submission and silence — is difficult to avoid on Company of Men, and it undermines this site as a space where all of us can convene and connect.
 
Outside of reporting such behavior to site administrators — an imperfect response that raises its own set of challenges — I see no clear path toward curbing this dynamic on CoM. (If others have suggestions, feel free to share.) I am naming it here for the benefit of others who, like me, are troubled by the mean-spiritedness of some of our fellow site members. You are not crazy; some of our peers on CoM are terribly unkind, and their petty and spiteful communication styles can make it difficult to spend time here.
 
And sure, this is not unique to CoM. Aggressive and malicious comments from others pervade practically every online domain imaginable. But I find the mean girl dynamic on CoM particularly disheartening because of the purpose of this site. As a gay man of a certain age who is often invisible in bars and clubs catering to the gym-bodied under-40 crowd, and who engages in the type of encounters discussed on this site, I don’t have many people that I can talk to about my specific “extracurricular activities.” (I imagine this is the case for some — not all, but some — of you as well.) I was so relieved when I finally discovered this site after years of wasting time and money on unskilled providers just looking to make a quick buck. I was also incredibly grateful for the outlet (and on some days, the lifeline) this site provided during the COVID lockdown. CoM has the potential to nurture a spirit-lifting camaraderie for those of us who struggle to find it elsewhere. I wish some of us weren’t so seemingly hellbent on tearing others down.
 
Note: I have not named any specific users in this post, as the issue at hand extends beyond any single user. I implore anyone who chooses to comment on this thread to follow suit.

Great to hear the story and certainly sorry to hear he's retiring to Florida.     You never know what possibilities may have been had.   On the other hand,  he gave you years of fantasy and appreciation.    Enjoy it for what it is.    Some men never get this kind of long term fantasy and you had it for decades.
I'd of course want to give him a going away present.

Great to hear the story and certainly sorry to hear he's retiring to Florida.     You never know what possibilities may have been had.   On the other hand,  he gave you years of fantasy and appreciation.    Enjoy it for what it is.    Some men never get this kind of long term fantasy and you had it for decades.
I'd of course want to give him a going away present.

Great to hear the story and certainly sorry to hear he's retiring to Florida.     You never know what possibilities may have been had.   On the other hand,  he gave you years of fantasy and appreciation.    Enjoy it for what it is.    Some men never get this kind of long term fantasy and you had it for decades.
I'd of course want to give him a going away present.

I still live in the house I was born in back in the early 60s. The neighborhood has gone through its series of changes over the past seven decades, but a few things remained the same...until this week. 
At the top of my street (which runs off a main street, though not too busy) sits a gas station which opened up in the 1950s, just when my neighborhood was being built up. It started out as an Esso Station, then changed to Exxon (in the 70s), then Texaco, then a 'no name' brand. Most of the houses surrounding it were built around the same time, and the building boom ended around the early 1970s, as there were no more empty lots to build on. I remember going to this gas station with my mom or dad as a toddler. It was owned by an Italian man who immigrated here in the 1920s when he was a baby, and he opened this station when he married. It has remained a 'full service station' ever since (never changed to self-serve) with a one-bay garage for very small mechanical work. 
Around 1975, when I was starting middle school, this guy had his son - a recent high school graduate - join him at the gas station. So I was around 11, and this guy had to be 18. I remember driving up in the passenger seat, and seeing this gorgous young man pump our gas, open the hood and change the oil, and then stretch across our windshield and wash the windows - usually with his 'uniform' unbuttoned and wide open. I still remember his wavy brown hair on his head, his mustache and light facial hair, and the light hair on his chest. I realized I was gay from the first day he waited on us. (And he was so friendly and polite to my parents). 
As I got older and learned to drive, I would always offer to fill up the tank each Saturday, knowing that 'Kenny' was working. So I'm in my late teens, he's in his 20s, and now fully matured into a man - complete with a full chest of hair and dazzling smile. In the hot summer months, he always wore his shirt opened or no shirt at all - showing off his beautiful sculpted chest / arms. I lost count on how many times I sprung a boner staring at him stretched across the windshield washing the glass bare-chested. I remember to fill the tank up then, it cost $15 and I would give him a $20 bill and tell him to 'keep the change' (my mom and dad told me it was nice to tip, but that was too much! I didn't care - it was my money from my part time job!). Kenny would always wink and smile, and say 'Thanks buddy ! See you next Saturday'. 
As we got older, Kenny aged like fine wine into his 30s, 40s, 50s - kept the handsome face, the hairy chest, the muscled body. (He looked very much like the Playgirl model Rock Pamplin in his 1970s spread.)  The only difference was his wavy brown hair had a sprinkle of gray in it (including his chest) which made him all the more sexier to me. He'd make light conversation, but I was always too lost in his looks to respond - worried about the boner in my pants. My tongue would hang out whenever he stretched across the windshield and showed off his chest and muscled arms.  (In the meantime, about 25 years ago,  his dad passed unexpectedly, leaving him the business. That's when I stopped tipping him, when he became an owner.) 
I still go on a regular basis to get gas from him, especially in the summer. Now in my early 60s, I somehow found the courage to engage in conversation with him if he's talkative. The other day he broke my heart - said he's putting the business up for sale, as he's pushing 70 and is tired of pumping gas in the frigid cold winters. He plans on moving to Florida to be closer to his 'family' ( a sister and his nephews) in November.  This is the first time in 50 years that Kenny actually killed my boner.  And I didn't realize this gorgeous hunk never married, and never had kids. For the first time, I wondered the other day if he was possibly gay ?  Damn! I could've offered more than a five dollar tip over the years ! 
So it's the end of an era in my neighborhood. I'm going to miss Kenny, his gorgeous smile, his beautiful body even at 70 (he could pass for early 50s). If I had enough guts, I'd ask him to shave some chest hair and put it in an envelope for me - to have as a keepsake. But I don't have the guts. 

I commented earlier in the thread and mentioned I appreciate getting tipped.    I received several "larger"  tips during the holiday season from primarily regular clients.    I'm always appreciative,  but I never allow it to impact the quality of the service provided.   I have a regular client that doesn't tip or rarely.   We talked about it once.   He just doesn't do much of that and I don't judge him or anyone based on their views.