After the ball is over.......

[Lankypeters]

What has your experience been when an escort you've engaged later passes you on the street? In my experience -- and I'm talking about maybe three occasions -- the escort has looked straight ahead without the slightest recognition. In one case this became amusing because I would later hire the guy and then again pass him on the street without a glance. I understand the working guys respect anonymity. But in all the encounters I recall I was walking alone and would have said hello and possibly even chatted. And maybe more, if they turned me on!

[bigvalboy]

What has your experience been when an escort you've engaged later passes you on the street? In my experience -- and I'm talking about maybe three occasions -- the escort has looked straight ahead without the slightest recognition. In one case this became amusing because I would later hire the guy and then again pass him on the street without a glance. I understand the working guys respect anonymity. But in all the encounters I recall I was walking alone and would have said hello and possibly even chatted. And maybe more, if they turned me on!

 

Only happened to me once. I was in WEHO having lunch at a side walk café, on a glorious SoCal day. I was in such a good mood recounting my life and being so grateful for so many things, when down the street comes this 'tall drink of water' walking two dogs. I began starring and knew I recognized him, but couldn't remember from where. He saw me looking, slowed his pace, and as he passed my table, without so much as a smile said, "Yes it's me" and then just kept walking. I turned and watched him proceed down the street, and in that instant I felt very sorry for him, that he was the kind of person who lacked even the slightest morsel of common courteous, and was grateful that I had only hired him once. Another sip of my chardonnay and he was nothing more than a fading memory.

 

I too understand the need for anonymity, but a simple smile or nod of recognition could hardly hurt, and can go a long way. In my book, It's the little things that we do to one another, that people remember most.

[Lankypeters]

Nice vignette, and rather poignant. He seems not to have much liked himself.

[+ Charlie]

I once hired a guy through an agency. He came to my home--something I rarely did--and we had a great time, spending much more time just talking than having sex (he even called the agency and said he was done and was going home to bed, but instead stayed with me for another hour, no charge). A few days later I ran into him on a street corner and gave him a cheery greeting. He looked startled and scuttled away as quickly as possible. The next time I called the agency, they said he no longer worked for them, and I never saw him again anywhere.

[Steven_Draker]

In my experience -- and I'm talking about maybe three occasions -- the escort has looked straight ahead without the slightest recognition.

 

Without being "in the head" of the guy you hired, it's hard to guess what transpired, Lanky.

 

Probably, he didn't remember you/recognized your face, or simply wasn't focused on the passing people. Either way, I wouldn't take it too personally.

 

I'm glad to stop, say hello and chat only if the client makes eye contact first and there's an "invitation". Without eye contact from the client, I wouldn't interfere and disturb his privacy (especially if he (or me) are not alone or there are people around)

 

Finally, many closeted clients hire out-of-town escorts because they don't risk to bump into them on the street.

[Lankypeters]

That's the kind of discreet, courteous and professional response I would expect from you, Steven.

 

I didn't really take the guy's "overlook" personally. It did make me wonder if he liked his work.

 

Thinking about this brought to mind another encounter. Waiting on the corner for the light to change, I spotted a very popular Gotham escort I'd seen several times. He walked right by, staring straight ahead, even though I'd looked in his direction. During the two or three times I saw him after that he went on about some form of "dyslexia" he had that caused him to "walk right by people I know on the street and never even see them." There are special glasses for that.

[Guest countryboywny]

I have had this happen a few times, where I see an escort that I've hired in a public place. I do the same thing every time, I walk by as if I had no idea who he was. I am respecting his privacy as well as my own. You never know if he's with another client or what the situation is. One time I saw an escort known to me at a crowded bar. I walked right past him as if I didn't know him and I immediately got a smack on the ass. We shared a good laugh and chatted, but he totally understood my walking by and appreciated it.

[Mark Gordon]

During the two or three times I saw him after that he went on about some form of "dyslexia" he had that caused him to "walk right by people I know on the street and never even see them." There are special glasses for that.

