Thomhasnt Posted March 30, 2023 Share Posted March 30, 2023 HI: So relative newbie here, who has just discovered massage. Is there a general definition for "Sensual" vs. "Erotic" massage? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted March 30, 2023 Share Posted March 30, 2023 (edited) 8 minutes ago, Thomhasnt said: HI: So relative newbie here, who has just discovered massage. Is there a general definition for "Sensual" vs. "Erotic" massage? Often discussed. Never agreed upon. Many threads on the subject and everyone has a different opinion. Edited March 30, 2023 by pubic_assistance + azdr0710, + Drew Collins, + ButchAtl and 5 others 3 4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamie21 Posted March 30, 2023 Share Posted March 30, 2023 The global organisation that regulates the erotic / sensual massage industry: The Regulatory Union of Bodyworking has a sub committee (The Terms Unifying Group) that is set up to handle issues like this. At the last meeting of the RUB&TUG group (as it is known for short) the members couldn’t reach agreement on what the difference was between a sensual massage and an erotic massage. The minutes show that the meeting ended unhappily although it was agreed that in that situation the meeting could not have been classified as sensual or erotic. BonVivant, MikeBiDude, Cruiser7 and 26 others 1 3 25 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
56harrisond Posted March 30, 2023 Share Posted March 30, 2023 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simon Suraci Posted March 30, 2023 Share Posted March 30, 2023 There is no clear-cut, definitive answer to this; it’s different for everyone. I recommend asking for exactly what you want and see who provides it. Or simply hire any of the vetted masseurs with positive comments from other clients posted here on company of men and see what they do. Evaluate a few and keep hiring the providers who best fit your needs. sider 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted March 30, 2023 Share Posted March 30, 2023 2 hours ago, Thomhasnt said: Is there a general definition for "Sensual" vs. "Erotic" massage? It's a giant gray area with no agreed upon LINE between the possibilities. In general a massage is just a massage if it's THERAPEUTIC SENSUAL can ( but does not NEED to ) include a bit of more personal touch therapy, maybe nudity, some titillating teasing and even the possibility of a happy ending, but NONE of that is guaranteed under this definiton. EROTIC for most people does mean there is more likely nudity, more personal touching and the expectation of an orgasm, but again this is different from provider to provider, so everything needs to be navigated. Most important thing to remember is that a masseur is NOT an escort. So you should not ASSUME that sexual favors are part of anyone repertoire, until you discover that your masseur IS ACTUALLY AN ESCORT advertising as a masseur. It's all very confusing and unfortunately NO ONE can tell you for sure where the lines are drawn. You just need to start exploring and be happy when you manage to cross a line somewhere and enjoy the results. Good luck.🥳 jeezifonly, Vulgarii, + FrankR and 2 others 2 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jeezifonly Posted March 30, 2023 Share Posted March 30, 2023 Think of “massage” as a point on a scale: 0 = fully clothed chair massage at the mall 10 = fully nude, oral, intercourse, release and cuddling. 7 and above is an Escort Service. Simon Suraci, + ButchAtl, + glennnnn and 3 others 3 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vulgarii Posted March 30, 2023 Share Posted March 30, 2023 (edited) I've asked clients to describe what they want as an erotic and sensual massage because everyone has a different expectation, and I always get a different answer. What I find odd, is that nowadays I'm hearing directly from new clients that sensual means just a slow, soft Swedish massage. To me, a happy ending is sexual. Anything stimulating the genitals whether or not an orgasm happens, is sexual. It is sensual and it is erotic. I love it when potential clients want to argue that a happy ending isn't sexual or erotic. Whatever. Edited March 30, 2023 by Vulgarii + glennnnn, Jamie21, + azdr0710 and 1 other 2 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamie21 Posted March 30, 2023 Share Posted March 30, 2023 This has been debated at length previously (I can’t find the other discussions though!). Hence my tongue in cheek earlier post about the RUB&TUG group. I think the best thing to do is ask your masseur what they include in the massage. I describe myself as a sensual masseur but judging by some of the comments on here I’m an escort. I tend to have a wide definition of what is included in my massage. The crucial thing though is that my service is centred around my client receiving a proper massage. Lots of other escort type activities happen but there’s always a massage. I’m not bothered about being described as an escort but I think for some clients it’s preferable for them to be visiting a masseur rather than an escort. