Bullied Bus Monitor

[wayout]

I am sure everyone has probably heard about or seen the video of a bus monitor being verbally abused/bullied by a bunch of students on a school bus. If you haven't seen it here is a link to the disturbing video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sBhAxofUAZY

 

The school district has given their ruling and suspended the students for a year (they will have outside academic tutoring), will be required to complete 50hrs of community service with senior citizens and will receive formal behavioral training (http://news.yahoo.com/students-viciously-bullied-bus-monitor-suspended-022634219.html;_ylt=AppmhNOX66gAdfiFEFm7U0rzWed_;_ylu=X3oDMTZkYmVoY2hlBGNjb2RlA2dtcHRvcDEwMDBwb29sd2lraXVwcmVzdARtaXQDQXJ0aWNsZSBNaXhlZCBMaXN0IE5ld3MgZm9yIFlvdSB3aXRoIE1vcmUgTGluawRwa2cDOWVlY2Y0MTktNDc4Mi0zNjNjLTg0YjMtMzI5NzA1ZGRhNjhjBHBvcwM3BHNlYwNNZWRpYUJMaXN0TWl4ZWROZXdzRm9yWW91Q0FUZW1wBHZlcgMzY2Y3YTJhMC1jMjViLTExZTEtYWY3Zi1lNWM5ZGM1OGU0Mzc-;_ylg=X3oDMTNhaHQ3cWRzBGludGwDdXMEbGFuZwNlbi11cwRwc3RhaWQDNmEyZDhkNmUtNzAzMS0zZTA0LWIxZTgtNWIzYjU2MmY0NzZmBHBzdGNhdANlbnRlcnRhaW5tZW50fGNlbGVicml0eQRwdANzdG9yeXBhZ2U-;_ylv=3). Curious if people here feel this was handled properly and the punishment fit the crime? It seems to me that it was and does.

 

This is another strong reminder about how insidious bullying is but I have to admit that I am a bit dismayed in a way about how things have played out and may be sending a dangerous message. The bus monitor has gotten a free trip to DisneyWorld and to another Florida resort, plus people have donated over $650k to her. While I think she was treated horribly, the solution that seems to be taken is to throw money at an individual. Money to help with some counseling to help her get over it is laudable, as well as the care/concern of others shown, however what about others that have been bullied and how they feel about this? I don't want to take away the focus from this terrible situation she had and in no way is she responsible for receiving the trips and money, but isn't this a bit over the top?

 

Finally, I wonder if the public reaction would have been as strong as it was if the person being bullied was gay.

[+ sam.fitzpatrick]

The school district has given their ruling and suspended the students for a year (they will have outside academic tutoring), will be required to complete 50hrs of community service with senior citizens and will receive formal behavioral training.....Curious if people here feel this was handled properly and the punishment fit the crime? It seems to me that it was and does.

 

If this was the Court of Sam, I would gone with a one semester suspension and full year exclusion of all extracurricular activities (sports, drama, dances, etc.) while retaining the community service and behavioral training. But I can support the decision of the school district.

[maxwellissmart]

I am sure everyone has probably heard about or seen the video of a bus monitor being verbally abused/bullied by a bunch of students on a school bus. If you haven't seen it here is a link to the disturbing video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sBhAxofUAZY

 

The school district has given their ruling and suspended the students for a year (they will have outside academic tutoring), will be required to complete 50hrs of community service with senior citizens and will receive formal behavioral training (http://news.yahoo.com/students-viciously-bullied-bus-monitor-suspended-022634219.html;_ylt=AppmhNOX66gAdfiFEFm7U0rzWed_;_ylu=X3oDMTZkYmVoY2hlBGNjb2RlA2dtcHRvcDEwMDBwb29sd2lraXVwcmVzdARtaXQDQXJ0aWNsZSBNaXhlZCBMaXN0IE5ld3MgZm9yIFlvdSB3aXRoIE1vcmUgTGluawRwa2cDOWVlY2Y0MTktNDc4Mi0zNjNjLTg0YjMtMzI5NzA1ZGRhNjhjBHBvcwM3BHNlYwNNZWRpYUJMaXN0TWl4ZWROZXdzRm9yWW91Q0FUZW1wBHZlcgMzY2Y3YTJhMC1jMjViLTExZTEtYWY3Zi1lNWM5ZGM1OGU0Mzc-;_ylg=X3oDMTNhaHQ3cWRzBGludGwDdXMEbGFuZwNlbi11cwRwc3RhaWQDNmEyZDhkNmUtNzAzMS0zZTA0LWIxZTgtNWIzYjU2MmY0NzZmBHBzdGNhdANlbnRlcnRhaW5tZW50fGNlbGVicml0eQRwdANzdG9yeXBhZ2U-;_ylv=3). Curious if people here feel this was handled properly and the punishment fit the crime? It seems to me that it was and does.

