Roommate moving. Should I feel something?

[gallahadesquire]

My roommate of the past 4+ years is moving out. She [see below] has found the love of her life, and is moving to Wisconsin.

 

I met him as an escort, and knew his life would turn to shit ... and it did. I had offered him a place to stay, you know, for a "while" while he got his life together. I was thinking a couple of months, as someone did for me, at a difficult point in my life.

 

Since then he's become a massage therapist; gotten his BA in English Literature; and has been out of work for three months. Oh, and transitioned from Male to Female.

 

I kinda wonder if I should be feeling something. We've gone through one cat, and are on Cat #2, which I'm keeping (and he's been mine all along; Cat's choice). He's been here for two months of my being in hospital. Admittedly, it's been nice having someone around the house ... the occasional meal, having the garbage taken out weekly ... and lost my Handicap parking sticker in the process ... along with at least one towing due to hitting something while driving. He does have a bit of a habit of what he touches turns to shit.

 

I'll miss her. I think. But I'm not really sad. Not relieved, either. I've lost too many friends in my life to be that effected by another one going.

 

Simultaneously, a Straight fellow I know is leaving for Australia. Another gay friend is moving to Philadelphia to get his life together (his parents are there). I've met a guy and have dinner with him occasionally, and have no idea if there will ever be sex involved.

 

Am I just getting old? Is it time for pack up and leave, myself? And what about Naomi (not to mention The Cat).

 

Any suggestions would be appreciated.

[+ Funguy]

How about therapy?

[+ tassojunior]

getting laid best therapy ever.

[gallahadesquire]

How about therapy?

I've done enough of that to last a lifetime. Seriously. I'm a CBT [not cock-n-ball torture] kinda guy. Thought about it ... don't see that it would help.

[gallahadesquire]

getting laid best therapy ever.

 

I was on a weeks vacation with someone, getting it almost every night. When I got home, this was dropped.

 

ADDENDUM: She told me that she thought it would happen, once she met her girlfriend, so it's not a surprise. And that may be the brunt of it: I've had time to think and adjust.

[LaffingBear]

How about:

 

There are no mandatory feelings. Feel what you feel, or not, and accept it.

 

What's the alternative? Force yourself to feel something because you feel that you should/need to feel something?

 

They're your feelings, not an exercise at the high school for performing arts. Trying to feel what you don't feel naturally will only leave you with the feeling that the bullshit is absurd.

[+ nycman]

Sometimes you feel “nothing”.

 

Sometimes the emotions come later.

 

Sometimes they don’t.

 

Breath, and be...that’s all you can do.

[Reluctant Daddy]

Feel what comes naturally. Happiness, sadness, relief. And if she was important to you for that period of your life, let her know.

[+ Gar1eth]

My roommate of the past 4+ years is moving out. She [see below] has found the love of her life, and is moving to Wisconsin.

 

I met him as an escort, and knew his life would turn to shit ... and it did. I had offered him a place to stay, you know, for a "while" while he got his life together. I was thinking a couple of months, as someone did for me, at a difficult point in my life.

 

Since then he's become a massage therapist; gotten his BA in English Literature; and has been out of work for three months. Oh, and transitioned from Male to Female.

 

I kinda wonder if I should be feeling something. We've gone through one cat, and are on Cat #2, which I'm keeping (and he's been mine all along; Cat's choice). He's been here for two months of my being in hospital. Admittedly, it's been nice having someone around the house ... the occasional meal, having the garbage taken out weekly ... and lost my Handicap parking sticker in the process ... along with at least one towing due to hitting something while driving. He does have a bit of a habit of what he touches turns to shit.

 

I'll miss her. I think. But I'm not really sad. Not relieved, either. I've lost too many friends in my life to be that effected by another one going.

 

Simultaneously, a Straight fellow I know is leaving for Australia. Another gay friend is moving to Philadelphia to get his life together (his parents are there). I've met a guy and have dinner with him occasionally, and have no idea if there will ever be sex involved.

 

Am I just getting old? Is it time for pack up and leave, myself? And what about Naomi (not to mention The Cat).

 

Any suggestions would be appreciated.

 

 

First off, you were incredibly kind to offer your home. It sounds like it wasn’t all peaches and cream-but that it wasn’t horrible.

 

I think sometimes you don’t know how you feel until after events occur.

 

Gman

[+ Avalon]

You've used both male and female pronouns. What gender is the roommate?

[BigK]

He's transitioning to She

[BabyBoomer]

 

Any suggestions would be appreciated.

 

Spend a weekend with MG.

 

~Boomer~

[Deadlift1]

I'll miss her. I think. But I'm not really sad. Not relieved, either. I've lost too many friends in my life to be that effected by another one going.

affected :]

[gallahadesquire]

Spend a weekend with MG.

 

~Boomer~

I can't PM you.

[BabyBoomer]

I can't PM you.

 

You should be able to, I have no one blocked. I'll PM you.

 

~Boomer~

[+ Gar1eth]

Spend a weekend with MG.

 

~Boomer~

 

I miss seeing Mike Gaite. I hope he is doing well.

 

Gman

[BabyBoomer]

I miss seeing Mike Gaite. I hope he is doing well.

 

Gman

 

I'm sure he is. He keeps a very low profile around here these days. He seems to only post his travel schedule.

 

~Boomer~

[+ Gar1eth]

I miss seeing Mike Gaite. I hope he is doing well.

 

Gman

 

I'm sure he is. He keeps a very low profile around here these days. He seems to only post his travel schedule.

 

~Boomer~

 

 

Gman

[Rudynate]

My roommate of the past 4+ years is moving out. She [see below] has found the love of her life, and is moving to Wisconsin.

 

I met him as an escort, and knew his life would turn to shit ... and it did. I had offered him a place to stay, you know, for a "while" while he got his life together. I was thinking a couple of months, as someone did for me, at a difficult point in my life.

 

Since then he's become a massage therapist; gotten his BA in English Literature; and has been out of work for three months. Oh, and transitioned from Male to Female.

 

I kinda wonder if I should be feeling something. We've gone through one cat, and are on Cat #2, which I'm keeping (and he's been mine all along; Cat's choice). He's been here for two months of my being in hospital. Admittedly, it's been nice having someone around the house ... the occasional meal, having the garbage taken out weekly ... and lost my Handicap parking sticker in the process ... along with at least one towing due to hitting something while driving. He does have a bit of a habit of what he touches turns to shit.

 

I'll miss her. I think. But I'm not really sad. Not relieved, either. I've lost too many friends in my life to be that effected by another one going.

 

Simultaneously, a Straight fellow I know is leaving for Australia. Another gay friend is moving to Philadelphia to get his life together (his parents are there). I've met a guy and have dinner with him occasionally, and have no idea if there will ever be sex involved.

 

Am I just getting old? Is it time for pack up and leave, myself? And what about Naomi (not to mention The Cat).

 

Any suggestions would be appreciated.

 

 

Get out more.

[MikeBiDude]

He's transitioning to She

Read his whole post

[Kippy]

Put her on your Christmas card list--end of story. I've had many good friends who were roommates at one time or another and we've moved on and ultimately drifted apart over the years. Not a thing to feel guilty about!

 

Kipp

[MiamiLooker]

...once she met her girlfriend...

When she was a he, was he attracted to women? What will you do if her new relationship doesn't work out, and she contacts you asking for your help (money, rent-free housing, etc)?

[Walker1]

Do you want to feel something?

[+ Avalon]

He's transitioning to She

 

Thank-you

[bigvalboy]

Living alone can sometimes be the best therapy.