AZN_NYC

That is absolutely needed. He has tons of reviews on his profile so I have personally messaged a couple of providers there to make sure he is legit. All excellent feedbacks on the client so far. 

Make sure that friends know where you are and whom you are with. Personally, I would ask the guy for references from others he has hired in such a fashion.

I think round trip plane ticket and hotel room cost for the day you're meeting would be reasonable.  Uber for at least the trip to the hotel, as well.  If you stay extra days without planning to see the client, then the extras nights and return to the airport are at your own cost.
I'd say meals are also on your own unless it's part of the appointment with him.

Just ask him to book your ticket or send you the money for you to buy it. That's all! 

Half as good as I feel about 30 minutes 😉

I would not ask for a deposit but of course I do not feel like 100% the next time he asks for an appointment which is something he will lose FOREVER. I would take his request as simply an expression of interest and not a firm booking and would not go the extra mile to prepare for the appointment with said client. Once bitten twice shy, if he books me again and if I have nothing on that day, I would meet him,  but if I have other thing to do, his will not be prioritized. If this happens again, of course I would not want to see the client any more. I am kind of forgiving person and I understand sometime things happen, but the way he communicated just show that he did not have any respect to my time or me in general. 

It really depends on the distance of travel and the time of the day etc. Clients that expect providers to travel 3 hours on the road in the middle of the night for 1-hour regular rate session is not thoughtful and no reasonable provider would accept such request. Afterall, clients should understand that for every 1-hour outcall session, providers usually have to spend several hours prepping and travelling, those are unpaid and would not even be noticed. That's why many providers have lower rate from the 2nd hour onward but would have a higher rate for the first hour. Most importantly, by paying a fair rate, providers would be happy and feel that they are valued so they would give all-in for a great encounter. You do not want to meet with a tired, upset provider who accept an unfair rate just because they do not have other alternative. 

When pics are AI generated

I would not ask for a deposit but of course I do not feel like 100% the next time he asks for an appointment which is something he will lose FOREVER. I would take his request as simply an expression of interest and not a firm booking and would not go the extra mile to prepare for the appointment with said client. Once bitten twice shy, if he books me again and if I have nothing on that day, I would meet him,  but if I have other thing to do, his will not be prioritized. If this happens again, of course I would not want to see the client any more. I am kind of forgiving person and I understand sometime things happen, but the way he communicated just show that he did not have any respect to my time or me in general. 

This is the one scenario where I’d be cool with the escort asking for a deposit on the next booking. Although, if I had been the asshole client I would have already I sent you payment for the missed appointment and apologized profusely. Shit happens but a good client knows when they fucked up and they try to make it right. Since you’ve had good experiences with him in the past, I’d give him enough wiggle room to rebound. 
However, if he acts like nothing happened and he balks at a deposit, I’d walk. He’s an asshole and you’re not going to change that. 

I see it from both angles.
Since you had successful meetings with the client, that is a positive note.  But this no show no communicate is a real negative note.
I guess it comes down to client-value.  If you feel this client still has value and you're okay dealing with occasional missed appointments, then factor that into your price.  You could say, the next meeting would be 150% of norm, or ask him for the missed appointment cost.  If he baulks, then you know his value better.
Or if you think the behavior is unacceptable, call him out on it.  You could say, while we had good meeting before, a no-show no-communication is not acceptable.
But the overall double booking is going to continue in the marketplace.  When setting things up via apps and texts, there is a time gap.  Since the working out of scheduling is never an easy item, you should expect clients to attempt double booking or tentative booking.  Just as I used to do as a service provider.  I used a reconfirm process to adjust things and make sure it never caused client issues.

