Rgsnva

HectorHungDaddy - Male Escort, Gay massage - Washington | Rent.Men
RENT.MEN HectorHungDaddy Gay Escort in Washington, District of Columbia, available for Gay Escorting,Modeling,Erotic... In DC usually.  Met him 4 times.   Hot af and a really nice guy. 

So, fellow size queens, who would you say is the provider (escort or masseur) who is hung the best and makes you salivate the minute you lay your eyes on the goods?  ( around DC or MD ).

Has anyone met up with him recently?

Thanks for posting the question.  I wish I’d read it 6 months ago.  I’m fairly new at being a client (about a year and a half), but my preconceived notions about what the providers would be like was far from accurate.  I didn’t think they’d be jerks, but I didn’t really expect to find them so likable either (which was crappy of me).  Not my wheelhouse - but I suspect that to be successful at being a provider, you have to care enough about the people who hire you, and be kind and empathetic enough to tap into what they want and need, so they have a good time and come back to you.  In other words, to be good at it, you have to be a good guy.  I had a bad experience, and I’m glad he wasn’t my first or I wouldn’t have done it again, but I’ve also met some good men.  So I hope it’s possible to be friends, if the opportunity presents. The provider who has become my regular is a good guy, we have some stuff in common, and we like doing things together. We’ve had VERY open conversation about what has to happen for any friendship to work (partly because he watched me get burned), and we seem to agree that the communication is key, but also ground rules, because he has a living to earn and I respect that.  Right now, the current agreement is that if he initiates getting together, regardless of what occurs or doesn’t, it’s social.  If I initiate, it’s business, at the going rate for his time. If there’s an exception, it’s clearly made and agreed upon when the invitation happens.  He tends to be generous, and I’ve had to say a couple of times “no, it’s been x hours, so that’s not enough.” I’m trying to be conscientious about that.  It seems to be working.  
 
 

Thanks for posting the question.  I wish I’d read it 6 months ago.  I’m fairly new at being a client (about a year and a half), but my preconceived notions about what the providers would be like was far from accurate.  I didn’t think they’d be jerks, but I didn’t really expect to find them so likable either (which was crappy of me).  Not my wheelhouse - but I suspect that to be successful at being a provider, you have to care enough about the people who hire you, and be kind and empathetic enough to tap into what they want and need, so they have a good time and come back to you.  In other words, to be good at it, you have to be a good guy.  I had a bad experience, and I’m glad he wasn’t my first or I wouldn’t have done it again, but I’ve also met some good men.  So I hope it’s possible to be friends, if the opportunity presents. The provider who has become my regular is a good guy, we have some stuff in common, and we like doing things together. We’ve had VERY open conversation about what has to happen for any friendship to work (partly because he watched me get burned), and we seem to agree that the communication is key, but also ground rules, because he has a living to earn and I respect that.  Right now, the current agreement is that if he initiates getting together, regardless of what occurs or doesn’t, it’s social.  If I initiate, it’s business, at the going rate for his time. If there’s an exception, it’s clearly made and agreed upon when the invitation happens.  He tends to be generous, and I’ve had to say a couple of times “no, it’s been x hours, so that’s not enough.” I’m trying to be conscientious about that.  It seems to be working.  
 
 

Oh no, maybe that wasn’t clear. He’s put some things on social media that someone not knowing wouldn’t recognize, but once you know some info they’re clearly threatening.  And his texts to me are far more direct.  I’ve got the evidence and plenty of it.  As for the info, I work in a school.  Schools put info about their faculty online.  If you Google my name, that’s the first thing that comes up. From there it would only take a click or two to find out who else works there.   I’m lucky about where I work (my parents and kids say Happy Pride to me in June even).  If I worked in a different place I could be in some deep shit.  My last name is on my Venmo account (I should change that), and from there I’m sure it was easy to find.  

Y’all are good people.  Lots of good advice and support here.  Even the few I might not be 100% on board with, if I didn’t want your response I shouldn’t have asked the question, right? So I appreciate you all.  I’m glad I found this forum.  

Thanks, all, for your thoughts and advice.  I’m resolute that I’m not giving him any money.  That’s a non-starter.  You’re all right he has more to lose than I do.  If he goes to my work. I won’t get fired or anything like that.  It might be embarrassing, but I’m retiring in June, so who cares.  But he will be in a boatload of trouble if he does.  He won’t go to cops - his crime is a lot more than mine.  

Y’all are good people.  Lots of good advice and support here.  Even the few I might not be 100% on board with, if I didn’t want your response I shouldn’t have asked the question, right? So I appreciate you all.  I’m glad I found this forum.  

I’ve been that guy who fell hard for a provider, but after several sessions, not just one.  It’s not so much a loneliness thing or something unattractive guys do (I don’t think I’m either).   I think for some of us that level of intimacy just inspires an emotional bond.  I have to be pretty careful to reign it in.  Try to be nice to him - among other things, it can be embarrassing when you realize it.  

It is one thing to say the situation sounds odd, and pose questions because of it. It’s another to say the story “doesn’t pass the smell test.” Translation: You’re a liar.
Yes, that’s totally uncalled for. 

