Simon Suraci

Same happened to me this week. RentMen (and RentMasseur, same company) suddenly stopped taking Visa card payments. No warning, nothing. They expired my ad because my recurring membership payment won’t process. It’s Mastercard, bitcoin, or tough luck. This move is mostly a money grab giving Mastercard exclusivity and RentMen/RentMasseur a discount on payment processing fees. The official story from the webmaster to me is they dropped Visa to comply with new regulatory requirements. Even if that’s true, it’s purely incidental. Yes, payment processors are running for the hills away from anything that looks like it enables or endorses criminal activity, but even legal things including fan site content and traditional porn. Just look at a lot of the updated terms and conditions over the past 6-12 months. You have to read the text. They don’t put it in the summaries and highlights emails. The moral police are coming down hard on this and related industries. I’m all for stopping human trafficking, but you can never eliminate the sex work trade by legislation, social norms or peer pressure. Wherever demand and supply exist, so does a market. I digress…maybe save that for related threads. Imagine how timely all this action is with the election coming up in 3 months…ok I’ll stop there before getting too political. We all know RM prioritizes their bottom line above everything else. They forced me to put pictures in my private gallery last month, for example. The pictures weren’t even nude, but they deemed them x-rated. It was simply to add content to a gallery that members would have to buy a membership to view. I send pics when requested, but it’s just a way for RM to squeeze more $ out of both clients escorts. Lame. The dropping Visa without warning debacle sent me into a tailspin because I don’t use MasterCard or bitcoin, or any other cryptocurrency. I’m on an extended road trip and some of the cities I’m visiting over the next few weeks are new to me…so no existing clients to rely on or reach out to. It’s purely advertising I have to go on to fill my books. I freaked out. I scrambled to a grocery store in Columbus yesterday in the little free time I had left to get a Mastercard gift card. RM will let me upload the card because it recognizes that it’s a Mastercard, but it still won’t process the payment, presumably because it’s a prepaid type. F*ck me. I managed this morning to apply for, and receive a new MasterCard with one of my financial institutions. Fortunately I got a digital card I can use until I receive the physical card in the mail. As of this morning, my RentMasseur and RentMen recurring payments are switched over to the new MC. Fingers crossed they don’t go exclusively to crypto without notice. Then I would really be screwed. Crypto is problematic in so many ways. Fine if RM wants to offer the option, but forcing us to use cryptocurrency would make me quit the platform tbh. This whole thing is exhausting.

Ari trained informally many years back under Newell, a masseur I work with in San Diego (ads are under MuscleGingerXL). I haven’t seen Ari myself, so take this with a grain of salt, but the consensus I’ve heard around town is you go to Ari for sensual work, not actual massage therapy. I would adjust your expectations accordingly. Others please do post any updates and mention of you have had better luck on the therapeutic side with him. We all evolve over time.

^ +1 I use the “Available Now” feature judiciously. Sometimes I have between 1-3 hours between clients which is not enough time to flag Available Now, have the client see it, reach out, confirm a booking, and then have the client travel to me, and complete the appointment, and maintain a 30 min gap between clients, all before my next client arrives. Sometimes yes this scenario happens to work out smoothly if all works perfectly within that timeframe where the client sees Available Now right when I flag, and not 55 mins after I flag. So…sometimes Available Now means available to respond to questions, make appointments (and to deal with constant client bs, but that’s another thread). Sometimes it means Available Now to start working asap if you contact me shortly after I flag it, but if you wait too long the window closes. Other times it means truly that I have nothing going on for several hours and I’m ready to work asap. Which means I’m not sitting around. I’m going to the gym or running an errand to make the most of my time when I’m not actively seeing clients. So maybe it takes me 30 mins or longer to complete my workout, shower, or drive back from a store or something. I think that’s pretty reasonable. There is no way to tell what’s happening with your provider at that particular time you text after seeing Available Now. There is only one flag for us to use…so we use it. You can’t get mad at us for using our free time in other ways than simply staring at our phones, unblinking, waiting for it to buzz after we flag Available Now. We have things to do. It’s impossible to guarantee that someone will be available immediately after you see the flag and text. You might have an initial delay from a guy who legitimately is available, but perhaps he is on the phone when you text, or in the middle of a task he can’t pause immediately, he’s in the shower, or what have you. It may take a short time before we see the text. Other times we see your message right away and respond. Client 1 sees Available Now, texts me, and books an appointment for some short time later, maybe 30 mins or an hour from the time they text. So far, the Available Now feature is working as intended. Sometimes only a few minutes later client 2 (who also saw Available Now flagged) texts requesting an appointment. I tell client 2 yes I can do X time later (in order to go after client 1 who is already on the way). That X time might be two hours or more later from the time client 2 is initially texting. Client 1 thinks I’m waiting around for him to show up whenever he goddamn feels like it, because after all, I am “Available Now”, indefinitely as far as he is concerned. So he shows up half an hour later than he said he would, which makes it that much more difficult for me to confidently set a time for client 2, so I pad half an hour to avoid potential conflict from client 1 taking his sweet time arriving late. Uncertainty around floating client arrival times is certainly part of the equation.

