Young man needs help

[Walker1]

Birth mom CANNOT co-sign the loan

Is that a rule? I am not in that line of work and my kids too young for college. But from my circle fof riends, I know some parents who have co-signed student loans for their children. Now obviously I haven't seen the documents, but that is what they told me. One is crying because her daughter finished college and moved back home and refusing to get a job.

[+ Pensant]

He seems like an airhead and he wants to study English at Fairfield University, which is an overpriced college that few outside of the Tri-State area have ever heard of. I’m surprised that I fell for this click-bait.

 

That said, he could probably do well as a provider! Kinda ditzy cute.

[LookingAround]

Reeks of a scam.

[MassageAdam]

This article moved me. Upon finding out his two sons were gay, the father has withdrawn all financial support for the HS graduate son to go to University. The article follows and there is a link to a GoFundMe page. Please read and help if able.

https://instinctmagazine.com/exclusive-father-refuses-to-pay-for-his-sons-college-because-of-his-sexuality/

I worked a full time job to get through my undergraduate and graduate degree and then again for nursing school. I had to take out some loans as well. I don't understand people looking for a free ride. Get a job dude, I don't feel sorry for you. Oh and I didn't have my family's support either.

[KeepItReal]

There are a lot of young people in the LGBT community that are in need. Some in greater need - to get off the streets; a decent meal and clothing. I feel sorry for anyone that is disenfranchised because of sexual orientation, but a college education is way down the list when you can't even take care of the basic necessities of life. Feel like doing a good deed? Donate to the Ali Forney Center in NYC that helps tons of young people get off the streets - most of these young people are not even from NYC; they flock to the city from all over the country, looking to make a living of any sort.

[instudiocity]

Is that a rule? I am not in that line of work and my kids too young for college. But from my circle fof riends, I know some parents who have co-signed student loans for their children. Now obviously I haven't seen the documents, but that is what they told me. One is crying because her daughter finished college and moved back home and refusing to get a job.

Read the article... the kid says mom can't co-sign.

[+ bigjoey]

Is that a rule? I am not in that line of work and my kids too young for college. But from my circle fof riends, I know some parents who have co-signed student loans for their children. Now obviously I haven't seen the documents, but that is what they told me. One is crying because her daughter finished college and moved back home and refusing to get a job.

 

No worry. AOC wants to have a guaranteed minimum income even for those UNWILLING to work:):)

 

If I was the parent and my daughter with her college degree in hand REFUSED to get a job, I would:

1- give her a list of house chores in exchange for her room and board. After a few weeks of laundry, cleaning, cooking, yard work, etc I think the young precious daughter might decide being a receptionist in a dental office was superior to house work.

2-sign her up at SeekingArrangements.com in hopes of unloading her on some nice 70 year old male (assuming she is straight).

:):)

[marylander1940]

No worry. AOC wants to have a guaranteed minimum income even for those UNWILLING to work:):)

 

If I was the parent and my daughter with her college degree in hand REFUSED to get a job, I would:

1- give her a list of house chores in exchange for her room and board. After a few weeks of laundry, cleaning, cooking, yard work, etc I think the young precious daughter might decide being a receptionist in a dental office was superior to house work.

2-sign her up at SeekingArrangements.com in hopes of unloading her on some nice 70 year old male (assuming she is straight).

:):)

 

Obviously you need to bring AOC into the conversation...

 

Btw, how old were you when you came out to your parents?

 

Do you know that life (rent/college) is more expensive and competitive now a days?

[Walker1]

Read the article... the kid says mom can't co-sign.

I did read the whole article. IT does not say mom cannot co-sign because it is not allowed. The kid says mom has taken on responsibility for him and his brother and so cannot co-sign. Which is basically what I said-she does not want to co-sign -not cannot.

 

Taking responsibility does not mean you can't co-sign a loan. You only pay if the kid defaults. Dad is saying he will help if it is state college or if the same amount but Harvard or an Ivy League and a good major-which is a far more reasonable position. Now the gay conversion theory of dad is stupid. Plus dad and step mom have four other younger siblings/half-siblings living with them. Why do you think they cna afford to co-sign a 100k+ loan for one out of 6 kids. Then they have their own retirement to worry about.

