Monarchy79

In any type of relationship, the person in the wrong should apologize, and atone... unfortunately, in many cases, that doesn’t happen.... leaving people with a few choices: 1.) “Forgiving” in the sense of “letting it go”, and accepting the person’s wrongdoing and being the nice guy... this typically fails as the person is never acknowledged for what they did wrong, and the person who received the poor treatment and abuse never got the validation of an apology at the least (in the long term, this falls apart, and the cycle continues) 2.) Hold a permanent grudge, and seek revenge for validation. The “high”, from making things even is temporary, and the emotional energy spent hating someone is quite taxing. (I know this from personal experience) 3.) Forgive, FOR YOU, and let the experience, the person, and the hurt GO... forgiveness is about you, and the weight that’s lifted off of your souls when you forgive is astounding. You can forgive, wish the person well, and never interact with them again. You can forgive, and completely remove the person out of your life forever as well. But by all means... forgive.

LOL.... Looks like you made the thread to trash the masseur and it backfired on you... It’s ok, just chalk it up as a lesson learned in “self-awareness”...... There have been times where we all have been a jerk, a time or two... ☺️??

The person who actually seems rude in this scenario isn’t the masseur.... ?

Because I’m a human being, not a statistic... lol

Now if you keep being sarcastic... I will rise again.... ?

No sir, You are deflecting, and trying to dodge acknowledgement. If you have addressed these things CLEARLY... there would have been receipts... ? The only thing I am wrong for is frustrating you by backing you into a corner of “accountability” ? But I will formally rest.... ?

No one is “doomed”. Here’s the reality... sticking a raw dick up a raw ass doesn’t qualify as “safe sex”. Point blank. Period. that’s not a judgment, a qualification, or a statement of shame. it’s your choice, as it is many others, and I absolutely respect that. Just call it what it is... I’ll make it simpler for you, and I’ll Use myself as an example... there was another thread about eating ass and a series of bacterial infections that are spreading. People said that at we should use dental dams to eat ass safely. I can admit that I don’t use dental dams when I eat ass. I have made the choice to eat ass Unsafely, and assume the risks. I may gargle in peroxide afterwards and take post-eating precautions, but that act in itself is unsafe. I willingly accept that. There,I did it. It’s that simple. However, you don’t want to call out your behavior for what it is, because you don’t want to verbalize assuming the risk and accepting the responsibility of your actions. I’m not judging your sex acts,or your sex choices. I am flat out judging your lack of Acknowledgement and accountability. Imam Sex positive, but bullshit negative.

It’s not a fantasy. I have been “wrapped” in my condoms and they have worked every time. ???

What you stated sounds great.. yet you still haven’t addressed my original question, and you weren’t clear...and you still haven’t clarified... H, I think my clarity may have offended you by calling you out, which wasn’t my attention. Specifically that part that discusses sexual responsibility. I’m not saying that you can’t do what you want to do. What I’m saying is that your behavior could possibly contribute to the spread of other STD’s...and I don’t think you want to acknowledge that. And I can accept that to be your choice. No judgment, no shame, and no prejudices. Just transparency.

I’m truly not, This is the closest understanding I have been able to come to your way of thinking, because although you’re clear with telling me what you think of me, you have not been clear with your actual approach to sex. I thought that this was properly aligned with your beliefs.

Well someone’s having a lot of sex... because of they didn’t, STDs wouldn’t be on the rise, and this thread wouldn’t exist. ???

Well another poster accurately gave me a better idea of your philosophy, so I totally understand you now: Sex Positive: “You are positive about your decision to use PReP but not use condoms as you value your personal pleasure more than the possibility of your getting STI's and passing them onto your sex partners. You are open to taking more risky behavior when having sex and you feel good about it. You are sex positive" No judgment on my part, just be clear on how you roll. ☺️??

Here’s what you said: “Let's put it this way, paraphrasing a friend. 100% safety does not exist; we all take different precautions as we all have different levels of risk taking. The thing is to set the limits that make you comfortable, and then trust and relax. If you think that you practice safe sex because you use condoms, you are delusional. You are puritanical and judgmental when you shame those who do accept a higher risk taking than you do.” Which didn’t answer my question (which is a simple one): Do you consider your sex practices to be safe sex? Yes or No? I’ll go first to be clear: I use condoms. I consider that to be a safe sex practice. Your turn...

I do hope you understand that many of the people who exude the behaviors he is describing in his posting would consider themselves to be sex positive.

I I think you might be missing his point, which I think is that “sex positivity”, is used as a term to excuse sexual responsibility and accountability....