@AZN_NYC, in this biz the scenario you described happens ALL THE TIME. It’s particularly puzzling that you had two good prior encounters and then the client was so inconsiderate the third time. Knowing his double booking behavior, however, frankly I am unsurprised. This happens at times, even with good repeat clients, although less frequently than with first time clients. It’s like they treat us like garbage and expect us to be available on call, hot, fresh, and ready in 20 mins in the same way you order a pizza. Those clients can go to hell. I have no patience for it. I agree with @Jamie21’s approach, I handle a lot of it the same way he does.
When they do this, you can:
1) Refuse to see them again. Politely decline their requests. Explain -only if they insist on why- that they failed to meet their commitment last time, and failed to communicate, and that you won’t see them anymore.
You don’t need to explain how much it put you out, how it cost you other bookings, frustration, wasted your time, travel costs, etc. I feel all the same things you do, TRUST. But clients don’t give a shit about you, especially this guy, and others like him. He cares about himself only. He’s an asshole. Don’t tolerate working for assholes anymore. Save your breath too, because he will continue his bad behavior no matter what you say. Cut your losses and move on. Eventually you will develop a thicker skin to better weather situations like these. They will happen again. It’s unavoidable in this industry.
2) Or…require a sizeable deposit for that client next time, like 50%. Explain, if they insist, that they failed to meet their commitment last time, and failed to communicate, and that you will only see them if they send a deposit.
Many clients freak out and refuse to book when you require a deposit, and for good reason. Deposits are discussed ad nauseum in other threads so I won’t get into it that much here. Since you both have had successful meetings in the past, he should have every confidence that you will follow through on your commitment, not be a scammer, and not have the usual common concerns with sending deposits. If he refuses, there’s your answer. He’s clearly not serious enough to demonstrate in any meaningful way that he will fulfill his commitment to meet, or at the very least, communicate. He’s also not sorry he stood you up before either. If he was, this is his opportunity to make good. He will likely refuse and move on to the next guy he can mistreat and waste his time instead. That’s a client you don’t want, no matter how many successful past appointments you’ve had. Cut the cord. Force his hand so you can confidently move on and mentally refocus on the right clients and opportunities, and not let him continue to drain you emotionally.
Here on COM for the most part you get good clients who are more considerate and communicative than the average client. I’m sure nobody here in this forum is raising their hand saying “I’m the asshole!” and defending the types of bad behavior you described. Those clients are *usually* elsewhere, in the wild. This forum is an oasis of civilization. Out there, it’s pretty bleak. Work on that thick skin. I’m continuing to work on mine.

What can happen is someone who is 400 lbs may not present with any health issues, but as someone who got to 320 and is now 260 and dropping - your health is better if your in the right weight range for your body.  My naturopath says she thinks I will only get to 240 as I have a lot of muscle particularly in my thighs and legs (from carrying all that weight around for many years) 

I would never reject a client based on weight alone, more important to me is if client is polite and cleanliness is super important too. Sometimes, it is good to know in advance for safety issue such as using a proper massage table that supports the right weight. Some clients are very thoughtful and up front about this issue, and it makes providers feel very comfortable and give all in for a great encounter!

I know that clients often complain about providers who are late, no show, flake etc.. but I want to share an experience recently from a client that I was really upset about. The client was a great one and we had met twice before, both was fun and pleasant, so I was very excited when he called again to set up a meeting a few days in advance of his trip to the city. We exchanged texts to make it hot and I have prepped it well before the session (edging to make myself super horny). I also declined/postponed several requests the day before we met just to make sure I am in the optimal stage for a good time. On the day of meeting, he sent text early in the morning telling me that he will keep me in the loop on when to meet as he have some meetings during the day. Then throughout the day he kept silence all the way and when I asked for an update, he just texted back several hours later that he is still having dinner with his counterparts. I was wasting the whole night waiting for him and ended up so upset as it was already midnight and no update from him. Then I texted him that if he want to postpone or cancel just let me know. Still no response. The next day he texted me back "sorry, I fell asleep"! I feel like a piece of "sh*t" being treated like this. I know this business is transactional sometime and I hate it when clients have no respect for providers' time. Just a simple message to cancel/postpone would be so much helpful. Clients like this make me feel like quitting. Maybe I am new to this so it hurts me more, I have seen providers putting the note in their ad that "only right now, no advanced appointment" and now I know why. Just ranting after a bad experience! 

