Dear bottoms, how do dicks really feel like?

[socurious]

I'm back!!

But okay, maybe a weird question and perhaps repetitive. I wanted to be more specific...

According to what I usually read online anal sex supposedly feels like pooping in reverse (this is at least like many people describe it). But how the penis inside really feels like? Does it feel soft or hard? Is it hurtful if it's too hard? Softer is better? Length or girth? Warmth feels good? 

The thing is that I've never bottomed and wish to. You can say I'm still not prepared mentally and neither physically (procrastination is something I need to work on). Dildos kinda feel weird in ocassions and thrusting them in and out to emulate sex feels like burning my hole. The sensation is still interesting but to be honest I'm always scared to do the whole act if you know what I mean. I just end up with the small-size dildo inside me for like an hour laid down on my back while I jerk off. Having something in my butt (plugs especially) really turns me on and makes me have stronger orgasms. But like I said, I've never tried the real thing and emulating the in and out act feels hurtful at times. It's likely that I need to stretch myself more? For the record I practice once every two weeks and sometimes only once every one or two months. A lot of people tell me dildos often hurt compared to flesh. I was just wondering. Thanks in advance. 

 

Edited October 27, 2022 by nycboi

[Thomas_Belgium]

Hi NYCboi,

There's some dildos that have a more realistic feeling, although they are, in most cases, expensive. Nevertheless, I recommend always to use condoms with dildos & with a real penis also use condoms. If you practice, I would use a realistic size dildo. In my opinion it's better to throw all plugs & unrealistic large dildos. As a top (I was versaltile until some years ago) I beg you to don't ruin your butt with large toys. 

A good penis is hard, not soft. A good erection has to be as hard as a dildo. If you put your realistic dildo in warm water (not too hot) you should have to get the same feeling. The difference between a dildo an a real penis is the guy, the way you feel his body & only when you're on PrEP or in a safe relationship, feel is cum inside you. All the good stuff in the sperm get in your blood stream & some guys say they can feel that.

[+ DynamicUno]

It's not a weird question, but it's very hard to give anything more than a general answer.  It's highly dependent on the guy who is topping you.  Skill, in my experience, is more important than size, but a big guy is going to feel a lot different than an average guy.

You've taken dildos before, so penetration isn't going to be new for you, but a real cock does feel different because flesh can flex and squeeze in ways silicone won't. 

The best advice is find a guy who you can trust to be your first, it's important for him to be patient and responsive to you when he pushes in.  Use plenty of lube and take it slow.  It is probably going to hurt at first since you're inexperienced, but a good top will let you get used to him inside you before he starts thrusting.

Size is mostly going to affect how "full" you feel.  Guys with longer cocks can actually feel better since they're less likely to accidently pull out all the way and re-enter unexpectedly (that can hurt).  Guys with thicker cocks may be a bigger challenge, even if they're not particularly long.  If they're curved they can feel different than a guy with a straight cock, just because they may hit your prostate differently.  

You should probably give more thought to who would be your first top.  It's probably best to avoid a first time hookup, find someone who you can take your time with.  

[+ keroscenefire]

Even now that I am a more experienced bottom, I would say that anal still hurts some. It almost always hurts for me right at the first penetration I think because my sphincter has to relax and get used to the dick. After that it's more pleasure than pain though sometimes it can still hurt a bit...almost in a pleasurable way actually.

The biggest difference between an actual dick and a dildo is the human being involved. I actually really enjoy seeing someone enjoying my hole and love watching their sexy body on top of mine and hearing their moans. The way another guy fucks is also more unpredictable and not controlled by you, so that makes it hotter than a dildo that you are controlling. 

[MscleLovr]

What an interesting question @nycboi As I’m a top only, I found the responses illuminating 

[socurious]

34 minutes ago, DynamicUno said:

It's not a weird question, but it's very hard to give anything more than a general answer.  It's highly dependent on the guy who is topping you.  Skill, in my experience, is more important than size, but a big guy is going to feel a lot different than an average guy.

You've taken dildos before, so penetration isn't going to be new for you, but a real cock does feel different because flesh can flex and squeeze in ways silicone won't. 

The best advice is find a guy who you can trust to be your first, it's important for him to be patient and responsive to you when he pushes in.  Use plenty of lube and take it slow.  It is probably going to hurt at first since you're inexperienced, but a good top will let you get used to him inside you before he starts thrusting.

Size is mostly going to affect how "full" you feel.  Guys with longer cocks can actually feel better since they're less likely to accidently pull out all the way and re-enter unexpectedly (that can hurt).  Guys with thicker cocks may be a bigger challenge, even if they're not particularly long.  If they're curved they can feel different than a guy with a straight cock, just because they may hit your prostate differently.  

