Smokey

How to say "no" nicely and forcefully.  

Wow! That didn't hit me until my 80s.

Thank you all for your great suggestions. As expected, we were only able to cover a fraction of the topics I would have liked to during the limited time we had. While I sent a long list of questions and subtopics to inspire the hosts, it was ultimately up to them to select what they most wanted to ask. As always, you are all welcome to “ask me anything” any time.
I realized after listening that I mispoke when I plugged this site, saying THE company of men dot org (when it’s simply companyofmen.org). Sorry about that. I know that it’s the latter but goofed up in the moment. People will find us here, I’m sure. A quick google and it will pop up, with or without the “The”.
Here is the podcast for any who are interested in listening to the interview. The interview portion starts right at 16:00 minutes in, if you want to skip their intro stuff, news stuff, etc.
Gayish: 463 Sex Workers (w/ Simon Suraci)
PODCASTS.APPLE.COM Podcast Episode · Gayish Podcast · 11/06/2025 · 1h 17m  

I completely relate.  I suspect with the apps, you kiss 9 frogs to find a prince. But for me, the prince would also be one who saw something cool in you AND might be a FWB.
I’m new to the apps.  I’ve had 100 or so app “inquiries” (from me or to me) which resulted in five encounters, of which 2 were princes…and I’m neither a spring chicken nor a silver fox (and there are members of this forum who’ve met me and can attest to that 😅)
Don’t make it about your appearance.  Make it about “the package” including experience, respect, nurture, fun loving etc.  Be as fit and energetic as you can be but don’t apologize for what you can’t change.  And see it as an excavation where you’re peeling back layers of mud to find a few diamonds 

Proper sensual massage doesn’t need to include a happy ending and to call it a ‘happy ending’ is wrong too. If there is a climax it doesn’t have to happen at the end. It’s best if there’s plenty of time after a guy climaxes for continuation of the massage to bring him back down again gently. Head massage and feet massage are great after climax.
Rub and tug guys do a perfunctory massage, then grab and grope at your bum and cock in a rush to get you off. They call it a sensual or erotic massage 🙄. It’s nothing of the sort. In a proper sensual massage the masseur and the client are fused together as if they are inhabiting the same body. Their breath aligns, the masseur moves seamlessly through the sequence like it’s a dance. There’s no separation between massage and ‘happy ending’ because the whole thing is erotic not just the last 5 minutes. That’s why I think guys who’ve done therapeutic massage sometimes get it wrong: they do a therapeutic massage and tag on a hand job and then charge sensual rates. You have to think of a sensual massage as a seduction from before the client even gets on the table. Work their brain as well as their body. 
 
 

This sentiment unfortunately represents a minority on these boards. If we spent half as much energy here talking about actual talent than we do how old a guy is or what he weighs, or how big his dick is, or how much sex he will give for a massage fee, we could power a city indefinitely!

Wait a few years and it will be at the cardiologist's office, at the urologist's office, the guy who knocked you out for your colonoscopy...

God forbid he is martyred for saying so.

Thank you, Harlow. My husband was my cameraman and video editor. He passed away suddenly on August 18 of this year. I hope to continue the cooking channel sometime next year. Friends have volunteered to do the camera work, but I need to sort myself out first.  
Stay tuned---thanks again for watching my channel.
 

I was semi joking. I don’t meet people on just a body part (unless it’s 10 inches) but I understand people do. They go to cum dump sessions based on only a bum pic. I think if you want to do that then it’s fine, why not? You’re just turning up and fucking him. I prefer a bit more interaction with someone before I’ll meet them off an app like Sniffies or Grindr but certainly part of the initial attraction is a picture. Then it’s the quality of their interaction and what they’re up for. If all that lines up, I’ll meet them. 

That, or he listened to too much Crystal Gayle.

Why ?
Actors act.
You don't need to be a magician to play a magician. Plenty of British actors know how to do an authentic American accent. 

I hired my regular go-to masseur for a 5-hour session in late August. Massage, a little play. Then, another masseur joined us for 4-hands and play (he was here for 90 minutes); after he left, my regular and I showered, had a snack, and then resumed the massage. It was a great birthday present to myself. 

