SecretProvider

You were absolutely taken advantage of and you should have been paid more. That is an hourly rate. NOT an overnight. It makes way more sense now with what he was doing with his fake uber and promises of 'future payments'. You are still new to the business and only working 5 months and he for sure took advantage of you in a bad way. If you have any questions or guidance please feel free to reach out by DM.

I saw a guys profile the other day and he gave advice as to how to reach out and I thought it was fantastic - Short, simple, polite, and serious! Hello, my name is (Desired name) I’m in (Desired City) and i would like to get together with you (Desired date and time) I’m interested in ( Desired information) I can almost guarantee that you will get a good reply if you use this template with a solid provider. I think a good general rule is = you get the same energy back you put into the message.

I once had an overnight with a client I had seen for a few 1 - 2 hour sessions prior. When it got to 2am I was feeling VERY sleepy, was way past my bed time. The client then explained to me that he was a night shift worker, and expected me to be awake and engaged for the whole evening, which i just simply could not do since I had been up at 7am that morning. The variance of what people consider 'normal' or 'commonsense' is vast.

What a wonderful anecdote to read. Thank you for sharing that. Made me giggle. And the moral of the story you extrapolate from it is VERY TRUE.

At first no one knew. Then I confessed to one friend who was accepting. slowly but surely more of my closets friends found out. Some family know. No one has been judgey.

No, what I didn't believe was that they demanded you hand over your phone so they could go into your account, type up a review and post it. And you let them. That people ask for reviews - of course people do. As people pointed out above - you can barely shit in a toilet without being asked to give a review.

@SirBillybob fascinating how we can both look at same provider and get a differing answer. I couldn't understand how - but it appears the rent.men site is showing a more accurate number, whereas rentmen.eu is just showing the picture with 4.5 stars. So i guess we are both right depending what version of the site you are using. On rentmen.eu a 4.8 does not get rounded up to 5 stars for Dylan, but a 4.96 does go up to 5 stars (for tyler) and they both show as 4.5 star picture in rentmen.eu This is all too much math for me right now, but I eat my words (with rent.men) Thanks for showing me this!

If it was possible to pull down ALL bad reviews, there would be none on the site at all. Having said that, I have had a bad review removed -but I had to show evidence that the client was lying beyond a shadow of doubt before rentmen would agree to remove it. They did not make it easy. It took many back and forth emails, and they required documentary evidence before they acquiesced. I had to prove it wasn't just he said/she said moment. I would say if you want to leave a bad review and not have it removed if it is contested, be prepared to back it up with evidence.

Yes, correct. They don't round it up. If you are able to find a provider with ONE 4 star review, and still have 5 star rating, please let me know so I can happily eat my words. My understanding is they do not. EDIT - I did some quick research - This provider for eg, has 85 reviews, all 5 star except ONE, which is 2 stars. https://rentmen.eu/TylerxPeck/reviews/ So 85 reviews x 5 stars = 420. 1 x review 2 stars = 2. Total stars is 422. Divide Total stars by Total reviews 422 ÷ 85 = 4.96 So his score *should* be 5 stars, yet it shows as 4.5 still. EDIT (I am not tyler peck. I have never met tyler peck. I just picked the first person in NYC who has one bad review and still shows as not 5 star despite high number of reviews)

