How do you handle "let's discuss in person" escorts

[InterestingGuy]

I've noticed an annoying trend in some escort ads.

 

The ads read something like this:

 

"Please text me to set up an appointment. Please do not mention anything sexual. My fee is for my time only. We can discuss the details and specifics in person when we meet."

 

What would do if you'd like to pursue this escort?

[AdamSmith]

Move on.

[+ Keith30309]

Move on.

 

+1

 

Assuming there are no reviews or other experiential information I think it would likely not go well.

[+ poolboy48220]

I just took the plunge with a guy who texted that, but accompanied it with a wink. I wasn't disappointed in the session.

[Nvr2thick4me]

This scenario has not gone well for me - your results may vary.

[jawjateck]

That language is a turn off and a warning sign of approaching incompatibility.

[MscleLovr]

I can only suggest a two-pronged approach:

1. Say something along the lines of "I only play with muscle-bottoms" or "I enjoy getting oral to completion" or whatever your passion is.

Then ask "Are we compatible?"

2. If he refuses to answer Yes or No, take AdamSmith's advice and move on.

If he reassures you as to compatibility, invite him to meet for a drink in a discreet public place prior to your date. Then you may both be specific as to how your wishes and his services will coincide.

[AdamSmith]

I just took the plunge with a guy who texted that, but accompanied it with a wink. I wasn't disappointed in the session.

Wholly agree. My hard-assed response above does not reflect how I in fact usually cut the guy great slack, and am happy to take a chance if he looks and seems worth the chance.

[+ Keith30309]

For me to go to the effort of setting up a public vetting meeting with someone who was privately noncommittal there would need to be something truly extraordinary and compelling about him. That something would almost certainly have to be something that he refuses to talk about in the first place.

 

 

It's possible that a shy, skittish lamb online could turn into a tiger face to face but I'd not be willing to expend the effort to find out.

 

There's a reason that Deli cooler counters are transparently.

[bigvalboy]

Meet-N-Greet at a local Starbucks for coffee and a quick chat. 10 mins is all you need. It will either be thumbs up or down.

[bostonman]

A related question. When escort ads feature those "legal" statements ("money is for time only" etc), do they ever really work in a legal situation? Could an escort (or client) really ever get away with a defense that the ad clearly states that this isn't about sex for pay? I've always doubted the legality of such statements - would that really prevent an arrest, etc, or would the cops just say "yeah, right, tell it to the judge"?

 

And if such statements are just empty words that would have no legal ground (as I suspect), why do escorts put them in their ads?

[Kevin Slater]

A related question. When escort ads feature those "legal" statements ("money is for time only" etc), do they ever really work in a legal situation? Could an escort (or client) really ever get away with a defense that the ad clearly states that this isn't about sex for pay? I've always doubted the legality of such statements - would that really prevent an arrest, etc, or would the cops just say "yeah, right, tell it to the judge"?

 

And if such statements are just empty words that would have no legal ground (as I suspect), why do escorts put them in their ads?

 

I hate those statements. They're off-putting and of absolutely no value. Worse, they imply a level of protection that simply is not there. (See DHS v Rentboy, et al.)

 

Kevin Slater

[MikeyGMin]

+1

 

Assuming there are no reviews or other experiential information I think it would likely not go well.

 

I agree. There are just too many ways to have a very discreet exchange and reach an understanding. I'm seeing a new guy later today (brand new and no reviews.) His review is clear that he provides a BFE and I pointed him to my Rentmen profile for my stats and likes. He came back with, "It looks like we're a great match" and the deal was sealed. All without ever putting anything indiscreet in writing.

[Rudynate]

One of the things I look for in an escort is being easy to book with. I want to set it up with a couple of texts or emails and a short phone call.

 

A meet-and-greet doesn't fit my idea of being easy to book with.

[liubit]

I hate those statements. They're off-putting and of absolutely no value. Worse, they imply a level of protection that simply is not there. (See DHS v Rentboy, et al.)

I agree with Kevin. Those statements have the same value as the ones people post forbidding Facebook to use their pics and information

[sexymonk]

The boys have right to defend themselves and not discuss which is not according to federal or state law! See from the position of the advertisers. Due to law and enforce people problem they don't want to discuss anything not in accordance with law!

[Juan Vancouver]

I am one of those who are more than happy to establish general compatibility, but if pressed with a "But will you fuck me for three hours non-stop and come three times?" I clarify that I charge only for my time. Nothing else is bought, negotiated or expected.

 

This is not a naive plot to keep law enforcement away, it's just a clear way to say that I am human being, that many factors enter the equation, that I will not promise, sell or negotiate sex acts or bodily fluids because the kind of service I provide is an organic, human, non-machinistic, intimate service. If my prospective client is looking for someone to piston for three hours and cum three times on cue as negotiated, then I urge him to look for a better match.

