sniper

On top of the personal safety issue, it could also be to make sure you aren't someone they know from their regualr life,  which could get awkward. Say the provider turns out to be your coworker? Or brother-in-law?

The reality is in the mid 20th cenrury, in many communities the schools were sort of a back door public health/welfare syatem. They made kids shower because it wasn't always the case they did so at home. I don't think it was about spying on kids, it was about making sure they had basic hygiene.

I have the experience of being middle aged and having been young but only moderately attractive so I know the vapidness(vapidity?) of twinks amd twunks is a timeless phenomenon and not some recent development. And it's not unique to gay people either. 

I think it all goes back to my theory that men are like ducklings and imprint on what they jerked off to at 14.  Some expand their tastes. But most don't. 

I think it all goes back to my theory that men are like ducklings and imprint on what they jerked off to at 14.  Some expand their tastes. But most don't. 

I think it all goes back to my theory that men are like ducklings and imprint on what they jerked off to at 14.  Some expand their tastes. But most don't. 

I think it all goes back to my theory that men are like ducklings and imprint on what they jerked off to at 14.  Some expand their tastes. But most don't. 

I think it all goes back to my theory that men are like ducklings and imprint on what they jerked off to at 14.  Some expand their tastes. But most don't. 

I think it all goes back to my theory that men are like ducklings and imprint on what they jerked off to at 14.  Some expand their tastes. But most don't. 

I think it all goes back to my theory that men are like ducklings and imprint on what they jerked off to at 14.  Some expand their tastes. But most don't. 

I think it all goes back to my theory that men are like ducklings and imprint on what they jerked off to at 14.  Some expand their tastes. But most don't. 

The older men complaining now are more than likely guilty of the same offense when they were younger. Because if they had been less attractive they'd have been gettimg ignored all along and this wouldn't be such a surprise to them now. "A lot of men are visually stimulated, ageist, and shallow! And water is wet, news at 11."

As someone who waited too long and whose first experience was not paid, I think I'd have been better off going the provider route. To put it bluntly, people at the bars aren't looking for a project for the most part. I think it's better to get the monkey off your back and then decide if you want to get in the dating scene. I second the suggestion of starting with massage just to get used to being touched.

I have the experience of being middle aged and having been young but only moderately attractive so I know the vapidness(vapidity?) of twinks amd twunks is a timeless phenomenon and not some recent development. And it's not unique to gay people either. 

The older men complaining now are more than likely guilty of the same offense when they were younger. Because if they had been less attractive they'd have been gettimg ignored all along and this wouldn't be such a surprise to them now. "A lot of men are visually stimulated, ageist, and shallow! And water is wet, news at 11."

It is worth remembering that many gay men were raised at a time or in a culture in which homosexual activity was not merely disapproved but actually against the law, so being themselves and accepting their orientation was extremely dangerous. It is not easy to be self-accepting when one's natural identity is dangerous to one's very survival in the surroundings in which one is confined.

The older men complaining now are more than likely guilty of the same offense when they were younger. Because if they had been less attractive they'd have been gettimg ignored all along and this wouldn't be such a surprise to them now. "A lot of men are visually stimulated, ageist, and shallow! And water is wet, news at 11."

The older men complaining now are more than likely guilty of the same offense when they were younger. Because if they had been less attractive they'd have been gettimg ignored all along and this wouldn't be such a surprise to them now. "A lot of men are visually stimulated, ageist, and shallow! And water is wet, news at 11."

The older men complaining now are more than likely guilty of the same offense when they were younger. Because if they had been less attractive they'd have been gettimg ignored all along and this wouldn't be such a surprise to them now. "A lot of men are visually stimulated, ageist, and shallow! And water is wet, news at 11."

I think the view of same-sex activity was simply different in the past. They knew sometimes stuff happened but prior to AIDS and the explosion of STDs, the line between what was considered horseplay or "taking advantage" versus assault was in a different place because the known physical consequences were lesser. And they'd rather the boys get their rocks off together occasuonally than deal with a teen pregnancy.
So many older gay guys told me that just about ALL the boys they grew up with messed around a little with each other(even if it was just jerking off together or in front of each other), just never talked about it. But the straight guys my age I know well enough to talk openly with insist nothing ever happened when they were growing up and I believe them. 

I think the view of same-sex activity was simply different in the past. They knew sometimes stuff happened but prior to AIDS and the explosion of STDs, the line between what was considered horseplay or "taking advantage" versus assault was in a different place because the known physical consequences were lesser. And they'd rather the boys get their rocks off together occasuonally than deal with a teen pregnancy.
So many older gay guys told me that just about ALL the boys they grew up with messed around a little with each other(even if it was just jerking off together or in front of each other), just never talked about it. But the straight guys my age I know well enough to talk openly with insist nothing ever happened when they were growing up and I believe them. 

I think the view of same-sex activity was simply different in the past. They knew sometimes stuff happened but prior to AIDS and the explosion of STDs, the line between what was considered horseplay or "taking advantage" versus assault was in a different place because the known physical consequences were lesser. And they'd rather the boys get their rocks off together occasuonally than deal with a teen pregnancy.
So many older gay guys told me that just about ALL the boys they grew up with messed around a little with each other(even if it was just jerking off together or in front of each other), just never talked about it. But the straight guys my age I know well enough to talk openly with insist nothing ever happened when they were growing up and I believe them. 

Yes your first time ideally should be someone you care about blah blah blah but we're already past the point that's likely to happen even if he seeks it out and to be even blunter, the OP is at a stage where he doesn't know how many good physical years he has left. A decent fraction of men develop health issues in their 50s even if they DO live a healthy lifestyle. That aneurysm 20% of people have doesn't give a shit if you exercise and eat right. Do it while you can.
 
 

As someone who waited too long and whose first experience was not paid, I think I'd have been better off going the provider route. To put it bluntly, people at the bars aren't looking for a project for the most part. I think it's better to get the monkey off your back and then decide if you want to get in the dating scene. I second the suggestion of starting with massage just to get used to being touched.

Basically the 80s became a return to prudery, and not without some reason, because suddenly there was a deadly disease going around. Coupled with more awareness of sexual abuse, adults tried with mixed success to eliminate real and perceived opportunities for sexual activity to occur. Communal showers were a casualty of this effort. And once being naked in front of others was no longer something everyone just did, it became perceived as weird.