Too many regulars, not enough weeks...

[+ 7829V]

I used to have like 2 or 3 go-to guys. Lately though, I’ve found a couple more I’d actually like to see again and more often. Plus there are the one-time or “only when they’re in town” guys too.

The tricky part is some of the regulars are used to being booked every X weeks. So if I don’t reach out, they’ll message me like “hey, what’s up, wanna meet?” It’s already happened a few times 😅 I usually go with “money’s a bit tight right now,” but then a couple weeks later… boom, they’re back in my inbox 😅

I don’t really want to be super blunt and say “hey, I found a few other guys just as good, so now there’s a rotation, please wait your turn” lol.

Do you have any polite go-to excuses for this? Or is it actually better to just tell the truth? 🤔

[DMonDude]

I relate to this heavily, as someone who loves doing this but does not have the funds to do it as much as i wish i could or try new guys as much as i'd like to. I run into this issue as well every couple months whenever i start getting low or run out of my fun money. Start having to hire less or stick to my main guys or take full on hiring hiatuses till i have funds again.

I just stick with some form of i don't have it in the budget right now and i just keep letting them hit me up every month or whatever it is. I know a lot of them have some scheduled alert that reminds them to check in with regulars usually. They're just doing their due diligence. I just tell them the truth that i don't have it in the budget for right now and to either check back again later or wait for me to reach out first. It's never been a problem.

All the guys i hire know they aren't my only regular, but i don't tell them which ones i'm prioritizing at a given moment. Doesn't seem necessary or beneficial for them to know, to me. Same way i know they all have other clients who are way richer than me and book them far more often and are more "generous", but i don't want or need to know those details haha.

Edited Tuesday at 11:33 PM by DMonDude

[soloyo215]

21 minutes ago, 7829V said:

Do you have any polite go-to excuses for this? Or is it actually better to just tell the truth? 🤔

Tricky. On one hand, it's business, so one can think about it as finding or trying a different subscription service. On the other hand, many times the reason why regulars become regulars is that there's good chemistry, connection, availability, reliability or at least affordability.

In my experience when I've had to say no, I actually give a reason, not a lie. I don't necessarily give the main reason, but I prefer not to lie. No one likes rejection for another "better" provider no matter how emotionally intelligent the provider is, but I don't give excuses, I give real reasons even if what I say is not the main reason.

Edited Tuesday at 11:36 PM by soloyo215

[+ 7829V]

What I’ve done sometimes is this: if I’d normally hire X guy for 3 hours, I cut it to 2 hours and bring in a new guy for the extra hour. That actually works pretty well sometimes.

As for timing, I’d say every 1.5 months feels right for a regular, IMO. High-frequency regulars are more like every 3 weeks. “Adequate” is around every 6 weeks. Anything like 8-10 weeks doesn’t really feel regular at all.

But then there are those regulars who only come through the area once a year or so. They’re still regulars to me, because every time they’re in town, we always end up scheduling a session. Kind of like seasonal favorites that always come back 🙂

 

[Nue2thegame]

I think that a real regular is happy to see you whenever you can make it happen. For me, It’s a constantly changing roster. I’m happy when I’m trying to juggle several regulars because I know someone is going to move away, retire, or otherwise become unavailable and then I’m looking for new talent. I prefer dealing with the first problem rather than the second. Soon enough the problem will take care of itself. 

[Mark_fl]

I know we get attached to providers more than we should (and I'm as guilty as the next guy). But providers are the professionals who don't get attached to us except financially.

We shouldn't need to defend seeing other providers. We don't go to a restaurant and tell the owner how much we liked another restaurant up the street. They are just happy to see us when we make it there. Maybe they capture our email address and reach out now and then with a promotion or discount. Some even track visits and give a deal to come back and a special gift for our birthday.

If a provider wants to get my business again after an absence, he can certainly reach out, but I feel no need to make an excuse why I'm not. My finances or other hobbies aren't their business any more than they are for Hand and Stone Massage or Sam's club.

If their services aren't enough to get me to rebook often enough for them, maybe it's on them to make it worth my while.

Im not even convinced that "want to meet?" is a solicitation of business. Is that supposed to mean "do you want to pay me to see you?"

E"You haven't reached out in a while. Is everything ok?" seems more like an invitation to book rather than an offer to hang out.

[+ PhileasFogg]

These guys know the game, there’s nothing to hide.  I don’t think they need the details.  It’s sufficient to say “I look forward to our next visit.  I have a lot going on but can we shoot for something the week of xxxx”

Edited 16 hours ago by PhileasFogg