“You’re just a sex worker so it doesn’t matter if I flake on you, waste your time and treat your service like it’s something trivial” BUT “if I turn up then you’d better be totally professional and give me a great service or I’ll give you a bad review”. 
Guys, you get the providers you deserve. Treat them like shit?…then  don’t be surprised if they behave in ways that are transactional at best. Treat people with respect for their time and efforts and you’ll get providers that are in it to do a great job. 95% of my clients are the latter, they’re great, but a few are the former although they generally don’t get through to a booking. They’re easy to identify from the first contact and I simply don’t deal with them. 
 

I am sorry to hear you had such a bad experience. Providers like this will not last long or maybe they are not serious with this gig to begin with. It is frustrating for anyone when last minute cancellation happened. However, a notification of cancellation, even though last minute, is still better than no communication at all. With client ghosting, providers are in a limbo not sure what to do and just waiting in frustration, it is even worse if this is for a repeat client. I have had experience with a client that shops around multiple providers when in the city and  make "tentative appointments" with multiple providers before choosing one. I know this because he cancelled on another provider but that provider did not receive the text so still appeared at the hotel room and it was an awkward situation.  From the client perspective, I understand why he did this, he properly had a lot of bad experiences with providers who cancel last minute and just want to optimize his chance of finding a good one with limited time in the trip. However, by cancelling on others, he is causing an issue of trust with the providers and I am sure he will not be an ideal client the next time he wants to book them. This gig is only fun when both parties treat each other with respect and not wasting time of each other. 

Oh that’s awkward. At least he told you. I once turned up at an outcall and the guys wife and daughter were there. We go into the room he wanted to do the massage in and his daughter was playing in there. He said to me “don’t worry she’ll go upstairs with her mother”. Throughout the massage I could hear them upstairs. I asked him if he was ok with this and checked that he knew it was a sensual massage (happy ending style, done naked etc) and he confirmed yes all ok. He didn’t even lock the door to the room we were in. I felt quite uncomfortable but as I was there and he seemed fine with it all I went ahead but it wasn’t the most relaxing session (for me at least). He seemed to enjoy it. Paid me a nice tip. Honestly you meet all sorts of people doing this work, I’m constantly surprised. 

This has been covered a lot elsewhere, ad nauseam…..but let’s dive in again because new red flags crop up occasionally.
Mine are (from the providers perspective)
- Endless chat. I have one guy who crops up every few months ‘hi what’s your rate’…’hi can I suck you during the massage’…’where are you’…’how does it work’.. It’s gone on for 5 years. He’ll never book.
- Cock pics. Honestly I’ve seen every type of cock. Yours might be lovely but I really don’t care until it visits me ok?
- Calls from excited husbands (who are self pleasuring during the call) to book a surprise massage for their partner or wife….”she’d like you to fuck her”… No mate she wouldn’t appreciate that and I’m not doing surprises, goodbye.
- A text or message from clients who can’t type more than one word: ‘service’ or ‘massage’ or ‘rates?’. If he can’t be bothered to form a sentence how’s he going to be bothered to visit?
- Any enquiry that is ‘hey are you free now / in next half hour’. No, sorry I’m not free at short notice. If you don’t want me to prepare properly you’re probably not visiting for the right reasons. Have a wank it will be cheaper. 
- The phrase “I’ll definitely book” used during the conversation about services etc. It actually means ‘I’ll definitely think about definitely booking’. The interaction by chat and the booking in their head is all that will ever happen. 
90% of clients are fabulous. None of those red flags happen. The other 10% however could take up > 50% of the time if you let them however from experience the red flags are so obvious that you can just cut them off quickly. 
 

 
 

 
 

I always book a couple of days beforehand and  indicate I'll confirm that day and they can give me their exact address then. I confirm that morning and again when I am on my way. I have been late once and gave him notice and asked if it was an issue that required a reschedule. 
On the other hand, I had a situation where a provider canceled on me twice at the last minute. Once I was traveling to Chicago and made a mid day appointment to see him. It was an incall as I told him I was staying with friends. He texted me a couple of days before to confirm. I reiterated I would text him when I arrived and get his address. When I got off the plane I had a text cancelling, saying he had houseguest he forgot about. 
Then he was traveling to LA, my home town and I thought I'd give him another chance. Same drill. That morning he cancelled, saying he had been up late the night before.  

