Monarchy79

My list wasn’t rated in any type of order or preference. And I agree with you, romance is dead. There’s nothing romantic about scrolling through an app, looking at pics of guys like you’re looking at a dollar menu at McDonalds. There’s nothing like finding an immediate attraction to someone in-person. The way they walk, their body language, the way they smell, the meta-physical energy. Apps and websites don’t provide that, which is why there are so many dating and hook up fails from sites and apps.

Although I haven’t been to a place like this (in the United States), in over 10 years, I will say that the “online” options aren’t that great. The in-person options are easier and have less issues as online, such as: 1.) catfishes 2.) flaky-indecisive people 3.) people who over-chat 4.) Serial Killers There is more to attraction than what one visually sees on a screen. Whether it’s a bathhouse, bar, club, gym sauna, alley, or library, in-person interactions always work best, and provide a higher level of authenticity.

He’s highly sexual. He wouldn’t escort. He’d do it for free!

My former friend was absolutely crazy. But his insanity was masked with good looks, a charming, charismatic personality, and a form of sociopathic narcissism beyond belief. He had an extreme talent of taping into people’s weaknesses and insecurities, making them feel safe and validated, and then manipulates them into being basically devoted followers (like a cult), his fiancée, and his friends all fall into his world where everything he does wrong rationalized, everything he says is gospel and everything he believes is agreed with. He controls everything. He’s also very generous, and people who are in need, also fall into his control as well. When I was friends with him, I thought I was losIng my mind. And we kept clashing because I wouldn’t “conform”. At first, I thought I missed his friendship, but what I missed was an idea of what I wanted our friendship to be. Now, close to a year and a half of no contact, I’m relieved and I can tell the crazy stories of what I witnessed in this dude's crazy world and laugh at it.

Lmao!!!! ????

And another thing.... in many cases having a BF is overrated too. You never know what goes on behind the scenes in the perfectly-crafted “relationships.” A former friend of mine just got engaged and everyone is gushing over it (the ring Is Fabulous) but what they don’t know is: 1.) They have a one-sided open relationship (he can sleep with whomever he wants, but his fiancée must get authorization from him to play around, otherwise , it’s considered cheating ) 2.) He has ADHD , and an auto-immune disease that requires constant treatment and random times in the hospital. In addition to that, he takes numerous random medications for both. (He disclosed this long into the relationship, after he reeled him in) 3.) Although the fiancée is highly educated and had a good career, he’s close to $100k in student loan debt and has a 500 credit score 4.) my former friend is also an insomniac, but demands they share the bed nightly, so while the other one is trying to sleep, he’s up all night with the TV on. This will be a marriage of limited rest. 5.) Group sex with his friends is also a requirement. Oh, and he’s “allergic” to condoms and takes PrEP in “cycles” (which I question its efficacy), which puts him and the fiancée at risk of numerous health conditions. But their wedding will be fabulous, and their social media profiles are awesome, and depict a picture perfect relationship. My point is, take your life as it is and appreciate the beauty and value in it. And make it what you want it to be. It takes a daily practice of affirmation to reprogram your thinking.

Sounds like a situation where you’re assuming the grass is greener. Another suggestion is to avoid social media. Studies have shown that the false, “staged”, perfect lives that people depict on social media contributes to depression in many. Don’t be fooled by those “squad” pics of gay guys in groups having fabulous brunches and travel destinations. What they don’t show you is the cattiness, drama, and juvenile in-fighting that’s beyond the level of a “real housewives”, franchise. Over the years, I’ve actually minimized, “friends”, and only interact with positive people with good energy (quality over quantity)... I remember, prior to last year, for the past 15 years, my social life was innundated with trips, parties, and a bunch of gay guys. It was entertaining, but mentally draining at times as well... it was filled with petty quarreling, useless gossiping, guys who blurred sex with friednship (so literally everyone was fucking each other), jealously, displays of insecurity, pretentiousness, and conversations about dumb topics )usually centered around sex and image. Now I travel alone, have a small set of quality friendships, and have quality and total peace in my life and I love it!!!!

All I can think of is one of my first massage experiences from masseur finder, and it was terrrible. Although this guy had wonderful reviews, after meeting him and having such a terrible experience with awful energy, I realized that he does not like black guys.... he could have told me that and saved me some money, and he could have had a client he actually prefers on his table. And btw, he was black too. lol. ???

No prob. The good thing about your experiencing this is that when you do find an escort who is a match, the experience will be guaranteed to be explosively fun !!! ??

Not to switch topics, but is the loss of desire for sex really a bad thing? When I’m irritated and frustrated, it’s usually because my interest in sex is extremely high, and I can’t get any!!! When I’m busy as hell and extremely focused and forget about the desire for sex, I feel great.

I’d also recommend getting a dog.... the unconditional love you’ll get from a pooch will be truly therapeutic.

Have you considered adding exercise, and yoga to your daily routine? The two truly help with depression, produces daily endorphins and makes you feel good.

I personally believe that escorts and non-therapeutic masseurs should not only ask these questions, but make their preferences clear too. It may seem initially harsh, but it will save us all time and money in the long run. I haven’t indulged in an escort yet, but have had masseurs and will tell you, YMMV plays a significant role in one’s overall experience. Preferences and “types”, may not be fair, but this line of customer service is subjective. I’d rather be told I’m not someone’s type because of my race, age or body type and save some money, rather than have an awkward, lackluster experience with a bad vibe.

There are guys with large dicks that still curve upwards and are uncomfortable trying to point it downwards.

