Why Do Escorts Blow Me Off...?

[nynakedtop]

Ok guys - help me with this one....

 

I seem to be having trouble booking time with an escort and I figure I must be doing something wrong. Here are the possible trouble areas:

 

• I prefer to make initial contact by email or text rather than by phone. Is that bad?
  
• I like to book about a day in advance... as I seem to have a high testosterone level and am always horny, I am generally thinking about a 24 hour in advance thing rather than a right away. I figured that approach is better for escorts, too, who might want to be able to manage their calendars a bit better. Wrong?
  

I don't think there is anything sketchy about me. I am presentable, articulate, professional, blah blah... But, seriously, two guys here in New York blew me off today already!

 

Thanks for putting up with my whining, hehe... Just looking for some hel!

[Kevin Slater]

This topic comes up frequently on this board, most recently here: http://www.companyofmen.org/showthread.php?77981-How-do-I-get-an-escort-to-cantact-me-and-then-what . Take a look at that thread.

 

You're having difficulty setting something up and rightly suspect that it may be your resistance to calling and desire to book for the future. Why not give in and just place a call when you're ready to play? It sounds like we both know that will solve the issue. As for me, I don't encourage folk to text about a future date. Experience has taught me that they're just getting their rocks off remotely.

 

Hope this helps.

 

Kevin Slater

[nynakedtop]

It does, a lot, Kevin. The frustrating thing for me is that I am sincere in my desire to complete the arrangement. But I understand that the life of an escort is often plagued by people who flake in one way or another.

 

I am just a bit telephone-shy, honest!

[Kevin Slater]

Yup. Like you say, the problem is that you know you're serious, but the escort doesn't. He has no way of sorting your text out from the ten others that came in that day from jackers off. Besides, to shy to call unfortunately sometimes translates to too shy to show. So grow a pair, make the call, and have yourself a wonderful time. There are many great guys here in NYC to chose from; you'll be amply rewarded for your bravery. Happy hunting, and let us know how it goes.

 

Kevin Slater

[nynakedtop]

Yup. Like you say, the problem is that you know you're serious, but the escort doesn't. He has no way of sorting your text out from the ten others that came in that day from jackers off. Besides, to shy to call unfortunately sometimes translates to too shy to show. So grow a pair, make the call, and have yourself a wonderful time. There are many great guys here in NYC to chose from; you'll be amply rewarded for your bravery. Happy hunting, and let us know how it goes.

 

Kevin Slater

 

You are so wise and helpful, Kevin. And the two times we met (yes!) you were patient and kind (amongst other attributes...)

 

Time for me to "get over it" and pick up the phone!

[jgoo]

It does, a lot, Kevin. The frustrating thing for me is that I am sincere in my desire to complete the arrangement. But I understand that the life of an escort is often plagued by people who flake in one way or another.

 

I am just a bit telephone-shy, honest!

 

I also prefer to book by email and in advance. Typically I am traveling to a city and I explain that in my initial contact I would like to have certain things set up in advance. I haven't had many serious issues with making contact with or booking those that I am interested in hiring (but not 100%). It is useful when an escort includes in his ad his preferences about contact and how far in advance they prefer to set up a meeting.

 

Ultimately the escort has little idea of the sincerity of the potential client until further down the road, perhaps even up to the time of the appointment meeting. There are many silver tongue gentlemen who can sound sincere and have a way of making the escort feel comfortable but in reality, as Kevin says, there are too many who are just getting their rocks off

 

The whole issue of telephone-shy, especially when talking to an escort, is perhaps an entire separate thread as I suspect many others have that same issue. If I can avoid the whole telephone thing, I would be much happier but certainly I understand many escorts do require it in advance for many of their own reasons. I just find the conversations to be quite awkward, mostly from my end. Its interesting that when I meet up with the escort, I have no problem with carrying on a conversation and am not shy in that way, but just on the phone.