[marylander1940]

I am not sure college admissions are more competitive now than 50 years, especially you were not a legacy student. Yes ivy league universities are more competitive & the best public universities like Virginia and Michigan.

 

More people are going to college now compared to even 20 years ago... life is more competitive.

[+ purplekow]

I mentioned in another forum that I played Art Carney's role of Ed Norton in a school play. What I did not write is my teacher selected me to be in charge of the play. She believed I should try harder, and not be so shy. I selected The Honeymooners because of the Ed Norton role.

 

Because I was only in the sixth grade, I was shocked at how well it was received by everyone.

 

School is not just about a job after graduation. If so, the student in question might end up with a job he hates.

Just a coincidence, for medical school graduation show, we did a version of the Honeymooners as well. Perhaps we can do a version in Palm Springs. I did have the lead and even did a song. It went over extremely well as did many of the other skits.

[+ purplekow]

Just a coincidence, for medical school graduation show, we did a version of the Honeymooners as well. Perhaps we can do a version in Palm Springs. I did have the lead and even did a song. It went over extremely well as did many of the other skits.

You know Ralph and Ed decide that perhaps they need to expand their sexual horizons as Trixie and Alice do not even want to sleep in the same bed with their husbands. They start to put together a Grindr profile for the both of them. Hilarity ensues.

[+ WilliamM]

Just a coincidence, for medical school graduation show, we did a version of the Honeymooners as well. Perhaps we can do a version in Palm Springs. I did have the lead and even did a song. It went over extremely well as did many of the other skits.

 

I was very surprised the sixth grade teacher remembered me over 50 years later when I visited her assisted living home. She said, "yes, I asked you to do the school play." Apparently the staff did not like her. By then I had not lived in Massachusetts since 1970. As to a song, ok, we were in the sixth grade.

I had to think fast when the June Taylor dancers bombed. (smile).

[+ WilliamM]

I did read the whole article. IT does not say mom cannot co-sign because it is not allowed. The kid says mom has taken on responsibility for him and his brother and so cannot co-sign. Which is basically what I said-she does not want to co-sign -not cannot.

 

Taking responsibility does not mean you can't co-sign a loan. You only pay if the kid defaults. Dad is saying he will help if it is state college or if the same amount but Harvard or an Ivy League and a good major-which is a far more reasonable position. Now the gay conversion theory of dad is stupid. Plus dad and step mom have four other younger siblings/half-siblings living with them. Why do you think they cna afford to co-sign a 100k+ loan for one out of 6 kids. Then they have their own retirement to worry about.

 

 

I do not necessarily agree with his choice of that university. However, he should at least have the first year with the major of his choice and then decide based on grades.

 

Rather than calling him a lard ass or air head, give the student some credit.

[+ WilliamM]

I worked a full time job to get through my undergraduate and graduate degree and then again for nursing school. I had to take out some loans as well. I don't understand people looking for a free ride. Get a job dude, I don't feel sorry for you. Oh and I didn't have my family's support either.

.I always had jobs in high school and in the summers, but I only lasted until November with a even part time job in college

 

My Catholic university required six courses a semester. (Boston College in Chestnut Hill, MA)

[Walker1]

I do not necessarily agree with his choice of that university. However, he should at least have the first year with the major of his choice and then decide based on grades.

 

Rather than calling him a lard ass or air head, give the student some credit.

Nope I am not calling him a lard ass or airhead. I am saying there are two different issues. Dad is a bigot and so is step mom -they genuinely believe being gay is a "learned" behavior and conversion therapy can "cure" you of being gay. I feel for the kid there.

 

However the dad/step mom is saying they are willing to pay for state school or if this rate then ivy league school. But not for this major in this not famous school. His mom is not willing to co-sign, so he uses this to get money from the public -which actually makes him smart-free money.

 

Just saying as someone with more than one kid-you can't give away everything because one kid wants to do something. You have to think of the others and your own retirement. Now if the kid got into a top medical school or some degree in a very lucrative career in a very good school-ok can go the extra mile. But otherwise just an ok school with an ok major for 275k? Nope. The dad and stepmom say they have 4 of their own kids at home-so they have to support them too.