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thomhasnt Posted March 31, 2023 Author Share Posted March 31, 2023 Gentlemen: Thank you for not raking me over the coals for not finding the threads that had more of this discussion. I appreciate the humor and frankness in your responses. I want a massage that is fully therapeutic, but love the building of sexual tension as well. Wasn't sure if there was a generally accepted line between the two. Thanks! 3 hours ago, pubic_assistance said: Often discussed. Never agreed upon. Many threads on the subject and everyone has a different opinion. 2 hours ago, Simon Suraci said: There is no clear-cut, definitive answer to this; it’s different for everyone. I recommend asking for exactly what you want and see who provides it. Or simply hire any of the vetted masseurs with positive comments from other clients posted here on company of men and see what they do. Evaluate a few and keep hiring the providers who best fit your needs. 1 hour ago, pubic_assistance said: It's a giant gray area with no agreed upon LINE between the possibilities. In general a massage is just a massage if it's THERAPEUTIC SENSUAL can ( but does not NEED to ) include a bit of more personal touch therapy, maybe nudity, some titillating teasing and even the possibility of a happy ending, but NONE of that is guaranteed under this definiton. EROTIC for most people does mean there is more likely nudity, more personal touching and the expectation of an orgasm, but again this is different from provider to provider, so everything needs to be navigated. Most important thing to remember is that a masseur is NOT an escort. So you should not ASSUME that sexual favors are part of anyone repertoire, until you discover that your masseur IS ACTUALLY AN ESCORT advertising as a masseur. It's all very confusing and unfortunately NO ONE can tell you for sure where the lines are drawn. You just need to start exploring and be happy when you manage to cross a line somewhere and enjoy the results. Good luck.🥳 1 hour ago, Vulgarii said: I've asked clients to describe what they want as an erotic and sensual massage because everyone has a different expectation, and I always get a different answer. What I find odd, is that nowadays I'm hearing directly from new clients that sensual means just a slow, soft Swedish massage. To me, a happy ending is sexual. Anything stimulating the genitals whether or not an orgasm happens, is sexual. It is sensual and it is erotic. I love it when potential clients want to argue that a happy ending isn't sexual or erotic. Whatever. 59 minutes ago, Jamie21 said: This has been debated at length previously (I can’t find the other discussions though!). Hence my tongue in cheek earlier post about the RUB&TUG group. I think the best thing to do is ask your masseur what they include in the massage. I describe myself as a sensual masseur but judging by some of the comments on here I’m an escort. I tend to have a wide definition of what is included in my massage. The crucial thing though is that my service is centred around my client receiving a proper massage. Lots of other escort type activities happen but there’s always a massage. I’m not bothered about being described as an escort but I think for some clients it’s preferable for them to be visiting a masseur rather than an escort. Jamie21 and Simon Suraci 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thomhasnt Posted March 31, 2023 Author Share Posted March 31, 2023 12 hours ago, Jamie21 said: SNIP I tend to have a wide definition of what is included in my massage. The crucial thing though is that my service is centred around my client receiving a proper massage. Lots of other escort type activities happen but there’s always a massage. I have visited one masseur several times. He has always delivered a proper massage, which is my primary motive in hiring him. Over time, as he's sensed I'm more comfortable I guess, it's progressed in levels. First time he started shirtless, but lost his shorts midway through and rimmed me a bit, some MT with a HE. Second time, he started nude more MT. Third time, I blew him and there was a little bit of kissing. Last visit progressed to some penetration. HE always seems to be midway through and then, he finishes the massage. Clearly, we're in erotic massage territory. Perhaps, according to some, we've always been. He seems to enjoy the experience, too. Or he's an excellent actor. So, I was not really surprised to discover that he has an escort ad on