Apologies

[jeezifonly]

PUBLIC APOLOGIES

I just watched a short doc on apologies, of many different kinds. (Explained on Netflix)

I want to hear your views about our (American) increasing appetite in the zeitgeist, mostly on SM or TV, to hear / read public words of regret when a public figure has done something in their past (recent or ancient) that was by today’s standard, offensive or thoughtless or racist or misogynistic or “too soon” or too ___phobic… 

Do you stand up for all objectionable behavior you hear about, or does it tend to be prioritized by the personal insult to your own demographic/race/gender/ sexuality ? What number of years is too long to care?

Do you even look for the celebrity apologies?

The pundits? The politicians? The star CEO’s?
 

Do these public apologies work? Does timing count more than sincerity? 

Who do you think succeeded with a public apology? Who’s would you still care to hear?

Who blew it?

Who just…. moved on ?

I’m sorry… I just had to ask.

Please share…

 

 

[+ nycman]

It’s just a younger generation trying to out maneuver an older one. 

It’s happened since the age of time. Every generation is more "woke"
than the one before. Nothing new. Well, until we get "too woke" and 
then war breaks out, and then we all get really unwoke. Rinse. Repeat. 

Asking people to apologize or beg forgiveness for things that happened 
decades ago is stupid in my book. There’s a reason we have a statue of
limitations. The fog of time is virtually impossible to see through clearly
and it certainly makes fair judgements about any actions just about out of
the question.

I’m not saying there won’t be judgements…they just won’t be fair. 

Edited September 12, 2021 by nycman

[MscleLovr]

I find most public apologies, especially for historic transgressions, to be insincere.
 

Just as individuals going into rehab seems to be a part of public redemption, insincerity seems to me to be the hallmark of many statements. I don’t care whether they are film stars seeking treatment for addiction, or greedy lawyers charged with misappropriation of funds, or Meghan Markle complaining of not being accorded the status and public funding she demanded - I find all these individuals tedious. 

[+ Pensant]

When politicians and celebs offer apologies for some comment, it’s usually to preserve their income streams and generally not sincere. I just snort when I read about them.

[gallahadesquire]

An interesting article by a student of the field of apology

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/199501/go-ahead-say-youre-sorry

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/199501/go-ahead-say-youre-sorry

 

[+ purplekow]

There are things I truly regret but I do not feel the need to apologize for them.  Regret and remorse do not have to be tied together.  However, if I discovered something I did caused someone undo pain, I would offer them a sincere apology and try to repay them in some way.  

[jeezifonly]

1 hour ago, purplekow said:

There are things I truly regret but I do not feel the need to apologize for them.  Regret and remorse do not have to be tied together.  However, if I discovered something I did caused someone undo pain, I would offer them a sincere apology and try to repay them in some way.  

Thx @purplekow

How do you feel about public apologies from people you probably don’t know, to a larger group of people who you also may not know, over a transgression that you were only made aware of once the apology was asked/demanded? 

[+ purplekow]

4 hours ago, jeezifonly said:

Thx @purplekow

How do you feel about public apologies from people you probably don’t know, to a larger group of people who you also may not know, over a transgression that you were only made aware of once the apology was asked/demanded? 

Public apologies of this type should start with a phrase to the effect.  I am truly sorry that a transgression so many years ago could still be causing pain today.  So to those who truly feel offended by those words uttered by a person I no long am, the remnant of him, which resides only in my memories, apologizes.  However, as I am no longer that person, any apology I would offer will ring out as hollow and insincere and as a result, it will not be forthcoming.   That being said, I am willing to do penance for that young and foolish person who had young and foolish ideas and so I will be doing a proportionate action not in compensation but rather in celebration of having grown older and wiser.  

Clearly some actions are more regrettable than others and if the act rose to the level of a crime, then that crime needs to be handled by the legal system.   If that is the case, then I would expect the apology to include the promise to help authorities rectify this injustice.  

Edited September 13, 2021 by purplekow

[jeezifonly]

4 minutes ago, purplekow said:

Public apologies of this type should start with a phrase to the effect.  I am truly sorry that a transgression so many years ago could still be causing pain today.  So to those who truly feel offended by those words uttered by a person I no long am, the remnant of him, which resides only in my memories, apologizes.  However, as I am no longer that person, any apology I would offer will ring out as hollow and insincere and as a result, it will not be forthcoming.  

Thx. You’re a PR pro!

[+ purplekow]

10 minutes ago, jeezifonly said:

Thx. You’re a PR pro!

I am not doing public relations but as most if not all of these kinds of apologies come off as insincere and forced, recognizing that  and then refusing tp participate in the matter further is what I would like to hear.  

In other words, someone who would say. Yeah I did it.   That was a long time ago.  I no longer think that way.  Let us not give this old news any more weight than it deserves.  I have moved on from then and suggest that others do too.  

Edited September 13, 2021 by purplekow

[Talented]

I don’t trust most public apologies. They always come off as so fake! It’s more often than not, just to save their own image. 

[jtwalker]

Public apologies are useless propaganda.

Private apologies to a friend or loved one are a super-power.  You can destroy an argument in seconds by admitting where you are wrong.  I apologize as quickly as I possibly can.