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prosopagnosia

[Lankypeters]

He may well suffer from this affliction. But I have to wonder why, after I'd seen him on the street, he pointedly brought this up every time I engaged him thereafter. Perhaps he saw me, but didn't really see me.

[adriano46]

Only a few times have I ever actually come across on the street or in a very public context a guy hired privately. In each case, I was not in a position to greet or even acknowledge them, and I am grateful that none tried to approach me.

 

I agree with Steven above that, once the recognition is made, "if" the client wishes to engage the guy in a greeting or conversation, there should be some appropriate and discreet eye contact (however that is done??), and that the client too should respect the position of the escort that perhaps he does not wan to be recognized at that moment. It is very much a two-way street.

[seeker630]

Only a few times have I ever actually come across on the street or in a very public context a guy hired privately. In each case, I was not in a position to greet or even acknowledge them, and I am grateful that none tried to approach me.

 

I agree with Steven above that, once the recognition is made, "if" the client wishes to engage the guy in a greeting or conversation, there should be some appropriate and discreet eye contact (however that is done??), and that the client too should respect the position of the escort that perhaps he does not wan to be recognized at that moment. It is very much a two-way street.

 

+1

[+ Cock Eyed Optimist]

Interesting. This just happened to me the other night. I was with an escort whom I see once a month. We were walking down the sidewalk in Boystown, Chicago and we ran into an escort in Chicago whom I see every few months. We both said "hello" and I introduced him to my "date". We chatted for a bit and the three of us went into Elixir (my fave bar) and had a few drinks together. Why not be civil?

[tom1980]

I once saw an escort I'd engaged a few times at the grocery store. I was there with my wife and two of my children, and the escort and the friend he was with passed us in an aisle with no greeting or sign of recognition. He moved away from Dallas shortly after that, and I haven't seen him again. I was thankful that he was either discreet or did not recognize me. I've also walked past escorts I've hired on the street a couple of times without either of us speaking or looking directly at the other.

 

I've only had an escort speak to me when I saw him in public on one occasion. I was walking from a hotel elevator to the exit (after leaving an appointment with another escort), and he came into the lobby from outside. I saw him first and did not engage, but when he saw me he waived to get my attention. I paused very briefly and told him I had just been visiting a friend and was not staying at the hotel. He took a moment to process what I had said, realized he wasn't there for me, said he was running late to meet a client, and excused himself. After that experience, I started limiting the number of guys I hire who live in the Dallas/Fort Worth area. Now I only hire a few guys who live here, each of whom I've hired several times. Other than those select few, I only hire guys who are traveling through town or when I am traveling.

[Epigonos]

Happened to me only once. I ran into an escort who I knew VERY well in the underground parking lot of a theatre complex in Hollywood. We recognized each other instantly. We had always met at my home because he, being an actor, didn't want to be recognized having dinner with an older man in a public restaurant. He looked startled, I simply nodded and smiled, and he in return nodded and smiled and looked instantly relived. The next time he was at my place for dinner and sex he thanked me for my reaction and we had a good laugh together. He has since retired and damn do I miss him.

[+ sam.fitzpatrick]

I've never passed an escort I have previously hired in public; however, I was traveling on business and had scheduled an appointment with an escort for my second night in town. I had not previously hired this guy.

 

I had a connecting flight through Dallas, and wouldn't you know it, the escort I was going to meet the next day was at the service desk trying to find a flight to the destination city after missing his connection home. I did ask him if it was him the next night and he confirmed. He said I should have come over an say "hi."

[Decatur Guy]

It's only happened to me once. We ran into each other at a park and had a nice chat.

[+ VeryHappyCustomer]

Two of my regulars shop at the Whole Foods near my office. We all seem to be on the same schedule (not a coincidence, since scheduling is critical for me) and we've passed in the aisles several times. One of them is discreet, and will smile but avoid eye contact. The other always stops to chat if I'm alone. I find this endearing and genuine, and it has made me appreciate him all the more.