 

This is another strong reminder about how insidious bullying is but I have to admit that I am a bit dismayed in a way about how things have played out and may be sending a dangerous message. The bus monitor has gotten a free trip to DisneyWorld and to another Florida resort, plus people have donated over $650k to her. While I think she was treated horribly, the solution that seems to be taken is to throw money at an individual. Money to help with some counseling to help her get over it is laudable, as well as the care/concern of others shown, however what about others that have been bullied and how they feel about this? I don't want to take away the focus from this terrible situation she had and in no way is she responsible for receiving the trips and money, but isn't this a bit over the top?

 

Finally, I wonder if the public reaction would have been as strong as it was if the person being bullied was gay.

 

My reaction to this has been to be disgusted, and then to be disgusted again, and then finally to be disgusted for a different reason.

 

Disgust #1a: These children apparently think they are auditioning for the remake of "The Bad Seed." And apparently some of them have learned to bypass the garden variety insults of "you're fat" with "your family members kill themselves because you're so awful."

 

Disgust #1b: However, I was under the impression that she was a bus monitor? While no one wants to be insulted, sitting there and crying does absolutely nothing, and apparently this woman is quite wrong for the position. Do prison guards take what the prisoners say personally? Probably not. Are these children able to bully all of their older teachers in the same manner? Probably not. Someone didn't take the time to assess this woman's capabilities, or didn't bother teaching her the proper skills for managing these situations.

 

Disgust #2: I know, let's slap a $650K band-aid on this woman's problem. No one would deny that she's the wrong person for this job. Fine, let's find her a new one instead of giving her over half a million dollars. Second, the more money that comes in and the longer this goes on—the whole fundraising thing feels like a scam. She's already said she's has not, and doesn't believe she actually will receive any of this money.

 

And Wayout, I can't help but think that if the person had been gay there might have been someone with a thicker skin or some better coping mechanisms in place.

[BostonPhil]

What has really bothered me about the entire situation is:

 

Why was she not empowered to stop them from harassing her. It seems to me that if there were threat of any sort of punishment for this type of behavior it might not have happened in the first place.

 

Max, she's been doing this for 23 years. Ten minutes of particularly vile verbal attacks is a lot for even the strongest to deal with.

[Boner]

 

Disgust #1b: However, I was under the impression that she was a bus monitor? While no one wants to be insulted, sitting there and crying does absolutely nothing, and apparently this woman is quite wrong for the position.

 

While I'll agree that this woman lacked the skill sets to handle this situation - A school district issued taser to her could have prevented all of this from happening in the first place.

[bigvalboy]

My reaction to this has been to be disgusted, and then to be disgusted again, and then finally to be disgusted for a different reason.

 

Disgust #1a: These children apparently think they are auditioning for the remake of "The Bad Seed." And apparently some of them have learned to bypass the garden variety insults of "you're fat" with "your family members kill themselves because you're so awful."

 

Disgust #1b: However, I was under the impression that she was a bus monitor? While no one wants to be insulted, sitting there and crying does absolutely nothing, and apparently this woman is quite wrong for the position. Do prison guards take what the prisoners say personally? Probably not. Are these children able to bully all of their older teachers in the same manner? Probably not. Someone didn't take the time to assess this woman's capabilities, or didn't bother teaching her the proper skills for managing these situations.

 

Disgust #2: I know, let's slap a $650K band-aid on this woman's problem. No one would deny that she's the wrong person for this job. Fine, let's find her a new one instead of giving her over half a million dollars. Second, the more money that comes in and the longer this goes on—the whole fundraising thing feels like a scam. She's already said she's has not, and doesn't believe she actually will receive any of this money.