[Epigonos]

I ALWAYS make my initial contact with an escort by email. If I don't receive a response within a day or two I move on. I have noticed, in the last year or so, a drop in the number of responses I receive. I find it hard to believe that some escorts really believe that they can better discern the intentions of a potential client by telephone rather than by email. My first email is short and very direct. If the escort chooses to ignore my email it is his loss as much or more than mine. He simple looses a very easy client and I look for and find another guy. Frankly I am arrogant enough to believe that in the end it is a buyers market.

[Bosguy]

As a client, I prefer initial contact by phone and usually book in advance with subsequent communication (phone and email) prior to meeting) I feel more confortable talking to people (I am Irish and therefore have the "gift of the gab") because I think you get to know more about each other, but there has to be follow up to assure the escort that your intentions are real! Escorts, unfortunately and unforgiveably, get left out in the cold too many times by "supposed clients" and therefore must be cautious for their own sake.

 

This way works very well for me. Whichever way you choose, I wish you the best of luck.

 

Take care.

 

Bill K.

 

P.S. See you next month in Palm Springs--Hot weather, HOT men, and great friends!!!

[nate_sf]

• I prefer to make initial contact by email or text rather than by phone. Is that bad?
  
• I like to book about a day in advance... as I seem to have a high testosterone level and am always horny, I am generally thinking about a 24 hour in advance thing rather than a right away. I figured that approach is better for escorts, too, who might want to be able to manage their calendars a bit better. Wrong?
  

 

I don't see anything wrong here. If I received this communication from you I'd respond no problem, as long as it was not a series of multiple emails. I think email is a preferable to text for intial contact though, and I'll take an email contact more seriously than a text.

 

As others have mentioned, you could check the escort listing and see if he prefers to be contacted by phone or email initially. I prefer email myself. You could seek out escorts who prefer email contact, they may respond more reliably.

 

If you don't hear back from an email contact, you could call and ask if he received the email.

 

If you're phone-shy, don't worry. I'd say on the majority of the phone contacts I get, the caller sounds uncomfortable so you're not alone. Making a phone inquiry can be awkward, and most people have less practice making an escort appointment over the phone than they might, say, a dinner reservation. It's OK to sound awkward, so don't worry about it.

[Steven_Draker]

But, seriously, two guys here in New York blew me off today already!

 

Hi Nynakedtop,

do you care to clarify how did you get blown off?

[raulgmanzo]

The number in my ads forwards to my cell phone but txts are often not forwarded. I just didn't think that people would make initial contact that way.

 

Once they've contacted me I'm happy to give my cell number which does take texts. But with a tiny keypad, It's hard to answer "What do you get into?" while walking down the street. Though texts are great for an address or last minute reminder.

 

If one is looking to get together within a couple hours then calling makes sense. But for anything in advance I prefer email. Often a call has a bad connection, and I HATE getting to know a person by yelling "Hold on a train is passing by", "WHAT?", "Let me walk over to the window", "Sorry can you repeat that AGAIN?".

 

Though there are times when traveling with a bad internet connection, in some of those cases I've begged: "PLEASE just call".

 

With email it isn't a big deal if the person is serious, blue-skying for next year, or even just wanking off. It isn't preventing me from getting another serous call or email.

I can usually find a few minutes in the day to answer someone EVEN if I think they are not serious. Sometimes it turns out that they actually become good clients. But it can be nerve wracking when you are talking by phone and hearing beep that you have a another call waiting.

 

Email, to me is the least intrusive, most allowing of thoughtful response, way to initiate contact. Then I'm happy (and appreciate greatly) to follow up with a phone call at a good time and place.

 

Ok guys - help me with this one....

 

I seem to be having trouble booking time with an escort and I figure I must be doing something wrong. Here are the possible trouble areas:

 

• I prefer to make initial contact by email or text rather than by phone. Is that bad?
  
• I like to book about a day in advance... as I seem to have a high testosterone level and am always horny, I am generally thinking about a 24 hour in advance thing rather than a right away. I figured that approach is better for escorts, too, who might want to be able to manage their calendars a bit better. Wrong?
  

I don't think there is anything sketchy about me. I am presentable, articulate, professional, blah blah... But, seriously, two guys here in New York blew me off today already!