Agreed. Although I wear cologne daily, I make sure it is entirely scrubbed off, prior to an appointment. And in terms of being squeaky clean, I will tell you that once your masseur or service provider realizes you are shower fresh and squeaky clean (especially back there), they are relieved and many are excited and many fun things will happen. I have had many of instances of faces surprisingly buried in my butt, and it all contributed to impeccable hygiene.

Wow!!! Any client who comes to an appointment without showering immediately beforehand isn’t considerate. To spend the entire day sweating, having bodily functions, eating food and coming in contact with air, smog, grease and other environmental factors, and then to hop on a masseur’s table without showering, is flat out disrespectful, and should be told to either shower or leave.

Although I’m not overweight, I’m uncomfortable with the idea that people are correlating weight with hygiene. The two are mutually exclusive. There are guys who are in fantastic physical shape who smell bad and are dirty “down there”, front and back. To resolve this issue overall, I’d suggest The following: 1.) starting the session with all clients with an erotic shower, to ensure cleanliness, or 2.) informing all clients that you will be showered and ready prior to meeting and you expect the same of them 3.) If when getting “down to business”, there is a “sign”, that no pre-meeting bathing took place, stop work, explain why and reference item # 2

My first time was with a guy from my gym, who I met in yoga class. One day after class, he informed me that he was a CMT as well. I decided to book an appointment with him, with no inkling of an expectation. During the first massage session, he draped me with a sheet and conducted a fantastic therapeutic massage. He only charged me 50 bucks for a session that lasted 90 minutes, so of course I went back. The second time, I went back, and to my surprise, in his living room was another guy, whom he said was in massage school and needed hours. He asked me would I feel comfortable with having a Tandem session. I went along with it, but noticed that there was more extra attention to my glutes and inner thighs and there were quick pauses as if they were secretly communicating while I was face down on the table. I also noticed that the sheet conveniently kept slipping off of my butt lower and lower. I also heard heavy breathing. The massage was great and nothing erotic happened, until the third time. This time, he and his “mentee” offered me a tandem session free of charge. I get over his house and we spent some time chatting. He offers me wine and we get comfortable. I head to the massage room, and within 20 minutes the sheet comes off and so does their clothes. The rest of the two hours was spent with intermittent massaging, mutual three way oral, edging, an intense anal tongue bath. Edging through my sphincter, oiled up frottage, and an explosive ending for all three of us. I left his house spent, relieved of my tight calves and drained of all of my “life force”. A truly surprising, hot experience... although I was set up from the beginning lol

The entire vibe I get from your post makes me cringe.... “Basic sex” does not have a definition. That is YOUR interpretation. You come off as if an escort isn’t even a person, which I find to be offensive and disturbing. Just because you are hiring someone to perform a set of services, doesn’t entitle you to objectify someone in a manner that puts them in a place of an “orifice”, of gratification. If you want that, maybe you should indulge in a flesh light. The escorts aren’t the problem, YOU are. And if you worked on that “involuntarily celibate”, sexually sociopathic behavior, and vile personality maybe you would have “good sex”. If I were an escort and met you, I’d PAY YOU to put your clothes on and immediately LEAVE. I bet you’re just an entitled asswipe of a customer in every realm.... from restaurants, to escorts, to even being a customer in a store. The only “wisdom”, you’ve provided here is that the customer is NOT always right!!! ??

Hell, I’d submit a donation for the tour ?

I never said that most white gays are racist. I stated that the ones who are should just be honest about it. I’m basing my conclusions on my personal life experiences as a black gay man, living in a city, largely populated with white gay men, with a percentage who specifically do not like other ethnic groups. Not a judgment or a tarring. Just an observation. I will assume that you are a white gay man (correct me if I am wrong). And I will respectfully ask you to have a realistic reflection on discussions and views shared about race, when there are only gay white men in the room, with no other groups present, and there’s room to be free with political correctness. I’ll say that I’ve never been a fly on the wall in those conversations, but I have a very good friend who is “ethnically ambiguous”, (mixed with Native American, Mexican and Irish)... and white counterparts assume he’s white. He’s informed me of how those “real” conversations go, and he was floored, mortified and disgusted. However, I wasn’t shocked at all. I do agree with you that not all gay white men are racist. However, to paint a broad stroke and state that none of those who assert “preferences”, have a racist bone in their body, is a bit naive.

I also want to say that in the spirit of protecting political correctness and promoting a “rose colored glasses”, approach to how things operate in the real world.... it appears that we are trying to fade out the fact that racism is well and prevalent in the gay community. We cannot sweep that under the rug. I feel that ones societal beliefs and sexual preferences can, in many cases blur. Typically, from what I have observed, many whites who don’t find other ethnicities attractive, have views outside of their sexuality that are aligned with general social racism. When I am in environments with racist white gays, I’m never offended that they aren’t attracted to me... I am annoyed that they feel that I shouldn’t even be present in their space.. (bars, clubs, events, etc.)... because in reality, the space isn’t theirs. From what I have witnessed, most people who have racial sexual “preferences”, also have social racial beliefs and ideologies that promote segregation, separatism, and a Eurocentric, elitist mentality. I’m not bothered by that either. I’m bothered that no one ever seems to have the balls to just be real with it.

Good points!!! However, One can also have these preferences and be 100% racist as well. Regardless of the person’s level of bigotry, that individual has the right to be attracted to (or not), whomever they choose. It deserves no explanation.

Just enter the number 25130, in the search here, and other reviews of his profile will populate ☺️??

Thanks!!! I definitely owe ya one!!!