Poor baby…

I’ve had interest from clients inquiring about ASMR and related experiences, usually younger clients, but it’s so infrequent that I haven’t seen the point in offering ASMR as a service. To echo the above, it’s not a sexual service. That’s not really the point, but I suppose if you’re hell bent on making it sexual, you could.

A while back, one of my Dallas clients posted a negative reaction to a masseur he and I both really like. Once I shared that this masseur also creates fan site content, the client was grossed out and presumably doesn’t see that masseur any more. That’s unfortunate because that masseur really is a great guy and does good work. The puzzling thing about the client reaction is that the masseur and the client were not having sex, so I really don’t understand the relevance. I imagine this masseur had just as much sex privately before as he now does on camera - which begs the question: why should it matter? Does this information change how you think about your masseurs? Is it hot and exciting to you? Is it “icky” thinking about what he does outside his massage sessions with you, either privately or for an audience? Do you worry more about your sexual health? Do you think his level of risk is any different when he has sex off screen vs sex on screen? Does his notoriety appeal to you? I’ve considered creating content for a long time, but I’m just not ready to take on the time commitment, among other reservations. I’m wondering whether creating sexual content would have a positive or negative impact on my business. What do you guys think?

^refreshing

Don’t ask for a hookup outside the context of a paid session. It changes things, and almost never in ways that you like. If he asks YOU, fine. But don’t ask him to provide for free what he has been giving to you as a value added service.

I stayed in Louisville for a week this month and heard from clients there that the Louisville options are few, and not really worthwhile (their opinions). Some clients there rely exclusively on traveling masseurs.

Yes.

I’d be interested as well. It’s difficult finding FTM providers. Somewhat easier to find trans women, but trans men offering services are few and far between… I agree, travel definitely has to be a part of the equation, either flying to their city or flying them to yours. Unlikely you can find the right fit in a given city/region. Agree with reaching out to well known performers. But hey, expect to pay $$$.

Doesn’t look anything like Richard Simmons. And if he did, who cares? Someone will hire a guy that looks like Richard Simmons, and there’s nothing wrong or funny about it. Live and let live. This boy has a nice big booty. Love that hole!🕳️

Look, just on the other side of your fence!

Any provider worth his salt will see 65+ clients. I do. My oldest is in his 90s.

I use Booksy (ad in my signature). It has the same features Reyn mentioned and more, with an integrated card reader POS system. You can also accept payments on your phone through the app. Runs about $35 / month. Worth every penny and more. I don’t even use all of the features, mostly for client privacy reasons and general distaste for aggressive marketing. I don’t charge deposits or require a cc to book, and that’s an intentional business decision. You can set up features for no show protection, deposits, etc if you want.

^What you suggest is an unpaid service costing us a bit of our most valuable asset (time) which the client more than likely will never see, know about, or appreciate. Giving even more of our time away for free? Nope! We don’t want all our clients to be aware of such a platform in the first place. It’s not for clients. The platform is for providers. We only really spend time adding comments for extreme cases as a courtesy to other providers. We don’t spend additional time “reviewing” our everyday clients like you would a restaurant on Yelp. Besides, we are not the consumers anyway. ^Not the case at all. An experienced professional makes peace with the fact that anyone can be on the other side of their door. Yet he is ready to attend to his client’s needs anyway. A good provider does not have such anxiety. I know I don’t. We can’t control client behavior. Who is to say the client is as good with everyone as he was with me? It’s not our responsibility to build or maintain our clients’ reputations. If anything, the less we say, the better, so as not to jeopardize client discretion or give a false impression of safety. He didn’t murder me, so surely he won’t murder you, right?!