 

Thanks for putting up with my whining, hehe... Just looking for some hel!

[Juan Vancouver]

Don't start an enquire through text messages... ever.

 

While I have absolutely no problem with a first enquiry being made through email, I will not confirm an appointment and therefore will not meet anyone whose phone number I don't have and have called at least once during the process of booking the session.

 

I am perfectly aware of the fact that there are many men out there for whom keeping their identity and privacy is of paramount importance, but also know that a respectful and serious client that understands that I am a professional in my field respected for being discreet, will have absolutely no problem sharing his information with me. I have had many high profile clients for whom discretion was vital and in all those instances they volunteered their names and phone numbers in order to confirm a session. Needless to say that unless I am expressly asked to do so, I would never keep those numbers or contact info.

 

Sure, enquire through a concise email where you clearly explain date, place, length and preferences for your desired appointment, but be ready to call to confirm.

 

If you are phone shy don't worry. All you have to do is say: "Hi, I am so and so, we emailed each other about meeting tomorrow and I am calling to confirm." You can even write this down and read it from a cue card if you think you may be too nervous.

 

As for texts... just don't.

 

Escorts are much busier than it is normally thought. For any busy professional it is of paramount important to communicate in efficacious ways, with clarity, concision and warmth in order to produce specific results. While you may be bored in your cubicle thinking it is a good idea to get all hot and bothered texting the escort that you may (or may not) meet tomorrow, I can assure you that he would prefer if you left the hot talk to the actual meeting.

 

You should especially avoid text conversations like:

 

You: "hi"

 

Escort: "who is this?"

 

You: "How R U?"

 

Long pause...

 

You: "You there?"

 

You: "You really hot"

 

Escort: "Thanks. Who is this?"

 

You: "Just checking you out."

 

I think you get the idea.

 

Text messages (or emails) are NOT a conversation. Text messages in the context of a commercial communication have to be clear, short, to the point and used only when a conversation is not needed:

 

"I am on my way, but may get a little late. Sorry."

"Just want you to have my address, it is so and so....."

"I liked talking to you yesterday, please call me. I am ready to confirm our session."

 

If I think that my "prospective client" (quotation marks are not a mistake) only wants a hot chat I will text back asking him to call me. I do not communicate through text messages. I have found that serious clients call me right away and non serious clients simply stop texting. I have been having dinner with other escorts and as soon as I ask a prospective client to call me instead of texting me, the next escort in the table starts getting the same hot chat "enquiry". I have been at a dinner party in which up to four escorts go through the same thing from the same "client".

 

Last, but not least, cellphones are a wonderful thing. The most modern of gadgets tend to have not only an impeccable memory but also have the ability to understand when a text message is coming from a person that has texted you previously and it displays all those texts together, in chronological order. It is very easy for your escort to know if you have engaged in a useless succession of texts for the purpose of getting your jollies, so don't be surprised if an escort simply dismisses your "this time it's like... totally serious" enquiry if you have almost booked (through texts) several times before. This applies specially if you go into graphic details during each one of those text conversations.

 

In other words, sure, email him and see if he is available.

 

Then call him to confirm and share all the relevant information about your possible time together.

 

If you forgot something, you can either email or call him once.

 

Then just save all your dirty thoughts and hot chat for the time when you can actually share it with him.

 

If an escort dismisses you following this simple instructions, then you are better off without seeing him.

 

 

 

I hope you the best of meetings!

[nynakedtop]

Hey guys! Me the original poster here again. And with a "happy ending" (no not THAT kind...) to report.

 

First: to ALL of you who posted thoughts and responses, thank you so much. You all articulated well what I had been suspecting, but it is great to have my ideas validated. Thanks for your time, understanding, and willingness to help out in a supportive way.

 

Part of the reason for my problems here is the very fact that not everyone is as joined-at-the-hip to his email as I am. Escorts are busy professionals and may not be in the habit of checking and responding to emails as religiously as some.... like me. The guys have written me back, I responded with apologies for taking the circuitous route of emailing, I have set an appointment with one for tomorrow, and we have exchanged texts and phone numbers to confirm.

