What a Fiasco

[ErieBear]

I realize that I haven't a lot of experience hiring escorts, but I just had one of the worst encounters ever. It started out with him being 45 minutes late. He got here and had to shower He "forgot" to bring a condom, so my condoms didn't work. After 25 minutes (of a 2 hour appointment) I finally said this isn't working. So he showered again and demanded the full $400 we had agreed upon. When I balked, he threatened to break the tv in the room. I finally got him out of here for $250. Ugh.

 

Please, tell me it gets better.

[Decatur Guy]

I'm sorry that has happened. I can say I've been hiring semi-regularly for two years and nothing close to that has happened to me, so yes, it can get better.

 

Was this a well-reviewed escort from the Daddy's site?

[ErieBear]

No. He wasn't reviewed at all. But i had talked to him on the phone and he seemed like a really nice guy. i learned my lesson. I think i'm going to take a break from guys for awhile.

[orbital sander]

Wow,

 

Sorry that you had such a rough time. I think that one cannot do too much research, perhaps you can find someone to give you a better experience next time.

 

It would be helpful if you would consider posting a review. This guy sounds violent, and others should be informed.

 

Take Care

[Toulouse]

I'm sorry this happened ErieBear. You seem like such a sweet guy. Please don't give up on hiring men. I've had some of the most memorable sexual experiences of my life with escorts who are well-reviewed on Daddys. I've had a bad apple a time or two also, but the good has far outweighed the bad. Hang in there.

[CowboyUp]

So he showered again and demanded the full $400 we had agreed upon. When I balked, he threatened to break the tv in the room. I finally got him out of here for $250. Ugh.

 

This SUCKS! Please write a review exposing this loser asap..it's the best option we have for weeding out the bad rentboys. And, yes, it definitely gets better.

[instudiocity]

ErieBear, sorry to hear about this, but,

 

a) PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE write a review.

b) include some more details - he was 45 minutes late and did or did not keep in contact with you while he was on the way

 

Finally, depending on how he handled the delay in getting to your appointment, I'd say that 45 minutes late is quite disrespectful - unless there was some emergency - and that should be a clue as to whether you decided to proceed with the date.

[+ purplekow]

When he threatened to break the TV i leave the room and i call the police. As distasteful as that sounds and possible embarrassing, it is likely a call to the police will send him on his way. if he does break anything, you have a phone number and other means of reaching him to give to the police. Granted, they might not want to get involved, but he is not likely to want to take that chance. There is also something to be said for keeping a gun in the room, should you ever feel threatened.

More on point, hire only well reviewed escorts and you reduce the likelihood of this to almost zero.

[justaguy]

Erie,

I’m sorry to hear about the ugly experience, but I have to say I did wonder if you were moving too quickly based on your last post.. My advice is that you spend time researching your next guy by looking at the reviews on Daddy’s and using the search function in the upper right of this Message Forum. Research doesn’t guarantee the perfect experience, but it can help you avoid bad apples and can go a long way towards getting you a good match. There’s a great deal of collective experience amongst the regular posters of this forum, so ask questions about anything that doesn’t get answered through reading the reviews and searching the forum posts. For right now, breathe, relax, and realize that this fiasco is only a bump in the road. Believe me, it can and will get much, much better.

[wayout]

Allow me to also express to you ErieBear how sad it was to hear what you went through. As the old saying goes, when you fall off the horse the best thing to do is to get back on him again as soon as you can. So don't give up hiring but rather just work out the process you go through for hiring to increase your chances of success. There's been some previous threads on the hiring process and you can search for that as they provide excellent advice with almost everyone agreeing that using the review site and this forum can be immensely valuable. Many times in my early days of hiring before finding this site I had some very mixed results. While none got into threats of or actual physical attacks, quite a few were a waste of time and money. My own view of having much greater success at hiring came after reviewing my hiring practices in some detail, gaining experience with identifying certain "red flags" in setting up the meeting and using this site as a resource. And never let your "little head" make all the decisions.

[jjkrkwood]

No. He wasn't reviewed at all. But i had talked to him on the phone and he seemed like a really nice guy. i learned my lesson. I think i'm going to take a break from guys for awhile.

