Jaroslav

2 hours ago, pubic_assistance said:

Obviously we all know what's going on.

You seem to have completely missed the point of the legal ramifications for both hosting site and members.

I didn’t. And those who would be out to get us don’t either. Because…obviously we all know what’s going on.

If an officer pulls you over and says you’re going 15 mph over the speed limit, you might say you’re not speeding, you’re going with the flow of traffic, but the fact is we all know you’re over the limit no matter what you say.

No. 

3 hours ago, DWnyc said:

Interesting question but it shouldn’t detract from the point that friendships can occur through what begins (and may continue) ad a transactional arrangement. And ending that arrangement shouldn’t be a test of that friendship. 

That sounds like a deflection.

I don’t pay people to be my friends. Friends spend time together. My friends and I do things for each. Favors. Sometimes things with no reciprocity. Sometimes in our professional wheelhouse as well. We don’t “transact” such favors. That’s what friends do. My barber is a friend. He never charges me for my haircut. Just an example.

If you’d maintain the same relationship ceteris paribus without a financial transaction with these providers, then you’re friends as I see it. Otherwise it’s a client-provider relationship that’s friendly. Which is good, but not a friendship.

IMHO

@Rod Hagen– Would you consider circumstances where you spend time and have physical intimacy with these friends if money weren’t coming your way? 

4 hours ago, alexslaveboy said:

@Jaroslav same for me 

Sent him money for Uber and no show 

Told me that he was at our meeting location but I was the only one there

Had the audacity to email me the next day saying he would definitely be there if I sent him more money for another Uber 

Never was gonna happen 

😂😂😂

He had the audacity to follow up with me for a cam show. I didn’t dignify it wirh a response. 

@TruHart1, that’s why I want to have a telephone call before booking. And if the escort wants to book a hiring date before we’ve each sent three texts, he’s likely uninterested in providing anything more than cumming and going. Some guys want that. I do not. Like escorts can sense a time waster, I can sense someone out to use me. 

I have a friend I text first thing every morning. If he didn’t hear from me by noon, he’d be coming over to my place. 

I’m surprised to hear RM is only $30/month. The way some providers on here have talked about the cost of having a profile on there I would have thought it was a lot more. It seems to me some time back when I sponsored a guy on RM I paid more than $30 to do it. But that was so long ago I honestly forget. 

With inflation, people are looking to maximize their buck either way – clients don’t have the same spending power and escorts need more spending power. In order to secure any business, I can see some escorts dropping the price. Luxury goods (of which escorts technically are) often see their prices *fall* during times of inflation. 

He’s the reason I don’t pay deposits. I paid him a deposit to come to me and his Uber but he never showed up for the Uber and ghosted. 

10 hours ago, APPLE1 said:

In my experience, that's one of the many advantages of hiring repeats - - - he gives the extra 10 mins to keep your business!

I posed the question because, well, it’s not about the time! Except when it is.

My experience has been it’s not about the time with escorts that care about the service. Again – it goes back to mutual respect.

8 hours ago, Simon Suraci said:

Clients are paying for experiences, not time.

Finally! Someone who’s honest! 

4 minutes ago, Becket said:

IMHO a session is a "professional" hour. Whether it lasts 10 minutes or 60, I get done what I need to get done then get my ass home. I can't remember ever looking at a clock, or getting bent out of shape about time spent. Just cum and go, man. 

What if it takes 70 minutes? 

On 3/28/2023 at 5:00 PM, Jamie21 said:

Everyone is different. Some clients cum after say 40 minutes…and not by me being unskilled and failing to keep them bubbling away….they just get over excited and cum. Last summer I had a client laying on his front, half hour into a 90m massage shoot his load just because my cock was next to his face. “Jamie…I just cum” he said, and he called time. I asked if he wanted to continue, maybe cum again etc but for him he was satisfied and asked to use the shower. He paid me the full rate.

Another client who I first saw a couple of years ago did same after 15 minutes. Despite me trying to slow him down he didn’t want to relax so things rapidly developed and he shot his load. After that he was happy to lay down and receive a proper massage for the full time (with a second cum). He’s done the same thing every visit since that first time so now I just know that he likes to start like that. Everyone is different. 

But that was mutually respectful. Mutually. Therein lies the difference.

I’m giving the OP or the escort a pass here. Both were clearly in effective communicators, or at least lacking standard decorum.

I also don’t know that I’d say too busy for an hour is a lie. If it is, I’m pretty sure escorts have lied about their scheduling to me too. Not because I want 30 minutes but because their reasons for canceling last minute suggest they lost interest, got a more exciting offer, or even an offer that was willing to pay more than me. An escort who agrees and then when it’s time for me to come to him or him to be backs out, or doesn’t communicate anymore, is one who’s lied by the logic that the OP lied about being busy with work.

I prefer the German hesitancy to label people Freund. They stick with Kollege, Kommilitone, or Bekannte. Freunde are those who are especially close, maybe even physically so. I’d say escorts are Bekannte in most instances.

Nonetheless, Bekannte can be friendly (freundlich) and it’s rude, in my opinion, to ghost even as a Bekannte. The whole ghosting phenomenon in our world today is really a lack of respect and failure to appreciate someone else’s dignity.

Would it *really* kill someone to say “I’m done” – even if said rudely? I suppose if you don’t give a fuck, it doesn’t matter.

2 hours ago, DWnyc said:

Doesn’t mean a warm relationship can’t be a form of friendship, 

Eh. There I disagree. A friendship is different. Friendships don’t depend on “business doing well.” In fact, friendships will overcome difficulties quicker than transitional relationships. A friend doesn’t just disappear when the going gets tough.