 

It is sad on the bigotry -but people come around especially when their own kid is gay. Some don't-but many parents do. My family came around and all accept me and my kids. But this is just not going to help-well for the kid maybe if he gets his GoFund me .

 

Question -for gufund me -do you pay taxes?

[MassageAdam]

Obviously you need to bring AOC into the conversation...

 

Btw, how old were you when you came out to your parents?

 

Do you know that life (rent/college) is more expensive and competitive now a days?

Community College is a lot cheaper.. people think they need to start out at a big university

.I always had jobs in high school and in the summers, but I only lasted until November with a even part time job in college

 

My Catholic university required six courses a semester. (Boston College in Chestnut Hill, MA)

Well, I'm just saying he doesn't need to go there. he can work full time and go to school part time, he can go to a community college and then transfer, or he can work for Starbucks and get Arizona State University online program for free (I actually know several baristas who did that, got their degree and moved on to better things). There are ways to make your college education happen without having everyone else pay for it. That's all I'm saying.

[+ WilliamM]

Well, I'm just saying he doesn't need to go there. he can work full time and go to school part time, he can go to a community college and then transfer, or he can work for Starbucks and get Arizona State University online program for free (I actually know several baristas who did that, got their degree and moved on to better things). There are ways to make your college education happen without having everyone else pay for it. That's all I'm saying.

 

Attending community college and transferring is a bad idea unless it is a college or university that is very, very good in his major.

 

Arizona State on line is even a worse idea, especially for an English major. Literature is far better discussed in person in class rather than on line.

[MassageAdam]

Attending community college and transferring is a bad idea unless it is a college or university that is very, very good in his major.

 

Arizona State on line is even a worse idea, especially for an English major. Literature is far better discussed in person in class rather than on line.

dude, I was a high school counselor before I was a nurse and you are way off base with the community college comment. Maybe he should look into a degree that he can earn money in and not spend a couple hundred thousand dollars on a pretty worthless degree.

[+ WilliamM]

I audited courses at the University of Pennsylvania for ten years, and I talked to the students. It is very difficult to start at a college or university in junior year. You can do it successfully if you are mature for your age and quite determined.

[+ WilliamM]

dude, I was a high school counselor before I was a nurse and you are way off base with the community college comment. Maybe he should look into a degree that he can earn money in and not spend a couple hundred thousand dollars on a pretty worthless degree.

 

Degrees are hardly worthless even if it is a major that does not immediately lead to a job, especially if you are an English major. Writing well is an art.

I am not a good writer, so am very familiar with my limitation.

[LookingAround]

Rather than calling him a lard ass or air head, give the student some credit.

 

Happy to give him some credit. But not money.

[+ bashful]

My parents couldn't afford to put any of us kids through college. Fortunately, college was a lot less expensive in the late 70's, but still not easy. I had jobs the whole time.

 

My first summer home, had a job in an auto parts factory, maybe $4 an hour. Late in the summer, I suddenly got a call about my application at another auto parts factory that paid $8, or $9 per hour. A lot of money then. I got the job, and had to join the UAW.

 

Since it was so late in the summer, I was still behind in cash. I worked the factory job on the afternoon shift, and got a job at a 24 hour convenience store working the midnight shift. Didn't get a lot of sleep, and lost a lot of weight.

 

All my subsequent summers, I worked the UAW job. They always welcomed me back. Banked a lot of cash each summer. When back at college, I worked two days a week at a convenience store near campus for spending money. I think my total college loan debt came to only about two maybe three grand.

 

I don't see it being possible today given the extremely high cost of education today.

[MassageAdam]

I audited courses at the University of Pennsylvania for ten years, and I talked to the students. It is very difficult to start at a college or university in junior year. You can do it successfully if you are mature for your age and quite determined.

Well, that is not the norm... let me inform you.

[+ FreshFluff]

dude, I was a high school counselor before I was a nurse and you are way off base with the community college comment. Maybe he should look into a degree that he can earn money in and not spend a couple hundred thousand dollars on a pretty worthless degree.

 

If a CC student excels, he can transfer to a good or even great 4 year public. Many start out planning to do so. But given the often poor advising and other factors, it’s very easy to lose focus and drop out instead.