Her late Majesty had the benefit of a childhood that Charles, William and George could never have. Not the seclusion and privilege that wealth afforded, they all share that, or shared, even though the weight of that privilege has lifted somewhat. Until she was 10 years old, her future was that of a minor princess with a life that promised comfort and the freedom to do much as she wished. At 10 her life suddenly changed to presage the one she became destined to live, she became the heir apparent and had to prepare for a different life to the one she may have thought awaited her. Her heirs were destined to the future they now have from the moment they were born.
For many years, Charles knew, or at least hoped, that his reign was in the distant future so was able to combine his preparation for it with the freedom to develop his own ideas and values. As his time approached he adjusted to the strictures that would then face, one which he now seems to have grown into and carried out with a sense of duty.
Willaim and Harry grew up with different futures, roles that came to be confirmed when William and Catherine had children, William the duty that he would assume, tempered by the years he has and would have before that time came, and Harry with the relative freedom that Elizabeth had in her early years. That has shaped the men that they today are. If the unthinkable happened and he were to ascend to the throne, from a distance I can see a man who would understand the new weight of his position and be able to meet its demands.

HOW I LEARNED I WAS GAY.
I was 17 years old, and had stopped to use the men's room in the Port Authority bus terminal in Manhattan. Suddenly a note was thrust under the divider from the next stall: "Meet me outside." Curious, I left and was approached outside the men's room by a young man who emerged from the door. He looked to be in his early to mid 20s, and he introduced himself with a name that sounded vaguely foreign, possibly French.  He was cute, slender and a little taller than I was, with dark hair and a tiny mustache. He asked, "Are you gay?" but I didn't know the word except in its normal usage as a term for being happy, so I said yes. When he asked if I would like to go back to his place, I thought,"Why not?" I had never done anything sexual with anyone, but even though I had a steady girlfriend,  I already knew I was attracted to other males. So I went with him to a room he was renting in the East Village.
When he locked the door behind us, he asked, "What are you into?" I told him I didn't know,  so he told me to take off my clothes and get into bed, and he did the same. For the next couple of hours he introduced me to the basic sex acts: sucking and fucking, as both top and bottom. When we were finished and I was getting ready to leave, I said, "Wow! I didn't know these things were possible!" He gave me a puzzled look and said, "But you said you were gay?" I looked confused, as he realized that I didn't understand the term, and he had just initiated a neophyte.

https://www.aol.com/7-best-frozen-chicken-pot-140000722.html
Best Frozen Chicken Pot Pies 
Marie Callender’s Chicken Pot Pie
Chances are that while you’re reading this, there’s a Marie Callender’s chicken pot pie sitting in your freezer, waiting to be microwaved. Do it! This is the frozen pot pie that everyone points to as the closest thing to the real deal.
The single-serve version is around 10 ounces, featuring a golden double crust that flakes when baked in the oven. Inside, there are chunks of white-meat chicken, peas, carrots, and diced potatoes all swimming in a creamy, salty gravy. The filling leans heavily on potatoes sometimes, but it’s still hearty enough to pass as dinner. Family-size versions stretch the same formula to over 40 ounces, though fans say the meat-to-gravy ratio can slip in the bigger pies.
Stouffer’s Chicken Pot Pie
Maybe Stouffer’s Chicken Pot Pie is the backup plan for when the freezer aisle is out of Marie Callender’s, but it’s still a solid backup. It’s a single-serve, 10-ounce pie with a double crust and the usual mix of chicken, peas, carrots, and potatoes in a creamy sauce. The crust can turn chewy instead of flaky, but there’s enough chicken to keep it from feeling skimpy, and the sauce is rich enough to make it filling.

In most jurisdictions photography is usually prohibited where people would have an expectation of privacy, like bathrooms, locker rooms, and dressing rooms. Signage only goes so far however to counter ignorance and boorish behavior.