You should probably give more thought to who would be your first top.  It's probably best to avoid a first time hookup, find someone who you can take your time with.  

Thanks for your input!

I do have two realistic dildos that costed me 70 dollars each. I don't know if that's considered expensive though. One is a very large one (like a XXL size) and the other one quite small (for beginners I guess). The smaller one is the one I always practice with. I haven't tried the extra big one yet because I'm simply too tight. It doesn't fit in my butthole.

I truly want to get more stretched. There are several hot guys I know (with big cocks) I want to bottom for. It's my all-time fantasy and don't want to miss that.

[Rand]

I have never felt good with any dildo, regardless of price/size/realness etc. I even tried the ones with self-warming function and artificial skin that supposed to feel like real. Nope, not the same. Self-administered friction adds to this awkward feelings.

The real dick feels better because it's hard and flexible at the same time, warm and smooth. Silicone creates more friction (regardless how smooth it is + lube) and it gives this artificial sensation. Plus, real dick is attached to a living, breathing, passionate person. That means more that dick itself! Waaaay more.

Go for the real thing. Start with average size (or average+) and work your way up. Don't go for monster dick as a novice. It can end up NOT the way you imagined and it'll ruin your anticipations/expectations. I noticed, you just need to find the right dick for YOU. It's hard to explain but you'll feel it that it's just the right size.

As of the feeling... it feels awesome! Absolutely f...ing awesome! There's no comparing with anything else. I have much stronger mind-blowing orgasms when I bottom. I also feel "fulfilled" in both meanings of that word 😝 (I know, sounds silly). This warm feeling, I'm in the clouds and I don't want it to stop. Ever. Or... I can take a break and go in again.

You should try.

[DBWEHO]

I really wanted to bottom, but I was having trouble, here's my advise, if you do too.

Get yourself a set of anal stretchers. you can get them on Amazon, and a bottle of lube. They're made of hard plastic but only a few inches long (so they prepare you for width, rather than depth) , and go from teeny tiny to massive. Work on them slowly.

Then get a nice, avenged size dildo, and practice with that.

Think about getting one of those anal vibrating toys, there's a company galled Giddy that makes a great one (but don't get a cheap one) that should give you a good taste of prostate pleasure.

Then go get fucked, have the guy take his time, especially if he's big,  it's nothing like a dildo. You may not love it the first time or two, but it's worth trying to get used to. If you hate it... stop.

[jeezifonly]

You need neither advice nor permission here. Good luck, and you’ll probably wind up thinking “why did I wait??”

[56harrisond]

18 hours ago, keroscenefire said:

Even now that I am a more experienced bottom, I would say that anal still hurts some. It almost always hurts for me right at the first penetration I think because my sphincter has to relax and get used to the dick. After that it's more pleasure than pain though sometimes it can still hurt a bit...almost in a pleasurable way actually.

1000% Facts right here👆

The position you're in makes a big difference too. Some positions give the bottom more/less control, or allow for maximum depth for balls deep fun.

[maninsoma]

A perspective from someone who first bottomed just after his 18th birthday and has been mostly a bottom since then:

It's mostly mental.  Does the dick feel good inside?  To me, yes.  It's difficult to describe what the actual physical sensation is like.  As I think about it, most words to describe it just don't quite convey the sensation.  Pressure.  Fullness.  Definitely the incredible feeling of pleasure if someone is able to stimulate my prostate, but that doesn't always happen.  I think for me the main pleasure is the sense of connection.  I just enjoy having someone inside of me.

I've never understood the discussions about how it takes time to "train" oneself to like it.  Or that it takes an incredible amount of lube.  My first time bottoming (with my first real boyfriend when we were both 18), we didn't have any lubricant other than spit but we both wanted to try it so we did.  I enjoyed it.  A lot of the time he fucked me after that, we didn't use lube.  I was just hot for him and had no problem relaxing and letting him in.  Surely since then I've had partners where lube was required, particularly when using condoms because that changes the feeling of friction for the bottom.  And guys with very large cocks definitely need to have skill in terms of knowing how to enter at the right speed.  Attempt to thrust too fast too soon and I will feel pain, not pleasure.  With the right foreplay, though, even a big dick can enter me with me feeling like I'm finally getting what I've been waiting for.  A rush of pleasure, with me thinking, "ahhhhh."

[+ friendofsheila]

On 10/27/2022 at 9:02 AM, DynamicUno said:

It's not a weird question, but it's very hard to give anything more than a general answer.  It's highly dependent on the guy who is topping you.  Skill, in my experience, is more important than size, but a big guy is going to feel a lot different than an average guy.

You should probably give more thought to who would be your first top.  It's probably best to avoid a first time hookup, find someone who you can take your time with.  

Best answer.

Edited October 28, 2022 by friendofsheila