You still haven’t addressed my question. ☺️ which is, please explain to me how barebacking is considered a “safe sex” practice? That’s all I’m asking here.

?

perfect clarification. The term “sex positive”, usually gets muddled for me when it comes to accountability. I’m totally open to various progressive views on sex, fetishes, and untraditional practices and relationships. Here’s an example of a difference for me.... and I’ll give two scenarios where I am “sex positive”, and the other where I am puritanical. Scenario #1: My name is Bob. I am positive/undetectable. I am open with all of my partners. I love bareback sex, and regularly participate in sero-converting orgies where all parties are aware of the dynamics. totally acceptable to me. I’m totally sex positive... enjoy yourself and do your think Scenario #2: My name is Bob. I am negative. I love bareback sex, but it’s safe because I’m on PrEP. I love bareback sex and have an active sex life. I’m invincible and you can’t “judge”, me. Scenario 2 always concerns me because of the reasons I’ve stated in my previous posts. This is where I end up going down the “puritanical road”....

Again, no apologies necessary.... I’m not offended nor am I sensitive... lol. Let’s get into the points here. You made some good ones that gives me a better understanding as to why we disagree here... 1.) I agree that 100% safety does not exist. But I will explain why I feel that putting on a condom is an act of safe sex. a. It involves placing a barrier over a body part that’s being inserted into another body part b. The intent is to guard fluids that may contain bacteria, infection, or antibodies from entering. c. It protects the skin that’s connecting during intercourse as well. its the equivalent of putting your hand into an oven mitt, before touching the skillet. I’ve used condoms during sex, and have used them with those who were HIV positive (and may not have known it). Some of those people are dead. I’m alive and HIV-free. Condoms were proven to be safe for me. Secondly. Through condom use, I have had successful test results for STDs as well. I have been blessed, but I contribute this to using condoms. 2.) wearing seatbelts doesn’t guarantee 100% prevention from a fatality, but that doesn’t mean that the use of seatbelts should be eliminated altogether. Where I disagree with you is the idea that condoms are useless because they aren’t 100% safe (nothing in life is 1. please keep in mind that millions of people who used condoms before prep are free of HIV and other STDs... I’m one of those people. These facts can’t be refuted . 3.) I see no “shame” in your sex practices... I actually am impressed and entertained with your posts of your wild exploits, many of which are quite hot. I actually speak out of concern... I am concerned when people are blinded by liberated actions, thinking that there is no consequence or side effect. Now if you said “hey, I like bareback sex, and I’m fine with the potential risks”, then I totally respect that. But the idea that PrEP, is this wonder pill that eliminates the use of any other precautionary measure, is just as delusional. Here’s my disconnect... You can take a PrEP pill, and prevent HIV transmission... I can slap on a condom and prevent transmission of HIV, HPV, Syphyllis, Gonorrhea, Chlymidia, and other numerous infections. So the idea that condoms are useless is false, I’m living proof of that.

I agree with you 1000%!!!

You’re response solidified your trigger. No need for a backhanded apology... serves neither one of us any benefit. I don’t have any rage. If I recall correctly, your post was filled with name calling and inflammatory statements.... does the term “sex-negative-moron”, ring a bell? ? Anywho, I still would like for you to educate me on how you practice “safe sex”, by regular, consistent barebacking with multiple partners, and how this prevents the spread of the STDs that PrEP doesn’t protect. No judgment here... I truly need your informative take on this.

I won’t get into politics , but I will tell you that I don’t feel that there is a limitation in the resources for STD screenings. Where I live, there are numerous resources for STD screenings, all free, and government-funded. And there are resources for free healthcare coverage for the poor, and the homeless too. I really think the issue here with sexual health is a personal accountability issue. And it’s so personal, because this revolves around personal decisions we make in how we use our bodies and our personal takes on sex, safe sex, and what’s “right”. As there’s no clear cut answer to this question, there will probably never be a solution, except the creation of a vaccine given at birth that prevents HIV and all other STDs too.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.nbcnews.com/news/amp/ncna1064256

Sidebar question: What’s so wrong with being on PrEP AND using condoms?

Good point. However, I don’t necessarily think that condom users feel less of a need to get tested. They just aren’t mandated to. I’ll go further to say that if PrEP users weren’t mandated to quarterly testing, they probably wouldn’t be tested as much either. I believe this because I feel as if the average person doesn’t visit the doctor for preventative medicine, but to address symptoms when they arrive (I’m speaking generally here, not just in regards to sexual health) Now, this week, California became the first state to approve the purchase of PrEP, without a prescription, which means that those doctor visits will possibly significantly decline... which in my humble opinion, will cause the rates of STDs to skyrocket.