 

And Wayout, I can't help but think that if the person had been gay there might have been someone with a thicker skin or some better coping mechanisms in place.

 

 

 

Now I am disgusted, disgusted with your analysis. Nice spin, putting this disgusting situation on the fault of the school bus monitor. This is probably one of the most ridiculous things I have heard. Not one person involved has even remotely suggested that she was at fault. Have you worked with children of that age in any capacity? I don't know how to even start a conversation with you people on this.

 

I suppose when gay people get bashed, beat up and harrassed on there way home from a club at night, or in any situation, it is their fault because they did not know how to defend themselves. Perhaps you guys should have gone to church this morning instead of spending hours here posting these ridiculous comments.

 

Now I know why I find myself posting less and less here these days.

[down_to_business]

Now I am disgusted, disgusted with your analysis. Nice spin, putting this disgusting situation on the fault of the school bus monitor. This is probably one of the most ridiculous things I have heard. Not one person involved has even remotely suggested that she was at fault. Have you worked with children of that age in any capacity? I don't know how to even start a conversation with you people on this. Now I know why I find myself posting less and less here these days.

 

+1 Sounds like someone is jealous that people donated money to her instead of hiring him.

 

It wasn't like it was planned or anything. Some generous soul wanted to start a website to give this grandmother a vacation after the harassment she suffered. The fact that people's generosity went way beyond the call doesn't make her a bad person.

[+ deej]

Why was she not empowered to stop them from harassing her. It seems to me that if there were threat of any sort of punishment for this type of behavior it might not have happened in the first place.

 

monitor = observer

 

Not cop. Not guard. Not enforcer.

 

She's basically a paid witness in case one of the kids roughs up another.

 

Threats of punishment have NEVER been a deterrent to being a shithead.

[Boner]

Now I am disgusted, disgusted with your analysis. Nice spin, putting this disgusting situation on the fault of the school bus monitor. This is probably one of the most ridiculous things I have heard. Not one person involved has even remotely suggested that she was at fault.

 

I didn't read anywhere where anyone was blaming the school bus monitor for this event. What was suggested was that she was incapable of handling the situation she was in. If an adult in an authoritative position allows children to bully her and to cower her, then she is obviously in the wrong volunteer/paid position.

[Boner]

Also, I think female bullies are the worst kind of bully. Especially when in the presence of testosterone ginned-up young boys. They encourage the male bully to step up their hate.

 

Bus monitor duties and responsibilities:http://www.rccdc.org/files/Bus_Monitor_JD.pdf

[Phil_musc]

Just how much "authority" did this woman actually have on the bus? Some of you seem to think that a little training on her part in crowd management skills would have prevented this situation from happening. Huh?

 

I think it might be interesting - in addition to the other punishments meted out to the bullies - to have them have to arrange their own transportation to and from school for a period of time in the future, say mom or dad has to drive the kid to school. Inconvenient? Yes, maybe. But probably a really good means of having parental control reinstated. If mom and dad suddenly have to get into the picture as a part of the reparation, I wonder if this sort of thing might be less likely.

[maxwellissmart]

+1 Sounds like someone is jealous that people donated money to her instead of hiring him.

 

It wasn't like it was planned or anything. Some generous soul wanted to start a website to give this grandmother a vacation after the harassment she suffered. The fact that people's generosity went way beyond the call doesn't make her a bad person.

 

Okay, let's make something very clear. I'm in no way blaming the bus monitor for what happened on the bus, other than to say that she was obviously not trained properly for handling the situation that occurred. Let's be realistic here—I do not believe it was the first time this happened, especially since someone just happened to be videotaping it. There was absolutely nothing stopping the woman from approaching the driver and saying: "I am being verbally abused. Please stop the bus, and call the police or the authorities at the school immediately." As I stated earlier, sitting and crying accomplishes nothing—and simply fueled the fire for the children who are abusing an adult who has been hired to be an authority figure. If the bus monitor did not feel as though she were capable of the task at hand—again, she should have approached the driver and said: "I have a problem. Please help me."

 

Let me address the comments criticizing my point of view, or what I might possibly be thinking about the situation.