Good array of options given, it’s always good to have more than 1 choice at hand. I think you drafted up a pretty decent consultation lol.
However, and this is just from experience : unless someone already has a lawyer on call (and I’ve known guys who have lawyer friends which is easy), I’d just be “reasonable” about expectations. Back when I was younger and dumber (and too trusting of so-called friends), I’ve had a couple situations that required having to consult a lawyer.
Lawyers aren’t always interested in “disputes”. They’re also in biz to make money. And a lot of lawyers are honest and will tell you in their free consolidation: “this isn’t going to make me money OR this case is too petty for me to pursue, you don’t have a case, etc”. Of course it doesn’t seem that way, but from the outside looking in, that’s what it could be. 
 
In a case like that, something like a police report and restraining order will save the $1,200 one may have to pay an attorney to handle it. And most likely, that’s what they’ll refer anyway.
I actually briefly had a stalker in Nashville years ago. I reached out to the police, but it wasn’t anything promising they could offer. I think what finally stopped was, I can’t remember anymore what I did…but he finally backed off.

Well I should clarify; it’s not that I don’t believe what happened: it’s just that it sounded like something else might have been at play (no pun intended). But I’m not going to gaslight your story, because only you and him know what happened. 
I was just moreso wondering about how did this and that happen in the way it did. But your honesty in that you were horny (I think many of us have been guilty of horny fog 😶‍🌫️ at some point) was understandable. But by all means, dude was out of pocket in the situation. I think he knew what he was doing…however if he was a real bait and switch, he should have just asked you when you walked in the door, and made sure he got the money. Or turned you away. To go thru with it, and then the next day come after you…just seems off.
So you aren’t in the wrong, but I don’t think threatening to shutdown RentM was the answer. However I do agree, they should do some better screening and I’ve said it before: there needs to be a tutorial on RM training clients and escorts how to book and behave. People barely even know how to read an ad, let alone deal with a confronting situation 🤦🏾‍♂️ 

Y’all are good people.  Lots of good advice and support here.  Even the few I might not be 100% on board with, if I didn’t want your response I shouldn’t have asked the question, right? So I appreciate you all.  I’m glad I found this forum.  

Y’all are good people.  Lots of good advice and support here.  Even the few I might not be 100% on board with, if I didn’t want your response I shouldn’t have asked the question, right? So I appreciate you all.  I’m glad I found this forum.  

Y’all are good people.  Lots of good advice and support here.  Even the few I might not be 100% on board with, if I didn’t want your response I shouldn’t have asked the question, right? So I appreciate you all.  I’m glad I found this forum.  

Thanks, all, for your thoughts and advice.  I’m resolute that I’m not giving him any money.  That’s a non-starter.  You’re all right he has more to lose than I do.  If he goes to my work. I won’t get fired or anything like that.  It might be embarrassing, but I’m retiring in June, so who cares.  But he will be in a boatload of trouble if he does.  He won’t go to cops - his crime is a lot more than mine.  

No, that’s the whole thing.  The first time didn’t rock my world, but not awful either.  After the second I wouldn’t have hired again. And didn’t.  I was clear about not paying, he said no worries.  Why did I see him after that?  It was a different thing, I guess.  We even had a pretty long conversation about how it would be different if I wasn’t a client.  I guess I can’t answer it any better than to say I thought I’d give it a whirl.  But it’s a valid question. 

I think the only thing I’ll disagree with is about RM.  They do have some responsibility to both providers and clients to have some eye towards safety.  If someone can provide proof of something like this, which I can, it should be a no brainer for them to remove an individual, with a format for disputing if you get removed unjustly.  Other platforms do.  This is a thing that shouldn’t have to operate under the table anyway (meaning it should be legal) so I think we should hold them to the same standard.  
 
Re: the not paying and meeting him anyway…it was a stupid move, I get it.  But I’m not sure I see the reluctance to believe it.  No, he wasn’t something I’d pay for…but he said okay and  I…well… you’re horny and somebody's right there giving it away…it wasn’t reason and intellect calling the shots right then.  

Y’all are good people.  Lots of good advice and support here.  Even the few I might not be 100% on board with, if I didn’t want your response I shouldn’t have asked the question, right? So I appreciate you all.  I’m glad I found this forum.  

I think the only thing I’ll disagree with is about RM.  They do have some responsibility to both providers and clients to have some eye towards safety.  If someone can provide proof of something like this, which I can, it should be a no brainer for them to remove an individual, with a format for disputing if you get removed unjustly.  Other platforms do.  This is a thing that shouldn’t have to operate under the table anyway (meaning it should be legal) so I think we should hold them to the same standard.  
 
Re: the not paying and meeting him anyway…it was a stupid move, I get it.  But I’m not sure I see the reluctance to believe it.  No, he wasn’t something I’d pay for…but he said okay and  I…well… you’re horny and somebody's right there giving it away…it wasn’t reason and intellect calling the shots right then.  