 

Erie, as they say "buyer beware". As you spend time here and read the threads, you will get that it is often better to be SAFE than sorry. Going with a personal referral or well reviewed escort usually helps alleviate your situation.

 

But these things do happen, and they are just a part of the "Hiring game"... Even with a well reviewed escort, you dont have a guarantee that your chemistry with him will be the same as others had. Its a chance, and a risk always..

 

Dont get discouraged, because when it Works, its Awesome.... But certainly if you have the time, energy and willingness to search for guys in the FREE world, go for it, and save the Bucks for your retirement. ;-)

[+ Axiom2001]

I realize that I haven't a lot of experience hiring escorts, but I just had one of the worst encounters ever. It started out with him being 45 minutes late. He got here and had to shower He "forgot" to bring a condom, so my condoms didn't work. After 25 minutes (of a 2 hour appointment) I finally said this isn't working. So he showered again and demanded the full $400 we had agreed upon. When I balked, he threatened to break the tv in the room. I finally got him out of here for $250. Ugh.

 

Please, tell me it gets better.

 

A few years back, I had an appointment with an escort in San Francisco. When he called me, he relayed that he'd be late because he was at dinner

with friends. I became upset but waited and waited. When he did show up looking so hot and masculine after getting off of his motorcycle and

bringing in his helmet-- I announced that THE APPOINTMENT was OFF. His lateness was later than he'd initially indicated; I was NOT UP for a "hot

roll amongst the sheets" after this had transpired.

 

He heard me and left.

 

[To the originator of this post: I would NOT have gone through what you endured. I would have let the guy leave immediately

upon his arrival, especially since he was not prepared in any way! You learned from this, I presume, and will NOT undergo another experience as this one!]

 

AND IT DOES GET BETTER when you exert the upper hand and control the situation! - -

[seeker630]

No. He wasn't reviewed at all. But i had talked to him on the phone and he seemed like a really nice guy. i learned my lesson. I think i'm going to take a break from guys for awhile.

 

PLEASE write a review, and hopefully save someone ELSE from a similar experience. The writing process can also be cathartic, and sometimes helps pinpoint why/how things went wrong or what warning signs might have been missed, and improve your chances for a successful hire enxt time. (And I do NOT mean to imply that anything was your fault!)

[+ Charlie]

Don't give up on men, give up on hiring guys you know next to nothing about. That's why there are sites like this one.

 

By the way, unless he is really not thinking clearly (was he stoned?), he is unlikely to follow through on that sort of threat, because you know who he is and how the police can find him. He is counting on you to be too embarrassed to reveal the situation to authorities, but if you make it clear that you are not intimidated, he will probably take whatever you offer and leave. However, if you think he is not rational, then of course do whatever is necessary to get rid of him.

[maxwellissmart]

Please, tell me it gets better.

 

You know, the phrase "get the fuck out or I'm calling the cops" works wonders at getting rid of pesky, unwanted escorts. So does "you're 45 minutes late, I'm afraid I'm not interested anymore." And so does "hey guys, does anyone know about _______? No? Okay, maybe I'll look for someone with some positive reviews then."

 

Your situation could happen to anyone. But it didn't happen to anyone—it happened to you. Do yourself a favor and fix it so that it doesn't happen again.

 

And that forthcoming review should be quite interesting.

[jjkrkwood]

You know, the phrase "get the fuck out or I'm calling the cops" works wonders at getting rid of pesky, unwanted escorts. So does "you're 45 minutes late, I'm afraid I'm not interested anymore." And so does "hey guys, does anyone know about _______? No? Okay, maybe I'll look for someone with some positive reviews then."

 

Your situation could happen to anyone. But it didn't happen to anyone—it happened to you. Do yourself a favor and fix it so that it doesn't happen again.

 

And that forthcoming review should be quite interesting.

 

Max, while i DO agree with you wholeheartedly, you are overlooking the element of fear that comes into play in these situations. Sometimes the fear propels things forward if the adrenalin kicks in, but sometimes it is crippling. And keep in mind that the OP is really not experienced in dealing with all the different scenarios that occur with Hirings. Of course he will learn, and I know you are not a harsh or unreasonable person, but your post did come off a bit insensitive. (even to me, who doesnt have a conscience)... Personally, I would have kicked the guys ass, but not everyone is ME, and the OP definitely needs to learn from the good AND the bad.