1) When I have neutral or positive experiences with a negatively reviewed client, I leave positive comments. Nothing that descriptive other than he is safe to see, followed through, and contradict any negative comments i.e. the “client paid my rate”, in contrast to comments like: “he didn’t pay”, “cheap client”, or “has no money”. I’ll mention he was respectful if he had other comments on his number saying he was rude, abrasive, or creepy. 2) After a positive meeting, I leave no comments when the client has nothing listed in the first place, which is most commonly the case. Same if he has only positive comments, which is very rare. Mr Number is not designed to be a referral system. It’s supposed to be for reporting spam and fraud. We providers use it unofficially as a warning beacon to flag chronic problem clients and help keep us safe. That’s why you hardly find any neutral or positive comments. It’s about managing risk, not a tool to find or refer better clients. The best clients have no comments on Mr Number because they are not behaving in a way that would motivate a provider to go out of his way to flag it. Really horrible clients might not have comments because they have either a) been lucky to not use providers who report on Mr Number, or b) regularly change their burner number for this express purpose - kind of like a provider making a new profile when he receives a bad review. Both behaviors are childish. Everyone treat one another with respect and we don’t have to play these games. Alas, bad apples populate both sides of hiring. Speaking for myself here, but I’m sure others feel the same: I don’t care if the client is attractive or nice or a millionaire, and this wouldn’t be the place to discern or share such information anyway. We just want to avoid trouble and wasting our time. Remember: an escort’s (and masseur’s) most valuable asset is his time. Here are some common Mr Number flags, which sometimes are true, sometimes not: Law enforcement (often not true) No-shower (usually true) Disrespect Verbal abuse Trolling behavior Bargaining behavior Won’t pay Drug use Mental instability No boundaries Wants to outsource all risk and responsibility for his own sexual health to escorts i.e. show me your prescription, rapid test in person, etc. There is no satisfying this unreasonable client, even if you test in person, send all documents, etc. It never ends. Immediate block. “Gross” clients (inexperienced providers write these, very common, it’s unprofessional) “Time Waster” - see blurb below. Less common: Violence Catfishing Other ”Time Waster” and variants therof: This is the most common comment of all. Most of these are from immature providers. They have no concept of what reasonably constitutes time wasting behavior. Just today I saw a comment saying a client was a time waster because he canceled last minute in 2022…because he tested positive for COVID. Now, we don’t know if that was a lame made up excuse (I hear them all), but anyone sick should cancel! Just like a provider testing positive for an STI should cancel, however inconvenient that may be for each party. Car accidents, sick relatives, and business emergencies tend to occur conveniently right before so many appointments. After a while you catch on. But sometimes that really is what happened. While unfortunate, canceling for real, compelling reasons is a normal, natural part of life. You can’t be considered a “time waster” because you are a human being with a life. At the same time, reporting these incidents shows us patterns. Like, how many times does this John get COVID before an appointment, or “fall asleep” and stop responding (unacceptable btw). Maybe he really does care for a sick relative needing constant care…in which case he should get coverage with another caregiver before booking an appointment. Your lack of planning does not make everyday occurrences “emergencies”, where you have to cancel every other time you book. Figure your shit out. Be an adult. Get a sitter. Or just…don’t book! We see the patterns and measure our risk. On the flip side, lots of clients do waste our time in ways they shouldn’t. Answering questions about our rates and services is not timewasting behavior. Not booking but asking the same questions over and over is. These too: Client sexting Client demanding affirmation Discussing minutiae of an appointment obviously for wanking purposes Demanding our attention at all hours outside appointment times, over many days, weeks, or even months. I have to block clients who feel entitled to hours of my attention because they got a one hour massage from me one time. Thanks, but no thanks.

I agree cowboy position (on top) is good for getting going, even for experienced bottoms. I prefer this myself when I bottom and need to ease in at first. However, the bottom needs to feel comfortable and confident in what he is doing. First timers often aren’t, which can lend itself to unnecessary anxiety, pressure, and uncertainty having to control all the action without really knowing what works best for himself yet. Everyone is different. I enjoy popping a man’s cherry missionary style because I know what I’m doing and he doesn’t have to fret about anything. He doesn’t have to do anything, really. We pace ourselves according to his comfort, and take breaks when necessary. I respond to his body and verbal cues and take it from there. Being face to face helps build and sustain the connection, which is equally if no moreso brain-to-brain than it is dick-to-ass. As others have mentioned, the warm up and foreplay are very important. It makes all the difference. Do not rush this part. Rimming does wonders to relax a bottom and prepare him for unbridled pleasure. Kissing, cuddling, oral, other erogenous zones play. Whatever tickles your fancy. Solo play with small toys helps a lot, and you can never use too much lube during the main event with the real thing. Patience and experience go a long way. Selecting the right provider makes all the difference in this regard.