 

I once ran into a former masseur at his "legit" job at J Crew. He was terrified, so I quickly left without saying a word. It still pains me to remember how unhappy he was.

[Lankypeters]

That's too bad. A simple chat is harmless. This kind of response isn't limited to working boys. Back in my days of casual sex -- which often consisted of street cruising and quick pick ups -- if I met guys I'd tricked with, they's often look straight ahead. Sometimes this happened on the very same day we'd gotten it off. I think there's a lot of guilt involved here.

[rvwnsd]

What has your experience been when an escort you've engaged later passes you on the street? In my experience -- and I'm talking about maybe three occasions -- the escort has looked straight ahead without the slightest recognition. In one case this became amusing because I would later hire the guy and then again pass him on the street without a glance. I understand the working guys respect anonymity. But in all the encounters I recall I was walking alone and would have said hello and possibly even chatted. And maybe more, if they turned me on!

 

There are two ways to address this. 1) Ask the guys you hire how to handle a potential meeting in a public place. 2) Understand that he doesn't know how you would react to being acknowledged in public and you don't know his situation and accept that he is being cautious.

 

In terms of my experience, I have asked guys whether I should acknowledge them in public. Some have said yes, others have said only when we are both alone, and others prefer that I not talk to them. I respect their wishes, as I expect them to respect any boundaries that I might set.

[ErieBear]

One thing, for me, I tend to be very focused on where I'm at. I had a friend from church call me one day at work. I had known her for 15 years. However, I still asked "Diane who?" Simply because I was in work mode. If they do not automatically recognize you or acknowledge you, it may just be that they're focused on something else. Or someone else, lol

[+ FreshFluff]

I too understand the need for anonymity, but a simple smile or nod of recognition could hardly hurt, and can go a long way.

 

An escort may be afraid that this could invite the kind of contact (conversation, a hug), that he may want to avoid in public. But if I were in your place, BVB, I'd feel a little sad too.

[Newly]

How sad. I understand that some people need to be careful, others want to keep this part of their lives totally away from their real lives or they need to protect their jobs or family. I get that. Just speaking for myself if an escort I had known (and there aren't many which may explain why I am so naive) walked by me without acknowledging me I would be crushed. These people have been a real part of my life, they're important and not just a thing. Of course I guess if I keep doing this I'll start to see it very differently. I hope I never get there, I'd rather be naive and stupid. Sorry if this sounds judgmental or Pollyanna I don't mean it that way, I would embarrass the escort because I'd probably run to them and give them a big hug...so consider this as fair warning.

[Tighty]

How sad. I understand that some people need to be careful, others want to keep this part of their lives totally away from their real lives or they need to protect their jobs or family. I get that. Just speaking for myself if an escort I had known (and there aren't many which may explain why I am so naive) walked by me without acknowledging me I would be crushed. These people have been a real part of my life, they're important and not just a thing. Of course I guess if I keep doing this I'll start to see it very differently. I hope I never get there, I'd rather be naive and stupid. Sorry if this sounds judgmental or Pollyanna I don't mean it that way, I would embarrass the escort because I'd probably run to them and give them a big hug...so consider this as fair warning.

 

newtothis hugs J Crew employee

coworker asks J Crew employee: "Why did that guy hug you?"

J Crew employee: "..."

[Newly]

newtothis hugs J Crew employee

coworker asks J Crew employee: "Why did that guy hug you?"

J Crew employee: "..."

 

You're absolutely right, that was dumb of me. Its just that I come from a culture where people hug each other all the time (including guys) and live in a pretty liberal town where I don't think people really care too much about stuff like this. Based on J Crews I've been in I think a few more hugs between staff and visitors could only help. Just kidding!

[bigvalboy]

An escort may be afraid that this could invite the kind of contact (conversation, a hug), that he may want to avoid in public. But if I were in your place, BVB, I'd feel a little sad too.

 

Oh I completely agree. My comment was directed toward those escorts or clients that just have that arrogance about them when they are in public. You tend to see more of it in WEHO...strictly my opinion of course...lol