[adriano46]

Erie,

 

my very first hire was a nightmare, left me feeling guilty, filthy, and someone with little or no self-worth.

 

BUT within a few minths I tried it sgain, thanks to advice given here (in the "old" Hooboy days) and am forever glad I listened.

 

Definitely write a a review if this jerk, read up on positive recommendstions for a guy that appeals to you, and get on that horse, or bike, or whatever again! Good luck!

[maxwellissmart]

Max, while i DO agree with you wholeheartedly, you are overlooking the element of fear that comes into play in these situations. Sometimes the fear propels things forward if the adrenalin kicks in, but sometimes it is crippling. And keep in mind that the OP is really not experienced in dealing with all the different scenarios that occur with Hirings. Of course he will learn, and I know you are not a harsh or unreasonable person, but your post did come off a bit insensitive. (even to me, who doesnt have a conscience)... Personally, I would have kicked the guys ass, but not everyone is ME, and the OP definitely needs to learn from the good AND the bad.

 

Yes, I understand that clients are often nervous and afraid of meeting with nice escorts—let alone ones that turn out to be threatening and potentially violent. But I also think Erie should have canceled the appointment when the guy was 45 minutes late and simply not answered the door if he didn't want a confrontation. Is this "fiasco" Erie's fault? No—but he does have a role in what happened. Playing a game like escorting that's fraught with all sorts of potential pitfalls (up to and including murder) is not for the faint-at-heart, and while many people go into this completely unaware—it's not the smartest thing to do.

 

Hence, the board. I had not a clue about the existence of this forum when I first started escorting. Many of my clients still don't—and I mention it to them often and they are very glad for the knowledge. If you are fortunate enough to have what basically amounts to Escort Wikipedia—use it. And on that note, it makes me angry when people break out the torches and tear down escorts for the smallest of perceived infractions (such as how they do or do not conduct business), yet when a client actually gets ripped off it takes an act of Congress to get them to post anything about it—and there's still one thread circulating about where the client basically ended the discussion with: "well, (sigh) I guess (sigh) I should have written (sigh) a negative review (sigh) [but I was too goddamned lazy to do so]."

 

My point to Erie is this: it gets better. But only to the amount that you take the time to make it better. If you want to have fun hiring escorts, hire fun escorts. The way you know they are fun is because they have reviews that state "______ is FUN." Fun escorts don't show up late, and they have all the necessary stuff with them. Fun escorts will also take 10-15 minutes to meet you in a lobby or a safe place away from your house, so you can get a sense of whether or not you want to go through with the appointment. If you don't find an escort who does these things—don't hire him, and keep looking until you find one who will.

 

If the post is insensitive—so be it. But if I were in Erie's shoes, I'd rather one person take me aside and say: "here's what you're doing wrong" than a hundred telling me what a wonderful person I am and how I deserve better.

[whipped guy]

Sorry about it all..

 

Erie... We all have a bad one along the way... but your situation was perhaps beyond "a bad one".

 

After lurking here for about 5 years... and having had my first bad experience... I joined officially because other members posted warnings about the guy who was responsible for my bad outing... Obviously I felt the need to confirm and expand upon the warnings already posted. Plus, I felt that I was among friends... and we are indeed a support group for such situations. I hope that you let the cat out of the bag regarding this rotten apple... and write a review as well.

 

Incidentally the escort in question had good reviews... but they were probably bogus... I have since learned to read between the lines. Plus... and amusingly so... after I and others had posted warnings in this forum he miraculously received several reviews that were rebuttals of what was posted here... strange??... not really!!!

[jjkrkwood]

Yes, I understand that clients are often nervous and afraid of meeting with nice escorts—let alone ones that turn out to be threatening and potentially violent. But I also think Erie should have canceled the appointment when the guy was 45 minutes late and simply not answered the door if he didn't want a confrontation. Is this "fiasco" Erie's fault? No—but he does have a role in what happened. Playing a game like escorting that's fraught with all sorts of potential pitfalls (up to and including murder) is not for the faint-at-heart, and while many people go into this completely unaware—it's not the smartest thing to do.