Thanks, all, for your thoughts and advice.  I’m resolute that I’m not giving him any money.  That’s a non-starter.  You’re all right he has more to lose than I do.  If he goes to my work. I won’t get fired or anything like that.  It might be embarrassing, but I’m retiring in June, so who cares.  But he will be in a boatload of trouble if he does.  He won’t go to cops - his crime is a lot more than mine.  

I have to agree with @BOZO T CLOWNand @Vin_Marco. Even though the situation is upsetting for sure, it just doesn’t seem right. But I can’t say necessarily one way or another.
Not sure why the provider would wait until the next day, and just not when he was there to ask for the phantom payment. Why would he leave, and then…
Wait, who went to whose place on this meeting in the first place?
And I agree with @DrownedBoy, it’s no reason to drag RentMen under the bus 🚌, and jeopardize every provider’s earning or give RentMen MORE reasons to lock us down MORE than they’ve already done (no nudes, no rates, no mention of even the word escort being allowed, etc.) They have no responsibility any more than Grindr, Adam, or your local gay bar or bath house has…for something happening to you, OUTSIDE of the venue at hand. It happens. And they won’t have any grounds to be shutdown, because it’s an advertising platform with no rates. 
 
I agree you should probably just settle and pay him a portion and see if that helps. You could always flip the script and say you’re going to look him up too, but: fire and fire equals: 💣 🌋 
However, I just don’t 100% see it. I mean to go from “you can’t afford it” to him saying “let’s do it anyway” just sounds too messy and confusing. Like wtf. Even if he said let’s do it anyway, I still woulda said: “I don’t want to cheat you BUT, let’s be clear this is a free service right? And reiterate that before and during meeting, and again after if you have to. 
 
But yeah…sounds crazy. I hate hearing stuff like this because then some clients run with stories like this, and call ANY escort who asks for payment for a cancelled or session that went longer than planned/parts of a session wasn’t expected a scammer/blackmailer/etc. Hell…I even think many gay dudes think we’re scammers just for the mere fact of trying to sell our services in the first place. It’s just sad. There doesn’t need to be all this animosity in the biz if people were just transparent from the get go. 

DISCLAIMER - As advised above, contact a lawyer (if you can afford it) before dealing with the police. What I say below is from personal experience, but based largely on my location (Chicago) and some less savory knowledge I picked up over the years. However, I have successfully used this in other states.
If you're in the closet, and want to remain that way, I feel very sorry for you, and wish you'd get more comfortable with yourself. In this case, I would offer the guy a token amount (like $50) and tell him to take it or leave it, else you'll go to the cops. I wouldn't recommend the full amount, or he'll want more.
If you have to go to the police and can't afford a lawyer, I've personally found the following strategies work:
Tell the cops you were using a "gay dating app." That's technically true, and most will immediately assume it's Grindr. Tell the truth for the specific encounter - he came over for casual sex, and now he's trying to shake you up for money. Don't lie, just give the basic facts. Most cops, when they see two gay men in a situation like this, want nothing better than to label it as a "domestic" and get the hell away. They don't want to get involved with gay relationships (many of them are blue-collar conservative). If you mention (again, truthfully, don't lie) that you and him met for casual sex in the past, leaving out the payment part, they will likely automatically label it as a domestic disturbance, and simply warn the other guy off. If you have to admit transactional sex, call it a "sugar daddy" situation. The cops are not likely to even listen to the other guy, especially if you show them selectively chosen (but real) threats he made. If you're an employed, respectable professional (and so far it sounds like you are), the cops will make a snap judgment call and ignore the other guy and any "evidence" he would try to give them. Unless they're doing a sting, police aren't going to dig through a long list of texts over a domestic disturbance based on a few casual sex encounters, and definitely not from someone they perceive as unhinged or less-than-respectable. Like it or not, the best way to deal with police is to create believability as quickly as possible, and there are many techniques to do so. Try learning some of them. Whatever happens, make sure you give a good donation at the next police fundraiser.
The times this happened to me, I just told the would-be-blackmailed to "f**k off" unless he wanted to get the law involved. As others said, you'd get a fine, and he'd go to prison.
Also, don't be above taking a defensive position yourself. I have several photos on my phone from my practice range, and showing it to other people generally keeps them from screwing with me.

 

Not to mention that the guy evidently reads posts here and can conclude unequivocally the source of his ad status change. 

Or don't do those things if you are operating on the DL.  I wouldn't care if someone threatened to show photos of me to my friends because the only photos someone would receive from me are the ones I would put up on a site like Adam4Adam.  Typically I don't have full frontal shots that show my face, but obviously someone could attempt to put the face photo and naked torso together to "prove" it's me.  That never really mattered to me, though, since no one would be surprised that I'm gay and that I look for sex with men online. 
No one deserves to be blackmailed (obviously).  I'm on the side of those saying that it makes more sense to call the blackmailer's bluff by indicating you will contact law enforcement if they continue to harass you after you block their initial number.  Never give into a blackmailer's threats by giving them money.  Why would anyone assume that someone who is willing to do that is a man of his word who will stop the blackmailing after they get the money they want?  All paying their demand accomplishes is identifying you as someone who is so worried about their threats that you are willing to send them money.