Again, not a problem as long as it’s kept in perspective. As you say, you can be friendly with your doctor, but you’re not friends.

@DWnyc, he didn’t say we’re done. That’s partly why I asked about ghosting. No such message ever was received. He always complained about people not being decent enough to communicate even if it was unpleasant, but then he seemingly does the same thing. I need to take my own wisdom and remember that escorts aren’t friends and you can’t expect them to act that way. 

Ask. 

The very fact that you're asking here about a change in dynamic suggests that you care more about the relationship you have with him than he does with you, which is in some ways a problem. Escorts, while they may be friendly, aren't our friends as long as they're taking our money. If you offer more money for what you want above and beyond what you've been doing with him, and he doesn't accept, then that's just the way it is. He's more than likely not going to think differently of you because your'e a client and he has other clients.

Be careful of thinking the escort feels any kind of loyalty to you because of a historic past good relationship. Your loyalty and concern for him is probably, likely greater than his is to yours. That isn't to say that escorts are bad people or aren't friendly. They're just in this for the work component of it – otherwise they wouldn't be looking to get paid. As long as money is transacted every single time you get together, it's not a business relationship, not a friendship no matter how friendly you may be. I'm friendly with the dentist, but he's not going to check out my mouth for free.

5 hours ago, RadioRob said:

My general concept is that I'm not paying for an "activity".  I'm paying for time.  There's other things we can be doing outside of one activity... even if it's laying in bed cuddling and chit chatting for a bit once finished.

Regarding "can't be done" in 30 minutes...  over the years I've learned to never say never when discussing what's possible.  With that said, personally I don't typically walk into a room and get to the main act within the first couple of minutes.  There is typically a little time for pleasantries, the "warm up", the main act, and finally the cool down/wrap up.  While it's possible to cut a few corners, it lessens the overall experience for me.  Trying to do that all within 30 minutes would not be much of an experience at all.  

I’ve heard (not experienced) of guys cumming and going. Some clients are okay with that. Others want what they pay for, especially if it’s sold as time.

 I find the picking and choosing about if we’re paying for an activity or if we’re paying for time ingenuine. It can’t be time if you’re unhappy about the experience and it can’t be the experience if you’re unhappy about the time. Either we’re paying for time or we’re paying for experience, but you can’t pick and choose. And frankly, we all know it’s the experience. Call the sky green if you want, but we all know it’s blue no matter what you say (and maybe even believe).

On 3/27/2023 at 4:42 AM, Jamie21 said:

I’d say you’re both at fault. He was rude and you haggled over price. 
His rate is 300. That’s it, the starting rate. Looks like from the exchange that he expects to bottom. So he has to prep etc whether you book 30 mins or 3 hours. 
I don’t take bookings for less than an hour. It’s just not worth it and it seems that’s his view too, it’s not unusual. Often clients looking for half hour sessions are the same ones who haggle over price. Most guys I know will take a very dim view of haggling. It’s like saying to the provider “you have valued yourself at X per hour but I don’t think you’re worth that so I’m offering Y per hour”. That’s a poor start to what you hope will be a good session. For this reason, as soon as a client questions my rate I know for sure that they won’t book because I’m not reducing it nor am I going to do anything to facilitate the booking. That’s what he did….his response was that of someone who has already decided you’re not the type of client he needs. He could have been a little less blunt: “Sorry, I don’t do anything for less than $300”. 

This is the most reasonable response here.

From my perspective, both sides clearly are forgetting it’s people, not things. There’s little respect here from either direction.

2 hours ago, handiacefailure said:

If you don't have an isntant pot you might want to look at a Foodi.   Costco has them on sale a lot and it's nice having one appliance that does both functions.   I also use the Saute function a lot.

I am an instant pot prophet! I absolutely love my instant pot! 

On 3/25/2023 at 6:10 PM, Rod Hagen said:

I work with you, not for you.

I understand the spirit of this, but the one who is getting paid does work for the one paying. You can set the parameters of what you offer when, but ultimately the escort is working…hence why I’m paying. You’re working with someone if I ask you to bring another escort to work with you.

Arranging a mutually agreeable time to meet isn’t working with me. It’s arranging an appointment. And it’s especially not working with me if you tell me you’re availability and I have to accommodate you. Working with you in that sense means you’re just as willing to restructure your schedule for me as I am for you. I’ve hired very few escorts who will make changes to their schedules for me.

On 3/23/2023 at 3:48 AM, nycman said:

I agree. I used to have a "24-hour" rule, but I quickly learned 
if I don’t get a response within the hour, the likelihood of 
getting a response decays exponentially each passing hour. 

My 24 hour rule left me alone in a hotel room way too many
times. Even if they did respond after the 3 hour mark, those
individuals would often flake. 

So, 3 hours it is. 

I find it incredibly gobsmacking just how poor at communicating some providers are. When I hire, I want a BFE, so communicating is important for when we’re not fucking. If basic communication is a struggle, then the meetup is going to be poor. 

I’ve used a friend’s air fryer when over at his place making dinner. I loved it. It’s my next kitchen gadget.

I understand there’s a topic of this from 2022.

There’s a thread here about social texting and the fuzzy etiquette around that. What do you make of a regular provider who has engaged in minimal social texting every few days, sometimes every few weeks, who has said that courtesy means communicating, even if it’s to say we’re done communicating BUT then ghosts? Is the original statement about not dropping you like a used condom to be believed or is such behavior indicative that you’ve been ghosted and said provider is in fact no longer a provider for you, let alone a regular?