rentmen. Hopefully this not inappropriate for this forum. + The Big Guy, + FrankR, + Drew Collins and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vulgarii Posted April 1, 2023 Share Posted April 1, 2023 On 3/30/2023 at 5:48 PM, Thomhasnt said: Gentlemen: Thank you for not raking me over the coals for not finding the threads that had more of this discussion. I appreciate the humor and frankness in your responses. I want a massage that is fully therapeutic, but love the building of sexual tension as well. Wasn't sure if there was a generally accepted line between the two. Thanks! What sucks about this line of work if you don't advertise yourself as erotic and if the client doesn't ask any questions beforehand, is that you don't know what the client wants. You don't know his real intentions and some just want a therapeutic massage and that's all. No genital stimulation whatsoever. I think a HE can be included in a therapeutic massage. Whether I want to do it or not is another story. I love the tension. I love that moment when I see that an attractive client starts to relax his hands and let his fingers wander. He's in my realm, and that's nicer than saying he's in my trap and I'm going to have fun and get paid for it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thomhasnt Posted April 1, 2023 Author Share Posted April 1, 2023 8 hours ago, Vulgarii said: What sucks about this line of work if you don't advertise yourself as erotic and if the client doesn't ask any questions beforehand, is that you don't know what the client wants. You don't know his real intentions and some just want a therapeutic massage and that's all. No genital stimulation whatsoever. I think a HE can be included in a therapeutic massage. Whether I want to do it or not is another story. I love the tension. I love that moment when I see that an attractive client starts to relax his hands and let his fingers wander. He's in my realm, and that's nicer than saying he's in my trap and I'm going to have fun and get paid for it. I've learned to ask questions about draping and nudity. Do you mind if I touch you? I'm there for a massage, but love the sensual/erotic components, too. If he can enjoy himself, that's a bonus. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted April 1, 2023 Share Posted April 1, 2023 5 minutes ago, Thomhasnt said: Do you mind if I touch you? This is just my opinion...but to ME.. the minute you reciprocate, by touching your provider, you've gone beyond massage services and entered into escorting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thomhasnt Posted April 1, 2023 Author Share Posted April 1, 2023 6 minutes ago, pubic_assistance said: This is just my opinion...but to ME.. the minute you reciprocate, by touching your provider, you've gone beyond massage services and entered into escorting. Hence the ask. No is an acceptable answer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted April 1, 2023 Share Posted April 1, 2023 4 minutes ago, Thomhasnt said: No is an acceptable answer. I've literally had masseurs take my hand and put it on their hard dick. Permission granted. 😉 56harrisond, + ButchAtl, Redwine56 and 3 others 4 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamie21 Posted April 2, 2023 Share Posted April 2, 2023 I tell clients they can touch me as much or as little as they like. It’s their massage, if they like to touch me that’s fine. Some enjoy the touch, some explore, some just don’t touch atall and some want to suck me. It’s all fine by me. It’s very difficult for parts of me not to touch my client at times during the massage. If I’m naked, which most clients prefer (at least for part of the massage) then if standing at the side then my cock is bound to brush my client’s hand. As for the line between massage and escorting it’s not really a concern for me but of course I work in a country where the latter is legal (within certain circumstances) so it’s just a question of whether I’m fine to be doing escort work, which I am! I think it’s a fabulous way to work. If I worked somewhere where escorting or sex work was against the law then I’d be careful to stay the right side of the line. + APPLE1, Thomhasnt, pubic_assistance and 2 others 4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vulgarii Posted April 3, 2023 Share Posted April 3, 2023 On 4/1/2023 at 7:26 AM, Thomhasnt said: I've learned to ask questions about draping and nudity. Do you mind if I touch you? I'm there for a massage, but love the sensual/erotic components, too. If he can enjoy himself, that's a bonus. "Do you mind if I touch you?" is a great way to break the ice but how far the touching goes depends on the masseur. Thomhasnt and + ButchAtl 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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