 

Of course, more often than not, when the prospective client books the session with me, honouring my human nature and my personal boundaries, it turns out that we can have an incredibly satisfying interaction.

 

But that's just the way I do it. There's many others.

[bostonman]

I am one of those who are more than happy to establish general compatibility, but if pressed with a "But will you fuck me for three hours non-stop and come three times?" I clarify that I charge only for my time. Nothing else is bought, negotiated or expected.

 

This is not a naive plot to keep law enforcement away, it's just a clear way to say that I am human being, that many factors enter the equation, that I will not promise, sell or negotiate sex acts or bodily fluids because the kind of service I provide is an organic, human, non-machinistic, intimate service. If my prospective client is looking for someone to piston for three hours and cum three times on cue as negotiated, then I urge him to look for a better match.

 

Of course, more often than not, when the prospective client books the session with me, honouring my human nature and my personal boundaries, it turns out that we can have an incredibly satisfying interaction.

 

But that's just the way I do it. There's many others.

 

I agree with your way of thinking. It's about mutual respect. And it should always be.

 

But I do assume that some escorts (probably especially newbies) do think that by claiming it's all for "time only" that they're getting around some legal loophole. And I'm not surprised to hear some others in this thread claiming that such a loophole is nonsense. That's what I thought.

[sexymonk]

I am one of those who are more than happy to establish general compatibility, but if pressed with a "But will you fuck me for three hours non-stop and come three times?" I clarify that I charge only for my time. Nothing else is bought, negotiated or expected.

 

This is not a naive plot to keep law enforcement away, it's just a clear way to say that I am human being, that many factors enter the equation, that I will not promise, sell or negotiate sex acts or bodily fluids because the kind of service I provide is an organic, human, non-machinistic, intimate service. If my prospective client is looking for someone to piston for three hours and cum three times on cue as negotiated, then I urge him to look for a better match.

 

Of course, more often than not, when the prospective client books the session with me, honouring my human nature and my personal boundaries, it turns out that we can have an incredibly satisfying interaction.

 

But that's just the way I do it. There's many others.

Not to mention that clients shouldn't think that money can buy chemistry and compatibility as guys on RM are human at last. However what is important is the interaction, behavior and mutual respect!

[Wiley1]

I've noticed an annoying trend in some escort ads.

 

The ads read something like this:

 

"Please text me to set up an appointment. Please do not mention anything sexual. My fee is for my time only. We can discuss the details and specifics in person when we meet."

 

What would do if you'd like to pursue this escort?

Block his profile

[MiamiLooker]

I can only suggest a two-pronged approach:

1. Say something along the lines of "I only play with muscle-bottoms" or "I enjoy getting oral to completion" or whatever your passion is.

Then ask "Are we compatible?"

2. If he refuses to answer Yes or No, take AdamSmith's advice and move on.

If he reassures you as to compatibility, invite him to meet for a drink in a discreet public place prior to your date. Then you may both be specific as to how your wishes and his services will coincide.

This, or some similar approach, has usually worked well for me.

[caliguy]

I dunno but in places like LA the probability for getting arrested for it is very remote. Can't say the same for say Orange County or anywhere outside of it. There it might be a very smart move.

[+ VeryHappyCustomer]

The ads read something like this:

 

"Please text me to set up an appointment. Please do not mention anything sexual. My fee is for my time only. We can discuss the details and specifics in person when we meet."

 

What would do if you'd like to pursue this escort?

 

I text my stats, location, when I want to meet, and "please let me know if that works for you". His caution is understandable; and also I think it's rude to send explicit texts to strangers.

 

But elaborate legalese raises concerns about his state of mind. If he's anxious or touchy that will spoil my experience.

[Kyle Clinton]

I am one of those who are more than happy to establish general compatibility, but if pressed with a "But will you fuck me for three hours non-stop and come three times?" I clarify that I charge only for my time. Nothing else is bought, negotiated or expected.

 

This is not a naive plot to keep law enforcement away, it's just a clear way to say that I am human being, that many factors enter the equation, that I will not promise, sell or negotiate sex acts or bodily fluids because the kind of service I provide is an organic, human, non-machinistic, intimate service. If my prospective client is looking for someone to piston for three hours and cum three times on cue as negotiated, then I urge him to look for a better match.

 

Of course, more often than not, when the prospective client books the session with me, honouring my human nature and my personal boundaries, it turns out that we can have an incredibly satisfying interaction.

 

But that's just the way I do it. There's many others.

Juan is a beautiful man in all ways. Personal experience. He's a joy to be with and in the presence of.

[gentlewick]

I discuss nothing and get right to the point in an email or text and give a specific time and date for a meeting (or a range since I book in advance). If they ask I will mention my preferences as to what I like doing and they'll tell me if they're cool with it. The first session with a new guy is an experiment, if it works I will schedule them again and will tell them more about what I like. If I had specific fetishes that had to be fulfilled at every encounter then I might not be so easygoing. I'm pretty good with just the basics though.