 

"Sounds like someone is jealous that people donated money to her instead of hiring him." I don't know what part of the sky or your ass that you pulled this from, but this has to be one of the more inane comments I've ever seen posted on this board. Yes, just because I disagree with the way the situation was handled—let's somehow project that into my fictional jealousy that the money did not, in fact, go into my pocket. The only reason why I criticized the fact that people started a collection for her was the ridiculousness of 1) expecting a fund-raiser to solve her problem when what she actually needs is a different job or coping skills to manage this one, and 2) raising $650K for this particular situation is absolutely ridiculous. I will say it right now: she does not deserve to have to put up with verbal abuse, but then again—she doesn't deserve $650K for having sat through it either. There are many, many people who are far worse off than Ms. Bus Monitor, and as it is—she has yet to even see a dime of the money. And I never once said that she planned anything or was a bad person—however, there are scam artists a-plenty to look at situations like this and see dollar signs. As I stated: someone else decided to start a fund-raiser for her, someone that she doesn't even know.

 

"Now I am disgusted, disgusted with your analysis. Nice spin, putting this disgusting situation on the fault of the school bus monitor."

 

Again, I don't know what part of my post you misinterpreted, but I never stated at any time that this was the fault of the bus monitor. In fact, I implied that the school authorities didn't provide her with the proper training to handle a situation like this—which left her with no other option but to sit there and cry and take it. I don't believe that anyone would agree that this woman is the right person for maintaining control over unruly students, and the first thing I expressed in my statement was my disgust at the types of kids that she was put in charge of.

 

"I suppose when gay people get bashed, beat up and harrassed on there way home from a club at night, or in any situation, it is their fault because they did not know how to defend themselves."

 

Thank you for projecting this logic onto another scenario that doesn't apply whatsoever—and I'm not even sure why you would try to put words like that in my mouth, when I've never said nor implied any such thing. Did you miss the part where I said that I thought gay people would actually be better equipped in such situations because they've had to put up with this kind of shit, or did you just choose to ignore it because it was convenient for your argument? Again, I've never stated once that anyone was directly at fault in this other than the children themselves, and whoever decided to place the woman in this position. However, it is the bus monitor's responsibility to report negative behavior that goes on around her. Again, I would be very surprised to find that this sort of behavior to this degree happened for the very first time that particular day.

 

If you want to take issue and have a difference of opinion with what I actually said, have at it. Don't try to put words in my mouth—it's wasted time and effort you could be applying to your pathological needs to be self-righteous and sanctimonious.

[Epigonos]

philmusc to answer your question regarding how much "authority" the woman actually had is difficult. It would depend on the attitude of the school district administration and the local school administration. I taught for thirty six years at a high school that was administered by only two different principals during that period -- both very strong individuals. We didn't have monitors ride our school buses. On one occasion, I vividly remember, a group of students were harassing the driver. She turned the bus around and returned to the school. At school she went to the principal’s office and explained the situation. He immediately came down to the bus and had the students report to the main office in a single file. There he had all of us, who were still at school, take a telephone and call each students parent(s) and inform them that they would have to personally pick their student up at the school. Some parents objected because they were at work. His responded that he would remain with their students AT SCHOOL until they were able to pick them up. A group of us remained with him until the last parent picked up his student at 7:00 p.m. The school district administration backed him up 100% and that was the last time that type of harassment occurred. Damn he was one hell of a great principal and working for him was pure pleasure because we always knew where he stood.

[+ nycman]

I agree with Max 100%.

 

She did not know how to handle the situation and allowed it to spin out of control.

 

She was the ADULT “monitor". To imply that she was hired to simply sit there and watch the children

behave like animals is ridiculous. The punishment seems somewhat extreme to me. Unfortunately

it's a typical knee jerk reaction by a scared school board to an overblown public relations disaster.

Don't get me wrong, these unruly children need to disciplined and harshly so. I just don't see how

pulling them out of the classroom for a year is going to help them or change their behavior. I would

have gone for more community service time and less time removed from their class.

 

I am not blaming her, but I agree that she was unfit to perform the job for which she was hired.

[maxwellissmart]

Perhaps you guys should have gone to church this morning instead of spending hours here posting these ridiculous comments.

 

Now I know why I find myself posting less and less here these days.

 

You have to do what you have to do.