 

Hence, the board. I had not a clue about the existence of this forum when I first started escorting. Many of my clients still don't—and I mention it to them often and they are very glad for the knowledge. If you are fortunate enough to have what basically amounts to Escort Wikipedia—use it. And on that note, it makes me angry when people break out the torches and tear down escorts for the smallest of perceived infractions (such as how they do or do not conduct business), yet when a client actually gets ripped off it takes an act of Congress to get them to post anything about it—and there's still one thread circulating about where the client basically ended the discussion with: "well, (sigh) I guess (sigh) I should have written (sigh) a negative review (sigh) [but I was too goddamned lazy to do so]."

 

My point to Erie is this: it gets better. But only to the amount that you take the time to make it better. If you want to have fun hiring escorts, hire fun escorts. The way you know they are fun is because they have reviews that state "______ is FUN." Fun escorts don't show up late, and they have all the necessary stuff with them. Fun escorts will also take 10-15 minutes to meet you in a lobby or a safe place away from your house, so you can get a sense of whether or not you want to go through with the appointment. If you don't find an escort who does these things—don't hire him, and keep looking until you find one who will.

 

If the post is insensitive—so be it. But if I were in Erie's shoes, I'd rather one person take me aside and say: "here's what you're doing wrong" than a hundred telling me what a wonderful person I am and how I deserve better.

 

Again, YES you are totally right, and YES the client must assume some responsibility, but it is a learning experience and Erie is a bit "green".

 

As to why a client doesnt abort a session up front when an escort arrives late, Well this has been addressed to death on this site. they are HORNY and erect and figure "he's here now, and doenst look so bad, so what the hell" ? Yes this is a conscious choice the client makes, and from then on you can say he made his bed, so now lie in it......We all have horror stories when it comes to sexual experiences, whether paid or not. Its what you take away from those experiences that is the important thing. And if you DONT learn, then you can say OH WELL !

[MsGuy]

There is also something to be said for keeping a gun in the room, should you ever feel threatened.

 

PK, I always read your posts with pleasure. You're a fountain of clear headed common sense and good humored nuanced wisdom. This one time excepted; completely out of character. Maybe at your home where you're isolated and escape is readily blocked. Maybe.

[GoodFella69]

Erie,

I hire often in LA/Burbank/Orange County/Ontario. So it would be helpful to read a review on this guy and cross him OFF my list. I truly regret this happened to you and hope your next hire exceeds your highest standards and expectations. I've had many more positive than negative experiences thanks to Daddy's Reviews and this wonderful forum...I wish the same for you.

Keep on hiring,

Goodfella

[jimboivyo]

it's not a fiasco. it's not doing your research and getting burned because of it.

 

next time, don't blame the unprofessional guy you asked to come over, blame the process in which you found him. this kind of thing doesn't need to happen if you take time to select folks who have great reviews.

[whipped guy]

it's not a fiasco. it's not doing your research and getting burned because of it.

 

next time, don't blame the unprofessional guy you asked to come over, blame the process in which you found him. this kind of thing doesn't need to happen if you take time to select folks who have great reviews.

Sometimes we get burned even when research is properly done... My bad outing from way back when (as noted above) was courtesy of a guy who not only had good reviews but was also on the "buddy list" of two other escorts with whom I had previous experience. It just goes to prove that at times more than one person can be fooled... but as the saying goes, "not all the people all of the time"... as things have a way of "catching up" sooner or later.

 

Yes, doing research helps... but it is not an iron-clad guarantee that absolute perfection will be the final result.

 

The most I will say is that this is a learning experience... and I quote the one time signature of the wise Brooklyn Guy,

 

"Experience is what you get when you don't get what you wanted."

 

So, Erie... you have gained experience... and with experience things will definitely improve... best of luck in the future!

 

At any rate, we need to be warned about this bozo...

[seeker630]

it's not a fiasco. it's not doing your research and getting burned because of it.

next time, don't blame the unprofessional guy you asked to come over, blame the process in which you found him. this kind of thing doesn't need to happen if you take time to select folks who have great reviews.

 

The fact that the OP said there are no reviews shows that he did at least some research. It's a fact that it's not always possible to GET a well-reviewed guy at the time & place our circumstances dictate, and sometimes our only choice is to gamble on an unknown or forgo the experience altogether. Whether or not that was the case in this instance is unknown.