 

It really IS that easy!

 

Lesson learned: a short and direct email is OK when intentions are honest AND a follow-up phone call is made. It is simply a matter of treating an escort as the professional he is, with the courtesy and respect that he is due.

 

Although still a bit new to the wonderful world of seeking escort services, I am trying to be good, and I am a wiser person for this.

[+ sam.fitzpatrick]

I usually prefer to arrange an appointment a couple of days in advance and make the first contact via email, with a follow up phone call. As such, I'm not expecting an immediate response, and when I'm wanting to schedule time with someone with great reviews, I suspect that no one is sitting by his phone waiting for me to call.

 

And a request for the escorts who prefer phone contact; please keep your phone turned off during my one- or two-hour session with you. Nothing ruins the illusion that you enjoyed our time together as much as I did as you answering the phone as I am getting dressed and readying to leave. I will respect your time, but please do not make me fell like you are pushing me out the door while asking your caller to hold on while you give me the quick hug and goodbye at the door.

 

(Overnight or multiple day sessions it is fine to check email and voice mail - heck I need to do the same.)

[justaguy]

There ya go. Just to ad a bit. In your initial inquiry, you put together email and 24 hrs. That's too short a time frame for a response. As stated earlier, if your needs are that immediate, call.

[Guest countryboywny]

If my initial contact with an escort is by email, I always include my phone number. I think that gives the escort some confidence that I'm not screwing around with him.

[jawjateck]

Since I don't do "quickies" (hourlies) and do not "impulse" hire, I plan my escort fun well in-advance, beginning first with an email. I write clearly about who I am, where I am, what interests me, etc. If the escort responds timely, coherently (using clear, informative, declarative sentences), and provides an affirmation that we would be a good match based on my preferences and his skills, then we take it to the next level to speak on the phone, to work out the details. Most of the incompatible guys eliminate themselves from consideration at the email stage, and thus, guys that I have no intention of pursuing further (after failing the email test), don't have my cell number. It has happened that the escort fails to be clear, coherent, and professional on the phone, but that is very rare. I never use texting to begin communication with an escort; only after establishing a business relationship with the guy, do I engage in limited texts.

 

There are too many quality escorts available for our enjoyment to get hung up on one who doesn't have his act together and can't handle the upfront aspects of the biz correctly.

[jgoo]

If my initial contact with an escort is by email, I always include my phone number. I think that gives the escort some confidence that I'm not screwing around with him.

 

With a very low or zero cost for setting up an alternative phone number (i.e. google voice), it seems that it is getting easier for those so inclined to play games with escorts. I still believe giving a phone number probably provides a higher level of confidence but I think not as much as it used to. I continue to gain greater appreciation for what professional escorts have to deal with on a daily basis and the increasing challenges that they face.

[Decatur Guy]

I'm in the camp of folks who think if you're not even willing to commit to a phone call, you're very likely not to commit to actually showing up. The majority of no-shows are people who WON'T make a phone call. So even though you may be sincere, your actions place you in the camp of people who are not, and there's no way to tell the difference.

 

If I were an escort, I wouldn't make an appointment with someone who wouldn't talk on the phone at least once. The ones I've hired probably wished I talked a little less (LOL), but I think it's important to spend 10 to 30 minutes talking and figuring out if it's a good connection for both parties. You simply can't achieve that via e-mail and texts.

 

I think e-mails are fine for verification of appointment, follow-up questions to phone call, etc. But a phone conversation really needs to be had, especially for the first encounter.

[hunkymuscles]

From my experience the clients who don't follow through are the ones who only contact you through email. If a client contacts me a week or more in advance through email and follows it through with a few more emails, those clients usually don't follow through with an actual session. I think they just enjoy the attention they are getting through the emails. The serious clients usually call me direct. If they decide to use email, they keep it short, simple, two emails or less, and always follow through with a phone call to confirm.

http://hunkymuscles.tumblr.com

http://www.daddysreviews.com/review/raul_sf

[gcursor]

I agree...with Jawjateck...