"Client refused to send minimal deposit and insisted I pay for my own airfare to go to appointment 🫠" You don't have to be afraid, just simply be aware of the impact, and ask yourself "will the impact justify this action?" Some interactions deserve to have poor reviews. In this business a 4 star review is a poor review. I am sensing there may be a generational gap here, so let me illustrate more the impact - keeping in the forefront of your mind I have never said 'don't leave bad reviews when warranted'. A online review is modern day version to writing down a notice and sticking it up on a restaurants door for EVERY customer to see before they enter, for the next 5 years (Or maybe a better analogy is placing a stone plaque on the entrance - since they stay there forever.) It is not like a letter to the editor in a newspaper only read by people that week, or chatting with friends about whether you think they would like the movie or not. It is published FOREVER. Superglued to that provider for eternity like a scarlet letter. Would you feel comfortable posting a note like that to warn people? If yes - write the 4 star review. If no, then don't. If a server forgot to add ketchup in your to go bag with fries, you wouldn't feel like posting the note (I would hope). If the server overcharged your card hundreds of $$$ and then refused to give you a refund, you would leave that note. If the server didn't put ice in your water, you wouldn't feel like posting one, but if they served you a drink in a unwashed glass with cockroaches in it - you would and rightly so. It is not an insult, it just has a disproportionate impact than it should. ( Well, actually now I think about it more - you are correct it is an insult, because of the impact. Maybe that IS a good way to view it. If you want to insult your provider - leave 4 stars. If you don't, don't.) You are correct that reviews on RM is not a great system. An imperfect system, but it is all we have to work with. For legal reasons the text written on the reviews are only visible to people who are aware that they can do so by using a VPN. All people see is 'this person left me unhappy/unsatisfied', and the inference is 'you will be unhappy too'. I guess the other question to ask yourself is - would I hire someone with 4 star review? If you wouldn't, think of that before you leave one. And if you would - just be aware that despite it not bothering you - it will turn many people off from hiring that person again, they will never be able to recover that 5 star rating even if they see 100 more 5 star appointments. If you think that is deserved, by all means go for it. If you take this comment as intended Have a nice 5 star day. If you choose to be offended, have a 4 star one.

sent you a DM

Without knowing WHY it was only 'meh' and not GREAT - I can only speak from a providers point of view - and that would be: To leave a less than 5 star review would immediately drop his rating to 4.5 and it would never be 5 star ever again. It would result in less work for him in perpetuity and impact his career forever. Unless he has done something that warrants that: please don't. If you still feel feedback is warranted without such severe consequences, option 4 is to send it to him keeping in mind the principles of (is it kind, is it necessary, is it helpful and is it true) I think in this case: it would be if you are explaining to him how it would go from 'meh' to 'great'. So if you can't ignore him (I can almost guarantee that is what he would prefer) - let him know why you felt it wasn't 5 star and secondly, what he can do to improve for the next person in text. If it's just that the chemistry wasn't there, and there is no advice to how to improve the experience, just leave it be. p.s - to be clear I personally have never asked for a review, and I think do think there are places for poor reviews. 'meh' is not one of them.

you are correct it most definitely touched @Mark_fl nerve.

If you see a provider on a dating app and are thinking of trying to hit him up 'off the clock' - don't. As the old saying goes "please don't ask for discounts as refusal may offend" The idea that other people may be getting it for free upset some. It ruins the fantasy, the illusion, and causes offense when you are turned down. Likewise, if you see a provider lists preferences, this can ruin the illusion too. I have seen another provider list on grindr they were looking for hairy guys. I am not very hairy. And so, when I have been asked to arrange threesomes I have not reached out to him. If I had not seen that grindr profile I probably would have. So i get it.

Follow the lead of the client. Look for body queues as to what it is they want. For eg. If they get up and get dressed, I mirror that energy. If they get up to do after sex pee, I stay as is, and encourage a cuddle, but if they then start getting dressed - so do I. I never start 'packing up' until the client does. Yeah sometimes the energy in the air is 'i want this guy out so I can get on with my day now'. Some guys as soon as they blow their load - it is over. they start thinking about their wives, and guilt comes in. The session was purely about sex and nothing more. Others are craving intimacy and connection, and pillow talk is a big part of that.You have to learn to be acutely aware of what they are wanting. Often client will not come out and say it, we have to read body language. This is SO IMPORTANT. Sometimes I worry that clients think I am stalling or trying to stretch time out, but in truth - I am building up tension, sussing out what they are interested in REALLY, learning a bit more about them, looking to find things in common. I am not a clock watcher, the hour is over whenever it naturally ends (within reason) - but the ice breaking at the beginning always leads to a better session.