I am sorry to hear you had such a bad experience. Providers like this will not last long or maybe they are not serious with this gig to begin with. It is frustrating for anyone when last minute cancellation happened. However, a notification of cancellation, even though last minute, is still better than no communication at all. With client ghosting, providers are in a limbo not sure what to do and just waiting in frustration, it is even worse if this is for a repeat client. I have had experience with a client that shops around multiple providers when in the city and  make "tentative appointments" with multiple providers before choosing one. I know this because he cancelled on another provider but that provider did not receive the text so still appeared at the hotel room and it was an awkward situation.  From the client perspective, I understand why he did this, he properly had a lot of bad experiences with providers who cancel last minute and just want to optimize his chance of finding a good one with limited time in the trip. However, by cancelling on others, he is causing an issue of trust with the providers and I am sure he will not be an ideal client the next time he wants to book them. This gig is only fun when both parties treat each other with respect and not wasting time of each other. 

If all other info and photos on his profile are truly appealing, what is really behind the importance of those two digits when hiring? I’m guilty of it in the other direction. 

Fir example, I am most physically attracted to real-looking, hung, beefy, hairy men. 29+ I find that fully formed adulthood in men takes longer than for women.
Choices for me are limited on advert sites because both the provider field and the market appetites skew younger and more “perfect” 
So if you see in LA one of those handsome hairy lugs who is absolutely not passing for 35, send him my way😘
 

I know that clients often complain about providers who are late, no show, flake etc.. but I want to share an experience recently from a client that I was really upset about. The client was a great one and we had met twice before, both was fun and pleasant, so I was very excited when he called again to set up a meeting a few days in advance of his trip to the city. We exchanged texts to make it hot and I have prepped it well before the session (edging to make myself super horny). I also declined/postponed several requests the day before we met just to make sure I am in the optimal stage for a good time. On the day of meeting, he sent text early in the morning telling me that he will keep me in the loop on when to meet as he have some meetings during the day. Then throughout the day he kept silence all the way and when I asked for an update, he just texted back several hours later that he is still having dinner with his counterparts. I was wasting the whole night waiting for him and ended up so upset as it was already midnight and no update from him. Then I texted him that if he want to postpone or cancel just let me know. Still no response. The next day he texted me back "sorry, I fell asleep"! I feel like a piece of "sh*t" being treated like this. I know this business is transactional sometime and I hate it when clients have no respect for providers' time. Just a simple message to cancel/postpone would be so much helpful. Clients like this make me feel like quitting. Maybe I am new to this so it hurts me more, I have seen providers putting the note in their ad that "only right now, no advanced appointment" and now I know why. Just ranting after a bad experience! 

Sorry to hear this.  But it’s not unusual in this line of work. I’ve had some clients (repeat clients not just first timers) ask if I’m free on a day and then once I confirm I’m available they say they’ll message me when they are ready but without committing to a firm booking. Sometimes it works out sometimes it doesn’t but I never ever turn away firm bookings or alter my plans to hang around waiting for the client to decide if he wants to go ahead.
Some people have an entitled attitude unfortunately and they expect you to jump if they decide they want to meet. Fortunately it’s not the majority.
When they message and say “still free? Can I book for 3pm” or whatever, I take pleasure in saying “oh sorry I’ve now got a booking”. If guys can’t plan their day why should I have my plans thrown into disarray? Organised clients get the booking. Disorganised clients can take their chances. 

You mentioned you’re new to this. Good luck to you! You’ll meet a lot of fantastic clients, really great people and you’ll get a lot of satisfaction from it but you might need to distance yourself from clients and how they behave towards you (both the good and the bad) otherwise it will burn you out. 
 
 

The client in this case was definitely inconsiderate and disrespectful of your time.  Business travelers often have events that run longer than expected, but he completely flaked on you and you lost out on potential earnings on his account..I would say you are within your rights to avoid meeting this client in the future or at minimum require a firm appointment as a condition for meeting.
Hopefully the clients who are more respectful of your time will outweigh the ones who aren't.