 

First, I'd like to say that this posting is not sponsored by Jawjateck Company, its sponsors or any of its affiliates...with that in mind

 

I'm like what jawjateck said as well in many ways. I don't do short ones and usually like to take the time to get to know somebody. Typically I use only email at first although I did text somebody recently and they said it was good that I did because they hadn't had access to email in some days. I'm usually quite clear with the people that I'm serious and that I like the whole "get together" experience and do what I can to show them respect also when putting things together. I also look very closely at the reviews to see with an attention to seeing how pleasant the person is to be with through it all...or I will use "word of mouth" if somebody knows me.

 

To me, it's about getting to know the people and connecting with somebody nice for that brief moment in time. It's about the anticipation...the build-up and then...it's so much more

 

gcursor

 

Since I don't do "quickies" (hourlies) and do not "impulse" hire, I plan my escort fun well in-advance, beginning first with an email. I write clearly about who I am, where I am, what interests me, etc. If the escort responds timely, coherently (using clear, informative, declarative sentences), and provides an affirmation that we would be a good match based on my preferences and his skills, then we take it to the next level to speak on the phone, to work out the details. Most of the incompatible guys eliminate themselves from consideration at the email stage, and thus, guys that I have no intention of pursuing further (after failing the email test), don't have my cell number. It has happened that the escort fails to be clear, coherent, and professional on the phone, but that is very rare. I never use texting to begin communication with an escort; only after establishing a business relationship with the guy, do I engage in limited texts.

 

There are too many quality escorts available for our enjoyment to get hung up on one who doesn't have his act together and can't handle the upfront aspects of the biz correctly.

[+ Tom Isern]

over the years i've had the opportunity to work with dozens and dozens of escorts. i've frequently hired for client group sessions. one rule seems to be almost (i can think of some really wonderful exceptions to the rule) universally true: the younger the escort, the less reliable—in every department. who are you contacting, i'm tempted to ask, but can't really...

[+ Tygerscent]

Now... the whole phone thing sounds like a good idea except when you throw into the equation: time zone difference, time driving, on a boat, in the air, on trains, with other Clients who rightfully prefer their Escort not to be on the cell talking to other people on their dime, other peoples schedule... phone calls are probably the most difficult means of communication it seems... I actually have to schedule specific time on specific days... The average time on the phone with any given person tends to be at least one half hour, (and on up to four or more hours)... and its not like just one person is wanting to call and talk on the phone... 10 one half hour calls is five hours time on the phone~

Add in regular daily email time and working time... five hours of phone time becomes a big deal... especially when phone batteries fail in much less time... so you have to plug in and recharge...

Texting and email works best for me personally. I can generally do those at night or when there free time during the day.

I especially find it more difficult when people are calling from pay phones, hotel phones with no room number or real name, home phones when they have families and need confidentiality and can only make calls to me when it works into a discrete moment for them...

 

Tyger!

tygerkink@yahoo.com

503.719.9274

http://www.tygerscent.biz

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http://www.maleescortreview.com (Tygerscent in Portland, Oregon)

http://www.rentmen.com (AAAtygerscentXXX in Portland Oregon)

http://www.men4rentnow.com (tygerscent in Portland, Oregon)

 

 

 

I'm in the camp of folks who think if you're not even willing to commit to a phone call, you're very likely not to commit to actually showing up. The majority of no-shows are people who WON'T make a phone call. So even though you may be sincere, your actions place you in the camp of people who are not, and there's no way to tell the difference.

 

If I were an escort, I wouldn't make an appointment with someone who wouldn't talk on the phone at least once. The ones I've hired probably wished I talked a little less (LOL), but I think it's important to spend 10 to 30 minutes talking and figuring out if it's a good connection for both parties. You simply can't achieve that via e-mail and texts.

 

I think e-mails are fine for verification of appointment, follow-up questions to phone call, etc. But a phone conversation really needs to be had, especially for the first encounter.

[daviddd49]

"Escorts Blow Me Off"

 

Hmmm ... I LIKE it when guys "blow me off."

Oh, wait ... you didn't mean that in a sexual sense!

My bad!