 

And in the meantime, Mr. Selective Morality, perhaps you should have stayed in church instead of dropping in to post on a message board dedicated to hiring men to fuck.

[Boner]

philmusc to answer your question regarding how much "authority" the woman actually had is difficult. It would depend on the attitude of the school district administration and the local school administration.

 

Even-though this link defines a broad authority and responsibility for Bus Monitors in some school districts, it really shouldn't have come down to the monitors authority in the first place. This was an adult being bullied by children. Not only was she incapable of carrying out her job description for the safety and well being of other students on the bus - she was also unable to carry out those very same directives for her own personal safety and well being.

 

The woman was obviously incapable of fulfilling her duties and responsibilities as a bus monitor. This in no way excuses the behavior of the Children of the Corn who were riding that bus, that day.

[Epigonos]

Many of you people really don't get it. Bus monitors like crossing guards are most often minimum wage senior citizens needing to make a few extra bucks on which to live. In the majority of cases they receive NO training what so ever. Schools districts hope that their presence alone on the bus will prevent problems. In the vast majority of cases it works in a few, like this one, it doesn't. If you must hold someone or somebody responsible, other than the students involved, place the blame where it properly belongs with the school district or the school. As far as I’m concerned the students should have been suspended from school for a week, sent to a weekend bullying class (that’s the in thing right now), and then permanently barred from riding the school buses.

[+ deej]

Agree, Epigonos, although I disagree with the blame. It's two-part:

 

* The school district, although they DO NOT HAVE THE MONEY to provide armed guards and, more important:

* THE PARENTS who probably spent more time and money socializing their damn dog than their kids.

[Epigonos]

Deej I stand corrected and certainly accept additionally placing blame on the parents -- very true.

[jjkrkwood]

Well, here's the point where its Necessary for JJ to swoop in and hijack the thread.... BUT, I will stay out of this argument (although I DO agree with Max) in the hopes that BVB WILL actually post less on this board. (joke people).....

 

And while we're at it, I fuckin DESERVE $1 million dollars for all the harrassment and abuse YOU guys give me daily. Start sendin in those Cuntributions ! :o:o

[tyro]

Dude...try teaching high school freshmen!

T

[+ sam.fitzpatrick]

The woman was obviously incapable of fulfilling her duties and responsibilities as a bus monitor. This in no way excuses the behavior of the Children of the Corn who were riding that bus, that day.

 

Let's not too quickly judge whether she is capable of doing her duties. If her duty is protecting the safety of the children riding the bus, she did that. While the verbal abuse was unacceptable, there was risk of danger for the bus driver or other passengers on the bus. Her training may have very well been not to engage in this situation.

 

There are many times, that training one receives for an action is different than the public would expect. For example, in banking a teller is told to do whatever a robber wants regardless of whether a weapon is present or note. Doing less poses a lesser risk to other customers present, other employees, and the teller (and lesser liability to the bank as well.)

 

After reviewing the video again today, I can imagine that the school district would believe that the monitor handled things acceptably - - she did not take action that caused the situation to escalate into physical violence.

[orbital sander]

* THE PARENTS who probably spent more time and money socializing their damn dog than their kids.

 

I would be all for SEVERELY punishing the parents, to the point where they never forget...

[+ purplekow]

I wonder why most of the posters here assume that this is the typical manner in which this woman handles her responsibility. All of us have had a bad day and perhaps handled a professional interaction in less than an optimal manner. One day, after my car did a 180 on snow and I was moderately injured. I was late getting to my office by about 15 minutes. Someone who was without an appointment, was waiting for me, and when I walked into my office, she pointed at her watch to indicate that I was late. I asked what the issue was and she said that she expected that an office would open on time and that my being late was unprofessional. I responded by tossing her out of the office and informing her she were no longer welcome to return. I then emphasized my request to leave with the following. "You want to see unprofessional? Get out of my office, you fucking cunt." That was the first time in my life I ever used that word. Not my finest hour, but not on the internet. Twenty years have passed since then, and i still cringe when I think about it. Though, let's face it, she really was being a bitch.

 

To tell the truth, those kids had me near tears and if I had been there, I probably would have smacked them on the back of the head.

[Rick Munroe]

"Get out of my office, you fucking cunt."

 

Is it wrong that this turned me on?