It’s a boon, but you have to be located conveniently to the attendees’ accommodations. In Dallas, I was in downtown close to most of the big conventions and trade show venues. I frequently got trade show visitor business, especially because I was the only provider in the downtown area. The rest were in Oak Lawn or areas further away. Some of these clients would walk or take Uber in a number of minutes you can count on one hand.

I do this all the time for my regulars. I’m typically the madam arranging everything and collecting the $ from the client and paying the other guy(s) separately. I don’t charge anything extra or discount, I do this as a value added proposition for the client.

This is definitely a thing. Here’s one company local to where I am staying in Kentucky. Cleaning Entertainment, Inc. | Cleaning Entertainment, Inc. CLEANINGENTERTAINMENT.COM Some of their add-on services:

^THIS 💯

I block for several reasons. Here are just a few I can think of off the top of my head: 1. Repeatedly inquiring but never booking, sometimes over periods of years. Often with a lot of chatter that I patiently respond to every time. At some point, dealing with the client over and over has cost me more in time than it’s worth for me to collect in fee for an actual meeting, so I cut it off to quit my losses. 2. Client texts gibberish or something that looks like it will be so difficult to communicate with him that it’s not worth my time or energy to deal with it. See example below from tonight. 3. Client clearly only wants my time and attention for fantasy purposes but is not serious about booking me. Sometimes it’s obvious in a few texts or few minutes. Other times they string me along for hours or days with lots of time gaps in between messages. 4. Repeatedly asks the same questions, like I literally copy and paste my previous response or say “see response above”. Happens many, many times before I block. 5. Harassment, verbal abuse, personal attacks, threats of violence, and the like. People commenting on my body, looks or something about me they don’t like. Basically troll behavior. I suspect some of those are actually from right here on CoM. 6. Mr. Number reveals some egregious behavior from a problem client. I give 95% the benefit of the doubt, but proceed with caution. Once in a while comments are so consistent over such a long time (for example, many no-shows over two years), that I just don’t want to waste my time bothering with the client at all. 7. Penpals. Like a client books me for a one hour massage one time in a faraway city, and now feels it’s his right to insert himself into my life all the time by sending messages. I’m patient and polite, far beyond what I should be. I set boundaries with them. When they continue to ignore my boundaries, I block. 8. Scams. So many scams. On the daily. 9. Client indicates he is sexually interested in, or actually has sex with minors or non-consenting adults. Please don’t do this. It makes me have to report that stuff to the authorities and it puts me in a horrible position. 10. Stalker behavior, unhinged behavior. Like the client who I keep saying no to and eventually block but he tracks me down on Facebook and other socials to keep asking again and again, and uses manipulation tactics. He hired me for sex once and then expected me to go on dates with him for free and got upset when I didn’t and called me rude when I explained what the boundaries were. He kept at it for months with the same cycle. Eventually, just…block. He deleted his A4A profile and created a new one to try to talk to me again but I figured it out quickly, and so the saga continues on every platform to this day. I don’t engage with him anymore. Just block! 10. More will come to me… Wtf? After these six messages, I blocked: This one below really pissed me off. The first time he has a mysterious car accident before his appointment but texts to say he can’t make it. I’m forgoing my Father’s Day plans to make time for his second appointment and the client is having me cross dress (mutual CD situation, wants me to top… don’t ask). This next bit made me want to block him on the spot, but he apologized later. I’m at my door in lipstick, heels, and other attire (which he paid a deposit for), and he pulls this: None of the following are reasons for me to block: 1. Client is generally annoying. 2. Client looks, age, body type, race, ability, political affiliation, religion, class, gender identity, sexual orientation, relationship status. 3. Client likes to keep in touch, but maintains some boundaries. 4. Client asks for rates or other relevant information, no matter how rudely or politely they ask. Sometimes the info is on the particular platform they are viewing, sometimes not. I still answer anyway.

I feel it’s only right for him to return the deposit. At the same time, it’s best to confirm any particular items that are important to you before you book and send a deposit. And yet, you shouldn’t have to confirm everything he lists on his profile either. Bad on him for throwing in the kitchen sink on his profile and then not delivering.

I traded massages with Tal a while ago. He did a good job. Sexy man too. He has a steam sauna in his place. He told me he was moving to a new studio space soon.