Not sure if you are argumentative with me just for the sake of it - but by your own reasoning - the entire hobby itself is 'contrary to [] rules....for a reason.' You are being asinine for no reason. Be kind. Was just pointing out the fact that there are SOME legit guys on there. Just not the 'urgent' ones. Have a great day!

some legit guys advertise on sniffies/grindr on the side by saying they are 'open to gen', but they will be able to send you their RM profile. It's risky because the platforms shut you down when people get offended you will only fuck them for $ or think you are a scam and you lose access to that market (and also to use it for personal reasons) @7829V The guys asking for urgent amounts - 100% always either a scam or a situation that is not pleasant (drug addict situation). Stick with professionals. As the old saying goes - you get what you pay for.

That's how they trap you, but that is also your mistake. Sometimes when big jobs come along it is tempting to move from our normal boundaries. While this client may be kind and generous in some ways - he at best has issues with the client/provider dynamic, and at worst is trying to get more for nothing. And the deception about the uber in order to leave you stranded in another city, what a frightful and actually scary way to behave. When these situations arise and people are negotiating big trips, it can be hard because you want to be flexible enough to land the big gig, but also you have to be able to walkaway afterwards (or during) feeling devalued. We have to be able to say "my daily rate is XYZ", and what happened to you on this trip is why. You need to be able to walk away from a negation. I personally price my long trips quite high because the reality is, being 'ON' 24/7 is draining, emotionally, physically and very taxing. Having said that - @RALLX If i was making an international trip with a client and forgot to pack my shaver, I would hope my client didn't make such a big deal of it. I have forgotten things like that. But I also wouldn't be so rude as to insist on certain brands and so forth with clothes. Good luck for your next trips and although everything should be discussed first, it is normal that a provider is not out of pocket for the trip. So drinks/food/activities are covered by the client. If the provider wants to buy themselves something while they are away, they can, and if the client wants to buy the provider gifts - they can. Gifts are never to be 'expected'. Not by anyone with manners anyway.

I have received the following requests - come clean shaven. let your stubble grow out. trim your chest hair, shave your chest hair. make sure balls are sooth, shave all your pubic hair, let your pubic hair grow out, wear cologne, don't wear cologne. Wear a suit and tie. Wear gym clothes. Wear preppy clothes. wear a cap. wear boxers. wear white briefs. wear no underwear. Wear jockstrap. answer the door with just a towel on. be having sex when I walk in and join. Wear your socks for a few days. wear same underwear for a few days. The list goes on and on. As always - it is best to JUST ASK what you are wanting. Side note - it can be pretty rude to say to not just a provider, but anyone, things like "i preferred it when you had smooth chest/long hair/no tattoos etc etc'

it appears you lack comprehension skills as well as manners John Wayne Gacy. I don't actually need too, but here we go - I said of course you would come and applaud that behavior and commenting. I never said you wrote those things yourself- THIS TIME.

To the surprise of absolutely NO ONE you come out to delight in saying gross things about people from behind your keyboard in your dank basement. Perfect example of someone who has absolutely nothing going for them in life and they get off on talking shit about guys who would never look twice at them. Pigs like to roll in shit. No one has a problem with people expressing opinions. Where did anyone say you can't express an opinion? No one is shaming anyone for not liking the guy - but to say someone is worthless is shameful and deserves to be ridiculed. You should be embarrassed to talk like that. And if you had decency, you would be. The culture has moved on John Wayne Gacy and you haven't got with the program yet - the way people were commenting was vile and an unacceptable way to behave these days.

The best course of action, as always - is to pose this exact question to your provider. Enjoy!

Ebori - My dude when you read this forum, don't stress or feel bad. You are 21, you have a great body, beautiful eyes, a head full of hair. You are very sexy and most of these guys commenting are lurkers who have absolutely nothing going for them in life and they get off on talking shit about guys who would never look twice at them.

They are only accepting crypto payments currently. Been like this all day. It seems mastercard, like visa and amex are no longer accepted. This will be a big blow to their business model for sure.

fixed. thanks.