While I’m slow-traveling, I’ve been keeping up with the situation back home.  Yes, Las Vegas survived downturns like the Great Depression (then a small town, it actually boomed thanks to the Hoover Dam construction) and the 2008 GFC, but this downturn is all of its own making.
The appeal of old Vegas was that middle-class tourists could come and feel like VIPs.  Sure, you lost money gambling, but pit bosses were generous with the comps.  Even when Steve Wynn changed the business model with 1989 opening of the Mirage, visitors still felt like they were getting decent value.  Restaurants were pricey, but most were really good.  Comped or at least discounted rooms were common, and free drinks were a given.
First came the resort fees, which started small and have been climbing ever since.  IMO, the snowball started rolling down the hill when the casinos ended free parking.  The old-timers said tourists would boycott, but nope they kept coming, just grumbled a bit.  That gave the bean-counters the green light to start death by a thousand cuts, nickel $ dimeing visitors with service charges at every turn and even charging a high-roller ($25K a hand!) for a $10 smoothie.
Of course, the high-rollers (refusal to comp the smoothie aside) are still treated like royalty, as are high-end business travelers, but according to numerous reports, the average Vegas visitor is treated like sh!t.  For a while, the top-tier spending more than made up for the loss of the nurse from San Antonio and the plumber from Chicago, until the desertion of the middle-class became so great that there simply weren’t enough 1 percenters to offset.
I’ve heard that the casinos are realizing their error and are trying to lure back the middle-class they so recently scorned.  Unfortunately, once you really piss off a regular customer, it’s just not that easy to get him back.

It's encouraging to know that there is still someone here who is older than I am.

In most jurisdictions photography is usually prohibited where people would have an expectation of privacy, like bathrooms, locker rooms, and dressing rooms. Signage only goes so far however to counter ignorance and boorish behavior.

While i believe it was fairly common knowldege that Linda Lavin was a bitch, it astounds me that people would leave a good paying regular gig only because they could not get on with a co worker.  I have had a few co workers along the way that I said good morning to on the first day and good bye to on the last day and spoke only business otherwise.  One can be professional and continue to do good work while not seeing eye to eye with coworkers.  It is hard to envision a series with good enough casting and good enough writing to give a second dimension to a one note character such as Flo.  

In 2001, I lived in Middletown NJ and owned a walk in medical facility.  I was supposed to attend a conference in Las Vegas and the original flight I had was at 9 05 AM out of Newark.  I changed to a later flight, 11:20 AM.  The 9:05 flight which I did not take, had several colleagues and had taken off and then circled for 6 hours waiting to land.  The passengers on that plane were not informed of what had happened and they were all questioned by government officials when they exited the plane.  I was driving to Newark airport and saw the second plane hit the tower.  I turned around and headed to my office in case people coming back to NJ needed medical attention.  The air was thick with black smoke and an acrid odor that made it difficult to breath.  As it turned out, the wind was blowing debris across the river and pretty much over my office.  Many hours later, the first people came in for medical attention.  Many people in Middletown worked at the World Trade Center and the Middletown train station had about 75 cars which were not picked up for many days.  I forget the exact number of residents of Middletown killed, but it was the highest of any neighborhood out of NYC.  
For days and then weeks, people came in with respiratory complaints and anxiety and depression.  I was shocked then and horrified now that Christine Whitman, the former governor of New Jersey made the announcement that people could return to the area safely with a day or two.  The foul odor lingered and debris flew around for about a week.  
The stories told to me then still bring tears to my eyes when I think of them.  The most surprising information concerned the people screaming as they came down the stairs trying to escape.  I never heard the news mention it and for some reason I did not consider that as likely to happen.   In my mind it was an orderly evacuation and the news did little to dissuade us of that notion.  The people with whom  I spoke, and there were more than 100 of them,  who came down the steps, certainly had a different take on it. 
A patient i had seen the day before and who had come in with a cold asked if it was okay for him to go to work. He was a chef at the Windows on the World and with my permission, he returned to work but never returned nome.  September 10th was just another work day and another patient with a cold.  September 11th was gut wrenching  and the effects on  that area of NJ were as devastating as one can imagine.  

I truly like big guys, and older guys, and big older guys. Grandpa bears have their fans! 

I was at work on the other side of New Jersey. Tried to follow events on our computers but our internet connection was overwhelmed; relied on reports from family members calling. My niece was performing with the NYC Ballet in Italy; the company had to wait a week before being able to return. My nephew, a police officer, was asked to go into the city to assist, but was told to turn around when he was halfway there since they were “locking down” access to Manhattan. My oldest brother and his partner were finishing packing and awaiting their ride to JFK airport; when the driver arrived they had to tell him what was happening and said they weren’t going anywhere. I remember a sense of disbelief and dread as well as concern for my scattered family members.

Wow does ‘proper’ mean something different where you are @Vegas_Millennial? I didn’t realise that. 
As a Brit I use ‘proper’ in the correct way because I speak ‘the King’s English’ …the standard, correct and educated form of the English language. 😉. But if the client wants it I can also do proper cor blimey London cockney…just like Dick Van Dyke 🤪.